![]() Holaaaaa~ Bienveidos a la mi pagina. Me gustan gatos~ Favorite Quotes (Everyone else does it...) "I couldn't return... Byakuya-sama's love. I am sorry. Being with Byakuya-sama for the past five years... was like a dream come true for me... Byakuya-sama..." ~Hisana "That's the man you have been in my heart, Ichigo" ~Rukia "Thank you, Rukia. Thanks to you, I think... the rain has stopped." ~Ichigo "I remember now... the reason why I wanted to save you so much." ~Ichigo "What is that? What would I see if I cracked open your chest? If I broke open your skull what would I see? You humans say the word so easily. Just like-- Oh I get it. This is it it. This here in my hand. The heart." ~Ulquiorra before dying "The rain drags black sun down, but the rain dried by white moon" ~Kubo-sensei "When snow melts, what does it become?" ~Kana "Buddy the Elf, whats your favorite color?" ~Buddy from Elf “Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.” ~Anonymous “Forget what you want. Remember what you deserve.”~Anonymous “They didn’t agree on much. In fact, they rarely agreed on anything. They fought all the time and they challenged each other every day. But despite their differences, they had one important thing in common: they were crazy about each other.”~Anonymous Favorite Anime/Manga (not in order) Bleach Random Copy and Paste thingies~! ~JOIN THE ICHIRUKI PARADE~ SPREAD LOVE THE ICHIRUKI WAY. If you believe that Ichigo and Rukia are meant for each other, paste this in your profile. If you believe that Black Sun is meant for White Moon, paste this in your profile. If you believe that Rukia belongs to Ichigo and Ichigo belongs to Rukia, paste this in your profile. If you believe that they are perfect for each other, paste this in your profile. If you believe that they love each other, paste this is your profile. If you do not believe in IchiHime, paste this in your profile. If you hate IchiHime, paste this in your profile. If you believe that IchiRuki shall prevail, paste this in your profile. IF YOU LOVE ICHIRUKI, PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE! ~ICHIRUKI IS LOVE. BITTER OR SWEET, IT SCREAMS: LOVE!~ Copy and paste this into your profile if you love cats as much as Sebastian Copy and paste this into your profile if you stuff kitties in your closet like Sebastian Did you know... Kissing is healthy. Bananas are good for period pain. It’s good to cry. Chicken soup actually makes you feel better. 94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers. Lying is actually unhealthy. You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes. It’s actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you. 89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move. It’s impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed. Chocolate will make you feel better. Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing. A good friend never judges. A good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any. Boys aren't worth your tears. We all love surprises. Now... make a wish. Wish REALLY hard!! WISH WISH WISH WISH! Your wish has just been received. Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and... Your wish will be granted. Copy and Paste this into you're profile if you've every pulled on a door that said push, or vise versa. (I do this everyday.) You know you live in 2009 when... 1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave. 2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years. 3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or myspace. 4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV. 6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job. 7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling. 8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends. 9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5 isn't there. 10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5. 11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly. 12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did. If you have ever said that an anime character is sexy and you love them and you mean it, copy and paste this into your profile If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumb war with yourself. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile. If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell down for no apparent reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile. Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile. I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile! If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the frick'n trix, copy and paste this into your profile. (Honestly! All he wants is a little bit of sugary cereal and/or yogurt-though the cereal is soooo much better.) If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever been pushed into an ice-cold pool copy and paste this into your profile The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile. If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile! If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile. Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile! If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.(So me) If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.(BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!) If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile. If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.(24/7, exceptions are eating, sleeping, going to the bathroom, or ignoring my parents yelling at me to get off of the computer) If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile 98 percent of teens can walk without running into walls. If you're in the 2 percent that can't, post this in your profile. 