"In a room of open doors the man with the book is king and honey you should see me reading books."

-Moriarty, Steven Moffat (improved)

"I fell in love like ketchup comes out of a bottle, slowly then all at once."

-Hazel, John Green (again improved)

"Always bring a banana to a party."

-Tenth Doctor, Steven Moffat (Seriously, that doesn't need any improvement)

"Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the TV."

-Dumbledore, J.K.Rowling (Yup, did improve this one)