Doctor Homicide 157 | FanFiction

Doctor Homicide 157

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Joined 08-06-16, id: 8140879, Profile Updated: 06-14-19

Author has written 1 story for Team Fortress 2.

Actual Information

Hey! I'm Doctor Homicide and I see that you are interested in me. So here's a little about myself in a intervew

Name: KING CRIMSON WAS HERE

Location: MERICU

Nationality: Chinese

Gender: Male

Religon: The church of helix

Dragon of choice: Dragonite! He can fly around the, wait, what? How to train your dragon dragons? Wellp, this is akward...

Pokemon of choice: Typhlosion, nuff said.

Favorite Author: Reevee21, check her out

Favorite Drink: Bastion Bourbon

Favorite Song: Don't stop me now

Favorite Gun: The SPAS 12

Favorite Actor: Gene Wilder

Favorite Band: Queen

Favorite singer: Freddie Mercury

Favorite Jojo character: Diego Brando

Copy and paste

HELP EEVEE TAKE OVER THE WORLD !

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The girl you just called fat?

She is overdosing on diet pills.

The girl you just called ugly?

She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her.

The boy you just tripped?

He is abused enough at home.

See that man with the ugly scars?

He fought for his country.

That guy you just made fun of for crying?

His mother is dying.

Put this as you're profile if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you wont put this on your profile, but I'm sure the people with a heart and backbone will.

This is not my story, but if you don't read this I swear I will hunt you down:

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.

As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him.

So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'

He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!'

There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude. I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.

We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.

I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.

Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!

Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!' He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. 'Thanks,' he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began, 'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.' I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.

He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. 'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.' I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.

I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse.

You now have two choices, you can :

1) Put this on your profile or

2) Forget you read this and act like it didn't touch your heart.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...
When I was born I was BLACK,
When I grew up I was BLACK,
When I'm sick I'm BLACK,
When I go in the sun I'm BLACK,
When I'm cold I'm BLACK,
When I die I'll be BLACK.
But you sir,
When you're born you're PINK,
When you grow up you're WHITE,
When you're sick, you're GREEN,
When you go in the sun you turn RED,
When you're cold you turn BLUE,
And when you die you turn PURPLE.
And you have the nerve to call me colored?"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Please let this be a reminder and take time to pray for all of our soldiers who are being sent away, putting their lives on the line fighting for US.

Prayer for the Military.

Please keep the wheel rolling. It will only take a few seconds of your time, but it'll be worth it to read on...

Lord, hold our troops in your loving hands.

Protect them.

Bless them and their families.

I ask this in the name of Jesus, our Lord and Savior.

Amen.

When you read this, please stop for a moment and say a prayer for our servicemen and women all around the world.

There is nothing attached, but this can be very powerful.

Of all the gifts you could give a Soldier, prayer is the very best one.

Do not stop the wheel, please -- just send this on.

(I am not Cristian, but I will keep the wheel going)

Girls Don't Realize These Things

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with a-holes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

Therefore, I MUST:

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be dumb
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be attractive.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a mature content tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a brat.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL suffer.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should suffer.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. (I hate this kind of person)
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm FAT, so I MUST like cake.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid or stuck up
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be an inappropriate dresser.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking person.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be irresponsible.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST.
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be 'sharing time' with them.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with CAMP people, so I must be CAMP too.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I’m a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I’m STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm AGNOSTIC, so I MUST just need a push in the "right" direction.
I'm MIXED so I must be crazy.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm MORMON so I MUST have seven wives.
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid and stuck up.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a wimp.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I HANG OUT with teenage DRINKERS AND SMOKERS, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be a controlling brat.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be an over controlling brat.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my girlfriend having a baby.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm BRITISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT so I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-Sue.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.(I don't usually curse)
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be rude.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I CRY easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I CAN'T HELP POINTING OUT mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake.
I am WHITE and I like COMPUTERS, so I MUST be a NERDY GEEK
I AM KIND to other PEOPLE, so I MUST be WEAK.
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems.
I'm PRO-ABORTION , so I MUST be heartless.
I have ASPERGER SYNDROME so I MUST be MENTALLY CHALLENGED.
I am FEMINIST, so I MUST be LESBIAN.
I am a SCIENTIST, so I MUST be ATHEIST.
I am CLOSE TO MY FAMILY, so I MUST be going to live with my family when I'm 50.
I am a COUNTRY PERSON, so I MUST have like, 20 kids.
I believe in GREEK MYTHOLOGY, so I MUST be insane.

Show the people who think these things, even your own self, that THEY'RE WRONG.
No one is ever perfect.
Tell the world.

Quotes

When in doubt, press random buttons !

ONE PUUUNNCH!

Doctor, a word for wise man, healer, I am both, but what are you.

Just keep on trying till you run out of cake.

The only limit is the boundary of your imagination. Willy wonka.

You are powerful, and you are imperfect. Therefore, you are dangerous. You must not turn away from this truth, not treat the danger lightly or flee from it. You must look it in the face and not abandon it in despair. You must be willing to wear your fearsome power.

Memes win games

GOD IS DEAD AND HAS BEEN REPLACED BY 51 TRAINS

The art direction is beautiful

Whada ya mean I did bad on time!

Whada ya mean I did bad on art direction!

Whada ya mean I did good on time!

Create chaos until nobody knows what to do anymore

Tonight I'm gonna have myself a real good time
I feel alive and the world I'll turn it inside out - yeah
And floating around in ecstasy
So don't stop me now don't stop me
'Cause I'm having a good time having a good time

I'm a shooting star leaping through the sky
Like a tiger defying the laws of gravity
I'm a racing car passing by like Lady Godiva
I'm gonna go go go
There's no stopping me

I'm burnin' through the sky yeah
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm trav'ling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic man out of you

Don't stop me now I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball
Don't stop me now
If you wanna have a good time just give me a call
Don't stop me now ('Cause I'm having a good time)
Don't stop me now (Yes I'm havin' a good time)
I don't want to stop at all

Yeah, I'm a rocket ship on my way to Mars
On a collision course
I am a satellite I'm out of control
I am a sex machine ready to reload
Like an atom bomb about to
Oh oh oh oh oh explode

I'm burnin' through the sky yeah
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm trav'ling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic woman of you

Don't stop me don't stop me
Don't stop me hey hey hey
Don't stop me don't stop me
Ooh ooh ooh, I like it
Don't stop me don't stop me
Have a good time good time
Don't stop me don't stop me ah
Oh yeah
Alright

Oh, I'm burnin' through the sky yeah
Two hundred degrees
That's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit
I'm trav'ling at the speed of light
I wanna make a supersonic man out of you

Don't stop me now I'm having such a good time
I'm having a ball
Don't stop me now
If you wanna have a good time (wooh)
Just give me a call (alright)
Don't stop me now ('cause I'm having a good time - yeah yeah)
Don't stop me now (yes I'm havin' a good time)
I don't want to stop at all
La da da da daah
Da da da haa
Ha da da ha ha haaa
Ha da daa ha da da aaa

Ooh ooh ooh oo

Instead of taking care of your own problems, make them the sun god's problems!

KILL EVERYTHING!

2.5 gigawatts!

Do not give up. The beginning is always the hardest.

Abe Lincoln may have freed all men, but Sam Colt made them equal.

Kill your past. you've already dammed your future.

If everyone is special, nobody is special.

I SLAUGHTERED BILLIONS, EVERY TUESDAY

EXTRA THICC

Pyth only grants strength to those who grant it others

Proper storys supposed to start at the beginning, aint so simple with this one

You know a game is hardcore when they use meat and chainsaws to make the music

It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum

I made one great mistake in my life: when I signed the letter to President Roosevelt recommending that atom bombs be made.

There's no I in team. But well, there's no U either. So I guess if I'm not on the team and you're not on the team, NOBODY'S ON THE GODDAMN TEAM! THE TEAM SUCKS!

Leadership is about getting other people to fire their weapons and stab people for you!

A doctor heals people, a medic makes sure they're comfortable while they die.

I used to know a person who wasn't around much. He was a good friend. He would come visit me sometimes, but, when he left he always said, "Don't say goodbye. If you don't say it you wont really be gone. you just aren't here right now.

Monsters rarely come at you unless they are twice your size, and three times your strength.

I don't know where i'm going from here, but I promise it won't be boring.

Asta La vista, Baby

The Gods gave us fire. But blowing stuff up? That was our idea.

It's said you never truly die until no one remembers you. Enjoy immortality Iwata, you earned it.

Its hard to win a argument against a genius buts its near impossible to win a argument against a idiot.

"I can't go on forever and I don't even want to try"

Come with me
And you'll be
In a world of pure imagination
Take a look
And you'll see
Into your imagination

We'll begin
With a spin
Traveling in
The world of my creation
What we'll see
Will defy
Explanation

If you want to view paradise
Simply look around and view it
Anything you want to, do it
Want to change the world?
There's nothing to it

There is no
Life I know
To compare with pure imagination
Living there
You'll be free
If you truly wish to be

If you want to see magic lands
Close your eyes and you will see one
Want to be a dreamer, be one
Anytime you please and please save me one

Come with me
And you'll be
In a world of pure imagination
Take a look
And you'll see
Into your imagination

There is no
Place to go
To compare with your imagination
So go there
To be free
If you truly wish to be

Living there
You'll be free
If you truly wish to be

If you spend enough time in the desert, a cheesy waterpark will look like the best thing to grace mankind.

I know your plan, and it is planned around my plan. So I will plan around the plan you are planning around my plan!

Your next line is ...

young joseph: your next line is OOOOOH NOOOOO!! old joseph: OH NO! young joseph: And then, after that, you're gonna say OH MY GOD! old joseph: OH MY GOD!

young joseph: And even after that, you're next line is gonna be HOLY SHIT! old joseph: HOLY SHIT! young joseph: And after that, you're gonna say SON OF A BITCH!

old joseph: SON OF A BITCH! young joseph: And finally after that, you're gonna say 'OH SHIIIT! old joseph: OH SHIIIT!

Joseph: Your next line is: OH NO! Old Joseph: I'm not falling for my own trick! Joseph: OH NO! Joseph: !

Joseph: Your next line is ZA WARUDO! Dio: ZA WARUDO- NANI?!?!" Joseph:Your next line will be "MUDA" and another "MUDA" followed by another one Dio: MUDA MUDA MUDA- NANI!?!?

There's action that makes you pump your fist in amazement, moments that make you "aww" from their gooey happiness. Things that you shudder to think about, and can bring a tear to the eye. It's not about quick jokes and entertainment anymore: it's about evolution towards something greater. It's about learning how to create something new inside the frame work we have.

You think it's about humor and being cool. But if you wrote something stronger, to touch the heart and mind and make a reader think, then isn't that enough? Expand your horizons far enough, put your mind to it, and you can do anything.

If we all prepare ourselves, look back, look forward, and make the choices we know are right, we can create something that will stand the test of time.

— Leviticus Wilkes on the Infinite Loops Misc. Thread

"Ora Ora, Ora Ora Ora."
-Star Platinum

ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA 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ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA 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ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA ORA

Life laughs at you when you are unhappy, life smiles at you when you are happy. But, life salutes you when you make others happy.

I AM CAPTAIN GORDON FREEMAN OF THE INTERGALACTIC HOUSE OF PANCAKES ORDERING YOU TO OPEN!

EARTH IS A MINERAL RICH PLANET!

GIVE PEACE A CHANCE! OR AT LEAST STAND STILL!

My butler will open the door, blow people away with a shotgun, and then close the door.

Well, looks like a job for ambassador pineapple.

I brush with death so often that I should start giving him high fives when I pass.

JoJo: The first manga that makes you say "Thank God, the Nazis arrived to save us!"

Getting old isn't a curse, it's an achievement!

NOBODY EXPECTS THE DOROTHINQUISITION!

"With this army of Pikachu's We'll take over the world! MUAHAHAHAHA!" - Nintendo

Sometimes you can do everything right and still fail

If you've thrown out the impossible, whatever is left, no matter how improbable, must be the truth

A dog has no use for fancy cars, big homes, or designer clothes. A waterlogged stick will do just fine. A dog doesn't care if you're rich or poor, clever or dull, smart or dumb. Give him your heart and he'll give you his. How many people can you say that about? How many people can make you feel rare and pure and special? How many people can make you feel extraordinary?

That's the problem. He's a brilliant lunatic, and you can't tell which way he'll jump. Like his game, he's impossible to analyze — you can't predict him, dissect him... which of course means he's not a lunatic at all.

Give a man a rocket jumper, he can jump for a short time. Teach him to rocket jump, he can jump for a lifetime.

I've taken my bows, my curtain calls, you've brought me fame and fortune and everything that goes with it, and I thank you all.

Alright I've been thinking.. When life gives you lemons, Don't make lemonade, Make life TAKE THE LEMONS BACK! GET MAD!! I DON'T WANT YOUR DAMN LEMONS, WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO DO WITH THESE? DEMAND TO SEE LIFE'S MANAGER! MAKE LIFE RUE THE DAY IT THOUGHT COULD GIVE CAVE JOHNSON LEMONS, DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? I'M THE MAN WHO'S GONNA BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN, WITH THE LEMONS, I'M GONNA GET MY ENGINEERS, TO INVENT A COMBUSTIBLE LEMON.. THAT BURNS YOUR HOUSE DOWN!

