All you need to know about me is that I HATE giving personal information on cyberspace.

COPY & PASTE TIME!

99 WAYS TO GET KICKED OUT OF WALMART

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.

3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals throughout the day.

4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.

5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.

7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.

8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

9. When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW, especially thin narrow aisles.

10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in Housewares," and see what happens.

11. Get several of those frogs (that croak when somebody walks by) from the Garden Dept. and place in strategic locations throughout store.

12. Play with the automatic doors.

13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long," etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.

14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who BUYS this junk, anyway?"

15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.

16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you're taking it for a test drive.

17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.

18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.

19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

20. Put M&M's on layaway.

21. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.

23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, “I’m Batman. Come, Robin, to the Batcave!"

26. TP as much of the store as possible.

27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.

28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello" upside down. (How to do it: press 0.1134 on the calculator, them turn it upside down.)

29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

30. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., "Do you have any Shnerples here?"

31. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

32. Take bets on the battle described above.

33. Hold indoor shopping cart races.

34. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission: Impossible."

35. Try on bras in the sewing/fabric department.

36. Try on bras over top of your clothes.

37. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.

38. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.

39. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?"

40. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

41. Two words: "Marco Polo."

42. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.

43. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's in Electronics, while head banging & playing air guitar to Willie Nelson demos. (Bonus: Braid hair & tie bandanna around head).

44. Make a trail of lemonade on the ground, leading to the restrooms.

45. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.

46. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.

47. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

48. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.

49. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

50. Try putting different pairs of women's panties on your head and walk around the store casually.

51. Turn on toys that make noise or talk at random intervals, and leave them in strategic locations.

52. Leave small sacrifices or gifts in the hands of the mannequins.

53. Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

54. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, "Red Rover!"

55. Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

56. Set up another battlefield with GI Joes vs. Barbies. (Red lipstick might give an interesting effect!!)

57. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

58. While no one's watching quickly switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the rest room.

59. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

60. Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "the fat man walks alone," and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.

61. Beg the greeter for those happy-face stickers. Stick them on your face, then stand next to him and copy whatever he says when customers walk in.

62. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

63. Get a stuffed animal and go to the front of the store and begin stroking it lovingly, saying "Good girl, good Bessie."

64. Try on every pair of shoes in the shoe department. Take the paper from the boxes and throw it in various aisles.

65. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

66. If you're female: Take some men's clothes to the mens fitting room and ask to try them on. Act shocked and insist, "But I AM a man," if the attendant says anything. If you're a man, vice versa.

67. Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren’t looking.

68. Lurk in the cosmetics department and spray people with a bottle of strong perfume as they walk by. Lean in and sniff the perfume, then wave your hand in front of your nose and saying "P-eeew! That perfume stinks!"

69. Plastic fake-vomit and fake-dog doo can be utilized effectively here.

70. Go outside to the payphones, call the store and ask them to page customer "Mike Hunt" (or "Harry Butz", etc.)

71. Stand in front of the Preparation H. Ask everyone who walks by which hemorrhoid remedy they prefer, then launch into a detailed description of your own problem.

72. While you're doing that, have white-out & markers handy. Modify the boxes of "Anusol" by covering up the "OL" on the logo.

73. Crawl around on the ground and pretend that your a cat. Meow when people walk by, rub up against their legs, etc.

74. Take a chair to Electronics, tune in all the TV’s to Young & the Restless, and watch while sobbing loudly.

75. Chase your friends up and down aisles with those electric cars. Make sure to tell your friends to act like they don't know you.

76. Ride the little rides for toddlers. Fit the character; if on a horse, act like a cowboy, etc. If a little kid comes over wanting to use it, start crying.

77. One word: STREAK!

78. Excessively use anything thing that says "Try Me".

79. Start pocketing any and all free samples.

80. Draw mustaches on all the pictures and mannequins.

81. Walk up to the customer service and say "Hello, I'll have a Quarter Pounder with cheese, large fries and a diet coke." Then go to Mc Donald's and try to return a toaster.

82. Start to madly scratch yourself and walk up to people asking where the rash cream and lice remedies are.

83. When alone, have loud conversations with your "multiple personalities".

84. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to "10".