98 of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2 that CAN resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile. If random songs just pop into your head at any given moment, from 'I've Been Working On the Railroad' to the Animorphs' version of the Barney Song (I hate you, you hate me, we're an alien family...), to your most favorite song ever, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you think rainbows are wonderful, post this in your profile If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile. If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile. If you think the world would be easier if everyone was on fanfiction.net because--judging from the copy-paste thingys in the profiles--everyone dares to be different and doesn't care what people think, post this in your profile. If you randomly check your email every five minutes while on the computer, copy this into your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile. Stereotypes suck! Copy, paste & add. 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright Until you hear them speak. 2. He who laughs last thinks slowest. 3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. 4. Those that live by the sword get shot by those who don't. 5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool. 6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something Right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong. 7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be Stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the Fog. 8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. 9. The things that come to those who wait, will be the things left by those Who got there first? 10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he Will sit in a boat all day drinking beer. 11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries. 12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room. 13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well. 14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of Jury duty Tell the truth and run. All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative. When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear. Education is important, school however, is another matter. "Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?" Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’? Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from cocoa Please Note: The difference between friends and best friends F: Never asks for food or drink BF: Is the reason your fridge is empty F:Bail you out of jail BF: In the next cell saying "Damn we messed up, again!" F:Only knows a few things about you. BF: Is writing a embarrassing biography you don't know about as we speak. F:Knocks on the door. BF:Comes in saying "I'm Hoooooome" I have a name, an age, a gender and a religion, If you have no life, enjoy anime too much, and people tell you you have no life, put this in your profile How To Tell If You're a good writer: -If you talk to yourself. 98 percent of the teenage of population would drop dead if Abercombie and Finch told them it wasn't cool to breath. Repost this in your profile if you are part of the 2 percent of the population that would live on laughing 92 percent of the teenage population has smoked, done drugs, drank alcohol, or done all three. Repost this if you are part of the 8 percent that hasn't If you're a die-hard IchiRuki lover for life copy and paste this into your profile- Ichiruki lovers unite! My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile. If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile. Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile If you believe that over half of all you say/write/think doesn't come out right and is complete stupidity, copy and paste this into your profile. If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer. If you are getting tired of this extremely long profile, copy and paste this in your profile. If you think that I'm making you think too much then copy this onto your profile. If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever run into a door copy this into your profile If there are times when you wanna annoy people, just for the heck of it, copy and paste this to your profile. "FUUDDGGEEE!!" ...I like apples. If you like being random copy and paste this in your profile. If you have/had a scary crush on a book, anime, or game character, then copy and post this into your profile. If you sometimes look at a ad/pamphlet/brochure/etc, point and go, "Aha! A grammar mistake!" copy and paste this in your profile. If you think that Writer's Block blows, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever spent a long amount of time looking for something that you were holding/wearing, copy this to your profile If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile You've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy and paste this onto your profile If you believe teenagers are steryotyped, put this on your profile. If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile. If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects...copy this into your profile. If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile If you don't do drugs (They are nasty), copy/paste this into your profile. There is nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE then it's weird. If you agree, copy this and paste it in your profile. A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know ands wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever asked a really obvious, stupid question, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not, copy and paste this into your profile. If you want to learn Japanese, copy/paste this into your profile. If you think fighting is fun, but war is pointless, copy this into your profile. THIS ISN'T A JOKE! IT ACTUALLY HELPS YOU FIGURE OUT A COUPLE OF KEY THINGS! Either grab a writing utensil and a piece of paper or just remember your answers. Apparently Don't peek at the answers, because it ruins it. 1) If you are strait write the first name of a person of the opposite sex that pops into you head. If your gay, write the name of the person of the same sex that pops into your head. If you bi, than write the name of the first person that pops into your head... (it has to be the first) 2) What is you favorite color out of red,black,blue,green,yellow? 