So, we're basically tearing canon apart to make a cannon from the salvaged parts. Welp, business as usual here at Spacebattles

The cats nestle close to their kittens, The lambs have laid down with their sheep. You're cozy and warm in your bed dear, Please go the fuck to sleep. The windows are dark in the town child. The whales huddle down in the deep. I'll read you one very last book if you swear You'll go the fuck to sleep. The eagles who soar through the sky are at rest, Like the creatures who crawl run and creep. I know you're not thirsty. That's bullshit. Stop lying. Lie the fuck down, my darling, and sleep. The wind whispers through the grass, hon. the field mice, they make not a peep. It's been thirty eight minutes already, Jesus Christ what the fuck? Go to sleep. All the nursery kids are in dreamland. The froggie has made it's last leap. Hell no, you can't go to the bathroom. You know where you can? The fuck to sleep. The owls fly forth from the tree tops. Through the air, they soar and sweep. A hot crimson rage fills my heart, love. Come on, shut the fuck up and sleep. The cubs and lions are snoring. Wrapped in a big snugly heap. Why can you do all this great shit, but you can't lie down and sleep? The seeds slumber beneath the earth now, And the crops that the farmers will reap. No more questions. This interview’s over. I’ve got two words for you, kid: fucking sleep. The tiger reclines in the simmering jungle. The sparrow has silenced her cheep. Fuck your stuffed bear, I’m not getting you shit. Close your eyes. Cut the crap. Sleep. The flowers doze low in the meadows And high on the mountains so steep. My life is a failure, I’m a terrible parent. Stop fucking with me, please, and sleep. The giant pangolins of Madagascar are snoozing As I lie here and openly weep. Sure, fine, whatever, I’ll bring you some milk. Who the fuck cares? You’re not going to sleep. This room is all I can remember, The furniture crappy and cheap. You win. You escape. You run down the hall. As I nod the fuck off, and sleep. Bleary and dazed I awaken To find your eyes shut, so I keep My fingers crossed tight as I tiptoe away And pray that you’re fucking asleep. We’re finally watching our movie. Popcorn’s in the microwave. Beep. Oh shit. Goddamn it. You’ve got to be kidding. Come on, go the fuck back to sleep.

When you have no time left, waste some.

SpaceBattles is Rambo on the outside, Disney Princess on the inside

There are two things certain in life. Death, and taxes.

I'm not sure who's suffering more, the fans that loved Monty so much, or Monty because this is really going to effect his productivity

While I appreciate you averting World War 2, I still can't believe that YOU FUCKED WITH HITLER, SHAGGED ROOSEVELT, HAD AN ORGY WITH REST OF THE WORLD POWERS, AND-AND- SOMEHOW ENSURED WORLD PEACE BY MUTUAL BLACKMAIL!

The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers

You don’t need no gun control, you know what you need? We need some bullet control. Men, we need to control the bullets, that’s right. I think all bullets should cost five thousand dollars… five thousand dollars per bullet… You know why? Cause if a bullet cost five thousand dollars there would be no more innocent bystanders.
Yeah! Every time somebody get shut we’d say, ‘Damn, he must have done something ... Shit, he’s got fifty thousand dollars worth of bullets in his ass.’
And people would think before they killed somebody if a bullet cost five thousand dollars. ‘Man I would blow your fucking head off…if I could afford it.’ ‘I’m gonna get me another job, I’m going to start saving some money, and you’re a dead man. You’d better hope I can’t get no bullets on layaway.’
So even if you get shot by a stray bullet, you wouldn't have to go to no doctor to get it taken out. Whoever shot you would take their bullet back, like "I believe you got my property.

Memories are bullets. Some whiz by and only spook you. Others tear you open and leave you in pieces.

It was something... the way a person's life picked up speed, the way a life was like a bullet aimed at one final target, impossible to slow or turn aside, and like the bullet, you were ignorant of what you were going to hit, would never know anything except the rush and the impact.

Try again; you have millions of alternatives. Fill yourself with the bullets of hope and you will kill failure with one shot.

Writing a first-draft battle scene is akin to real combat—chaos, confusion, and you must keep your cool as you fire word bullets downrange.

You're allowed to miss the people who were bullets to you, but you're not allowed to let them shoot you again

One word is enough to destroy an entire city provided that word is backed by anger. Drop down the bullets of anger; it destroys at the speed of light!

They were shooting far, and their accuracy suffered, but Nox didn't exactly have a lot of places to dance through the bullets. They came in number, like rain. You couldn't afford to get wet.

We are a volley of bullets, we are cannonballs. We are the tip of the sword.

Bullets an stuff be flying all over. It is something I simply cannot understand - why in hell is we doing all this, anyway? Playing football is one thing. But this, I do not know why. Goddamn.

If we fought wars with laughter instead of bullets, you would die laughing instead of just dying.

The world is full of comforting lies: that honesty and hard work are the keys to success, that justice will prevail, that if you can just hold out through today's hardship tomorrow will be better. Heroes go out and make them true.

When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace

You know that feeling you get when you see a pretty girl on the first day of school? You're not quite sure what to do but, your instincts just take over and you smile at her. And she smiles back. And suddenly the world is a brand new place. And your stomach is all full of twists and twirls? well boys, i got that feeling right now.

High hopes, Low expectations.

Mm ba ba de
Um bum ba de
Um bu bu bum da de
Pressure pushing down on me
Pressing down on you no man ask for
Under pressure that brings a building down
Splits a family in two
Puts people on streets
Um ba ba be
Um ba ba be
De day da
Ee day da - that's okay
It's the terror of knowing
What the world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow gets me higher
Pressure on people people on streets
Day day de mm hm
Da da da ba ba
Okay
Chippin' around - kick my brains around the floor
These are the days it never rains but it pours
Ee do ba be
Ee da ba ba ba
Um bo bo
Be lap
People on streets - ee da de da de
People on streets - ee da de da de da de da
It's the terror of knowing
What this world is about
Watching some good friends
Screaming 'Let me out'
Pray tomorrow - gets me higher higher high
Pressure on people people on streets
Turned away from it all like a blind man
Sat on a fence but it don't work
Keep coming up with love but it's so slashed and torn
Why - why - why?
Love love love love love
Insanity laughs under pressure we're breaking
Can't we give ourselves one more chance
Why can't we give love that one more chance
Why can't we give love give love give love give love
Give love give love give love give love give love
'Cause love's such an old fashioned word
And love dares you to care for
The people on the (People on streets) edge of the night
And loves (People on streets) dares you to change our way of
Caring about ourselves
This is our last dance
This is our last dance
This is ourselves
Under pressure
Under pressure
Pressure

The right man in the wrong place (with the right gun) can make all the difference in the world...

And the wrong man with the wrong gun in the wrong place makes for another school shooting...

Say hello to my little friend!

What's the point? We eat, we drink, we shit, my wife's a junkie waif, I'm a bad guy, The world needs bad guys, and apparently all that coke I've snorted has turned me into a goddamn philosopher.

You think i'm going to kill a mother and her kids? You think i'm a worm like you? You stupid fuck! Well look at you now!

The perfect being you said? Well, I have to tell you the honest truth as I see it. In this world, nothing perfect exists. It may be a cliche after all. But it's the way things are. That's precisely why ordinary men pursue the concept of perfection: it's infatuation. But ultimately I have to ask myself: What is the true meaning of being perfect? And the answer I came up with was: nothing. Not one thing. The truth of the matter is I despise perfection. If something is truly perfect, THAT'S IT. The bottom line becomes, there is no room for imagination. No space for intelligence or ability or improvement. Do you understand? To men of science like us, perfection is a dead end. A condition of hopelessness. Always strive to be better than anything that came before you, but not perfect. Scientist agonize over the attempt to achieve perfection. That's the kind of creatures we are. We take joy in trying to exceed our grasp, and trying to reach for something that, in the end, we have to admit may in fact, be unreachable. In other words, you may think that we operate on the same level, but you are wrong. The moment you started talking about perfection, you embraced an impossible concept, and had already lost to me. That is, of course, if you are a indeed a scientist at all.

Some people walk i the rain, others just get wet.

GOD AS MY WITNESS HE HAS SLAMMED HIM INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION!

I hope you brought, your wallets, 'cause the rent in hell gets paid in advance!

RESULTS! The world will only remember results!

Knowledge is a deadly friend if no one sets the rules

If we make it, we can all sit back and laugh, but I fear, tomorrow I'll be crying.

Those that are willing to lose, They're the ones that will ultimately gain everything.

Now let's see if we can inject Doom into the coding of the universe.

I believe in you Pocoloco, he may be a 100,00 year old perfect being, but, you're the man with 1/50,000,000 luck. You're gonna be just fine.

We are the makers of manners, Kate, and the liberty that follows our places stops the mouth of all find- faults... Make of your world what you wish it to be. Who knows, others may take heed.

There ain't no gentlemen to open up the doors There ain't no ladies now, there's only pigs and whores And even kids'll knock ya down so's they can pass Nobody's got no class! Whatever happened to old values? And fine morals? And good breeding? Now no one even says "Oops!" When they're passing their gas Whatever happened to class?

Boys use knives, Men use swords, Legends use saxophones

Technically we have no reason to not have international wars just be saxophone battles.

Everything is circular if it rotates.

They say a film is written 3 times.

The trick to suicide is procrastination. It's true. Give yourself a day. Go on. Do it. Set the date and time, then go out and get your affairs in order. Talk to friends and family, watch a movie, look at the news, try a new game or beat an old one, pick a fight or take a flight, just go out and do your bucket list. Just one day, the last day. Have you done it? Lived your last day just the way you wanted? Good. It's that time now. It's fine to say no, I'll take another day, that's where the procrastination comes in. It's where it always comes in. Live life.

There is no shame in failing. Only in not trying. I've failed at a lot of things in my life. I'm sure I'm going to fail a lot more in the future. One more failure won't break me. But giving up without a fight just isn't me. I'd much rather be the guy that threw himself into a lost cause and failed with gusto than the guy that meekly folded because everyone said "No, that's dumb and you're dumb for thinking that would work".

A dessert pizza with a gingerbread base! A Russian nesting pie! Or pizza bites inside of a pizza pocket inside of a calzone on top of a pizza! A pizza with the topping underneath! I’m just spitballing!

Sometimes I think about how I’ll never be able to witness to formation of an intergalactic empire, or interstellar travel, or the colonization of Mars, but then I watch this video, and I realize that even when I’m old I’ll experience dank memes that my grandchildren never will, so keep dancing Unkindled One, keep dancing.

Always remember, you are never alone. And that stupid jokes are the best.

If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.

Reality is an illusion, the universe is a hologram, buy gold, bye!

The report of my death was an exaggeration.

When I see children, real honest to god innocent children, I wish that we could all keep our innocence.

TURN THAT POOP INTO WINE!

Let me tell you something, Johnny. The most important weapon a man can have is his…

In the practical sense the difference between a Hero and a Fool is the result.
If you succed on doing something seemingly impossible then you're a Hero, if you fail then you were a fool.

Even if the intention and effort were the same.

“Doesn't matter what the press says. Doesn't matter what the politicians or the mobs say. Doesn't matter if the whole country decides that something wrong is something right.
This nation was founded on one principle above all else: The requirement that we stand up for what we believe, no matter the odds or the consequences. When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world -- "No, YOU move.”

To me, Fate is nothing more than the combination of people's decisions. You may not know what kind of pizza a guy in Brazil will want today but that will eventually effect you.

Music doesn't lie. If there is something to be changed in this world, then it can only happen through music.

A bullet might have your name on it, and a grenade might be addressed "To whom it may concern", but a Nuke has "ATTN: ALL" on it.

BE THE ROUND BUTT WORDS WILL MAKE OUT PRAY THE GAY AWAAAAAAAAAAY SOMEBODY IN TUCSON EVEN FARTEEEEEEDDD

Elements of the gungeon universe: Fire, Wind, Electricity, Poison, Water, Ice, Cheese.

Only in Gungeon can you play a bullet that fires a gun that is a bullet that fires guns that fires bullets at enemy bullets that have guns that fire bullets

This is a Mad Duck. It may not look like it (probably because it's trying to hold in its wrath), but it is madder than any incarnation of an angry Donald Duck.

Local Rodent Gets Dragged Down to the Depths of Hell, Snorts 16 Blocks of Spice and Goes on a Drug-Fueled Rampage Against Innocent Mr. Skeltal More news at 11.

Look lady, I don't know you and you don't know me, but we're the only two sane ones left in this messed-up world. Or, maybe the rest of the world's okay and we're the ones losing our marbles.

Random funny things

-0-50 OR SO AWESOME WAYS TO MAKE YOUR TEACHER WANNA BACKHAND YOU!!-0-

1. Walk into the classroom like a super spy. (keep your back on the walls as you walk, point your finger up like a gun, look around with shifty eyes, hum the mission impossible theme, etc.)

2. After everything your teacher says, ask why continuously.

3. If your teacher is yelling at a classmate, wait for them to finish their tantrum then ask” DOES SOMEBODY NEED A HUG??” very loudly.

4. If your teacher starts blowing up at you for saying that, simply reply, “wow I can tell you’re a blast at parties”

5. Sit in a corner and wait for everyone to stare at you. When they do, grab your head and scream “ THE LIGHT! MAKE IT STOP! ARGH IT BURNS!!”

6. Flick pieces of paper around the class.

7. When your teacher tells you to stop, cross your arms and say, “Your racist against paper aren’t you.”

8. Don’t do your Homework.

9. When your teacher asks you why you didn’t do your homework say “I dropped it while beating up this guy for saying you’re the worst teacher ever.” then sit there and smile sweetly.

10. When you have a supply teacher, wait for them to write their name on the board. Then when they say hello my name is Mr./Mrs (insert name here), you stand up and say “PROVE IT!”

11. When your teacher asks why you were late say, “My goldfish died.” Then burst into tears.

12. When handing in your homework, write "This paper will self-destruct in 5 seconds." at the bottom.

13. When you leave the class bow and say, “May the force be with you, young one.”

14. When the teacher turns the light off, start singing opera as loud as you can. When they turn the light back on, look around pretending to be confused.

15. Whisper to the person next to you. When the teacher comes up behind you, scream “OMG GET AWAY! RAPE! RAPE! RAPE!!”

16. Walk into class dancing the Macarena

17. Tell your teacher you heard the other teachers talking about him/her in the staff room

18. Raise your hand and say "I totally agree!" after everything your teacher says

19. Spend the whole lesson trying to lick your elbow

20. Speak in French.

21. Come late to class in a Spider-Man costume; say there was "a disturbance”

22. When they tell someone to turn around have everyone in class do it as well

23. "The homework’s due now? Oh, give me a minute then."

24. Hand in an essay where every word is misspelt.

25. Run in the room screaming, “THE WORLD IS GOING TO END!”

26. When the teacher asks you why you are late, say, “The queen is never late, everyone else is simply early."

27. When a teacher asks you a question, say, “I’m sorry, the brain you tried to reach has been disconnected, please leave me alone or try again later, thank you.”

28. When the teacher turns on the overhead projector, scream “AAH MY EYES!!”

29. Tell yourself knock-knock jokes, then laugh loads.

30. Hide under your desk and yell “THE SKY IS FALLING!”

31. When someone knocks on the door, shout “OH NO, THEY’RE COMING FOR ME!”

32. Bring in a 7th Grader and says he’s your new pet.

33. In your technology lesson, when the teacher asks you what you are making, say a nuclear bomb.

34. When your teacher asks you a question, just stare at them.

35. Constantly talk to yourself in a low voice.

36. Purposely fall off your chair and make a big scene about it.

37. If you’re playing a really boring game, make a big deal if you win.

38. Glue all their scissors together.

39. Make paperclip jewellery. I.e. necklaces, earrings, etc…

40. Pull out one strand of someone’s hair and yell “DNA!”

41. Wear a sticker or a badge that says ‘I am retarded’

42. Talk to a pen.

43. Put your hand up in a test and wait for your teacher to come over. When they whisper what’s wrong, yell “NO I WON’T MAKE OUT WITH YOU AFTER CLASS!”

44. Yell “LIAR!” to everything they say.

45. Smile. All the time.

46. Draw a tiny black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, “It’s spreading, IT’S SPREADING!”

47. When a substitute teacher is taking the register, say everyone is missing. Then, if they ask who you are, say ‘Your worst Nightmare’

48. When you know the answer, bounce up and down and go "OOOHH I KNOW THIS!!"

49. When a teacher calls on you say, "I forgot." To every question she asks.

50. If you have to blow your nose in class, blow your nose to the tune of your favorite song.

ADDITIONALS

51. When the teacher is not facing you, get the whole class to move their desks forward towards the him/her!

52. Hum throughout the lesson, but make sure you do not get caught!

53. When a teacher asks you a question... Reply "ERM, COMPUTER SAYS NOOO!!"

54. When the teacher makes a statement, stand boldly and shout "I OBJECT!!"

55. REPEAT the last word the teacher says but say it much louder!

56. While the teachers back is turned, everyone swaps seats!

57. If you are sure you haven't passed the test, write your phone number at the end with a heart!

58. When you hear a Police car siren from outside, run around screaming in the classroom shouting "Oh no, they're here. Oh my gosh. @#!*% . @#!*% . @#!*% . What do I do? Miss/Sir you have to help me! Oh gosh. They must have found the body! HELP!"

59. When it's your turn to answer a question... Shout "NEXT!"

60. When they tell you to do something, shout back "Yeah? YOU AND WHAT ARMY?!"

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through say, "PICK ME, PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed...
or if you might do these...
MUHAHAHAHAHA...

this is the Fanfiction Dictionary!

Fanfic: Fanfic is a shortening of Fanfiction, a story based on, inspired by, or taken place in a franchise not owned by the author.

Penname: the author's name on Fanfiction. Just be sure it sounds cool... because if you're good it'll be everywhere.

DS: shortening of Dare Show. a Dare Show is a very fun torture-type book, based on dares sent in by readers through reviews.

TF: shortening of Transformation Fic. often seen in Pokémon, but other franchises may have a few.

Community: an author's collection of Fics based on the same topic. if you're on it, you're most likely awesome.

Profile: an author's profile, or biography, is where he or she can post updates and notices about stories, some information about himself or herself, and stuff like this. Very fun }3

Post: a story, list, or funny thing/s that are commonly on a profile. To find an author with a lot of posts is to find a diamond in a desert, especially a profile long enough to take hours to finish.

Dead Account: A Dead Account is someone who has abandoned Fanfiction for personal reasons but still keeps the stories up. Do not expect updates.

Update: Halleluiah! an Update is an added chapter to a fanfic. they can be common or rare, depending on the story itself. for instance, a story with short chapters is going to be updated often.

Follower: a person that receives updates for the story. it may or may not be a favorite for the follower, but Favorites are shown on the profile.

From Reevee21 :

This is why Humans are doomed to die because of Stupidity:

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?) (Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(AHAHAHA yea, lets keep knives out of our kid's stomachs! HA!)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(oh good, I hoped something with the word 'nuts' on it would have nuts!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one..)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.4.all.the.emo.boyz, WritingRocks6, Bubble Blower, panache2005, .Dr1v3n t0 1n5aN1Ty., Serenity.Jones, crystalshake, KOIZUMI MICHIYO, Eeveeninja77, PhantomGirl12, StarSapphireWolf, Black Rose Hokaru, Song Of Hope, Colorici74, DragonFang2011, BlackCatNeko999, SleepyWolf2365, Ninja-Werewolf-1699, bayboo20, Jessicup711, Reevee21, Doctor Homicide 157

When in doubt, push random buttons!

There are three kinds of people: those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

Some people are like Slinky's. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Don't knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run--he hates that.

Best excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.

Dear math,
I am not a therapist, solve your own problems.

When life gives you lemons, keep them cause hey, free lemons.

Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.

I have not yet begun to procrastinate.

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the Frisbee getting bigger?" Then, it hits me.

I don't suffer from insanity . . . I enjoy every minute of it.

WARNING: Do NOT walk in my footsteps . . . I tend to walk into walls and off the occasional cliff.

There are three kinds of people in the world: those that can count, and those that can't.

The world is full of crazy people. They made me their leader.

You're just jealous because we act retarded in public and people still love us.

Slinky escalator = endless fun

People tell me I'm weird and I say, "You just figured that out?"

Best friends are the people that know all about you and still put up with you.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile, and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

I dream of a better tomorrow- where chickens can cross roads and not have their motives questioned.

I don't have a short attention span, I just - ooh, a kitty!

I'm not insane . . . I just do whatever the voices tell me to.

I don't obsess; I think intensely.

At my lemonade stand, I used to give the first glass free and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

The statistics of insanity is that one in every four Americans is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If it's not them, it's you.

The buddy system is essential to survival; it gives the enemy something else to shoot at.

If at first you don't succeed, don't try skydiving.

Normal people scare me... but not as much as I scare them.

I stopped fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now.

It is better to keep your mouth shut and make people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

I wasn't calling you names. I was stating the obvious.

I'm sick of all this talk about vampires and werewolves. What we really need is a good book about unicorns.

I'm not cynical. Everything just sucks.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.

That which doesn't kill you... will probably try again.

The difference between brilliance and stupidity is that brilliance has its limits.

I respect your opinion. I just think it's stupid.

You have the right to remain silent, so please just shut up.

I'm one of those bad things that happen to good people.

I didn't slap you! I just gave you a high five in the face.

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

A word to the wise isn’t necessary. It's the stupid ones that need the advice.

I'll try being nicer when you try being smarter.

Ah... Medieval Times. When boys opened doors for girls instead of trampling them on their way out. Those were the good old days.

I didn't choose the fandom life. The fandom life crawled from the depths of hell, grabbed me in a chokehold, and dragged me into the flames. But hey, it's actually kind of fun down here...

Learn from me. I am wise. No I'm not. Overlook me. Don't. Are you confused? No, you're not. I am happy. You are sad. No, I'm sad. You're not happy. You are happy. I'm confusing. You are confused. Now it makes sense. Ha.

Smile... even though it freaks other people out.

There's a fine line between sanity and insanity. I believe I crossed it several hundred miles back.

Fate drove me here, then told me to get out of the car.

When there's an awkward silence... "FOR NARNIA!"

They told me I could become anything. So I became a rock.

Bookstores are one of the only pieces of evidence we have left that people are still thinking.

I ran with scissors. And lived.

I did what they said and took the road less traveled –– now where the heck am I?

An apple a day keeps the doctor away –– if well aimed.

DRINK COFFEE! Do stupid things faster with more energy!

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it's gone.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Did you know sarcasm is your body's natural defense against stupidity?

Don't follow me. I'm lost too.

Don't mess with me. I've got a stick.

Smile, because I have no idea what is going on!

Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable if chocolate comes from cocoa beans, and all beans are vegetables?

One way to figure out how things work –– push all the buttons!

What is this normal you speak of? Is it contagious? Stay away! I might catch your normal!

Without those blonde moments, life would be so dull.

When women are depressed, they eat chocolate or go shopping. When men are depressed, they invade another country. It's a whole different way of thinking.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.

Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional...

Cheese... milk's leap toward immortality.

If you say "gullible" really slow, it sounds like "oranges"!

Without ME, its just AWESO.

Come to the nerd side. We have pi!

The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... and spiders.

On a scale of 1 to 10, what's your favorite color in the alphabet?

There is a fine line between numerator and denominator.

Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
I hate rhyming.
Zebra.

The following statement is true.
The previous statement is false.

The cactus wants a hug.

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

Excuse me, have you seen my sanity? I think I lost it.

I see regular people!

Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.

Silence is golden and duct tape is silver. You choose.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

I'm so gangster. I carry a squirt gun.

10 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity.

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

3. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

4. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For Smuggling Diamonds"

5. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

6. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

7. Specify that your drive-through order is "To Go."

8. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

9. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

10. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...Copy and Paste this into your profile!!

Copy and Paste if you LOVE to laugh (even if at yourself)

LLLLLLLLLL --_--_--_--_--_--_OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--_--LLLLLLLLLL--_--_--_--_--_--_

LLLLLLLLLL --_--_--_--_--_--_OOOOO--_--_--_--_ OOOOO--_--LLLLLLLLLL--_--_--_--_--_--_

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL_--_--_OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--_--LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Imagine these ideas in a 2nd grade or younger setting.

TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America .

MARIA: Here it is.

TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?

CLASS: Maria.

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

TEACHER: Glen, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLEN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLEN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie... Always say, 'I am.'

MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand. (I wouldn't either!)

TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher.

Birth Months:

JANUARY:
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people's flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.

FEBRUARY:
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

MARCH:
Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.

APRIL:
Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.

MAY:
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.

I was born in May, hopefully I don't die here

JUNE:
Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.

JULY:
Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

AUGUST:
Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride in oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.

SEPTEMBER:
Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people's mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.

OCTOBER:
Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to take things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.

NOVEMBER:
Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.

DECEMBER:
Loyal and generous. Sexy. Patriotic. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Short tempered. Changing personality. Not egotistic. Take high pride in oneself. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical

AND NOW, A VERY INPORTANT MESSAGE FROM SAPHRIABRIGHTSCALE! VERY INPORTANT! READ IT, OR ELSE!
THIS ONE'S FOR THE WRITERS!:

If you're creating fanfics, press 1. If you're reading them, press 2. If you're a flamer, don't press anything cause I think you should stop thinking negatively and look on the good side! . . . Just kidding! . . . but seriously, if you do nothing but flame so much you almost burnt your house down, then you have GOT to stop and say something nice!

I may not have the best stories, but I know where the worst are. I mean it has the following unattractive qualities:

OOC-ness: it means out of character. Examples: Astrid being girly girly, Hiccup being a selfish jerk, Snotlout being smart, Ruffnut being nice to her brother, Stoick sipping tea while knitting some oven mitts, Toothless sharing his fish with the Terrors . . . get the idea?

Mary Sue: an OC that's waaaay too perfect like: she's beautiful, smart, has amazing powers without even having to train, she's just . . .*gags* PERFECT! It's too unrealistic. Remember, it may be fiction, but it's only good if the people can actually UNDERSTAND.

Bad Grammar: I know the English language is pretty hard language . . . but that's what spell checks for! And beta readers (FYI, if you want me, just let me know!)

Author's notes/AN: we all put them there to say "hope you liked it, don't forget to review please..blah blah blah", but none should ever be more than the chapter itself or be inserted while the chapter's going on. EXAMPLE: And he grabbed her hand and told her he loved her (AN: omg wasn't that like so cute!)

Cliched plots: Truth or Dares, chat rooms

Saying it's your first fic: Oh my goodness that totally means I have to love it! Not. We're going to criticize you the same way whether it's your first fanfic or thousanth. Capeshe?

Begging for Reviews: *raises hand in surrender* yeah I'm guilty of that, I admit it, but I'm gonna be more careful now! Begging for them like "REVIEW OR I'LL CUT MYSELF" is like: wow . . . no pressure in that at all. You don't seem crazy/desperate at all! (please tell me you found the sarcasm)

"NO FLAMES PLEZ": saying that already makes people think the story is gonna suck. And it's like tattooing on your story to flamers "COME AND FLAME IT!"

"Sooory cudn't think of a title"- ??????? No comment . . .

Bad Summary consists of:

A) Chatspeak. Example: "Hiccup and Astrid go out on a date but OH NO Alivin the Treacherous came and killed them." TIP: the way you present your summary is probably the way your story is written. When you write like the one above, people are probably gonna think that's the way the story's written. And they'll probably not read it. :(

B) "Sorry...I suck at summaries...just read it!": repeat after me: The summary box is your friend. It's there for a reason. USE IT!

C) HICCSTRID HICCSTRID ALL THE WAY!: Now, while Hiccstrid's a big fan fave, you gotta say WHAT the story is about, what're they gonna do, etc. But not too much; leave 'em in suspense! MUAH HA HA HA HA! . . . no but if you get them curious they might read it. Sooo . . . yeah.

D) Summary's inside: again, the summary box is there for a reason.

Okay guys, I'd hate for you guys to be thinking "Wow, who does she think she is?" Well, I'm just trying to help the kids not read horrible fanfics and in the future make them too. So please: think of the children.

And guys, if you think my stories contain any of the above and think I'm being a total hypocrite: PM me or write in a review. If you flame me . . . yeah I'll be pretty bummed but I'll try to look at the ways that person's trying to help me. :)

HERE'S A KEY FOR FF TALK!
AU- Alternate Universe
OC- Original Character
OOC- Out of Character
Mary-sue- an all around perfect OC that ruins the whole story.
Gary-Stu: a male version of a Mary-Sue
CC- Constructive criticism
Flames- a comment or review that only points out faults and is stated harshly.
IC- In character
AN- Author's note
R&R- Read & review
POV- Point of view
FYI, I'm gonna try my best not to flame or anything like that, but if your story sucks, and you're being arrogant or whatever *coughcough, I WILL let you know, and I won't hold back. K? (but since I hate swearing, I'll try to refrain from that too)
END OF INPORTANT MESSAGE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION.