85. Try on crazy costumes and walk casually through the store.

86. Act suspicious and stick your arm in your jacket when leaving store. As you’re walking through the doors act like you’re expecting the alarms to go off. Then quickly look around you to see who's watching and run away as fast as your can.

87. Balance EVERYTHING you see on the tips of your finger, your nose, your forehead, and the top of your head while singing the circus song.

88. Put jockstraps in the lingerie department.

89. Put lingerie in the men's department.

90. Stand in the sock aisle, and give each package a stern lecture.

91. Spend hours staring at a little blinking light and say "blink" each time it blinks. Don't look away, just stay mesmerized.

92. In the Garden Dept., skip through the flowers while holding your arms out and "buzzing".

93. With friends, stage a "sit-in" in all the bean-bag chairs in Furniture Dept.

94. Walk up to a guy and say "It's YOU!! I haven't seen you in so long!!" and kiss him, then say "Why didn't you ever call me?" and walk away. Much more effective if you’re also a guy.

95. Stand next to a mannequin and pretend to be a mannequin too. Try to hold the same position for as long as possible.

96. Start singing oldies songs in the megaphone.

97. Ask everyone in "Electronics" "Do you know what CD this song is on? I don't know the name but it goes like this:". Then sing loudly, and don't stop until somebody throws you out.

98. Bark while trying on dog collars. Have a friend lead you around on a leash. Better yet, whinny while trying on horse tack and a friend holds the reins.

99. Take fishing rods & a fishing hat from Sporting Goods to the Pet Department. Pretend to fish in the goldfish tanks.

Copy and paste the list if you are planning to do one or more of that!

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile. (I would do that, when I'm l'm playing games.)

If you are anti-social sometimes copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile. (Record: 2 hours straight, before got busted by mum for using the computer for more than 3 hours straight.)

If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.

~Things I will not do in the Mushroom Kingdom...

1. I will not tell Bowser that he's the evolved form of a squirtle. (You're kidding me, right?)

2. I will not scream BOWSER at the top of my lungs in the middle of Toad Square.

3. I will not eat a peach in front of Peach's face nor will I destroy a daisy in front of Daisy.

4. I will not tell goombas that Mario is going to get them in their sleep.

5. I will not eat a mushroom in front of Toad.

6. I will not ask Mario how Rosalina is doing nor will I ask Daisy how things are going with Mr. L.

7. I will not shout THE GREEN THUNDER or any of his "other" catch phrases in front of Luigi's face.

8. I will not hum the super man theme song when I use the star power up that grants you the ability to fly.

9. I will not hum the Mario Bros. theme song while walking around the Mushroom Kingdom.

10. I will not ask Mario if the Great Gonzales is planning to make a comeback any time soon.

11. It is not acceptable to serve Koopasta to a Koopa-Troopa.

12. I will not have a simile-making contest with Dimentio. (Metaphor contests are still allowed and answers can be given in soliloquies.)

13. I will not tell Fawful I know where the Dark Star is.

14. I will not tell Fawful that the Dark Star is underneath Dimentio's hat.

15. I will not tell Fawful that Dimentio is more insane than he is after informing the Dark Star is underneath his hat.

16. I will not push Bowser and Mario when they are mad at each other inside of Luigi's Haunted Mansion and bet on who destroys the mansion first from fighting.

17. I will not lock Luigi without his Poltergust 3000 inside of Luigi's Haunted Mansion just to see him run around like mad.

18. I will not order Mr. L to insult Dimentio's face just to make obsessive fangirls mad.

19. I will not compare Bowser Jr. to 'Mini-Me' in front of Bowser.

20. I will not question the logic of the Mario-Verse.

21. I will not steal Ludwig's piano and sell it on eBay to obsessive fangirls. (*Clicks Tab button*)

22. I cannot give Geno to Pinocchio's father.

23. I will not eat Mallow no matter how much he looks like a yummy marshmellow

24. Do not give Vivian, Goombella, Ms. Mowz, or Flurrie love-letters that are falsely addressed from Mario.

25. Also, don't send love-letters falsely addressed from Luigi to Princess Éclair.

26. It is impossible to convince Pennington that 'Luigi' is actually Mario. (Funny how Pennington is the only character in any RPG that actually remembers Luigi's name. But I bet Luigi's pretty ticked that Pennington only remembers his name while looking at Mario.)

