krzykatldy
 Author has written 2 stories for Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Friend's: Lol that was toke forever. For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.) -Be OPTIMISTIC... all the people you hate are eventually going to die!! -Sometimes I Wonder, "Why is that Frisbee getting bigger?" and then it hits me!! -Boys: can’t live with 'em, and it’s illegal to shoot 'em. -What happens if you get scared half to death... twice? -Heh. I'm looking forward to regretting this -Life is like a pack of chewing-gum; I've yet to figure out why -I have PMS and a gun... now what were you saying? -A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME, LETS DO IT AGAIN!!" -They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people. Maybe of laughter... -It's always the last place you look. Of course it is. Why the heck would I keep looking after I found it? -When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and watch as the world wonders how the fuck you did it. -When life hands you a lemon, squirt life in the eye and run like hell. -Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run away. He hates that. -When life gives you lemons, throw them back at the jerk who gave 'em to ya and demand chocolate. -When life gives you lemons, ask for sugar and call me over. -When Life hands you lemons, start a food fight and make Life regret it. -Friends are like stars, although you may not always see them, they're always there. -Everyone has a wild side--me and my friends just prefer to make them public -There is no "I" in team but the is an "I" in PIE and there is an "I" in MEATPIE and MEAT is an anagram of TEAM... -EMO=Extravagantly Made Origami -Labels are for cans. And in case you haven't noticed--I'm not a can. -Normal is just a setting on washing machines. -"The dinosaur’s extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide." -"Doctors say I have multiple personality disorder. We disagree with that." -Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldn’t they be more specific and say "employees of this place only"? -Trying is the first step toward failure. -When you get caught looking at his girlfriend, just remember, she was looking back. And he was glaring. -You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it. -I'm the kind of girl who will burst our laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday. -Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss. -If you are a serial killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM ME. If you are a cereal killer, GET THE HECK AWAY FROM MY CHERRIOS. From a girl that realizes said things and has had the roll reversal of being so for a guy; I'm sorry that I bought you roses to tell you that I like you I'm sorry That I was raised with respect not to sleep with you when you were drunk I'm sorry That my body's not ripped enough to "satisfy" your wants I'm sorry that I open your car door, and pull out your chair like I was raised I'm sorry That I'm not cute enough to be "your guy" I'm sorry That I am actually nice; not a jerk I'm sorry I don't have a huge bank account to buy you expensive things I'm sorry I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling with you, instead of at a club I'm sorry I would rather make love to you then just screw you like some random guy. I'm sorry That I am always the one you need to talk to, but never good enough to date I'm sorry That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car, but when we went out you went home with another guy I'm sorry That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere, but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend I'm sorry If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around I'm sorry If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work I'm sorry that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along I'm sorry If you read this and know somebody like this but don't care But most of all I'm sorry For not being sorry anymore I'm sorry That you can't accept me for who I am I'm sorry I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good enough to make it in your world. I'm sorry I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for... I'm sorry That I told you I loved you and actually meant it. I'm sorry That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family I'm sorry That I cared I'm sorry that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different. Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?" Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you. If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry' If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile. FRIENDS Lend you their umbrella BEST FRIENDS Take yours and say 'RUN BITCH RUN!' FRIENDS Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS Would be sitting next to you saying "THAT WAS FRICKING AWESOME" FRIENDS Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... FRIENDS Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you FRIENDS Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS Already know not to tell. FRIENDS Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) BEST FRIENDS Are for life. FRIENDS Will comfort you when the guy rejects you BEST FRIENDS Will go up to him and say "It's because you're gay isn't it?" FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall. BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?" FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you. FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in. FRIENDS: Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies. FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!" FRIENDS: Would read and ignore this. BEST FRIENDS: Will re-post this crap! Ways to Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down. 2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice. 3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In." 5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso. 6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For Smuggling Diamonds" 7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the Prophecy." 8. Don't use any punctuation 9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk. 10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify that your Drive-thru order is "to go." 12. Sing along at the Opera. 13. Go to a poetry recital and ask "Why don't the poems rhyme?" 14. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day. 15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood. 16. Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, "Rock Bottom". 17. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won!, I won!" 18. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling "Run for your lives, they're loose!!" 19. Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go." 20. And the final way to keep a healthy level of insanity... Copy and paste this onto your profile! A girl and her boyfriend were speeding over 150kmp/h on a motorcycle Girl: "Slow down, I'm scared!" Guy: "No, this is fun." Girl: "No, it's not. Please, I'm scared." Guy: "Then tell me you love me." Girl: "I love you, now slow down!" Guy: "Now give me a big hug." She gives him a big hug* Guy: "Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself? It's bothering me." In the newspaper the next day: A motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that, halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working, but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this into your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love. Girls I was walking around Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The cashier said, ' I'm sorry but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.' Then the little boy turned to the old women next to him: "Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. 'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.' I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.' His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.' Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.' 'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.' Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. 'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!' Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'' 'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' 'My mommy loves white roses.' A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message, or 2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart. |
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