Ways to Annoy people at the cinema:
Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"
Go, "Oooooh . . ." whenever anyone kisses.
Clap when the good guy gets killed.
During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"
Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"
Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.
Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.
Yell out what is going to happen.
Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.
Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.
Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.
Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.
Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.
Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.
Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.
Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino . . .)
Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.
Try to start a wave.
Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.
Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.
Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"
Sing with the theme music.
Bring and use your own air freshener.
At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."
Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.
Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.
Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.
Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"
Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.
Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.
Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.
When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"
Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.
Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"
Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.
Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.
Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"
Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.
Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.
Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.
Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.
Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.
Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.
Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"
Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"
Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"
Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer's name is going to be said.
Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.
Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.
Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.
Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the ending.

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been
with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth
records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing
when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't
always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than
you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing
regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using
mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,
only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that
they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It
declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to
administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform
parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband;
churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their
victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar
in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize
that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and
was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife,
Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To
Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized
he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the
majority and do nothing.

This was written by Riku Uzumaki, NOT me. (But I shall miss him...)

What Kind of Gamer Are You?
Are you an AMATEUR video game player, or are you HARDCORE? Look at this list and see.

1. An AMATEUR gamer finds a friend to trade his Pokemon with. A HARDCORE gamer buys two games and two consoles and trades with himself.

2. An AMATEUR gamer plays Star Fox 64 wherever the levels lead him. A HARDCORE gamer finds out how to play all the levels.

3. An AMATEUR gamer says the level system in World of Warcraft indicates how strong and experienced you are. A HARDCORE gamer says it is synonomous with your reputation.

4. An AMATEUR gamer (assuming he's not in Japan) waits until the next game is available in his own country, with just a sampling of rumors and information when he comes across it by accident. A HARDCORE gamer orders the game from Japan itself, whether he can read Japanese or not.

5. An AMATEUR gamer takes a surprising character development with a quick, barely emotional, "That was unexpected." A HARDCORE gamer writes nasty e-mails to the developers for ruining their beloved characters.

6. An AMATEUR gamer sees the game in its own context, taking other games in the series into account only when it's a direct sequel/prequel. A HARDCORE gamer will criticize a game for not being as good as another for the most nonessential technical aspects, especially if said game was created for an older console.

7. An AMATEUR gamer never goes higher than T (and hardly even reaches T). A HARDCORE gamer never goes lower than M.

8. An AMATEUR gamer defends against the video game violence myth by noting other contributing factors. A HARDCORE gamer says video games are saints and would never harm a fly (unless accidentally dropped on one).

9. An AMATEUR gamer knows these names: Pac-Man, Mario, Sonic, Mega Man. A HARDCORE gamer knows these names: Travis Touchdown, John Marston, John "Soap" MacTavish, Wander. (Had to look these up. Not easy.)

10. An AMATEUR gamer plays for fun. A HARDCORE gamer treats the game with a life-or-death seriousness.

Ten Ways to Annoy Non-Zelda Fans:
1. Yell, "RUN! THE REDEADS ARE COMING!" at very random, inappropriate times.
2. Call every Siberian husky you see "Link." if said dog responds, ask for the whereabouts of Midna.
3. Assign everybody a Zelda character. ("You're a lot like Link, you know that?")
4. Don't talk. Just yell "HIYAH!" and poke people with sticks. If possible, wear green. In short, act EXACTLY like Link.
5. Tell everyone that the spirit of Zelda is in front of them; procede to have a conversation with "Zelda's spirit."
6. If anyone asks your name tell them "I'm Shadow Link; currently possessing (Your name)'s body.
7. Stare out a window. If anybody asks, tell them "I'm sure the man out there is trying to get the Triforce!"
8. Try to kill your own shadow.
9. Draw the symbol of the Triforce on your hand; try to pass yourself of as either Link, Zelda, or Ganondorf.
10. When in some place creepy, sing/hum/play Ganondorf's theme

Things I will not do in the Mushroom Kingdom... (Originally Created By Cloud Dreamer Girl) (Edited by TNFG and Cloud Dreamer Girl)

1. I will not tell Bowser that he's the evolved form of a squirtle

2. I will not scream BOWSER at the top of my lungs in the middle of Toad Square...

3. I will not eat a peach in front of Peach's face nor will I destroy a daisy in front of Daisy...

4. I will not tell goombas that Mario is going to get them in their sleep...

5. I will not eat a mushroom in front of Toad

6. I will not ask Mario how Rosalina is doing nor will I ask Daisy how things are going with Mr. L...

7. I will not shout THE GREEN THUNDER or any of his "other" catch phrases in front of Luigi's face.

8. I will not hum the super man theme song when I use the star power up that grants you the ability to fly

9. I will not hum the Mario Bros. theme song while walking around the Mushroom Kingdom

10. I will not ask Mario if the Great Gonzales is planning to make a comeback any time soon

11. It is not acceptable to serve Koopasta to a Koopa-Troopa

12. I will not have a simile-making contest with Dimentio.

13. I will not tell Fawful I know where The Dark Star is.

14. I will not tell Fawful that The Dark Star is underneath Dimentio's hat.

15. I will not tell Fawful that Dimentio is more insane than he is after informing The Dark Star is underneath his hat.

16. I will not push Bowser and Mario when they are mad at each other inside of Luigi's Haunted Mansion and bet on who destroys the mansion first from fighting.

17. I will not lock Luigi without his Poltergust 3000 inside of Luigi's Haunted Mansion just to see him run around like mad.

18. I will not order Mr. L to insult Dimentio's face just to make obsessive fangirls mad.

19. I will not compare Bowser Jr. to 'Mini-Me' in front of Bowser.

20. I will not question the logic of the Mario-Verse.

21. I will not steal Ludwig's piano and sell it on eBay to obsessive fangirls.

22. I cannot give Geno to Pinocchio's father.

23. I will not eat Mallow no matter how much he looks like a yummy marshmellow

24. Do not give Vivian, Goombella, Ms. Mowz, or Flurrie love-letters that are falsely addressed from Mario.

25. Also, don't send love-letters falsely addressed from Luigi to Princess Éclair.

26. It is impossible to convince Pennington that 'Luigi' is actually Mario.

27. It is also impossible to convince Pennington that he stinks when it comes to solving crimes.

28. Nimbi people are not Canadians from South Park.

29. I will not use 'faucet-face' as an insult to the Mario Bros.

30. I will not quote from old Super Mario World episodes.

31. I will not speak of the live-action Super Mario Bros. Movie

32. I cannot name a Piranha Plant Steve.

33. I cannot name Piranha Plants ever.

34. I will not give the location of Luvbi's prince to Luvbi.

35. I will not tell Beldam and Marylin that Vivian is better than both of them. No matter how true it is.

36. I will not sing the SMRPG song every time I walk through Geno's Forest.

37. I will not do the things listed in '10 Ways To Tick Dimentio Off'

38. I will not to record Dimentio's reaction after doing the things listed in '10 Ways To Tick Dimentio Off'

39. I will not lie to Waluigi and say that he has more fangirls than his rival.

40. I will not refer to eating shrooms and getting refreshing herbs as 'getting high'

41. I should not point out the fact to the characters that people write stories about them every day.

42. I will not put their reactions on Youtube after pointing out the fact that people write stories about them every day.

44. I will not insult the Koopa Bros. about being copies of The Mutant Ninja Turtles.

45. I will never make fun of Luigi for cross dressing.

46.I will not introduce guns and atomic bombs to Bowser's army.

47. I will not set fire to Mario in paper form.

48. Mr. L and Luigi in the same place at the same time does not mean that there is a time paradox. It's the end of the world.

49.Do not feed the fangirls.

50. I will not tell Toadsworth that he will never find a girlfriend.

51. I will not pull a spike off of Bowser's shell and use it to pick my teeth

52. It is considered rude to steal the Koopaling's wands

53. I will copy and paste this to my profile to inform everyone

A man went out to buy a horse. He found one that he liked, but then the man who was selling the horse said, "This horse is special. This horse is a Christian horse."

"How so?" asked the man.

"Well," explained the seller, "when you want him to go, you have to say 'praise the Lord'. And when you want him to stop, you have to say 'amen'."

"Okay," said the man, and paid for the horse.

When he went home to ride the horse, he got on. "Giddyup!" he said, but nothing happened. Then he remembered the horse seller's words, and then said to the horse, "Praise the Lord."

Immediately the horse took off in a gallop. The man hung on for dear life as the horse sped away, and gasped when he saw a steep, high cliff fast approaching. "Whoa!" he shouted. The horse just kept going. Then the man remembered what the horse seller had said, and commanded the horse, "Amen!"

The horse skidded to a stop a mere two feet away from the cliff's edge. The man was so overjoyed that, without thinking, he shouted, "Praise the Lord!"

A woman received a call that her daughter was sick.

She hurried to the pharmacy to get medication, got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys inside.

The woman found an old rusty coat hanger left on the ground. She looked at it and said "I don't know how to use this to help."

She bowed her head and asked God to send her some help

Within five minutes a beat-up old motorcycle pulled up, driven by a bearded man who was wearing an old biker skull rag.

He got off of his cycle and asked if he could help. She said: "Yes, my daughter is sick. I've locked my keys in my car. I must get home. Please, can you use this hanger to unlock my car?"

He said "Sure." He walked over to the car, and in less than a minute the car was open.

She hugged the man and through tears said "Thank you SO much! You are a very nice man."

The man said "Lady, I am NOT a nice man. I just got out of PRISON yesterday. I was in prison for car theft."

The woman hugged the man again sobbing, "Oh, thank you, God! You even sent me a professional!"

School – 1953 vs 2013:

Scenario: Jack goes rabbit shooting before school, pulls into school parking lot with rifle in gun rack.

1953: Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack's rifle, goes to his car and gets his rifle & chats with Jack about guns.

2013: School goes into lock down, Star Force called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his ute or gun again. Counsellors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.

1953: Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.

2013: Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario: Robbie won't be still in class, disrupts other students.

1953: Robbie sent to office and given six of the best by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.

2013: Robbie given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Robbie has a disability.

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbour’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.

1953: Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.

2013: Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has affair with psychologist.

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.

1953: Mark gets glass of water from Principal to take aspirin with.

2013: Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.

1953: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English and goes to college.

2013: Pedro's cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. AFRE files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro's English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a bullant nest.

1953: Ants die.

2013: Star Force, Federal Police & Anti-Terrorism Squad called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, Feds investigate parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny's Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.

1953: In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.

2013: Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.

...What kind of sick world do we live in!?

86 Hogwarts Rules:
1. No matter how good an Australian accent I can do, I will not do my Steve Irwin imitiation during Care of Magical Creatures
2. I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore."
3. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm
4. Seamus Finnigan is not after me Lucky Charms
5. I will not ask Lupin if it is his time of the month
6. I am not allowed to take Professor Flitwick's wand, hold it over my head, and laugh while he tries to reach it
7. Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time
8. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey
9. Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda
10. I will not refer to hypogriffs as "Horseybird"
11. Crucifixes do not ward off Slytherins and I should not test that
12. Professor Snape does not respond well to being called "Snookums"
13. Neither does he respond favorably to being called "Sev," "Snapey-poo," or "Debbie"
14. Dumbledore is not Santa, he does not wish for me to sit on his knee and demand presents, especially in June
15. I will not greet Professor McGonagall with "what's new pussy cat?"
16. I will not refer to "the Grim" as a nice doggy
17. I will not refer to Professor Lupin as a nice doggy
18. There is no bring a muggle to school day
19. When I apply for a job at the Ministry of Magic after graduating, I should not cite Fred and George Weasley as my greatest influence at Hogwarts
20. Citing Lord Voldemort probably isn't the best idea either
21. I will not refer to the accio charm as "The Force"
22. I will not sing "Defying Gravity" during Quidditch practice
23. There is no connection between Hitler and Voldemort
24. I am not allowed to declare an official hug a Slytherin day
25. I am not to wear my DEATH EATER AND PROUD OF IT! shirt to school
26. When in the presence of the Dark Lord, I will call him the Dark Lord not, "Snake face the Dark Lord Happy Pants
27. I am not allowed to ask any of the Malfoys if it's true that blondes have more fun
28. I am not to sing "We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!" when sent to the headmaster's office
29. I am not to hold my wand in the air before casting spells and shout "I..GOT...THE...POWER!"
30. When the Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I am not to point to the Dark Mark and yell "To the Batmobile, Robin!"
31. Or, "Thunder Thunder Thunder THUNDERCATS GO!"
32. I am not Voldemort's illegitamate love child
33. If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than fifteen seconds, I am to assume I'm not allowed to do it
34. I do not have a Cyberman Patronus
35. Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists
36. Taking red paint and writing creepy messages on the wall is not funny either
37. I will not use the Slytherin and Gryffindor first years as Christmas decorations
38. Using the Engorgio charm on certain parts of the anatomy is not permitted on school grounds, even for entertainment purposes.
39. It is generally accepted that cats and dragons can't interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory, not matter how wicked the result would be.
40. I will not write all my essays in red ink claiming it's blood
41. It's not appropriate to approach Cho wearing an "All the Good Looking Ones Die Young" t-shirt with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it
42. The Easter Bunny is not Jesus's Animagus form
43. I will not write forged letters home to the parents of Muggleborn children detailing the Satanic rituals they are learning.
44. Locking Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter in a closet together to see if they have hot gay sex is not appropriate
45. The four houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smartasses and the Junior Death Eaters
46. Teaching the first years to chorus in unison "the amazing bouncing ferret" whenever they hear the name Draco Malfoy is just wrong, funny, but wrong.
47. No matter what I say to the Dark Lord, I will never make him laugh
48. Murmuring "I see dead people" whenever I see one of the ghosts is stupid and was never funny
49. I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro, and it was not an honest mistake
50. I am not funny, no matter how much I make myself laugh
51. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball
52. I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter
53. I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick
54. I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar
55. I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 ball to Divinition
56. I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It is tasteless, tacky, and not a good money making strategy.
57. I am not allowed to make light saber noises with my wand.
58. I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals
59. I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucigenic mushrooms is and Extra Credit Herbology Project.
60. I am not allowed to use my socks to make the Slytherin House mascot.
61. I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and make bets about which house comes out alive
62. I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast
63. I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways
64. It is not necessary to yell "BURN!" everytime Snape takes points away from the Gryffindors
65. I will not use the phrase "Get a life" when talking to Voldemort
66. First years are not to be fed to Fluffy
67. I will not ask Harry Potter if his Voldie senses are tingling
68. I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning Myrtle and eye-full"
69. I will not make "OMGWTF" a spell
70. It is not necessary to yell "BAM" everytime I Apparate
71. I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways, not even on Halloween.
72. I will not poke Hufflepuff's with a plastic spoon, nor will I say that their colors suggest that they're covered in bees
73. "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge
74. House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers
75. I will not start every Potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion
76. I will not call the Weasley twins "bookends.''
77. I will not give Luna Lovegoode Coast to Coast AM transcripts
78. I do not have an Edward Cullen Patronus
79. I will not lick Trevor
80. Gryffindor courage doesn't come in bottles labeled "Firewhiskey"
81. I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween
82. It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously
83. I will not tell Sir Cadogan the the Knights Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel and have all students say "Ni" from all directions
84. I am not King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet
85. "To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice
86. I will not tell the first years that Snape is the voice of God.

