Hi everyone

Hope you like my stories if you don't try and make some better :)

Love

HarryPotterObessed13

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run, bitch ,run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit

At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping it all over his lap.

When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by

jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.

When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion. You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.

When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp. You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug. You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You thanked him by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked him by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm

so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends

When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you how deeply he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the country.

When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their children.

And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, post this on your profile

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Copy this bunny into your profile to help it achieve world domination.
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The Rules of Hogwarts:

I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office

I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter

I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.

I am not allowed to make light sabre sounds with my wand

I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it

I will not lock the Slytherin's and Gryffindor's in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive

I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day"

I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways

It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

I will not use the phrase, "Get a Life" when talking to Voldemort

I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling

I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell

It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate

I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion

I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween

It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously

I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet

"To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice

I Must not interrupt and shout 'WHOO! Way to go' every time Dumbledore or anyone makes a speech in The Great Hall.

What a Boyfriend SHOULD Do:

When she walks away from you mad Follow her

When she stares at your mouth Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you Grab her and don't let go

When she starts cussing at you Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet Ask her whats wrong

When she ignores you Give her your attention

When she pulls away Pull her back

When you see her at her worst Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying Just hold her and don't say a word

When you see her walking Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared Protect her

When she lays her head on your shoulder Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steals your favorite hat Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time Reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you she really does more than you could understand

When she grabs at your hands Hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes don't look away until she does

When she misses you she's hurting inside

When you break her heart the pain never really goes away

When she says its over she still wants you to be hers

When she repost this bulletin she wants you to read it

Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.

When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her because 10 yrs later she'll remember you

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

Tease her and let her tease you back.

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.

Give her the world.

Let her wear your clothes.

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.

Let her know she's important.

Kiss her in the pouring rain.

When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's butt am I kicking?"

If your life were a movie, what would the soundtrack be? So, here's how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc.)

2. Put it on shuffle

3. Press play

4. For every question, type the song that's playing

5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool.

Opening Credits: Gotta to be you One Direction

Waking up: Higher – Save You Tonight One Direction

First day at school: Perfect Man Destiny’s Child

Making new best friend: Independent Woman Part 1 Destiny’s Child

Falling in love: Enchanted Taylor Swift

Breaking up: Dangerously In Love Destiny’s Child

Prom: The Story Of Us Taylor Swift

Graduation: Haunted Taylor Swift

Life's okay: Love That Lets Go - Hannah Montana

Death of a close friend: Mean Taylor Swift

Mental Breakdown: Dear John Taylor Swift

Driving: Never Grow Up Taylor Swift

Flashback: You’ve been So Good To Me/ Now Behold The Lamb/ Jesus Loves Me Destiny’s child

Getting back together: Sparks Fly Taylor Swift

Car accident: More Than This One Direction

Wedding scene: Fancy Destiny’s Child

Final Battle: Same Mistakes One Direction

Birth of a child: Innocent Taylor Swift

Death scene: Back To December Taylor Swift

Funeral Song: Better Than Revenge Taylor Swift

End Credits: Brown Eyes Destiny’s Child

Deleted Scenes: The Story Of Beauty Destiny’s Child

List your 12 fav. Harry Potter Characters

1)Hermione Granger

2)Ginny Weasley

3)Luna Lovegood

4)Molly Weasley

5)Draco Malfoy

6)Blaize Zabini when hes itallian

7)Fred Weasley

8)George Weasley

9)Oliver Wood

10)Harry Potter

11)Dobby

12)Cedric Diggory

What if One and Two dated?

Wrong!!!

Would you read a fanfic about Nine and Seven?

No!!!!

Would you write a fanfic about Four and Eight? What would the title be?

Mother’s Love

What if 9 got 10 pregnant?

Impossible I think

Father:"Your in big trouble miss.!"
Chid: "I Didn't do anything
Father: "YOU KICKED HIM!"
Child: "It was an accident!"
Father:"In The Face..."
Child: "My foot slipped.."
Father: "Five times?!"
Child: ...

Female come backs
pick up line comebacks

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: "I know how to please a woman."
Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you."
Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name."
Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman: "Do not Enter"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason"
Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "Haven't we met before?"
Woman: "Perhaps. I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Love vs. Sex

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elmtrees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.

The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before.

When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked her.

When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her."

Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God? Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly believe in God.

PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what... and if you stand up for him he will
stand up for you.
I bet 93 of you people that read this won't repost