Ilssii-Koschei
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Joined 04-08-10, id: 2320229, Profile Updated: 08-07-12
Author has written 3 stories for Doctor Who.

Peoples of FFN, please attend carefully...my name is Ilssii-Koschei and I can shout just as loud as you can! I have a disturbing tendency to live inside my own head most of the time, but, due to circumstances beyond me control, I have taken up temporary residence on Earth, England. And, yes, for all you people out there who do not have the misfortune to live here, it does indeed rain a lot. But a plus of living in this dull grey country is that it is the home of the most brilliant sci-fi show ever written...Doctor Who _ Previously, I set up a warning on here telling people to back off if they didn't like it, but I've realised that makes me look like a stupid, close-minded, human fantard that gives the 100% of the other real fans a bad name. So, apologies about that. But if you really don't like the show, it's probably not worth you reading much futher, if you intend to comment on my fics. It's the only show on television I know enough about to write anything halfway decent.

I prefer writing ficlets to fully-fledged fics, as that way I do not have to commit myself to anything, hence inducing boredom and making my fic rubbish. Also, I have a real lack of stamina, but I am improving. Slowly.

I am an avid reader- I really, really love books. I'll give most genres a go- except this so-called "Paranormal Romance" that the people seem to find so amazing. I tend to enjoy sci-fi and the gothic over any form romance, paranormal or not, though I'm not averse to an interesting, well-written relationship as long as it doesn't make up the whole plot of the book. I also have a liking for black comedy and the bizarre and psychedelic.


Me in general

-I'm not any excatly any religion, but I am not atheist either. I lack the rock-solid certainty of my place in the universe.

-I really, really dis-like Twilight, both the books and the films. I'll respect any fans who respect the fact I don't like it, but if you come here specifically to flame me about my dislike, you shall be ignored.

-Please don't bother sending me chain letters-I won't pass them on. It's just stupid and clutters up my inbox.

-Some bands/artists are amazing, others of the same genre not so much. Though I'll admit I tend towards the rock side of things. I like...

Green Day (punk rock)

My Chemical Romance (Alt. rock)

Biffy Clyro (rock)

Billy Bragg (alt. rock)

The Hoosiers (Pop/rock)

Frank Turner (folk/punk)

The Killers (rock)

Pink Floyd (Prog. rock)

- I'm perfectly happy to receive random messages from fellow Whovians, even if they are just a few lines to let me know that some people out there in the big wide universe share my obsession.

I will tend to go on about...

- Doctor Who- both old and new.

- How terrible Twishite is.

- Terry Pratchett.

- Old T.V series people have probably never heard of or seen- the original Doctor Whos, Takin' Over The Asylum, The Young Ones, Red Dwarf etc.

Pet hates

- Robert Pattinson

-"It" girls

- Bad grammar

- Out-of-character fanfictions

- Poor, mass produced children's books- if you want to write, put some love into it!

- Poor television

- The daleks new colour scheme

- People who call him "The Doctor Who"- it's "Doctor Who" or "The Doctor"!

A Note to Fellow Whovians on my Opinions on parts of the show.

-I'm a follower of the old series (1-8) as well as the new (9-11). Personally, I think they're both awesome. Especially Tom Bakers era- The Horror of Fang Rock was the only one aside from The Empty Child to give me nightmares.

-I support Eleven! I was a Matt Smith hater (another example of my hypocrisy- it's a bit of a habit =(), but I'm happy to admit I was very, very wrong.

-I've tried fish custard. It's actually very nice.

- The end of Stolen Earth would have been an amazing moment to introduce Eleven- imagine him going up against Simms EoT!Master...

-I'm personally of the opinion that the Weeping Angels should have been left at Blink. I disliked intensely the way The Moff let the veiwer see them move. I'm not saying it wasn't a bad episode...I just think it would have been better to have used another kind of monster.

-I've a bit of a fangirl-y thing about The Master, mainly the John Simm version. Lunacy is a personal fascination of mine.


Note: I'm likely to remove what little I have on here and put up some new stuff some time soon. My entire profile is in need of a grand overhaul.

Hope you'll stick around to read my fics _

Ilssii-Koschei, over and out.