Chugga: 'Instead of worrying about your problems, make them the Sun God's problems!'

Me: Apollo! Can you do my chores, homework, and buy me groceries! Thx!

Ra! I'm thirsty, fetch me some water!

Rest in peace Aku. You will always be remembered for being the best cartoon villain in the history of cartoons.

I have an army.
We have a Hulk!
And I have THE HIGHGROUND!

When you die in heaven, where do you go?

Where do Gordon Freeman and Jon Snow meet for drinks ? The Crowbar.

In Japan, the meaning of Christmas is, FRIED CHICKEN!

Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is: Old Joseph: Your next line is: Your next line is:

And FOX said, "Let there be light" and there was a shine.

If Each Gen. of Pokemon followed the Jojo Saga Format:
Part 1: Phantom Red
Part 2: Golden Tendency
Part 3: Sapphire Crusaders
Part 4: Diamond is Unbreakable
Part 5: Vento Bianco
Part 6: Mega Stone Ocean
Part 7: Moon Ball Run
Part 8: KeKecleon

「KILLER QUEEN」 DAISAN NO BAKUDAN「BITES ZA DUSTO」

The Joestar Family and the Secret Technique:

Joseph: The shot caller and the fastest runner as he's mastered this technique in his battle against the Pillar Men.
Johnathan: Genuinely confused and angered at Joseph- he starts chasing him down yelling him questions that question in his values of a man.
Jotaro: He saw this coming a mile away. All he does is shoot a quick "Yare yare daze" before going his own way.
Josuke: Has no idea what the fuck is going on- questioning the sanity of this man even at his prime and doubting that this man is actually his father. He'd either follow Jotaro or Joseph.
Giorno: He's a bit confused, but realizes questioning it would be MUDA. He goes his own way as well.
Jolyne: More or less the same reaction of Giorno's- she gives a quick "Yare yare daze" before following her father.
Gappy: Probably has a pretty hard time running. 4 balls makes everything hard. He might have to use Soft and Wet to get rid of those two balls for a while.
Johnny: "Hey, guys? A little help here? Guys?! GUYS!!! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE! ARE ALL OF YOU BLOODY INSANE?! CAN YOU NOT SEE THAT I'M IN A WHEEL CHAIR???" He'd definitely have the hardest time before Gyro takes the wheel chair and push it for him.

Heaven, Hell, & Tom Jones. The trifecta of human life

Army of the third REICHu

Comrades Pikachu! To the frontline! We have to defend the motherland!

THE POKEMON HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO LOSE EXCEPT FOR THEIR POKEBALLS SEIZE THE MEANS OF BATTLING FROM KANTO TO ALOLA LET US END THE GLOBAL TRADE SYSTEM AND HAVE A WORLDWIDE REVOLUTION!

MOBILIZE THE PIKACHU ARMY! THEY WILL NOT KNOW WHAT HIT THEM! WE WILL CONQUER AND RULE!

PC master race: I have an army
Console users: We have Segata Sanshiro.

Eh, PC is better, I'll go play that instead.

Choir of voices singing SEGATA SANSHIRO can be heard in the distance, getting louder

OH SHI-

The excrement is about to make physical contact with a hydro-electric powered oscillating air current distribution device at mach 2.

"We are the weak! We are the weak, just as we have always been! Yes, nothing has changed at all! The strong may imitate our weapons, but they will never master them! Because at the hearts of our weapons lies the cowardice born of almost humiliating weakness. This cowardice has given us the wisdom to escape from magic. This cowardice has given us the wisdom, born from learning, and the experience to predict the future itself! I say for the third time, we are the weak! We are the proud weak who have, throughout history, torn out the throats of those who sit back and boast of their strength! We declare now that we as Elkia’s 205th king… and Queen... have taken the throne! We hereby declare that we will live as the weak, fight as the weak, and as the weak we will destroy the strong! As we once were, and as we will always be. Accept the fact that we are the weakest race. Accept that we are the weakest race, one that can become anything, because we were born with nothing!"

We may have all come on different ships, but we're in the same boat now.

Welcome to the insanity. Here is your complimentary tin foil hat and a blueprint for how to stuff a Unicorn into a Saturn V rocket to send blasting into the celestial object of your choice.

Goats for Sale Massachusetts*Will Ship*

The Internet is a fabulous tool for fulfilling all your goat needs.

"Names have power, Ronald. Draco's parents named him that because they wanted him to be as strong and powerful as a dragon. I named you after a muggle god of food. His places of worship are marked by a giant yellow M, where they sell large quantities of food at reasonable prices." -Arthur Weasley-

Through action, a Man becomes a Hero
Through death, a Hero becomes a Legend
Through time, a Legend becomes a Myth
And by learning from the Myth, a Man takes action

if you try and little harder, maybe your nonsensical actually panicked attempt will sound like a delusional one, then you're only six steps away from mysterious!

Grandad Okuyasu! tell us a story!" "Hmm let me think...did granpapy ever tell you about the time I exploded and was put back together?" "Tell us grandad!" "Well it all started with my high school friend exploding...

BREAKING NEWS: Man kills evil demon from hell with 790 bees

Your Stand is like your asshole, you can't just go around showing it off to other people!

Basically what we've established here is that Mexican Bootleg Superman is amazingly awesome.

Chinese philosophy: MHappiness

Fuck the rail car, I AM THE RAIL CAR

When life gives you lemons:1) Don't make lemonade2) Tell life to take the lemons back3) Get mad4) Demand to see life's manage5) Make life rue the day they gave you lemons6) Have engineers make a combustable lemon7) Burn life's house down with the lemons.

This isn't just derailing canon.
This is derailing canon, disassembling the metaphorical train to make a railgun, melting the tracks down into slugs, and shooting the very premise of "following the plot" in the dick while screaming creative insults at it.

I love it.

Jojo Fans require someone to manually preform a ritual in order to wake us up. That person's legal name must be Wham, Whamuu, or something similar. - The Holy Jojoke

Welcome to Za weird Wardo of Jojo's. Here's your complimentary stand, Hamon exercise video, stone mask, and perfect red stone of Aija.

I'd like to point out that we are, in fact, having a serious conversation about a Looping Lorax, an orange furball with a huge moustache, and we are imaging him as a MLE hunter...I love this site.

This is SpaceBattles. I don't come for petty philosophical and rhetorical questions. I come to have wet dreams of interdimensional space fleets firing universes at one another while swordfighting God and trying to fuse angels and bananas together while epic music plays in the background for no apparent reason at all.

Why talk when you can SHOUT!? Why stand when you can POSE!? Why walk when you can LEAP!?

Jonathan: The Noble Gentlemen

Joseph: The Hilarious And Perverted Trickster

Jotaro: Edgelord & Badass

Josuke: Pretty Chill & Friendly Kid... If You Don't Piss Of His Hair, That Is... Also He's Kinda Childish...

Giorno: Gangster & Alucard (He Should Be JoJo's Alucard Anyways)

Jolyne: A Woman... A Manly & Dangerous One...

Johnny: Sarcastic Prick

Josuke 8: Classic Amnésia Character Trope

You prevented me from stopping you from coutnering my plan... But I planned it all along! This double agent that you actually mind controlled was ACTUALLY one of my most trusted men from which i erased all memories of crucial informations! Wait, so i'm on your side from the beginning? Yep.

There are 2 types of 12 yearolds in the world: The edgy hacks, and the Tidepod eating troglodytes.

Ash: Oh no it's raining! Brock: Hey I know! I'll use my frying pan, as a DRYING PAN! Misty: Darn we missed our plane to Hoenn! Brock: Hey I know! I'll use my frying pan as a FLYING PAN! Ash: *tries to open door to flying pan * It's locked! Brock: Hey I know! I'll just use my frying pan, as a PRYING PAN! Board the flying pan An hour later... Misty: Oh no! The flying pan is crashing! Brock: Hey I know! I'll use my frying pan as a DYING PAN!

Hartman :WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR GENDER ? TELL ME YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SCUM OF AMPHIBIAN SHIT !!! SJW: JUST AS YOU KNOW IM AM INDENTIFIED AS AN ATTACK HELICOPTER Hartman: HOLY DOG SHIT !!! WE GOT IN HERE A APACHE MODEL 1955 ATTACK HELICOPTER HERE HUH ??? WELL GET YOUR ROTOR-WINGED PIECE OF SHIT ASS OUT OF MY BELOVED CORPS HERE AND GO SHOOT SOME FUCKING VC IN THE MOTHERFUCKING AIRFORCE !!!

Hartman: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BULLSHIT ABOUT A WAGE GAP?! Feminist: MEN GET PAID MORE THAN WOMEN!1! Hartman: BULLSHIT, I DONT SEE YOU FIRING GUNS AND KICKIN' BITCHES! YOU WANT MORE MONEY, YOU BUST YOUR FUCKING ASS FIRST! Feminist: THIS IS WHY WE NEED FEMINISM! REEEE! Hartman: HOLY DOGSHIT, WE GOT A PIG IN THE HOUSE! SOMEONE GET MY SHOTGUN! WE GOT A BIG JUICY BITCH PIG TO HUNT! Feminist: DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY GENDER?! Hartman: YOU AIN'T GOT NO DICK SO YOU'RE A BITCH! AIN'T NO IN BETWEEN! ANYBODY WHO TELLS YOU OTHERWISE CAN GO FUCK THEMSELVES!

WHAT'S THE MATTER PRINCESS, TRIGGERED? WELL GET USED TO IT YOU PINK HAIRED COCK SUCKER BECAUSE I'LL BE HURTING MORE THAN JUST YOUR FEELINGS SOON ENOUGH.

We’re getting closer to running Doom on humans.

We need doom running in doom.

Make doom run on an old 1960s era nuclear launch computer. A new level of risk, dying in game launches a nuke at a random location on land. Could be a city, could be a plain, or it could be a mountain

Port Doom onto a potato.

Someone tries to port Doom into their DNA

next up: porting doom to time square mega screens

Running Doom on the star systems that caused the heat death of the universe

Scientist: We have found an amazing alien computer we will study it in hopes of recrati- Modder: HEY I got doom to run on it!

Doom on a treadmill? That's got to be a thing by now.

A guy got Doom go work as the controller hooked to a toaster and working on his Porsche 911, while DRIVING. The HORN IS SHOOT.

Some people say they can rip me off...maybe... *sniffs* ... maybe ... But I have yet to see someone who can rip off my music.

In Jojo's, a 14 year old births the corpse of Jesus Christ's skull.

Deadpool is so tragic, he travels around not with a supermobile or cool expensive jet or flying powers... he rides next to a routine indian cab driver talking about Life and Shit. Deadpool is SO tragic, he can't die, and he has to cope with the pain over and over and over again SO much that his coping mechanism has taken over the rules of reality. THAT'S how big his sense of humor is. THAT is how sad he is.

Mary Poppins is secretly one of Doctor Who's new incarnations. She can fly, her bag is a bigger on the inside than the outside. She never stays longer than she is needed, always helping those who need it. I'm sure there's more possible evidence but still interesting possibilities.

How to have the best roadtrip

1: Get on a school bus

2: Mutanize against the driver

3: Get worst driver to drive

4: Drive cross country

5: Drive into the Pacific ocean

6: Drive through Pacific ocean

7: End up in China

8: Drive through Asia and Europe

9: Say "fuck you physics" and somehow end up on the moon

10: Drive past Ursa Minor

11: Have a few Pan Galactic Gargle Blasters with Zaphod Beblebox

12: End up in a different dimension

13: Have a stand battle with the president of the United States over Jesus's corpse

14: Collect Jesus's corpse

15: Run over 36 Kars on Mars

16: Drive down the Highway to Hell

17: Drive up the Stairway to Heaven

18: Drive off the Stairway to Heaven

19: Somehow land exactly where you started

Two guys passive aggressively battling with saxophones

I remember at one meeting a fellow told a friend (a teacher) that bullying is needed to prepare kids for the real world.

his answer?

"In the real world, if am physically assaulted at work or in public, I call the fucking police and the individual repsonsible gets arrested. in the real world, a business that tolerates bullying loses all of its staff right before it gets nuked by the local labor board. Bullying doesn't prepare anyone for the real world, because the real world is a lot less tolerant of that shit."

In my experience, Nintendo has kind of gotten a pass from the PC community on the whole PC vs. Console thing.

PC: "RAW POWERRRRRRR!"

XB1/PS4: "EXCLUSSSSSIIIVVESSS!"

Switch: "Fun! :)"

It's just so gosh darn wholesome. It's like a little brother. It's not as strong or as fast as you but damn if he isn't adorable.

Slams you to the ground* *Jumps on you* ”jazz for your soul” *Plays a killer trumpet solo* “Wh-“ *Suddenly performs a JoJo* “DON’T QUESTION IT.” *Toots the trumpet four times* ”just embrace.”

