Hit 'n Run
A man returned from shopping to find his car had been badly dented, and the culprit was no where in sight.
As he got closer he felt relieved when he saw a note had been placed under his windshield-wiper. Laughing at himself for doubting the honesty of the average person, he pulled the note loose and read it, it said :"THE PEOPLE WATCHING ME THINK I'M LEAVING MY NAME AND ADDRESS, BUT I'M NOT." Food For Thought
- Out of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.
- Woman have many faults where as men only have one- They're men.
- No one dies a virgin. Life screws us all.
- Cats are much smarter than dogs. It's not like you're going to get 6 cats to pull a sled in the snow.
- Don't take life too seriously, it's not like you're coming out alive.
- Before you critize someone, try walking a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do critize them, you'll be a mile away with extra sneakers.
- When I die, I want to go like my grandfather did, peacefully in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like all the passengers in his car.
- In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
- Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.
- The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.
- Friends help you move. Real friends help you move dead bodies.
- I want a guy that's sensitive and caring, and that loves cats. Unfortunately, most guys like that are gay.
- If at first you don't succeed, then you didn't do it right!
- There are 3 type of people. Those who can count. And those who can't count.
- To successfully keep robbers out of your house put six locks on your door. When you go out, lock every other one. No matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.
- Arguing on the internet is like running in the special olympics. Even if you win, you're still retarted.
- We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
- Isn't it stupid how people say "It's always in the last place you look"? I mean so freakin' duh it's in the last place you look. Who looks for something after they found it?
- I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months -- I don't like to interrupt her.
- Ever notice how fast Windows runs? Neither did I.
- Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected?
- If seven elevens never closed, why do they put locks on the doors?
- Best friends are the siblings God forgot to give us.
- The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.
- Don't cry over someone who won't cry over you

Hey everyone, please review! Yes, I WILL put chapters up no matter if you review or not, but it'll inspire me more if you review! That's the main reasons my chapters are so short. Im not that inspired to write them! If you are reading either one of my stories then just hit the review button and type down what you think! I don't care if it's a flame or not. I enjoy flames, because they usually tell me what I need to work on. But by flames please dont put anything like "HEY, YOU'RE STORY SUCKS!!!111!!11 SO STOP POSTING IT YOU MORON!"...No, none of this will be acceptable. Flames that tell me what I should work on will be though. And also, some reviewer has been going around by the name of 'jamiespears' and posting evil flames. So please block her.
-LordInuChan