3) Your first initial? 4) Your month of birth? 5) Which color do you like more,black or white? 6) Name a person of the same sex as yours. 7) Your favorite number? 8) Do you like California or Florida more? 9) Do you like the lake or the ocean more? 10) Write down a wish(a realistic one) ARE YOU DONE? IF SO SCROLL DOWN. (DON'T CHEAT...FOOL...) THE ANSWERS; 1. You are completely in love with this person. 2. If you choose: Red-You are alert and you life is full of love. Black-You are conservative and aggressive Green-Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back Blue-You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love. Yellow-You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down. 3.If you initial is: A-K You have alot of love and friendship in your life. L-R You try to live you life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom. S-Z You like to help others and your future love life looks very good. 4.If you were born in: Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you will fall in love with someone totally unexpected. April-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last very long but the memories will last forever. July-Sept: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good. Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate. 5.If you choose; Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change. White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it. 6. This person is your best friend. 7. This is how many close friends you will have in your lifetime. 8. If you choose: California: You like adventure Florida: You are a laid back person 9.If you choose: Lake: You are loyal to your friends and to you love. And you are very reserved. Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people. 10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday If you love snow, copy and paste this on your profile If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile If you have ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes copy this on your profile If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you were going to say it copy this on your profile If you have ever thrown something at a TV screen when you saw a character you despised, copy and paste this on your profile If you have ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head against a desk for no reason copy this on your profile If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile If you hate those mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy and paste this on your profile If you have been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing copy this on your profile If you have ever crashed into a wall while sugar high copy and paste this on your profile If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination put this on your profile If, with no warning, laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, copy this on your profile If you have no life, enjoy anime too much, and people tell you you have no life, put this in your profile If you KNOW IchiRuki is awesome, copy and paste this on your profile If you are overly obsess over anime and your friends thinks it's weird, paste this on your profile If you love Byakuya so much and squeel your head off making your friend beside you half deaf, copy and paste this on you profile If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile. If you are addicted to ninjas and would like to become one, post this onto your profile. If you have ever pretended to be a ninja and gotten hurt, post this onto you profile i did this and threw a "ninja star" (marker) at my sis xP If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile. If you ran up a down escalater copy this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile. If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile! I don't suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute of it. You're jealous cuz the voices in my head talk to me and not you. No tresspasing, violaters will be shot and survivors will be shot again. It takes 47 muscles to frown, 17 to smile but it doesn't take any to sit there with a dumb look on your face. If you always stop to smell the roses sooner or later you'll inhale a bee. If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk! I am worse than evil... I am the author!! The evening news always starts off by saying Good Evening and then procede to tell you exactly why it isn't. He who laughs last thinks the slowest. There are 3 kinds of people, those who make it happen, those who watch it happen and those who don't know what the heck is happening. People are boring, they are only amusing if you push them down a flight of stairs. When life gives you lemons make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it. I AM NOT CRAZY! My reality is just different than yours. My imaginary friend thinks you have mental problems. I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me, he said I was being ridiculous, everyone hasn't met me yet. When life gives you lemons squeeze them in somebody's eyes and RUN! If you are reading this then step 1 of my EVIL PLAN is complete. When life gives you lemons, think of another 'when life gives you lemons' quote. Girls 26 Things That A Perfect Guy Would Do 1... Know how to make you smile when you are down 2. Try to secretly smell your hair , but you always notice. 