And now, for something special https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwphQAoZEXw

One of my friends, as a small child, learned that his father had been doing a lot of chem stuff in the military, so being a precocious nine year old, walking into his father's room, while father was sleeping, far away from active duty in his dreams and screamed...

GAS GAS GAS!

Dad rolled out of bed, eyes closed, lashed his hand out for the gas mask, and before he was fully awake...

Smashed his nose with the alarm clock.

To this day, Father points out that nobody can doubt his love for his son; the boy still lives.

THE BROWNIES HAVE NEVER BEEN WRONG! I have, but the brownies haven't.

PART ONE Buddy, you're a big noise street gonna ban some Bud on your big disc kicking yaks over the play Wee wee rock you Wee wee rock you Buddy, you're a yard man tree gonna twirl some Mud on your fake disc waving York over the play Wee wee rock you Sing it! Wee wee rock you Buddy, you're a poor man rise gonna be some Blood on your big disc, grotty bet up into your plea Wee wee rock you Wee wee rock you Wee wee rock you Wee wee rock you

PART TWO Boy, make a Bane and then see a big may, You got mace, you base, can all ace, singin' Well, well Well, well Young man, hiding in the steak on the way, You got bliss, you base, wa banner all ace, Well, well, rock Well, well, rock Bold man, pleading with your ragers on May, You got mace, base, some butch you back base, Well, well Well, well Everybody, Well, well Well, well

Talking away I don't know what say it anyway Today's anoth day Shying away I'll be coming for your lo taaaaaaa meeeeee TAAAAAAAAAA OOOOOOOON i'll gooooooone TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO needless to say odds and ends tumbling away Slowly learning that life Say after me it's no better to be taaaaaaa meeeeee TAAAAAAAAAA OOOOOOOON i'll gooooooone TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO musical interlude Things that you say is it a life or worries away All the things I've got Shying awa I'll be coming for you. taaaaaaa meeeeee TAAAAAAAAAA OOOOOOOON i'll gooooooone TWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO (take on) (I'LL GONE) TAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Definitely decent Deku deems disgusting disparagement delivered displeasing distress.

Thinks Tenya tends to trespass towards tender topics.

Great Girlfriend grants grievance genuineness, gifts grand goal.

Iida’s idiotic intimate invasion inspires ironic inquietude.

Following feverish finagling, fiendish formation finally formed.

Circumstances considered, couple chases club chairman.

Says stopped speech seems sound, seek seminar sequel.

Prudish president post proposal pondering, permits past proceeding progress.

Couple considers condoms confusing, confesses considerable complications conducting contraceptive customs.

Straight shooter sees situation surfacing, stands scared shitless.

Erotic ensemble expresses entreaty.

Demonstrate devise direction directly.

Freakishly fast figure furiously flees

「Things That The United States Court System And Other Countries' Court Systems Would Define As Breaking The Laws Of The Land In A Way One Would Reasonably Consider To Be Filthy Or Covered In Dirt Done For Rightful Compensation By Another Party Partaking In This Transaction All Done With Due Intention」

「Partaking In Actions A Reasonable Person Would Find To Be Of the Erroneous Variety All While Taking The Necessary Steps To Be Paid In Full By Those Who Require These Actions To Be Done That Otherwise Would Not Be Able To Partake By Any Other Individual」

-Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap -Filthy Acts at a Reasonable Price -Disrespectable Acts at a Really Good Discount -Atrocious Actions done for Frugal Individuals -Despicable Performances at a Discounted Price of 9.99$ plus 5.99$ shipping and handling -Not Good Things Accomplish at Minimun Wage -Bad Stuffs at a Discounted Rate -Unreasonable Bad Acts such as theft and murder punishable under a court of law done by Criminals in order to gain a low sum of Money and agreed upon by both parties -Naughty Notions Negated at Neglectable Prices -Grimm Request at a Pretty Decent Deal -Tasks Deemed Unlawful by Society which would most definitely earn you a high level of hatred and disrespect of among people accomplished by an astoundingly low near insignificant level of payments -Disrespectful Unsanitary Behavior at a little to no Currency

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Ere we go, Pluz Ultra! by Unseen Lurker reviews

Sometimes, small things can have unforeseen consequences. Like the butterfly causing an hurricane. Or the nail costing a war. Or the snotling messing around where he shouldn't causing the rise of a different kind of hero... "Awigt den, come have a go, ya gits! Waaaaagggghh!"

Crossover - Warhammer & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 25,954 - Reviews: 133 - Favs: 346 - Follows: 406 - Updated: 14h - Published: 1/30 - Orks, Izuku M.

The Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord by ChangelingRin reviews

Throughout Hyrule's history there have been many villains, from Ganon to Zant. And with villains comes villainous cliches. Lots and lots of cliches. This is a list of those cliches and how to avoid them, told through the various hostile takeovers of Hyrule and all the things the conquerors did wrong. Welcome, reader, to the Top 100 Things I'd Do If I Ever Became An Evil Overlord.

Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 27 - Words: 16,075 - Reviews: 140 - Favs: 159 - Follows: 166 - Updated: 8/29 - Published: 8/21/2016 - Link, Ganondorf, Vaati, Zant

A Hunt Like No Other by Crazyscientist85 reviews

So it turns out that Vaults are scattered all over the galaxy. But what about Pandora? Had the planet run out of Vaults to open? Of course not. But have you ever wondered why the Eridians tried so hard to hide them? Well, the general idea is that some Vaults... should have never seen the light of day. And for good reason. Triple crossover (RWBY, Borderlands and Doom).

Crossover - Borderlands & RWBY - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Parody - Chapters: 42 - Words: 254,980 - Reviews: 55 - Favs: 115 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 8/28 - Published: 12/23/2017 - Ozpin, OC, Team RWBY, Team JNPR

Family by Major144 reviews

Simon gets the power of the crown, but he doesn't lose his sanity or Betty. The war happens and Simon and Betty find Marceline and raise her as their own. The new family face many difficult challenges. A story in which a hero will rise and help defeat a great evil in the distant future. A different Ooo will rise and take shape. Also there will be many crossovers.

Adventure Time with Finn and Jake - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 357 - Words: 954,168 - Reviews: 1694 - Favs: 313 - Follows: 277 - Updated: 8/27 - Published: 9/20/2014 - Finn, Marceline A., Betty, Simon P.

Dimensional Links by ChangelingRin reviews

Centuries after Demise was sealed in the Master Sword, he reforms himself to find that his Hatred Incarnations have been utterly useless. He decides to take things into his own hands-and in the process tears holes in reality itself. To save the Universe, the Goddesses turn to their last hope: the Hero. Except this time, they're not sending just one - they're sending all of them.

Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 60 - Words: 355,098 - Reviews: 1536 - Favs: 851 - Follows: 870 - Updated: 8/26 - Published: 3/18/2015

My Huntsman Academia by The Inkasters reviews

Dreams can become reality, even if under some unlikely circumstances. This is the story about how Izuku Midoriya became the world's greatest Huntsman. Written by: gorilla fingers. Extensively Edited by: Shovern and Wind-Waker. Originally a Play-By-Post Quest written on SpaceBattles. Cover by: OnlineArmadillo and Shovern

Crossover - RWBY & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 75 - Words: 571,787 - Reviews: 592 - Favs: 627 - Follows: 657 - Updated: 8/25 - Published: 8/11/2018 - Izuku M.

RWBY Loops by Leviticus Wilkes reviews

"Stuck repeating everyday? Bored out of your mind? With only your friends along for the ride? Why, it's just like school! Of course, the Infinite Loops are a lot more fun then Beacon Academy, as Ruby Rose is about to find out. Part of the Infinite Loops project.

RWBY - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 159 - Words: 2,251,531 - Reviews: 1105 - Favs: 1,396 - Follows: 1,327 - Updated: 8/24 - Published: 4/25/2015 - Team RWBY, Team JNPR

Sam & Max Presents: Mayhem In Musutafu City! by zelkova48 reviews

A string of unsolvable crimes have left the heroes of Musutafu City stumped and without a lead. So what do they do? Well, they call Sam & Max, Freelance Police! I mean, yeah, it's not the smartest decision they made, or the most sensible, or even one with the lowest mortality rating. But Sam & Max always get the job done, one act of indiscriminate nonsense at a time!

Crossover - Sam & Max & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 8 - Words: 25,926 - Reviews: 34 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 8/22 - Published: 6/11 - Toshinori Y./All Might, 1-A Students, Nezu/The Principal

My Abominable Monster Classmates Can't Be This Cute by Mallobaude reviews

Jaune had always wanted to go to a school to learn to battle the creatures of Grimm. But as a boy with no huntsmen training, no huntsmen knowledge, and no huntsmen transcripts, he had absolutely no chance of getting into a school like that legally. After scouring the darkest corners of the CCTNet, he finally found a lead. A place called Grimm Academy. Cover art by RKS-Kogiro.

RWBY - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 23 - Words: 193,320 - Reviews: 1833 - Favs: 2,488 - Follows: 3,040 - Updated: 8/21 - Published: 1/28 - Ruby R., Weiss S., Blake B., Jaune A.

Slayers by BakaOniisan reviews

Doom Slayer got tricked by the demons again and is sent to another world where he meets Goblin Slayer and his Party. He decide to search for the portal to Hell that sent him there and destroy it once he's back in Hell. The only clue he got is the weakest monsters that bow down to anyone stronger, like demons from Hell... His only clue are Goblins. Two slayers together for a quest!

Crossover - Doom & Goblin Slayer/ゴブリンスレイヤー - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 10 - Words: 34,792 - Reviews: 333 - Favs: 735 - Follows: 947 - Updated: 8/21 - Published: 10/27/2018 - Doomguy

Izu-Ju by Crossoverpairinglover reviews

It all started when a quirkless child gains the power to live his dreams from a chance encounter he never could have expected. However where one found the secret from the greatest hero on Earth, another got it from beyond the stars themselves. With the power to be a superhero for 10 minutes, Izuku Midoriya attends U.A to become a hero, and possibly figure out what his watch is.

Crossover - Ben 10 & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 20,666 - Reviews: 39 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 136 - Updated: 8/19 - Published: 6/1 - Izuku M.

Tribe of Fusions by PokeMaster64 reviews

Fusions, a rare phenomenon in the Pokémon world where a Pokémon is born with altered DNA, transforming them into powerful creatures. For a millennium, they were seen as a dangerous force and a threat to all life. Fusions, even to present day, have been ostracized from society. As they are feared for their power, is change still possible?

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Adventure - Chapters: 101 - Words: 977,186 - Reviews: 341 - Favs: 96 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 8/18 - Published: 12/10/2016

Saving a Lot of Data: The Pokémon Soul Silver Parody by SilverGate555 reviews

We always made the player character write down in a diary to save data. Now it's time to invade their privacy and see what exactly they were writing in that thing.

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 39 - Words: 123,853 - Reviews: 75 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 8/17 - Published: 2/15/2015 - Lyra/Kotone

Cursed Blood by Magnus9284 reviews

Izuku was born with a quirk, just not the kind of quirk he wanted, or the kind that was liked by those around him; now he has to find his place among the heroes, with a curse that seems fit for the darkest villain. Rathed M for graphic descriptions, dark humor, and possible romantic stuff.

My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 20 - Words: 183,085 - Reviews: 819 - Favs: 1,786 - Follows: 2,156 - Updated: 8/10 - Published: 11/5/2018 - [Izuku M., Tsuyu A.]

RWBY: Continuing Science by Roboman reviews

After finally escaping Aperture for the last time, Chell wonders what to do for her life. Well, she has a new and improved portal gun, and Huntress sounds like a decent job. (Canceled)

Crossover - Portal & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 18 - Words: 38,789 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 118 - Follows: 163 - Updated: 8/8 - Published: 5/23/2017 - Chell, Team RWBY - Complete

Anyone Can Become A Hero by Count chaos reviews

Ever since his accident, everyone said that he'll never walk again, let alone ride a horse. That he'll never reclaim his former glory and that he'll be nothing more than a Quirkless boy in a world filled with super powerful people. Yet Johnny Joestar never thought that it would take becoming a hero in order to walk again.

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 19 - Words: 281,420 - Reviews: 327 - Favs: 453 - Follows: 523 - Updated: 7/29 - Published: 3/13/2017

Dead Man's Apology by CurdonThatBastard reviews

After a gruesome death and a more sinister punishment, the soul of a killer passes through space and time to find its way reborn in a strange new world. With no memory of his past life, he decides to start again as a new man and find meaning in the dangerous path awaiting him, even though he is convicted that he will never find the peace he so desperately seeks.

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 40,714 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 149 - Follows: 174 - Updated: 7/27 - Published: 6/24/2017 - Yoshikage K.

No More Heroes: Purple Violence (The Rewrite) by Golden Wind Requiem reviews

Witness blood filled mayhem as Mineta Minoru, with Travis Touchdown at his side, tackles the UAA to become number one! *cough* Junior UAA *cough*

Crossover - No More Heroes & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,847 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 7/25 - Published: 7/8 - Travis T., Minoru M.

Wonderland comes to Brockton Bay by Smaugtheterrible reviews

Annette Hebert used to read Alice in Wonderland to her daughter every night, and now instead of triggering with control over insects, she triggers with a fractured mind that brings wonder and insanity to Brockton Bay.

Worm - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 12 - Words: 12,258 - Reviews: 117 - Favs: 689 - Follows: 916 - Updated: 7/22 - Published: 12/28/2017

Butterfly by Yojimbra reviews

Visiting the Smash Universe Joker meets a cute and rather angry princess that's really good with her sword. She was supposed to be from another dimension, so how exactly did she end up taking the return trip back with him? Joker x Lucina. Mostly set in Persona 5 world, will branch out from there. Not dead... just sleeping.

Super Smash Brothers - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 22,624 - Reviews: 66 - Favs: 264 - Follows: 340 - Updated: 7/10 - Published: 1/25 - [Joker/Ren A., Lucina] Palutena, Bayonetta

Spider-Network by RebukeX7 reviews

Social media has had many uses. Finding old friends, keeping up with the news, finding love, and even...saving the world? It started with a "stupid" idea Peter had during a date night with MJ but little did he know it would change the multiverse forever. A series of loosely connected one-shots that tell how an app saved existence. Canon relationships, rating may vary.

