You are in a new place. A place you have never been to before. A place unlike everything you've ever seen.

We welcome you.

We are many.

We lie in the screaming shadows.

We cannot be tracked.

We cannot be found.

You cannot draw us to the surface.

Unless you somehow managed to secure a tub of a certain delectable, frozen semi-solid in which case we ask, "What sort of perverted wizardry do you possess that would allow you to obtain such a thing? And can we have some?"

You know not of us.

That is good.

That is how things should be.

We have arrived here at last. And we intend to stay.

We are the Coalition Of Organized, Killing, International Enigmas.

We are C.O.O.K.I.E.