3. Stick up for you, but still respects your independence 4. Give you the remote control during the game 5. Come up behind you and put his arms around you 6. Play with your hair 7. His hands always find yours 8. Be cute when he really wants something. 9. Offer you plenty of massages 10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork 11. Never run out of love 12. Be funny , but know how to be serious 13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be serious 14. Be patient when you take forever to get ready. 15. React so cutely when you hit him and it actually hurts 16. Smile a lot 17. Plans a romantic date full of cheesy things he wouldn't normally like to do, just because he knows it means a lot to you. 18. Appreciate you. 19. Help others out. 20. Drive 5 hours just to see you for 1 21. Always gives you a peck on the cheek when you depart from each others company, even when his friends are watching. 22. Sing , even if he can't. 23. Have a creative sense of humor 24. Stare at you. 25. Call for no reason 26.. Quit smoking, chewing, drinking, or drugs - just because he loves u that much to quit it. To Every Girl: To every girl that is SCARED to To every girl that has been To every girl that To every girl who To every girl that will spend her To every girl who gets her heart To every girl that would die To every girl who would just once To every girl that cries at night To every girl that won't get To every girl that To every girl that To every girl who To every girl who would just To every girl who To every girl who lies To every girl that To every girl that To every girl who shows how much To every girl that thought To every girl that laughs at stupid stuff To every girl who is just To every girl that doesn't want To every girl who wants To every girl that fell for all the lies To every girl that gave her heart away To every girl that has faith that I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights. We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. We are the couple who had the Realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men. I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. Repost this if you believe homophobia is wrong. If you have never tried drug, or under-age drinking, or any other bad thing that most people (like me) consider a huge NO-NO...you are awesome. (not saying that if you do any of the things above, that you're totally an person with no morals or personal view.) and post this to your page. If your pet, friend's pet, or your friend has every done some wired things like let's say ran across your key bored and made the address thing at the top of the page disappear until your little mouse thing activates it...post this to your page. If you and another person or just you, have had a random laughing fit for a long numeral period...post this to your page. If you have ever A) ran into a glass door, B) tripped over anything and nothing, C) tried to open the door that says pull and you push, or D) fell over backwards on a chair WHILE you were still sitting on it...post this to your page. 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile 92 of teens have moved on to rap music. if you're prat of the 8 that still rock out every day, copy this to your profile. 95 percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile. If you're easily confussed or confuzzled add this to you're profile If you like making these copy and paste thingies copy and paste this onto your profile. If you love cute, wittle, insy-tinsy puppies and kittens copy and paste this onto your profile. If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile. Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile. If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile. If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. If you have ever laughed while drinking (or eating) and snorted you drink or food out your nose, copy and paste this into your profile! If you don't use Myspace and are proud enough to make it public, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ran up/down a down/up escalator copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN copy this into your profile If you've ever walked into a wall copy this into your profile If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list! Died my hair Orange for school picture day, jumped off a roof on a broomstick, skateboarded off a roof, got knocked out by a piece of paper, put a pizza in my closet and forget about for weeks, deciding to go rock climbing then deciding WHEN I WAS ON THE WALL that i was afraid of heights If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile. wowlookatthisimtypingthisveryoddlinebreakifyoucanreaditcopyandpasteyousmartperson Just because we eat animals for food doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! Did you know that to get the fur, they club, drown, and anal electrocute the poor animals? And why are they so cruel? Because they don't want to ruin the furs! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc. copy this into your profile If you've ever tried to spoon broth into your mouth with a FORK! copy and paste this into you profile I laugh in the face of death...maybe not laugh more like a snicker...a quiet snicker, and I wouldn't do it directly in death's face so, it's more like a quiet snicker behind death's back. ╔╦╦╦╗Post this In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)? On a bar o f Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...) On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion). On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?) On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) 20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In". 