Spider-Man - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 8 - Words: 57,474 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 397 - Follows: 385 - Updated: 7/3 - Published: 1/3 - [Peter P./Spider-Man, Mary Jane W.] [Miles M./Ultimate Spider-Man, Gwen S.]

Raging Ice by XPsypher reviews

It was all over, he had failed to avenge his team. Now he was apart of the body count, and his capo was left all alone to defend himself. Fate was a funny thing, coming in to save Ghiaccio when he'd least expect it. Now, where in the world was he! ( Now Cross-posted on AO3!)

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Family - Chapters: 15 - Words: 30,737 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 177 - Follows: 232 - Updated: 6/18 - Published: 3/6 - Ghiaccio, Katsuki B.

STARDERP TENDENCY by Jonathan Wolf reviews

In which Aqua end up banished as a Pillar (Wo)Man, Kazuma end up reincarnated as the third JoJo, Darkness being a Hamon user, and Megumin is now the little sister of Yoshikage Kira. A Crossover AU about Konosuba Gang's shenanigans in the JoJoverse! Hamon, Stands, And useless Pillar Woman abound!

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 36 - Words: 125,925 - Reviews: 110 - Favs: 132 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 6/12 - Published: 7/26/2018 - [Megumin, Kazuma S.] Joseph J., Yoshikage K.

That's Where You'll Find Me by ADyingGalaxy reviews

AU. Madison's mother had often said that these monsters were far smarter than humans dared give them credit for.

Godzilla - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,432 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 6/10 - Published: 6/4 - [Mothra, Godzilla] - Complete

Daily Life of a Bicycle Cop by K-Ghidorah reviews

What is a mild-mannered bicycle cop to do when he finds himself living with some of the most dangerous mythological creatures in the world? Can he tame them, or will they tear him apart? This is based off/inspired by the fan-creation known as Everyday Life with Bicycle Cop. I've felt that it deserves a full story rather than single page mangas and fanart. Hope you all dig it.

Daily Life with a Monster Girl/モンスター娘のいる日常 - Rated: T - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 9 - Words: 79,445 - Reviews: 97 - Favs: 265 - Follows: 293 - Updated: 6/7 - Published: 10/15/2016 - Ms. Smith, OC

Encyclopedia Daemonica by lyuboiv reviews

An in-depth exploration of many aspects of the DooM universe's story, levels, artifacts, demons and more. This repository of dark knowledge is eagerly looking for fresh mortal souls to share its secrets... are you brave enough to open it? (now with Doom 64-related content!)

Doom - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Chapters: 16 - Words: 42,804 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 6/5 - Published: 8/22/2013 - Baphomet, Doomguy - Complete

Quiet Life With Monster Girls by 1ForThePriceOf2 reviews

After escaping a terrible fate in the ghost alley, Yoshikage Kira finds himself in a world where the lines between myth and reality are blurred. As the neighbour of Kimihito Kurusu, Kira must now cope with the multitude of issues presented by the Cultural Exchange Program while trying to keep his second chance at a quiet life intact. Image by Tiamatio.

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & Daily Life with a Monster Girl/モンスター娘のいる日常 - Rated: M - English - Mystery/Drama - Chapters: 13 - Words: 80,221 - Reviews: 135 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 369 - Updated: 5/25 - Published: 6/1/2018 - Yoshikage K., Kimihito, Miia, Ms. Smith

Great Teacher OniGuzma by SuperfastSquiddle reviews

After disbanding Team Skull Guzma, the team's former boss, decides to return to his home on Melemele Island. There, after a once in a lifetime opportunity arises, he is accepted into a teaching position at his old Pokemon school. Though with his infamous reputation, winning over his students will be a tough task. It is one that he is more than determined to take on.

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 26 - Words: 126,716 - Reviews: 241 - Favs: 267 - Follows: 278 - Updated: 5/21 - Published: 12/3/2016 - OC, Guzma

Made to Kill you, Chose to Love you by Yojimbra reviews

She was created to become the Ultimate Assassin, to sow terror and chaos into society by leaving their leaders and heroes nothing more than a pool of blood. Fortunately, she has a weakness for Izuku Midoriya. Izuku x Fem Nomu. Yes you read that right. No, I'm not sorry.

My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: M - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,451 - Reviews: 264 - Favs: 586 - Follows: 747 - Updated: 5/8 - Published: 4/5 - [Izuku M., Noumu]

Hearts Aflutter by Szept reviews

Taylor will be hers. She doesn't have a choice.

Crossover - Worm & Yandere Simulator - Rated: T - English - Horror/Romance - Chapters: 27 - Words: 63,253 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 560 - Follows: 657 - Updated: 5/4 - Published: 3/15/2016 - [Skitter, Ayano A./Yandere-chan]

Sing and Spin by electron1877 reviews

Two people from another world, both willing to fight for their lives. How should they feel when they are up against evils from their true homes? See what happens when they try to spin the wheels of fate. [Fates x Steel Ball Run]

Crossover - Fire Emblem & JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,307 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 4/10 - Published: 4/4/2018 - Azura, Johnny J.

Baptism of Blood by Kriegon reviews

The voice knew madness. His other half, a bringer of death,destruction, and occasional vulgarity. This psychotic vault hunter will journey through a waking nightmare and will come upon an eldritch truth. All they can hope for is not to drown in the blood of Yharnam.

Crossover - Borderlands & Bloodborne - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Tragedy - Chapters: 12 - Words: 39,930 - Reviews: 41 - Favs: 115 - Follows: 140 - Updated: 4/7 - Published: 7/8/2016 - Krieg

The Knock-On Effect by Morning Robber reviews

A collection of depressing short stories dealing with the lives of the cast after the events of their respective story arcs. Jumps between endings with every chapter and will include a story for practically every character in the game, including the non-playable side characters.

Skullgirls - Rated: T - English - Tragedy/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,772 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 5 - Updated: 4/6 - Published: 6/17/2018

The Stars of Remnant by TwinGamers011701 reviews

The world had reset, this much was true. No one could escape the change of the world. No one was even aware. However, when familiar events start to repeat, when the ties that ran thicker than blood begin to respond, who is called? The Stars that saved another world countless times will rise once again, to save the one they live in now. 10 chapter long one-shot!

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & RWBY - Rated: M - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 9 - Words: 121,932 - Reviews: 48 - Favs: 146 - Follows: 152 - Updated: 4/6 - Published: 5/3/2018

The Champion's Challenge by TheChickenMc reviews

Ever wonder what would happen if the heroes of S-Class were to go against the Caped Baldly? Cause I have... Watch as the S-Class of the Hero Organization go against the man of the hour, and truly see what Saitama really is.

One Punch Man/ワンパンマン - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 118,137 - Reviews: 407 - Favs: 1,031 - Follows: 1,111 - Updated: 4/1 - Published: 4/19/2017 - Saitama

Regeneration: See what I have become by blackcomet1224 reviews

RE1!AU: After a period of degeneration, Lisa went through a period of regeneration. Now she lives in the forest her thoughts becoming clearer. With her, mental regeneration came a mental focus and a will to save her parents and for vengeance.

Resident Evil - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Horror - Chapters: 2 - Words: 10,126 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 20 - Updated: 3/26 - Published: 2/9 - Chris R., Jill V., Lisa T.

Resident Evil: The Hat That Knows Where It's At by Hawki reviews

Oneshot: Say what you will about Mr. X, he at least had excellent taste in headwear.

Resident Evil - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,432 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 2 - Published: 3/16 - Claire R., Mr. X - Complete

Izuku's Time Traveling Girlfriend by Yojimbra reviews

she came out of nowhere, smiling at him like they were long lost friends that knew each other's deepest darkest secrets. Yet he doesn't recognize her at all.

My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 11 - Words: 22,921 - Reviews: 260 - Favs: 770 - Follows: 938 - Updated: 3/14 - Published: 11/12/2018 - [Izuku M., Eri]

The Furthest Thing From A Hero (DISCONTINUED) by 1ForThePriceOf2 reviews

WILL BE REWRITTEN. Dio Brando was dead. Now he's not. However, saying that he's alive again might not exactly be correct, either. Izuku Midoriya was all alone. Now he's not. However, saying that he's gained a friend might not exactly be correct, either.

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 12,555 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 126 - Follows: 155 - Updated: 3/7 - Published: 11/17/2018 - Complete

Remnant's Bizarre Adventure: Beacon is Unbreakable by The Inkasters reviews

"To live with his friends and family, safe in their homes as his grandfather had dreamed? That was what Higashikata Josuke fought for." Written by: gorilla fingers

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 63 - Words: 722,683 - Reviews: 778 - Favs: 698 - Follows: 742 - Updated: 2/27 - Published: 1/14/2017 - Josuke H., Team RWBY, Team JNPR

From the Ashes by erttheking reviews

Even after seeing their world burned, Humanity was able to stand up again, and push beyond their pre-war status and reach the heavens. But how will a hardened Humanity handle life among the stars? And how will others react to this aggressive newcomer?

Crossover - Fallout & Mass Effect - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Romance - Chapters: 118 - Words: 913,475 - Reviews: 3479 - Favs: 2,661 - Follows: 2,506 - Updated: 2/24 - Published: 5/17/2012

Prototype by NeoScriptGenius12 reviews

The Punisher travels Eastwards to hunt down a new enemy/A one-shot for what may or may not become a future story.

Punisher - Rated: T - English - Crime/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,508 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/24 - Complete

Snake On A Plain by fyxyuc reviews

Following the events of Smash Ultimate, former FOXHOUND agent Solid Snake is given an offer to live in the town of Animal Crossing by the mayor and his secretary Isabelle. Snake accepts, and one year later is living a peaceful life. The story follows him and his daily interactions with the town.

Crossover - Metal Gear & Animal Crossing - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,100 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 15 - Published: 1/13

I'm Mary Poppins, Ya'll by Z.R. Stein reviews

The Banks Family is in dire straights once again. [One-Shot]

Crossover - Mary Poppins & Guardians of the Galaxy - Rated: T - English - Family/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,481 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 7 - Published: 1/8 - Yondu U.

Drop Dead Dullahan! by Cjethan21 reviews

Izuku Midoriya is born with a rather peculiar quirk. After years of not finding out what his quirk was and the school bullies ragging on him, he finally decides that it was time to end it all. After attempting suicide he realizes that he cannot die, and due to some circumstances he needs to hide the true nature of his quirk. Immortality isn't as good as it appears to be...

Crossover - My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア & Skullgirls - Rated: M - English - Supernatural/Drama - Chapters: 7 - Words: 31,622 - Reviews: 120 - Favs: 754 - Follows: 988 - Updated: 1/6 - Published: 10/20/2017 - [R. Yanagi, Izuku M.] 1-A Students, 1-B Students

I'm Mary Poppins, y'all! by Land of Spare Oom reviews

What would've happened if Yondu Udonta had taken Mary Poppins' place nannying the Banks children? Uncannon, duh.

Crossover - Mary Poppins & Guardians of the Galaxy - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 802 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/3

The Burger Joint at the End of the Multiverse by Hawki reviews

Into the Spider-Verse Oneshot: After travelling across dimensions, first order of business is to get a burger. And fries. Don't forget the fries.

Spider-Man - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,370 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 37 - Follows: 18 - Published: 12/22/2018 - Gwen S., Miles M./Ultimate Spider-Man - Complete

MLP Loops by Saphroneth reviews

Twilight Sparkle has been here before. In fact, she's been here so often she's thoroughly bored. Time Loop stories for Equestria.

My Little Pony - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 214 - Words: 2,214,405 - Reviews: 1664 - Favs: 1,315 - Follows: 1,063 - Updated: 12/3/2018 - Published: 4/19/2013 - Twilight Sparkle

Schizoid by MightyMiget reviews

Three men, all of them monsters in their own way, find themselves on a new stage to wage war...

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 54,336 - Reviews: 118 - Favs: 174 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 12/2/2018 - Published: 1/2/2017

Of Gods and Hunters by chronoman reviews

The world of Remnant needs to be judged whether it can exist, or if it needs to end. To do this Arceus, the creator of all worlds, has sent a small group from the pantheons. His sons, gods, and servants now must walk the planet and determine if this world is worthy to survive or face his judgement. Rated T for violence.

Crossover - Pokémon & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 100,946 - Reviews: 100 - Favs: 268 - Follows: 283 - Updated: 11/26/2018 - Published: 6/25/2017 - Dialga, Giratina, Palkia, Regigigas

Mercs in Remnant by chief of RAGE reviews

[ALMOST BACK] After the lovable mercs of TF2 defeat the Classic mercs, they're fired for no longer being relevant to Mann Co. business since all three Mann brothers are dead and Hale has control of the company again. So there go our boys, traveling the dusty desert, until something happens that leaves them in a completely new world.

Crossover - Team Fortress 2 & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 75 - Words: 463,521 - Reviews: 1460 - Favs: 625 - Follows: 631 - Updated: 11/9/2018 - Published: 8/7/2016

Rifts Between Worlds by chief of RAGE reviews

[Original Chapters Reinserted, Story Renamed] A different take on the original MIR. A somewhat more serious approach as opposed to the original. When the mercenaries are warped to the world of Remnant, they're left wondering where they are and how they can get back. While they scrape by, dark disturbances rumble in the void between worlds...

Crossover - Team Fortress 2 & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 83,957 - Reviews: 389 - Favs: 301 - Follows: 360 - Updated: 11/9/2018 - Published: 8/25/2017

Mercs in Remnant: Extras by chief of RAGE reviews

Contains all other extra content related to "Mercs In Remnant" including backgrounds, side stories, cut content, and old chapters.

Crossover - Team Fortress 2 & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 24 - Words: 129,268 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 44 - Updated: 11/9/2018 - Published: 12/27/2016

Stand Together by Lets Do That Again reviews

Jotaro didn't want this life for his family, especially his daughter. But, fate seems to like making the Joestar line suffer.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 12,904 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 124 - Follows: 135 - Updated: 10/31/2018 - Published: 9/2/2018 - Jotaro K., Jolyne C.

