The Ministry enacts a Marriage Law, magically pairing couples who'd never in a million years agree to even speak, let alone wed. Paired off with Malfoy, Hermione has to suffer the added indignity of the Ministry banning all contraception and forcing fertility treatment and aphrodisiacs on them all. Draco's secret makes it worse.

Post-war, eighth-year marriage law fic. In a world where pureblood pomp collides with muggleborn sass not everything is as it seems. As the pairings unfold in the most peculiar matches, the current and former students of Hogwarts have a learning curve ahead of them. Little do they know that those people they called enemies might turn out to be their perfect match.