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Shell Shocked by NotSoSilentWallflower reviews
Following Reichenbach, John decides to return to therapy.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,830 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 186 - Follows: 52 - Published: 6/17/2012 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
The Art of Trolling by Hekateras reviews
Post-Reichenbach: Moriarty is still alive, and hacks into John's blog again. Big time.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,248 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 385 - Follows: 50 - Published: 1/20/2012 - J. Moriarty, Sherlock H. - Complete
Anonymous by Hekateras reviews
Sherlock Holmes is dead, but his heart never stopped beating, his lungs never stopped pumping air, and his mind has been so very busy. By every reasonable practical, medical definition, he is still alive. And he wants to see John.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,809 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 65 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/15/2012 - Sherlock H., John W.
Time is an Illusion by Aietradaea reviews
One for Ilssii-Koschei. It's barely been a day since his botched resurrection, and the Master is already falling apart more than he realizes. "End of Time" oneshot.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,165 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/1/2012 - The Master, Professor Yana - Complete
And Then There Was Silence by LeonaWriter reviews
In a universe where the Master wasn't dragged back into the Time War with Gallifrey and instead lost the drums in his head, he began to travel with the Doctor. And then, of course, there was Amy. No pairings. Drabbles set from End of Time on, no order.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 17,411 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 82 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 6/1/2011 - Published: 6/2/2010 - 11th Doctor, The Master
Alone On the Water by MadLori reviews
Sherlock is diagnosed with a terminal illness. Warning: angst like whoa.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 8,210 - Reviews: 5559 - Favs: 12,865 - Follows: 1,691 - Published: 4/17/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Keeping Time by Aietradaea reviews
What if the Daleks had found out that two Time Lords survived the Time War? This fic starts out by combining "End of Time" and "Victory of the Daleks", and is readable if you haven't seen them. It's a story in its own right - only minor spoilers.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Angst - Chapters: 18 - Words: 46,325 - Reviews: 126 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 3/6/2011 - Published: 1/14/2011 - The Master, Daleks, Abigail N., Wilfred M./Wilf - Complete
Time and Time Again: The Bloopers by Aietradaea reviews
A sneaky look at what went on behind the scenes of my long Doctor Who fic, "Time and Time Again" - a humorous, cracky spin-off. Why did they let themselves be talked into doing fanfiction? *Bloopers'verse*
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 6 - Words: 8,612 - Reviews: 43 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 2/17/2011 - Published: 5/5/2010 - The Master, Wilfred M./Wilf, 10th Doctor
A Collection of Scenes by LexieBird reviews
Basically a collection of all the little scenes I write when I'm bored. Don't want to stretch them into a full story, so here they are. Just a bit of everything, will update as I write. May include the odd crossover. Please review!
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 11 - Words: 4,952 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 2/8/2011 - Published: 10/20/2010
The Children of Gallifrey by The Hand of Omega reviews
A series of drabbles about the childhood and friendship of the Doctor and the Master. Some are fun, some are sad. No slash.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 58 - Words: 13,973 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 100 - Follows: 61 - Updated: 1/20/2011 - Published: 6/13/2010 - 1st Doctor, The Master
Recovery by Punkylemon reviews
What would have happened if the young ones survived the bus crash and blaze? This is what, I thought, might happen in the hospital, with the young ones in residence. I do not own 'The Young Ones'.
Young Ones - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,302 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/14/2011
Out Of Time by Aietradaea reviews
Plot bunny stew for Ilssii-Koschei, in which the Master returns to life somewhat the worse for wear. Minor spoilers for "End of Time" part one. M-rated mostly for gore and violence.
Doctor Who - Rated: M - English - Horror/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,161 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/29/2010 - The Master - Complete
Neutralization by Shadow-ofthe-Night35 reviews
The reason the vampires are still in the Badass Club, or how Doctor Who Awesomeness Killed off the Cullen Clan, one by one. HUMOR Edward Rosalie Carlisle Emmett Jasper chapters complete. CRACKFIC!
Crossover - Doctor Who & Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 3,458 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 12/14/2010 - Published: 5/17/2010 - Edward
And A Partridge In A Pear Tree by Omegalomaniac reviews
On the first day of Christmas, Sherlock gave to John...
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,153 - Reviews: 15 - Favs: 39 - Follows: 3 - Published: 12/10/2010 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Not This Time! by Aietradaea reviews
Twenty years into the future, the Whoniverse of now is encroaching upon our own world - and there's only one fangirl obsessed enough to know the answers and save the day! Yeah, right... Now a two-shot with added plot bunny stew for allonsy-doctor!
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Sci-Fi/Parody - Chapters: 2 - Words: 3,166 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 11/25/2010 - Published: 8/4/2010 - Harold Saxon - Complete
A Little Less Thinkin' And A Lot More Drinkin' by Omegalomaniac reviews
There are very few substances that can affect a Time Lord; alcohol is not one of them. Doctor/Master
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,098 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/19/2010 - 10th Doctor, The Master - Complete
It Takes A Village by CaffieneKitty reviews
Sherlock Holmes is ill and the world does not come to an end. Film at 11. GEN.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,805 - Reviews: 98 - Favs: 539 - Follows: 58 - Published: 9/6/2010 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
A Brief Account Of Life With Zombies by Silver Pard reviews
Sherlock thinks it's all a bit of a nuisance, John is having the time of his life, and Mycroft is Not Impressed. With anything, but mostly his minions' inability to provide a good cup of tea.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,384 - Reviews: 382 - Favs: 2,562 - Follows: 300 - Published: 8/19/2010 - Complete
Time and Time Again by Aietradaea reviews
It's a steep price to pay, for what's been done. Follows on from "The End of Time" - bit tricky to give a summary without giving anything away or being misleading.
Doctor Who - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Angst - Chapters: 34 - Words: 54,088 - Reviews: 265 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 38 - Updated: 6/28/2010 - Published: 4/11/2010 - The Master, Wilfred M./Wilf, 10th Doctor, Jack H. - Complete
Cutting Away The Pain by L-Ishida-Dark reviews
A short and silly oneshot. Death meets a soul-briefly, as always-who informs him of yet another inexplicable facet of human existance.
Discworld - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 675 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/30/2009 - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Rejection reviews
I've come up with a theory, of sorts. Read, and tell me if you agree or not ;
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 286 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 5 - Published: 7/31/2011 - 11th Doctor, The Master - Complete
Duct Tape Solves Everything reviews
Silly little one-shot about how you might repair an exploded TARDIS.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 243 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Published: 9/26/2010 - 11th Doctor, Amelia P./Amy - Complete
Look Right, Then Leave reviews
The Doctor has just regenerated and tries to take the new TARDIS for a "quick hop to the moon and back". And misses. By a lot. He ends up on a lonely world he's never been to, but is responsible for. One-shot.
Doctor Who - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 793 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Published: 9/25/2010 - 11th Doctor - Complete