BillieMaysSaysKaboom
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Joined 06-24-09, id: 1982177, Profile Updated: 12-01-09
Author has written 3 stories for Girlbomb, Inheritance Cycle, and Parodies and Spoofs.

Hiya! I know I've got a long profile, so please bear with me! :)

I won't be writing for a while, sorry.

Some of the rights BILLIE MAYS has reserved:

I reserve the right to openly and enthusiasticaly express my opinions in any review.

I reserve the right to beta a story or not.

I reserve the right to update my profile and/or stories at any time without notice.

I reserve the right to message anybody I choose, and send them fanmail that has totally useless crap in it.

I reserve the right to not respond to any messages.

I reserve the right to update every single story except the ones that you love the most.

I reserve the right to not do anything on this site for several days/weeks simply because I'm not in the mood.

I reserve the right to accept PM messaging or not and to participate in PM messaging or not.

I reserve the right to post a review or not, discuss a story or not, abruptly leave a PM conversation, or start a PM converstion that has no point simply because I can.

I reserve the right to send someone a message that has apparantly no reason at any time. That includes wierd hours of the night...

I reserve the right to throw bottles of KABOOM and bottles of OXICLEAN at flamers and any person I dubb unpleasant or stalker-ish.

I reserve the right to make changes to these rights at any time without notice. (So you better keep checking this list once in a while)

I reserve the right to reserve my rights.

If you have a problem with any of the rights BILLIE MAYS has reserved, I suggest you "GET ON THE BALL WITH OXICLEAN!!"


If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

I'm currently not hyper (That may change...) and most definentely NOT hyper ALL THE TIME like a certain friend (coughcoughThreeBooksInTheFirecoughcough), but being hyper is a fun feeling!

If you believe that your OCs are better then anything the original writers could ever come up with, your OC is probably a Mary-Sue.

(If you agree with the above statement, copy and paste it into your profile.)


Now a little about BILLIE MAYS:

GENERAL DESCRIPTION:
Everyone seems to add this so I thought "oh what the hell"

Appearance: I stand at 5'6"...brown eyes that look black unless there's light shining on them...very dark brunette hair...I'm fat compared to over half the girls at my high school. ummm, I'm pretty much just an average freshman...

Age: It could be over 9,000...

Name: Some people call me "Kitty", most call me "Jello". One calls me "Kenyth" (something about a Nun and a BAGEL) for reasons unknown.
You could also call me Kathryn. Use any one of those, I really don't care.

Gender: I swear if you can't guess, I might just have to find you and kick your ass so hard you won't HAVE an ass left.

Bands/Artists: Green Day, Linkin Park, Disturbed, Lordi, Nightwish, Owl City, Liz Phair, Offspring, David Archuleta, Zeromancer, Fall Out Boy, The Ting Tings, Five For Fighting, Jordin Sparks, Pink, 3 Doors Down, Jem, Jewel, Nickelback, The Fray, Carrie Underwood, Taylor Swift, Avril Lavigne, Katy Perry, Natasha Bedingfield, Pat Benatar, Goo Goo Dolls, Simple Plan, Vanessa Carlton, Colbiet Caillat, Dixie Chicks, Bowling For Soup, My Chemical Romance, The Lonely Island, Sum 41, Trading Yesterday, 30 Seconds To Mars, Franz Ferdinand, Trapt, Anna Nalick, Wierd Al Yankovich, Lemon Demon, The Rasmus, Metro Station, Breaking Benjamin, Miley Cyrus, Shania Twain, Kristy Lee Cook, Sara Bareilles, Brooks And Dunn, Michelle Branch, Yael Naem, Journey, Alanis Morissette, Lifehouse, Jason Mraz, Pitbull, Rob Thomas, Poison, The Black-Eyed Peas, Shinedown, Theory Of A Dead Man, Evansence, Lady Gaga, Britney Spears, Missy Higgins, Mariah Carey, Madonna, Kellie Pickler, All-American Rejects, The Plain White T's, Kelly Clarkson, Alicia Keys...I think that's it, there might be more...I like a lot of music, okay?

Favorite Songs: Are you willing to read names of songs for 42 hours?


I take no credit for it but I do think it's a kick-ass poem.

Whisper in the yard and turn the trees all into toys
Lay there on the ground and turn the dirt into your joy
From what I see and what I know it's all been boring lately
So I suggest we trade the questipon mark in for a maybe
Time your riddles right and make a point that has no sense
Make sure that your smiling and that the money's been well spent
Innnocence and ignorence, they all go hand in hand
I'm not sure that you're listening but I hope you'll understand
I hope that you're still searching for the start that has no end
And all the plastic people have now become your friends
When your mind begins to drift and your soul begins to scream
I just wanted to tell you that your listening
To a dream

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I drank BEER before so I MUST be a TEENAGE ALCOHOLIC.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear short SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm into THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I have a bunch of GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.

I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken, kool-aid, and watermelon.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I MUST date only other punks.
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7. (Homework= bullshit)
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm trying to LOSE WEIGHT, so I MUST have an eating disorder.
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I love the NIGHT, so I MUST be a vampire.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over-controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST have something to hide.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse and have a big hat.
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I like ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I looked at PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I'm AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent and love hockey and beavers.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth. (well, only a few...)
I'm Asian, so I MUST think my intelligence is superior to everyone else's.
I'm a girl so I MUST like to clean and be neat. (haha not.)
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I'm a GIRL and I'm PISSED, so I MUST be PMSing.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT so I MUST be a pot-smoking, tree hugging hippy.
I don't care what people think about me, so I MUST be an outcast.
I'm Russian so I MUST be violent and own a NUCLEAR WEAPON.

I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies, drink the blood of virgins, and worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be an OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm STRONG-MINDED, so I MUST be a BITCH.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos
I like wearing BLACK and other assorted dark colors, so I MUST be an anti-social goth chick.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I MUST be after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.

I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have no clue. (?)
I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover. (Quiet and polite? Only when I absolutely HAVE to be.)
I prefer SCI-FI, so I MUST be out of touch with reality.
I love TO LEARN so I MUST be boring.
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be a racist.
I'm good with COMPUTERS, so I MUST be a nerd/geek.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST love sports.
I'm NOT RELIGIOUS so I MUST be treated like crap until I pray to your god.
I am a GIRL, so boys MUST be better than me at sports.
I am a PUSHOVER, so I MUST have controlling friends.
I am a GIRL, so I MUST only be good at work. (...)
I am not EMO, so I MUST be uncool
.
I am WHITE and I like to DANCE, so I MUST be lame
I act DEPRESSED, so I MUST be weird. (Only sometimes...)
I dont want to be a CHEERLEADER in high school , so I MUST be a wierd loser.
I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight.
I am “POPULAR”, so I MUST be a rude stuck up brat
I'm AUTISTIC, so I MUST be mean and have no self control
I get (almost) STRAIGHT A’S, so I MUST have no social life.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST think I'm better than everybody else.
I'm WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshiping baby killer
I SUCK MY OWN BLOOD FROM WOUNDS, so I MUST have a VAMPIRE FETISH.
I'm a GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actress.
I'm a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone's butt
I'm a FEMALE BLACK BELT, so I MUST be a lesbian
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant.
I'm FRENCH, so I MUST be homosexual
I'm a BOHEMIAN, so I MUST be a lazy drug addict
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian.
I'm a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie
I'm INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs
I'm a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life
I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd or suck-up.
I'm DIFFERENT, so I MUST just want attention.
I'm an ACTOR/ACTRESS, so I MUST be mean
I haven't EVER HAD A BOYFRIEND, so I MUST be an unromantic
I'm THIN, so I MUST have an eating disorder
I'm a BRUNETTE, so I MUST be a smart alec. (...)
I HAVE A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be dating them all.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math.
I'm a girl so I MUST not be as smart as a guy.
I'm somewhat of a MATERIAL GIRL, so I MUST be a clepto.
I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber-sex.

I'm BLACK, so I MUST be on welfare
I'm PUNK, so I MUST slit my wrists
I'm IRISH, so I MUST be an alcoholic
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a with a jock boyfriend
I'm a METHODIST, so I MUST be a lazy, non-caring person
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST know martial arts, like to eat rice, and own a dry-cleaning business.
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a NERD.
I'm in SHOW CHOIR so I MUST know everything about MUSIC and dance around in the hallways at school.

I LOVE RENT, so I MUST be an emo lesbian with AIDS.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hear crazy God voices in my head
I'm AMERICAN, so I MUST be an overweight pig with no boundaries.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST suck at all guy sports. (I don't suck...I'm just not very good at most of them...at least I try! That counts, doesn't it?...)
I have a CAT, so I MUST dance like a cat in my spare time
My FRIENDS LOVE ME, so I MUST be giving them something.
I'm SUSPICIOUS of some people, so I MUST be an arrogant jerk.
I don't TRUST a lot of people, so I MUST be a bitch with no friends.
I SPEAK GERMAN, so I MUST be a psycho Nazi
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST be rebellious.
I have ADHD/ADD, so I MUST be a crazy-chick that you can't control.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals.
I'm a DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible and LOVE Obama.

I'm a REPUBLICAN, so I MUST support everything that Bush did
I have trouble looking people IN THE EYE, so I MUST be abused.
I'm SHORT, so I MUST compensate with something else
I HANG OUT WITH GAYS, so I MUST be gay too
I'm IMPULSIVE, so I MUST be an idiot.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be dumb.
I'm WHITE, so I MUST be prejudiced.
I WRITE, so I MUST be a loner.
I like wearing bright colors, so I MUST be a big ray of sunshine 24/7.
I'm a GIRL SCOUT, so I MUST sell cookies and run after you like a STALKER until you buy some. (That might be fun...)
I'm QUIET AND SHY, so I MUST be stuck-up. (Sometimes, but only around people I don't know...and hot guys.)

I'm AWKWARD AROUND THE OPPOSITE SEX, so I MUST be a LESBIAN.
I'm FORGETFUL, so I MUST be doing it on purpose.
I sometimes SAY STUPID THINGS, so I MUST be stupid.
I'm TALL, so I MUST be good at basketball and volleyball.

I'm a GYMNAST, so I MUST be a wanna-be cheerleader.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST be hilarious.
I have trouble making FRIENDS, so I MUST be having PERSONAL ISSUES.
I don't HAVE ANY FRIENDS, so I MUST be autistic.
I don't like to talk about my PERSONAL LIFE, so I MUST be having problems. (I only have problems sometimes...)
I like FIRE, so I MUST be an arsonist.
I'm a TEENAGER so I MUST have a STEROTYPE.

I'm a PERSON so I MUST be labled.

Lables are wrong. They piss me off. If you agree, copy and paste. Bold is who you are. Hot damn, that was a long list!


The difference between a GOOD FRIEND and a BEST FRIEND:

A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

A good friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A good friend thinks the friendship is over with an argument. A best friend knows it isn't a friendship until you've had a fight.

A good friend is someone you enjoy hanging out with. A best friend is someone you need.

A good friend will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. A best friend will laugh at you and say, "Ha ha, loser!"

A good friend will offer you a soda. A best friend will dump theirs on you.

A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and runs off with it.

A good friend will help you move into a new house. A best friend will help you move the bodies.

A good friend acts like a guest when visiting. A best friend opens your refrigerator and helps herself.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in jail next to you saying, "Next time, run faster!"

A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried...just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore.

A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has you on speed dial- and will call you at 2 AM just to tell you a dumb joke.

A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.

A good friend will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. A best friend will kick the whole crowd's ass that left you.

A good friend knows a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story.

A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down beside you and cries right there with you.

Even more...

Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost.

Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions.

Friend: Will help me learn to drive.

Best Friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance.

Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away.

Best Friend: Won't let me go away.

Friend: Will help me up when I fall down.

Best Friend: Will point and laugh because she tripped me.

Friend: Will go to a concert with me.

Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me.

Friend: Calls my parents "Mr." or "Mrs."

Best Friend: Calls my parents "Mom" or "Dad"

Good Friend: Wonders about your romantic history.

Best Friend: Could blackmail you with it.

Friend: Hides me from the cops.

Best Friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place.

Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public.

Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.


Here's some more not-so-nomable food for thought:

"I know it's a mess. I see the mess. I'm not gonna clean up the mess because it's my mess, so don't mess with my mess."
-TV commercial

"1: It'e the IQ of George Bush."
-urban dictionary

"Rule #1: The director is always right.
Rule #2: When the director is wrong, refer to rule #1."
-random website

"Of all the places in the world to be from, you had to be from Los Angeles? Why, why, why?...Well, you're from the Bay Area now."
"Get your ass on my stage...Alright, get your ass off my stage, you little piece of shit."
-Billie Joe Armstrong, Green Day concert at HP Pavilion in San Jose

"Where's Val? Is he here today?...Maybe he combusted into flames."
-My kick-ass English teacher

"I diiiiiiid it..."
-Past Tradewind crewmwmber

"The worst time to have a heart attack is when you're playing charades...and your team has really bad guessers. The only worse time is during a game of fake heart attacks followed by naps."
"If someone says 'Are you ticklish?', it doesn't matter if you say yes or no. They're still gonna touch you."
-Death Note parodies

"I'm so Irish I could shit a leprechaun."
-funny pin

"Haha, innuendos...in your endo."
-Mackenzie, my friend

"Kindness is a language which the blind can see and the deaf can hear."
-Mark Twain

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss it you will land among the stars."
-Les Louis Brown

"There is no such thing as stupid people. Only people who have stupid moments. The one exception to this rule is George Bush."
-Me

"The forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest."
-Back of a T-shirt

"You all just lost the game. But I won the contest."
"Can you find me? I'm wearing black." (Can you guess the irony of this statement?)
-HP Pavilion digital graffiti screen

"What does the scouter say about his power level? It's, it's, 1,006...I read it upside down. It's OVER 9,000!!"
-Youtube

"I'm on a boat...wth my swim trunks, and my flippy floppiez."
-The Lonely Island

"Unconditional love is given without any expectations, even when the recipients really screw up. That's why it's called 'unconditional'."
-Me

"Do you want to see mah tummy orchestra?"
-Nuns N' Bagels


Please note that this is not mine and I take no credit for it. I just copied and pasted it from somewhere.

The meaning of friendship takes on varied shapes in different stages of life. Here is something on friendship which most of us can relate to . Friendship and its meaning changes over the years but one thing that does not change is the way we all feel about Friendship .

•Friendship at the age of 5 means sharing a piece of chocolate cake or a candy with your closest buddy.
•Friendship at the age of 10 means wearing the same dress on your birthday and love looking the same despite it being your special day.
•Friendship at the age of 15 means cracking jokes and laughing over your first date mistakes.
•Friendship at 20 means sharing your heartbreaks over a cup of coffee or beer.
•Friendship at 30 means discussing the problems at work and life in general over hours together and then forgetting about it on seeing your favorite team win a match of football over TV, thinking that life’s after all not bad with friends around to enjoy the victory.
•Friendship at 50 means meeting deadlines at office and yet finding the time to just reach your friend’s birthday party when all guests have left and you have strength enough to crash on the bed just to say you remember her birthday and she just seems fine with you forgetting it cuz she knows you care.
•Friendship at 60 means when you sit alone at home yet don’t feel so as you flip through the albums reliving those fond days that you spent in the company of your friends and a smile flashes across your face at the thought that that is someone who still remembers you.
•Friendship at 70 means being happy seeing two small kids hug and share their candy as it brings back those cherished days of friendship.


One final thought before you go...

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with alot of things, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone- Bearhug946, EdwardCullenEqualsLife, Stephanie Deux, Aintzane411, BillieMaysSaysKaboom,

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Heir in Training by HookedOnAvatar011 reviews
Giannine still plays Rasmussem games and loves the despite the occurences in Heir Apparent. When her best freind one Nigel Rasmussem shows her a new game and she get trapped in a virtual world once again, she just can't win for the life of her. Review!
Heir Apparent - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,289 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 4/19/2009 - Published: 3/18/2009
What I think About You by head-in-the-clouds-18 reviews
An amazing poem about friends and the bond between them. This poem is terrific!
Year of the Secret Assignments - Rated: K - English - Poetry - Chapters: 1 - Words: 131 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 1 - Published: 3/12/2009 - Complete
Cell Block Stories? by twistedwriter101 reviews
Permanent hiatus.
Chicago! - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,803 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 22 - Updated: 11/24/2008 - Published: 4/29/2007
100 Ways to Annoy Scipio Bellorum by Boomerang Fish reviews
A howto guide to driving the evil general insane. Featuring: falling anvils, Dancin' Hamsters and Thirrin. IT'S GOING PAST 100! So suggest stuff.
Icemark Chronicles - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,900 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 8/18/2008 - Published: 12/31/2006
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100 Songfics
i know i put this under "parodies and spoofs" but that's the closest thing that came to it. i'm doing an overall rating of M just to cover future entries.There might be additional ratings.this'll take a while to finish, by the way, so just keep checking!
Parodies and Spoofs - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,283 - Updated: 11/5/2009 - Published: 10/28/2009
The Quest Of A Lifetime
Eragon has died and Galbatorix has risen to greater power than ever before. Soon , a new Rider will rise up and challenge him for the throne, and change the entire fate of Alagaesia forever. note: rated M for future chapters
Inheritance Cycle - Rated: M - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 367 - Published: 8/28/2009
Homecoming and Other Ironic Titles
Janice's life is finally stabilized after her mother divorced her abusive tyrant stepfather. But now Dave is making his comeback, and Janice's security is put in jeapordy when she realizes her life may be torn apart all worse than ever before.
Girlbomb - Rated: M - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,366 - Published: 8/20/2009 - Janice, Barb