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds". 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy". 8. Don't use any punctuation. 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go". 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme? 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." 20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity . Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile! Everything I Learned in Life, I Learned From CLAMP A little boy was overhead saying the prayer, "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma, and good-bye Grandpa." The next day the grandfather died of a heart attack. A few weeks later, he said the prayer, "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, and good-bye Grandma." The next day, the grandma was hit by a bus. She died without feeling a thing. A few weeks later, the boy said, "God bless Mommy and good-bye Daddy." His father, of course, spent the rest of the next day panicking. His normally 10-minute drive to work took 45 minutes because he was being so extra cautious. When he got home from work, his wife said, "Honey, isn't this weird? The milkman dropped dead at the door this morning." I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you. Mental Hospital Answering Machine “Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline. -./l、 -Nya If you were ever watching a movie and randomly screamed "THEY'RE SO GAY FOR EACH OTHER" at the main male characters, copy and paste this into your profile. 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of 3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. " Because I said so, that's why." 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, 7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying, and I'll give you something 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA"You'll sit there until all that 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. " There are millions of less 16 My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing 19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll What to do in an elevator 1. Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!" How to annoy someone These are some really funny things that you do to a pizza guy when you're ordering/paying. 1.Do not introduce self as roleplaying character in public. 2.Do not talk to fictional characters in public. 3.Do not answer fictional characters in public. 4. Do not talk to inanimate objects in public 5. Do not go out in public. 6. Disregard above note.Perform numbers 1 to 4. 7.Note expressions. 8.Don't die alone. Take many people with you. 9.Floor is slippery when wet. 10.Lake is slippery when dry. 11.Only talk to strangers you know. 12.Strangers you don't know are spies... Kill them all. 13.For legal purposes be sure to delete above note. 14.Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you. 15.Kill them for security purposes. 16.Crying does not solve anything. Try violent mood swings. 17.Make a scene whenever humanly possible. 18.The men in white coats are not your friends. 19.Ask them for a room with lots of sharp, pointy objects. 20.When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket. 21.Chicken soup, although good for colds, is not the best cure for drowning. 22.Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing. 23.Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age. 24.Always remember, um... um... Crap 25.Train army of flying monkeys. 26.Goldfish don't like milk. 27.Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits. 28.Find out who invented the word "pianoist". 29.People are staring at you. 30.So act insane. 31.People are weird, but not as weird as me. 32.Do not taunt animals at zoo. They have feelings... And teeth. 33.Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people. 34.Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experiance. Do this as much as possible. 35.You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry. It's only me... Bonding. 36.Never pet a burning dog. 37.Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you are wearing a parka. 38.Naked men dig parkas. 39.Beware the naked man who offers you his parka. 40.You know what would look good on you? 41.Immolated cockroaches. 42.Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug. 43.The size of Danny DeVito. 44.Making an amusing facial expression. Like this. O~O 45.Numbers are evil. Count in clovers. 46.Stalking is fun. Do it more. 47.Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree!" 48.No matter what anyone says, there is a way to get to your fantasy world. 49.That way is rum. 50.Constipated people don't give a sh-t. 52.You cannot kill the snow. 53.The snow can kill you. 54.Grass can also kill you. 55.The leprechaun on the cereal box said I can't get his lucky charms... 56.Catch and castrate leprechaun. 57.HE is real... No matter what the men in white coats say. 58.Staple paper in the middle of the page. 59.In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally. 60.You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that. 61.Pretend to be so around teh n00bs. 62.Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul sucking demon. 63.Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway? 64.Ask Senior Diablo for a bigger pitchfork. 65.Remember to kill HIM... 66.Tell the small children in Toys 'R' Us that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood. 67.Note reactions. Avoid parents. 68.The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory. 69.Scream, the doctors don't like it, they'll give you a shot of something nice. 70.Hide the bodies, otherwise peole ask embarressing questions. 71.Eat the evidence. 72.But not if it's broken glass. 73.When in the presence of someone much wiser than you, point in a random direction and yell, "Look, a distraction!" Then run. 74.Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats kids. 75.Disregard last note. 76.Note reactions. 77.On average, 100 people choke to death on ball point pens every year. 78.Stock up on ball point pens. 79.Learn to fly. Tell no one. 80.The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing. 81.Do not stick fingers into blender. 82.Blender... Bad... Ouch. 83.Blood loss is bad. 84.Find way to re-attatch fingers. 85.Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM. 86.Answer every question with a question. 87.Ask people what gender they are. 88.Note reactions. 89.Refer to people as "mortal". 90.The Seagull From Hell is out to get me. 91.Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible. 92.Start by drowning them in fire ants. 93.Find the creators of pop-up messages. 94.Kill them. 95.Brutally. 96.Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination. 97.Dunk head in boiling water. 98.Disregard last note. Was written by Voice #7. 99.Gullible IS written on the ceiling! 100.Investigate this whole "critical mass" thing when the klaxon dies down... |
The Prince and I by BluechanXD reviews
When Spring Rain turns to Summer Sky by Rukazaya reviews
Handle With Care by MistressKiko reviews
Nyande ya ne? by mynKitska reviews
Distortion by hottee39 reviews
God With A Crush by Sunshine Depression reviews
Sorry, Shizuchan! by Joukaa Saikuron reviews
Sinful Attraction by TiRaMiSuLoVeR reviews
Daddy Daycare by Karrissarella reviews
Get Out of my Bed by flower-strike reviews
Yours by Kyogou reviews
ICHINOSE TOKIYA: The Owner's Guide And Manual by Ittoki Otoya reviews
Anonymous by Navigate Me reviews
Things Change by Beyond Birthday's Apprentice
Why He Likes Chocolate by PrincessDystopia reviews
King of His Hearts by Hitsugi Zirkus reviews
It'll Last Longer by Hitsugi Zirkus reviews
Heat by Cocoa Mocha reviews
The Let's Kill Claude Request Center by starspot reviews
Chasing Cars on a Ski Hill by UnlockmyHeartforLife reviews
Kurokyoushi by PT-chan ssu reviews
Revenge is definitely sweet by mynKitska reviews
Differing Opinions by cydonic reviews
A Life Drift by snowpaum reviews
Are You Nervous Yet? by DarkCrimsonShadowBlossom reviews
Passing Notes by Dinosaurs Fly reviews
The Problem With Dedicating Songs by AvedlyTres reviews
The Difference by XxMikomiAixX reviews
Flowers By Your Bed by DokiDouble reviews
Turning Purple by Fyreborne reviews
Reversal of Sorts by Zenelly reviews
Five Times Fai Gets Owned By a Tree by GreenAppleIce reviews
Will you by XxMikomiAixX reviews
Voices by Moon's-Wing reviews
It's enough by AsikIkisa reviews
Dancing by Saki Toyo reviews
Damage by weirdcoffeeholic reviews
Oh! by Brokenx3Dreams reviews
I'll Be Around the Corner by Soffie101 reviews
What you deserve by TrueDespair reviews
Don't touch my DVR by LovelyBlood reviews
Sanctum by The Guardian White Wolf reviews
Pi Face's Zetta Wonderful Maths Class by Frog-kun reviews
The Pocky Game by UnderTheGrave reviews
Never, Almost, Always by XxMikomiAixX reviews
Poetic Device by Aphel Aura reviews
Locked Away by ThePattyWagon reviews
Love Sick by thirteen-forty-two reviews
Gentle Downpour by TwWereWolf reviews
Gingerbread by Flying Pyro of Doom reviews
Behind Closed Doors by TheDarkWingedAngel reviews
Black Bird by thirteen-forty-two reviews
Sebastian Hatches a Plan by monkeybait reviews
Pie is Sexy by TreasuredNightmare reviews
My Obsession by Bizerko-Kittykins reviews
A Mistake by toganeshiro reviews
What We're Made Of by Sopheryl reviews
Ocean Eyes by kc creation reviews
Breakfast Challenged by Demons Dancer reviews
10 Seconds by adrynnXadrenaline reviews
Burn With Me, Hell is on Fire by Demons Dancer reviews
Butterflies by polarbearoncrack reviews
Prank Call by themusicalmuffin reviews
Your Logic Is Flawed by Winged Galaxy Dragon reviews
A Date to Prom by ShadowDragoon32 reviews
Green Eggs and Black Butlers by monkeybait reviews
Cure for the common cold by LovelyBlood reviews
Polar Opposites by KillerSockz reviews
Berry Balloons by RadioButtons reviews
Introduction by Faikitty reviews
Princess Haruhi and the rebel John Smith by walther-wolf reviews
Most Precious Person by Feather Ice reviews
Prom Night by MintyJoker reviews
Butterfly by ShingetsuXMangetsu reviews
The World Cup by orangish reviews
Rain rain by blacksakura13 reviews
The Epic Sock Journey by Emmychao reviews
Tamaki's Tutor by MhiaFujioka reviews
First Kiss by Zen Lion reviews
The Greatest Treasure by AznVKai reviews
Notebooks by blacksakura13 reviews
Shock by jxp7962 reviews
Outrageous by Airrei reviews
Yellow And Gold by momoxtoshiro reviews
Greetings, attractable female earthling by Mr.Biscuit reviews
Paranormal Harassment by Joker and the Thief reviews
Chocolate by BoxOfBirds reviews
Rukia's Twelve Days of Christmas by Ryu-Takehshi reviews
Food, Gifts, Manservant what? by Bloodypleasures reviews
Overreaction by bandgeek9 reviews
The IchiRuki Bet by DancingBuffy reviews
The Kitchen Incident by Spirit's Whisper reviews
Just A Taste by Spirit's Whisper reviews
SpeedingCars by DeadlyBeauty23 reviews
Swords and High School by YulieAna reviews
Life at Karakura High by missehri reviews
Rock This Town by NinjaMoose reviews
A Vacant Spark by Tovc reviews
Blind Tension by wintaer reviews
Don't bet with a demon by Lady Mugetsu reviews
Mashiro, the Watcher by I'm Bread reviews
Serendipity by arik122 reviews
Revenge Of The Kurotan by Spirit's Whisper reviews
The Corner Cafe by DeadlyBeauty23 reviews
Perfect Nightmare by Joukaa Saikuron reviews
Roller Skating Trip! by Joukaa Saikuron reviews
Daredevil by himawarixxsandz reviews
Why? by himawarixxsandz reviews
Fears by himawarixxsandz reviews
Love:dot:COM by Zapenbits reviews
24 Chips of Bone to Make a Mask to Hide the Truth by Tasogare-Taichou reviews
Hierarchy by Queen of Juiceboxes reviews