95% of teens would cry if they saw Miley Cyrus at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this onto your profile if you are in the 5% that would sit there eating popcorn and yelling "Do a flip bitch!!"

If random songs pop into your head for no apparent reason, copy and paste this on your profile. I think its the people in my head singing, annoying when that happens huh?

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

93% of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7% who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" copy this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to fucking slap someone, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.

If you have ever stayed up past 2 in the morning reading, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

I understand that scissors can beat paper and i get how rock can beat scissors but there is no way paper can beat rock. Is paper supposed to magically wrap around rock leaving it immobile? If so why cant paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors why cant paper do this to people? Why aren’t sheets of college ruled paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? Ill tell you why because paper cant beat anyone! A rock would tear that shit up in two seconds. When i play rock paper scissors I will always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say oh shit I’m sorry I thought paper would protect you!

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile

I read a profile that told me that if any of these things apply to me, then put them on my profile. So of course I had to do it.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS :)

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"

24 Things I owe to my Mother

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

"If you two are going to kill each other, at least do it outside. I just finished cleaning!"

2. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week."

3. My mother taught me LOGIC.

"Because I said so, that's why."

4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.

"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you aren't coming to the store with me!"

5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.

"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.

6. My mother taught IRONY.

"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

7. My mother taught me about THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS.

"Shut your mouth and eat your supper!"

8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

"Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!"

9. My mother taught me about STAMINA.

"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

10. My mother taught me about WEATHER.

"Your room looks like a tornado went through there!"

11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.

"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!"

12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it too!"

13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.

"Stop acting like your father!"

14. My mother taught me about ENVY.

"There are millions of less fortunate children around the world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"

15. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.

"Just wait until we get home!"

16. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.

"You're going to get it when we get home!"

17. My mother taught me about MEDICAL SCIENCE.

"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way!"

18. My mother taught me about ESP.

"Put your sweater on! Don't you think I know when you're cold?"

19. My mother taught me HUMOR.

"When the lawnmower cuts off you toes, don't come crying to me!"

20. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

21. My mother taught me GENETICS.

"You're just like your father."

22. My mother taught me about MY ROOTS.

"Shut that door! Do you think you were raised in a barn?"

23. My mother taught me WISDOM.

"When you're my age, you'll understand."

24. My mother taught me JUSTICE.

"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

List of things that everyone knows about me:

1. I'm insane.

2. I love stereotypes (Well sometimes)

3. I love gay jokes, though I i'm not a homophobe. I just find them funny as hell.

4. I love musicc

5. I hate cats. (those sneaky ass bastards)

6. I suffer from extreme paranoia.

7. I have an explosive temper.

8. I hate school. (School is a prison made by the governement to keep teens from doing something cool with their lives)

9. I hate shopping (no words can describe the terror I feel when my mom comes into my room and says..."Honey, come try on these clothes. It will only take a minute.")

10. I will never ever wear a dress willingly.

11. I'm a genuine game freak.

12. I love Anime and Manga (Sasuke can lick ass, Naruto is and will always be, better than him.)

The ones in bold are true about me.

YOUR GUY SIDE:

~You love hoodies.

~You love jeans.

~ Dogs are better than cats

~It's hilarious when people get hurt.

~You've played with/against boys on a team.

~Shopping is torture.

~Sad movies suck.

~You own/ed somesort of gaming device.

~Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.

~At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.

~You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.

~You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.

~You watch sports on TV.

~Gory movies are cool.

~You go to your dad for advice.

~You own like a trillion baseball caps.

~You like going to high school football games.

~You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.

~Baggy pants are cool to wear.

~It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.

~Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.

~You love to go crazy and not care what people think.

~Sports are fun

~Talk with food in your mouth.

~Sleep with your socks on at night

Total= 17

YOUR GIRL SIDE:

~You wear lip gloss

~You love to shop.

~You wear eyeliner.

~You wear the color pink

~Go to your mom for advice.

~You consider cheerleading a sport (me: competitive cheerleading actually is, just cheering on the sidelines isn't)

~You hate wearing the color black

~You like hanging out at the mall.

~You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.

~You like wearing jewelry.

~Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe

~Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies

~You don't like the movie Star Wars.

~You were/are in gymnastics/dance

~It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up

~You smile a lot more than you should.

~You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.

~You care about what you look like.

~You like wearing dresses when you can.

You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.

~You love the movies.

~Used to play with dolls as little kid.

~Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.

~Like being the star of every thing

Total= 3

If you don't have a problem with Homosexuality copy this into your profile

U know you live in 2009 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password into the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace/Live Messenger/Facebook.

4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

8. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

9. You were too busy to notice number five.

10. You actually look to check if there was a number five.

11. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.

12. Repost if you fell for it. You know you did

Month one

Mommy I am only 8 inches long but I have all my oragans. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Month two

Mommy today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me you could definetly tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.

Month three

You know what Mommy I am a boy!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want to make you happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad, It makes me sad too. and I even cry with you even though you can hear me.

Month four

Mommy my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine but I will have alot of it. I spen alot of time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month five

You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. Mommy, what's an abortion?

Month six

I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor calls it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus' arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why din't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just...

One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak.

If you are against abortion, re-post this.

My name is Tiffany

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe ill just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is tiffany

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

And you can help

Sickens me top the soul,

And if you read this

and don’t pass it on

I pray for your forgiveness

Because you would have to be

One heartless person

To not be effected

By this Poem

And because you are effected,

Do something about it!

So all i ask you to do

Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE