Tash'KiKiKittehHasBabySwag
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Joined 10-31-11, id: 3388140, Profile Updated: 02-22-12

Hey Im Tash...Thats basically it.

Im really random! ;) RANDOM.

Haterz r really Luverz - you can never change the past nor control the future,but u can change the mood of the day by touching someones heart with your smile.

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!... Take me with you!!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

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x¨°º¤ø„¸Dimitri Belikov¸„ø¤º°¨ x
x¸„ø¤º°¨ Super Hot°º¤ø„¸ x
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Claire? by xEvery.Rose.Has.It's.Thorns.x reviews
Myrnin's friend comes to visit,Shane gets jealous and accuses Claire of cheating on him.Claire cant take it anymore so she leaves Morganville.When she comes back shes a different person and has a secret, the vamps find out they are not alone.
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 15 - Words: 9,293 - Reviews: 131 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 68 - Updated: 1/2/2017 - Published: 7/1/2011
Sundays by Megan Lyn reviews
Sequal to 30 days. It's been a year since Rose and Dimitri have parted ways. A year since seeing each other- but all of that may change with Sundays spent at the beach.
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 3,164 - Reviews: 332 - Favs: 190 - Follows: 216 - Updated: 5/14/2016 - Published: 5/7/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
30 days by Megan Lyn reviews
Rose and Dimitri were high school sweethearts who married young. Now he wants a divorce. She has one request for him before she signs the papers. Every morning for a month he must carry her from their bedroom to the front door. Short drabble story
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 14 - Words: 3,408 - Reviews: 358 - Favs: 172 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 5/14/2016 - Published: 4/16/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Behind the Camera by 0.0-MIDNIGHTROSE-0.0 reviews
Rose Hathaway is the leading photographer of Spirit Magazine. She loves the camera, but sometimes she is hiding behind too much. With her best friends’ wedding coming, will Dimitri discover the hidden stories behind the camera of Rose's life or will he realize that he would rather have her behind her camera instead of kidnapped by a lunatic? AH. Rated M for scenes w/ sexual violenc
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 36 - Words: 127,725 - Reviews: 556 - Favs: 359 - Follows: 277 - Updated: 2/23/2016 - Published: 9/4/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B.
The Russian's worth the price I pay by Ms. Belikov reviews
ALL HUMAN! She's a waitress with a bad attitude. He's a billionaire with a reputation of breaking hearts. When they unexpectedly reunite years later, sparks explode and old flames ignite. But Rose wants nothing to do with Dimitri. Can he win her back?
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 20 - Words: 88,178 - Reviews: 1639 - Favs: 1,295 - Follows: 654 - Updated: 10/24/2014 - Published: 5/7/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Open your Eyes by Ms. Belikov reviews
ALL HUMAN! Sequel to 'A Blessing in Disguise.' Being engaged to the General at St. Augustine's Military Academy is tougher than Rose thought. Old flames and former enemies come back with vengeance. Will it destroy Dimitri and Rose? Or make them stronger?
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 42,629 - Reviews: 892 - Favs: 654 - Follows: 395 - Updated: 10/24/2014 - Published: 6/28/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
A Blessing in Disguise by Ms. Belikov reviews
ALL HUMAN! Rose Hathaway is a troubled teen sent to a private maximum security Military Academy. During her stay, she meets General Dimitri Belikov, who pushes and challenges Rose to her highest possible limits. Can she break through his tough exterior?
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Suspense/Romance - Chapters: 26 - Words: 131,362 - Reviews: 1818 - Favs: 1,171 - Follows: 583 - Updated: 10/24/2014 - Published: 2/19/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
It's a Man's Man's World by Ms.Sweden reviews
In a world ruled by men Rosemarie Hathaway is given away to the Prince of Russia to please him and the higher power. She's becoming his personal courtesan - in own words a slave. No man hand has ever tamed Rose, maybe these hands will? AH/AU full sum ins.
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 27 - Words: 129,312 - Reviews: 1931 - Favs: 1,327 - Follows: 748 - Updated: 3/2/2014 - Published: 3/5/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Fragile Web by sydneysages reviews
ClairexMyrnin. Problems occur every day, and it's just unfortunate that this one threatens Claire's life. All they have to do is find a dead man. How hard can it be? CLYRNIN /Now Finished
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 25 - Words: 87,293 - Reviews: 291 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 5/22/2013 - Published: 5/1/2011 - Claire D., Myrnin
Life of a Rose by littlerosebudbroke reviews
I always knew nothing would save me from the life I was given. Rose is a mafia daughter and Dimitri is left to protect her due to a promise to her brother. Dimitri/Rose, Rated M for a reason.
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 34 - Words: 119,151 - Reviews: 389 - Favs: 341 - Follows: 255 - Updated: 4/17/2013 - Published: 4/29/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Home for the Holidays by MadameRozaBelikova reviews
Rose is engaged to one of the most eligible bachelors in New York, Adrian Ivashkov. He's the heir to one of the top fortune five hundred companies and she's a model who's career has just taken off, but before she can say I do, she has to take care of some business back in her hometown of Baia in the form of her childhood sweetheart, Dimitri Belikov to whom she is still married.
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 29 - Words: 108,272 - Reviews: 1644 - Favs: 571 - Follows: 365 - Updated: 3/17/2013 - Published: 10/14/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Fated by Reader.Writer.TVLover reviews
After their one night stand, Rose Hathaway never thought she'd see Dimitri again. So when she shows up for her first college class and sees Professor Belikov standing at the front of the classroom, she realizes that fate isn't on her side. AU/AH
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 31 - Words: 39,207 - Reviews: 1254 - Favs: 1,146 - Follows: 788 - Updated: 3/12/2013 - Published: 4/29/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Look at me now by Gabzz777 reviews
Shane is now understanding the price of his mistakes. The love of his life. Claire. But she will never forgive him. Or will she. Shane X Claire Enjoy. plz review!
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 10 - Words: 13,691 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 2/28/2013 - Published: 7/27/2011 - Claire D., Shane C.
You Only Live Twice by Lauren-Jade95 reviews
Claire gets attacked one night one the way home from Myrnin's. The only way to survive is to be changed into a Vampire. Shane and Eve are against it but Michael and Myrnin are there to help. With old romances failing, will new survive. ***On Hold****
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 16 - Words: 19,877 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 2/7/2013 - Published: 3/27/2011 - Claire D., Michael G.
sweet surrender by Rachel Louise xxx reviews
shane gripped my hand Michael the other. i knew it would come to this just not this soon. it was then i noticed only one person was holding my hand. i heard Eve scream and drop to the floor like a stone... please read and review
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 6,041 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 11/4/2012 - Published: 4/26/2011 - Claire D.
In the Time of the Beast by TaniMar reviews
Roza's village is destroyed by brutal men who fight for power. She is taken into the Belikov Clan and must learn the ways of these savage people. What happens when she falls under the power of Dimitri- the Chief's son? Can this wild man be the person to help fulfill Roza's destiny?
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 16,976 - Reviews: 242 - Favs: 167 - Follows: 253 - Updated: 8/20/2012 - Published: 5/29/2012 - Dimitri B., Rose H.
Claire Gets a Facebook by MadamP reviews
Just a random Idea that popped in my head, Claire on Facebook, what does she do? Spend her time watching what girls post on Shane's wall? Or use it to meet new friends? note: I've only read to The 4th book
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 2,816 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 7/27/2012 - Published: 12/1/2011 - Claire D.
White Blank Page by SKDanielle16 reviews
Human. Rose and Dimitri meet in a coffee shop and do things that make him question his marriage, but Rose is able to push away his doubts when she gives herself to him. Will they end up together or will Dimitri go back to his wife?
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 66,862 - Reviews: 601 - Favs: 447 - Follows: 246 - Updated: 7/15/2012 - Published: 7/3/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
The One That Got Away by HeIsTheSunAndITheMoon reviews
It's been a few months and it seems like she's doing okay... She has a new job,starting fresh, but if she thought finding out she was pregnant would be the biggest surprise of her life, than finding out who her boss is might actually bigger. AH
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 21 - Words: 30,249 - Reviews: 388 - Favs: 157 - Follows: 165 - Updated: 6/10/2012 - Published: 2/22/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B.
Husband VS Hormoned struck pregnant monster by Ms.Sweden reviews
Reposting my sequel to Husband VS Wife. It'll contain all kinds of stuff and it's Rated M, ENJOY!
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 84,820 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 211 - Follows: 107 - Updated: 6/2/2012 - Published: 6/1/2012 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
The golden lily by Mrs Castile reviews
Things in Palm Springs just got a whole lot more complicated after Dimitri arrived, will Sydney be able to control things or will they finally be exposed?
Vampire Academy - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 22 - Words: 33,361 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 6/1/2012 - Published: 12/8/2011 - Sydney S., Adrian I. - Complete
Seductress by sydneysages reviews
Claire/Michael. There's a deep desire between the pair of them, something ignited when they're together. But, unfortunately, there's Shane in the way. And just what happens when Amelie finds out? R&R /complete
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 14 - Words: 28,120 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 69 - Updated: 5/19/2012 - Published: 4/23/2011 - Claire D., Michael G. - Complete
Cheers Darlin' by TaniMar reviews
Their love was unexpected but filled with so much passion. He never wanted to fall in love with the girl at his shop and suffered when he lost her. Sometimes, fate is amazing enough for a second chance. Dimitri and Rose get that chance.
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,083 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 115 - Follows: 45 - Published: 5/1/2012 - Dimitri B., Rose H. - Complete
Black Rose by writer0306 reviews
Rose pushes everyone she loves away b/c she's depressed. Dimitri leaves to guard Tasha; he leaves Rose pregnant. Several years later, Rose is suddenly kidnapped by Strigoi and Dimitri comes back to help rescue her...and everything begins to unravel...
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 40 - Words: 164,257 - Reviews: 799 - Favs: 682 - Follows: 384 - Updated: 4/13/2012 - Published: 1/25/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
My motorcycle Boy by Livebythebook reviews
All Human. Rose is in Russia for her bestfriends wedding only to get lost on the way. She ends up in the small town of baia and meets a man on a motorcycle who gives her some directions. R&R
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 16 - Words: 40,742 - Reviews: 423 - Favs: 244 - Follows: 190 - Updated: 3/1/2012 - Published: 12/18/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Struggles With What's Right And What I Want by sydneysages reviews
ClaireMyrnin He's her soulmate, the one that she is meant to be with, but the pulls to the other side are intoxicating. She's not strong enough to resist them...and, like an angel, she falls. Complete, sequel to follow.
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Suspense - Chapters: 68 - Words: 211,102 - Reviews: 577 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 40 - Updated: 2/17/2012 - Published: 12/26/2010 - Claire D., Myrnin - Complete
Forever Broken by Written Shadow reviews
This story takes place back in school when Alyssa was alive. She's in love with Michael.. but does he love her? NOTE: She is 14, Shane and Michael are 16.
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,408 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 2/11/2012 - Published: 1/11/2012 - Alyssa C./Lyssa, Michael G. - Complete
Morganville Vampires: The Founder has a Boss? by Lady Fandom reviews
Claire meets an interesting girl, much like herself in a way, on the TPU campus. Soon after, she discovers that the tiny girl is not all she seems to be. No Athena is much, much more.
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Supernatural/Romance - Chapters: 19 - Words: 33,465 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 2/1/2012 - Published: 8/29/2011 - Claire D., Oliver - Complete
The Disease by Nicia reviews
"Tasha get the message. Dimitri doesn't want you or to be your guardian, and he never will. You're a pathetic woman, who can't get over herself or being rejected. We'll find a cure without your 'help'." Please read and review. xx
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 23 - Words: 48,402 - Reviews: 281 - Favs: 151 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 1/16/2012 - Published: 9/1/2010 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Cheater by VaMpIrElUvEr1333 reviews
Shane cheated on Claire with Eve.So she leaves Morganville with her sister. Seven years later she comes back to give the cure to the vampires,but something weird happened.What happened to Morganville?And what happened to the glass house gang. Please R&R
Morganville Vampires - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Tragedy - Chapters: 9 - Words: 16,524 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 1/9/2012 - Published: 8/20/2011 - Claire D.
Fight Back by Kessafan reviews
One life changing event; it can destroy your soul or it can make you fight back. It was supposed to be the beginning of the rest of her life, in a way, it was. Life wasn't meant to be this hard. Lots of Angst. All Human. All canon. Lemons in later chapters.
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 38 - Words: 201,733 - Reviews: 908 - Favs: 433 - Follows: 279 - Updated: 1/2/2012 - Published: 8/17/2010 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Senior Year by hypnoticeyes reviews
Her world tore apart by tragedy and loss, Sookie Stackhouse found herself attending her senior year at Shreveport High, alone and friendless. Eric Northman simply wanted to graduate so he could go home to Sweden, until he met Sookie. AH/AU/OOC COMPLETE!
Sookie Stackhouse/Southern Vampire Mysteries - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 23 - Words: 43,298 - Reviews: 385 - Favs: 169 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 1/1/2012 - Published: 9/11/2011 - Eric, Sookie - Complete
never let go by MorganFangs reviews
Claire left morganville and when eve michael and shane are on their way to dallas they see claire. will she remember and come back? or will she not listen and leave them forever? plz R&R first fanfic please be nice!
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 8,795 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 21 - Updated: 11/28/2011 - Published: 10/26/2011 - Claire D., Shane C.
Texas Prairie Massacre by tanzy95 reviews
Dean and Jason are tired of the crap that Morganville has dealt them over the years so they decide to go on a murderous rampage around the TPU... While Claire is there. Will she survive or share the same fate as some of her fellow students?
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 17,043 - Reviews: 67 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 11/17/2011 - Published: 10/21/2011 - Claire D.
Does Your Husband Know? by she lives in a daydream reviews
And does your husband know the way that the sunshine gleams from your wedding band? Does he know the way of the crickets that would convince me to call it a night? Does he know the way to worship our love? /All human. RxD.
Vampire Academy - Rated: T - English - Romance/Crime - Chapters: 26 - Words: 136,124 - Reviews: 448 - Favs: 237 - Follows: 142 - Updated: 10/2/2011 - Published: 5/18/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
The Broken Glass Slipper by D. Kelly reviews
Human Rose 18,her father arrange 2 suitors for marriage. Rose run-away from it, loses a friend. Sneaks a board merchantship having it sink under her and ends up on pirate ship, With a dashing sexy Pirate Captain. Romance on the High Sea or not M rating.
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 36 - Words: 117,017 - Reviews: 853 - Favs: 304 - Follows: 187 - Updated: 9/23/2011 - Published: 6/20/2011
Never GoodBye by Gabzz777 reviews
He would never have enough time to say good-bye. tears stained her check as shane held her against him for her dear life. ShaneXClaire. crap summary better story. Randam drabble Plzz read and review. ONE-SHOT -Gabzz777 x-x-x
Morganville Vampires - Rated: K - English - Romance/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,306 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 8/18/2011 - Shane C., Claire D. - Complete
Russian Mafia Boss by IceFemme reviews
Dimitri is on the run from the mafia. He then meets Rose... By smashing her window and jumping inside, in the process scaring the living hell out of her. What can possibly happen between the two in the time that Dimitri has to stay at her house for refuge? I mean, what was Rose actually expecting? More summary inside. HUMAN! Lemons! Not to mention adorable chubby little dogs!
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 17 - Words: 73,186 - Reviews: 474 - Favs: 519 - Follows: 261 - Updated: 8/9/2011 - Published: 6/21/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Husband VS Wife by Ms.Sweden reviews
ALL HUMAN! As a spy you never let your relationship get in the way of your job. When a things go bad Rose and Dimtiri went separate ways and never looked back. Until they meet again, How will it end? A Romantic Action Tale with a Mr and Mrs Smith twist!
Vampire Academy - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 71,424 - Reviews: 291 - Favs: 414 - Follows: 176 - Updated: 8/4/2011 - Published: 6/28/2011 - Rose H., Dimitri B. - Complete
Lies or Protection? by QueenOfFrozenWinds reviews
Claire has lived with her housemates for over a year now but do they really know her? or does she have a secret that could tear them all apart? read and find out more!R&R plz!
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 18 - Words: 13,346 - Reviews: 53 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 7/30/2011 - Published: 6/16/2011 - Claire D., Shane C.
The New Vampire by littlemisssunshine711 reviews
A girl moves to Morganville when her brother gets accepter by the university. She moves into a house with four teenagers Shane, Claire, Michael, and Eve and has no idea the town is run by vampires.
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,334 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/12/2011 - Published: 5/21/2011
New Beginning by xoxoxtwilightxoxox reviews
FADE OUT Chapter 12 "She felt the air glide across her skin for a meer second until she felt a hard yank.Her shoe had gotten caught.She screamed, letting out all the air in her lungs."Claire!" Myrnin yelled. *SUCK AT SUMMARYS* LOTS of BIG THINGS happen.
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 11 - Words: 14,352 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 37 - Updated: 7/1/2011 - Published: 8/30/2010 - Claire D., Shane C.
Serrated Blade by sydneysages reviews
He's cheating on her. She can't believe it. She does something that causes someone else's heart to break. Can she come back? Or is she lost... Forever? Will she do things she regrets? Contains suicide. Shane/Claire/Michael. Entirely original. Please r&r!
Morganville Vampires - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 19 - Words: 35,430 - Reviews: 219 - Favs: 71 - Follows: 60 - Updated: 6/29/2011 - Published: 2/27/2011 - Claire D., Michael G. - Complete