27. It is also impossible to convince Pennington that he stinks when it comes to solving crimes.

28. Nimbi people are not Canadians from South Park.

29. I will not use 'faucet-face' as an insult to the Mario Bros.

30. I will not quote from old Super Mario World episodes. (Aw c'mon. They were at least better than SMSS.)

31. I will not speak of the live-action Super Mario Bros. Movie. (OH PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GRAMBI NO.)

32. I cannot name a Piranha Plant Steve.

33. I cannot name Piranha Plants ever.

34. I will not give the location of Luvbi's prince to Luvbi.

35. I will not tell Beldam and Marylin that Vivian is better than both of them. No matter how true it is.

36. I will not sing the SMRPG song every time I walk through Geno's Forest. (...When I play the game I get lost in a phase, Then I find out I'M STUCK IN GENO'S MAZE!!!)

37. I will not do the things listed in '10 Ways To Tick Dimentio Off.'

38. I will not record Dimentio's reaction after doing the things listed in '10 Ways To Tick Dimentio Off.' (BUT YOU JUST SAID YOU WOULDN'T EVEN DO THEM!!!)

39. I will not lie to Waluigi and say that he has more fangirls than his rival.

40. I will not refer to eating shrooms and getting refreshing herbs as 'getting high.' (Please refer to rule #20.)

41. I will not point out the fact to the characters that people write stories about them every day.

42. I will not put their reactions on YouTube after pointing out the fact that people write stories about them every day.

44. I will not insult the Koopa Bros. about being copies of The Mutant Ninja Turtles.

45. I will never make fun of Luigi for cross dressing. (... no comment...)

46.I will not introduce guns and atomic bombs to Bowser's army. (HOLY SHOOT NO!!!)

47. I will not set fire to Mario in paper form.

48. Mr. L and Luigi in the same place at the same time does not mean that there is a time paradox. It's the end of the world.

49. Do not feed the fangirls. (That includes me. :D)

50. I will not tell Toadsworth that he will never find a girlfriend.

51. I will not pull a spike off of Bowser's shell and use it to pick my teeth. (Um...I'm pretty sure that would hurt a bit...)

52. It is considered rude to steal the Koopalings' wands.

53. I will copy and paste this to my profile to inform everyone.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever misspelled "the" on either your keyboard, or a paper, or both, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love FANFICTION.NET, add your name and copy and paste this into your profile. Rainstorm007, mysterys, Adderstar, BlackwolfJaganshilover, Shadowess 88, Bluefirelily, Steel Scale, AnimeMixDJ,Blackmoon OniOokami, AcroPrincess, Icefox425, Pinkdesi101, ScarletPies

Mario Stuff:

Luigi and Daisy are sitting in the park. The latter looks to the skies and then the sun, wondering of the future of herself and her companion. After shuffling and trying to spit out some words, Daisy finally speaks her mind.

"Luigi, do I ever cross your mind?"

"No."

"Do you like me?"

"No."

"Do you want me?"

"No."

"Would you cry if I left?"

"No."

"Would you live for me?"

"No."

"Would you do anything for me?"

"No."

"Choose -- Me or your life."

"My life."

Daisy, utterly surprised, scoffs and starts to run off. Luigi starts to smile a bit and drops the shenanigan.

"The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind."

Daisy looks over her shoulder and sees Luigi, who walks closer and puts and arm around her.

"The reason why I don't like you is because I love you."

"The reason why I don't want you is because I need you."

"The reason why I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left."

"The reason why I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you."

"The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you."

"The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life."

Daisy starts to grin. Luigi played a risky little game, though a playful punch to the arm did little to hamper the smile on the plumber's face.

Copy and paste this onto your profile if you are a true Luaisy fan!)

That ends my loooooong profile. (Planning to add on more stuff!)