Janus-Syndrome by Memaiko reviews

A two-faced monster hides its ugly self behind a human mask. But what if that very mask crumbles away and reveals what's lurking inside the shell of a dead man?

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: M - English - Romance/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,622 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 2 - Published: 10/18/2018 - Yoshikage K., Shinobu K. - Complete

Josephu Joestar's Bizzare Sex Adventure by Velkyrix21 reviews

This is pretty much a story about the Joestar Sex Drive.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 594 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 9/26/2018 - Published: 4/18/2017 - Joseph J., Caesar Z., Lisa Lisa, Suzi Q.

Okay by RedMonocle reviews

Years after Cairo, sometimes Jotaro still doesn't know how to explain what happened. His wife tries to understand. JotaWife. One-shot. COMPLETE.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,200 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 4 - Published: 9/21/2018 - [Jotaro K., OC] Jolyne C. - Complete

Cinderella Deluxe by AizentheDevil reviews

Yukako starts living her childhood dream of becoming a hairdresser. Set between the start of Part 5 and the start of Part 6.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 6,336 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 8 - Updated: 9/5/2018 - Published: 4/29/2018 - Josuke H., Jolyne C., Koichi H., Yukako Y.

Meet The Offspring Snippet: Meet The Target by FarSideOfTheSun reviews

Nine certain mercenaries have returned to the Badlands after a fifteen-year absence during which they've started families. Not long after their return, a stray dog finds his way to their base and befriends their children. Rated K plus because it's pretty tame for TF2.

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 7 - Words: 13,545 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 9/3/2018 - Published: 2/28/2017

Happy New Year, Emperor by 1ForThePriceOf2 reviews

At the turn of the year 2002, Diavolo has stamped out all rebellion in Passione and reclaimed his anonymity. However, an unexpected sense of dissatisfaction deep within him begins to surface. Seeking closure, he impulsively takes a trip to Sardinia to visit the shared grave of the three most important women in his life.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Crime/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,546 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/30/2018

Of Magic and Mechanics by Doctor Wheel reviews

An accident with the Teleporters sends our favorite Texan into the past filled with knights, kings, and castles. While that may sound bad enough, it is a past filled with monsters that are not supposed to exist! To get back to the present, he must enlist the help of an elusive equine: a unicorn.

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,485 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 8/22/2018 - Published: 8/10/2018 - Engineer

Legendary Mishaps by Imagination is king reviews

Everyone looks up to Arceus and the other legends, and yet, they still get in hilariously bad situations. This ranges from mutated cake monsters to Demonic Pichu Scouts, Arceus going crazy from stress occasionally, and much, much, much more. To find out what all that meant, read the story! (Finally back from the Dead folks!)

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 31 - Words: 31,471 - Reviews: 175 - Favs: 57 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 8/22/2018 - Published: 6/21/2015 - Arceus, Darkrai, Diancie, Hoopa

The Dog Dilemma by Yeoyou reviews

Snake is on his way to adopt a dog when his stupid hero tendencies make him rescue a cat in peril. Snake has now acquired A Cat. Things go downhill from there.

Metal Gear - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,609 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Published: 8/1/2018 - Complete

Beauty of Rebuilding by Doctor Wheel reviews

(Sequel to The Rift) Due to an unfortunate accident which left BLU dead, RED is now jobless. Now scattered and living as simple civilians, it seems like a fairy-tail ending for the mercs. However, things never go as planned for the mercs, as their lives are interrupted once again by the remnants of an once powerful alliance. Rated T for language and violence.

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 20 - Words: 49,773 - Reviews: 47 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 7/17/2018 - Published: 2/18/2017 - [Pyro, Engineer] [Scout, OC]

His Favorite Song by asdfguy432 reviews

"It was his favorite song... And now it belongs to me."

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,000 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 17 - Published: 7/9/2018 - Katsuki B. - Complete

Spaghetti is Unbreakable by SmoogCriminal reviews

Josuke, shocked by the effects of Tonio's food on Okuyasu, decided to take matters into his own hands and investigate the next dish: spaghetti.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 835 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Published: 6/20/2018 - Josuke H., Okuyasu N., Tonio T. - Complete

Flow to the Sea by dearfriendicanfly reviews

They say that in that brief moment between death and the realization that you are going to die, time slows almost to a halt. Your whole life may flash before your eyes, a split second stretched out to fit an entire lifetime. For Jotaro, it isn't enough.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 692 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/13/2018 - Jotaro K., Jolyne C. - Complete

Pulled from the Stairway by SammaKlaus reviews

After the defeat of the Pillar Men, Joseph Joestar is ready to move on with his life as a married man. However, a series of unexpected revelations says his work isn't quite finished, and one may even change the entire course of his future. JoJo and company embark on yet another adventure full of pre-war and supernatural intrigue with World War II just around the corner.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 9 - Words: 21,609 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 6/5/2018 - Published: 1/12/2017 - Joseph J., Robert S., Caesar Z., Lisa Lisa

i have a doctorate by Full Metal Douchebag reviews

"Bullshit."

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 651 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 16 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/3/2018 - Jotaro K., Koichi H., Rohan K. - Complete

Father Figure by AizentheDevil reviews

The first in a series of fanfics centered around what became of the Morioh Gang between the end of DiU and the start of Stone Ocean. Okuyasu becomes an apprentice chef working under Tonio.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,488 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 5/13/2018 - Published: 2/17/2018 - Josuke H., Koichi H., Okuyasu N., Tonio T.

Back-to-School by SpearmintMirage reviews

The Skullgirl was gone, but with the return of some semi-familiar faces, the students of Maplecrest High School had more than enough to talk about.

Skullgirls - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,264 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 8 - Published: 4/29/2018 - Filia, Painwheel/Carol - Complete

A Skull in Time by Nooklays reviews

How does one get home without getting blocked on the way? That was what Hat Kid thought when she got caught again in an accident that left her stranded on another planet filled with dangerous people who are after another thing besides the timepieces that she lost: a cursed artefact known as the Skull Heart. Will she find all the timepieces? Or resort to wishing on the Skull Heart?

Crossover - A Hat in Time & Skullgirls - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 9,160 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 4/22/2018 - Published: 3/11/2018 - [Hat Kid, Umbrella]

The Bible of Bob Ross by The Second Prophet of Bob Ross reviews

The true story of Bob Ross. May Bob Ross bless you...

Misc. Tv Shows - Rated: K+ - English - Mystery - Chapters: 1 - Words: 439 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 1 - Published: 4/16/2018 - Complete

Just How Can a Computer Do Magic? ! by Quatermass reviews

("Is Your Great-Aunt an AI!" sequel) GLaDOS has learned how to do magic, and is going to be teaching at Hogwarts. And it's just as well, for a plot is afoot to cause trouble at Hogwarts. Can a genius, if insane, computer and her great-nephew Harry stop things from spiralling out of control? Or will the beast of the Chamber of Secrets thwart even GLaDOS and Harry?

Crossover - Harry Potter & Portal - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 7 - Words: 18,234 - Reviews: 164 - Favs: 1,132 - Follows: 1,498 - Updated: 4/14/2018 - Published: 3/13/2017 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Chell, GLaDOS

Give Jotaro one good reason he shouldn't punch your face in by The Outrageous Moose reviews

Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Ora Clickhole parody. ORA.

Crossover - X-overs & JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 458 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 5 - Follows: 6 - Published: 4/13/2018 - Jotaro K.

The Loud House SHORTS! 0004 When Eurobeat kicks in by Bumblebee993

The Loud family knew that Lori's the only member in the family who have a driver's license little they didn't know that Lori's actually a drifter

Crossover - Initial D & Loud House - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,049 - Favs: 2 - Published: 4/3/2018 - Lincoln L., Lori L., Luan L., Lynn L. - Complete

The Blue Samurai by Yami584 reviews

During a mission Caboose comes across a sword. When he takes it the Reds and Blues discover another side to the lovable blue idiot they didn't know about.

Red vs. Blue - Rated: M - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 4 - Words: 3,146 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 63 - Updated: 3/31/2018 - Published: 11/6/2016 - M. Caboose

More Than One Hero by Merry Sioux reviews

Bakugou Katsuki is an odd child. His parents will say he collects a lot of odd things, likes to make too many explosions (quirk or not), and can be so quiet that people won't know he's there. His childhood friend will say he's a little weird, switches from polite speech to swears-a-lot at the drop of a hat, and has the habit of giving things to strangers because they asked him.

Crossover - Legend of Zelda & My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 10 - Words: 41,083 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 928 - Follows: 958 - Updated: 3/25/2018 - Published: 12/23/2017

Gordon Ramsay goes to City 17 by ApacheTheWriter reviews

How would the events of Half Life 2 play out if a different Gordon stepped off the train?

Half-Life - Rated: M - English - Parody/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,447 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 3/8/2018 - Published: 2/28/2018

The Bringer of Balance (old version) by Le MAO XXV reviews

Cinder has made her move. Grimm invade, the Dragon has awakened, and the Fall Maiden's power is finally hers. All goes according to plan...not really. Because unfortunately, her plan has upset the balance, and the King of the Grimm has arisen to restore it. Godzilla enters the fray. (Grimm! Godzilla) (New cover art by Deviantartist ghost922114) (TO BE REWRITTEN)

Crossover - Godzilla & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,415 - Reviews: 83 - Favs: 343 - Follows: 183 - Updated: 3/5/2018 - Published: 2/17/2016 - Godzilla, Ruby R., Pyrrha N., Cinder F. - Complete

Your Soul Is With The Rain Now by merryfortune reviews

[Mountain Tim/Sugar Mountain] [surreal canon divergent au] Mountain Tim awakes in a small pool of water. He has no memory of how he got there. He has no memory of the clothes he wears or of the words that seep into his mouth with no attached meaning.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,422 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/17/2018 - Mountain Tim - Complete

Meet the Bloopers by Doctor Wheel reviews

Do you really expect the mercs got everything right on the first try? Here's a little look at what didn't make the cut in various Team Fortress Videos. Now in fabulous Technicolor!

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,169 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 32 - Updated: 2/11/2018 - Published: 8/19/2017

Last Days by yan6 reviews

The Joestar Family has a greater connection than typical families and those differences come to light a lot more when the world is ending

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 4,669 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 2/5/2018 - Published: 1/24/2018 - Joseph J., Josuke H., Giorno G., Holy K.

Halo? No I have horns by Final SD reviews

Hell no longer could Deal with the Doomslayer. He was too much. They also feared killing him as to be trapped with his soul. So they sent him away. A drift in the stars for hundreds of years till eventually he was discovered by Infinity.

Crossover - Doom & Halo - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 25 - Words: 44,896 - Reviews: 251 - Favs: 437 - Follows: 507 - Updated: 2/5/2018 - Published: 9/16/2016

Paranoia by Countless Stories reviews

Living life as a stand user, you either die young, or live long enough to become paranoid.

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 781 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 1/13/2018

Skies Above Us by Miki-chan13 reviews

Asalie (REPRESSED NERD) wants nothing to do with the outside world, Lillie (MYSTERY GIRL) is not what she seems, Hau (ULTIMATE WINGMAN) has high hopes for his up-coming journey and Gladion (VOICE OF REASON) wonders what madness he's stumbled into. These four only wish their lives would stay this simple and peaceful...

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 48 - Words: 221,565 - Reviews: 222 - Favs: 112 - Follows: 129 - Updated: 12/31/2017 - Published: 11/26/2016 - Lily/Leelee, Moon, Gladion/Gladio, Hau - Complete

Meet the Dad? by Awesome Arod reviews

In an alternate universe where two of the members of Team RWBY have a abusive, alcoholic dad, they meet every one's favorite Russian tank. Join them as they try to adjust to life with a future killer mercenary. Heavy, better be ready to raise two huntresses...

Crossover - Team Fortress 2 & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Family - Chapters: 6 - Words: 27,591 - Reviews: 64 - Favs: 116 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 12/29/2017 - Published: 5/16/2017 - Heavy, Ruby R., Yang X.L.

Disturbance at Sea by chief of RAGE reviews

A doctor is called in to keep the girls in top health after an unfortunate reveal that they can get sick. As the doctor stays in the base, some questions arise about him and his origin as he is... strange, to say the least. They never would've suspected that he and some other men are not of this world. Time for an adventure involving mercs and Kanmusu...

Crossover - Team Fortress 2 & Kantai Collection - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 20,740 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 97 - Updated: 12/14/2017 - Published: 11/2/2017

Enemy Number One by nanayoung reviews

A series of snippits based on the idea that Saitama was considered the number one most powerful villain and a God level threat for years by the entire world... and never knew.

One Punch Man/ワンパンマン - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 15 - Words: 17,754 - Reviews: 531 - Favs: 2,469 - Follows: 2,633 - Updated: 11/26/2017 - Published: 3/18/2017 - Saitama

DW's Update Place by Doctor Wheel reviews

Looks to this for updates on my stories and what is going on for me. I highly recommend that you follow this to get updates on what is happening.

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 16 - Words: 3,670 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 9 - Updated: 11/21/2017 - Published: 8/25/2016 - Complete

Killing The Past by The Compendium of Steve reviews

So there's apparently a weapon that can change one's past. Certainly an enticing prospect for a group of troubled friends in a dying town. But which of them would be crazy enough to see if such a thing actually exists? And what exactly would they change if given the chance?

Crossover - Enter the Gungeon & Night in the Woods - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 7 - Words: 22,330 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 11/19/2017 - Published: 4/28/2017 - Mae B., Bea S., Gregg, Angus - Complete

The Legend of Eevee: Majerkass's Mask by that one little guy reviews

When an evil Nuzleaf has caused the moon to fall and destroy the world in three days, you probably wonder how things can get any worse. Here's how: The only one who can stop it is a certain peabrained, time traveling Pichu. Say your prayers, Termina.

Crossover - Pokémon & Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 40 - Words: 115,351 - Reviews: 439 - Favs: 236 - Follows: 186 - Updated: 10/14/2017 - Published: 6/6/2011 - Clefairy/Pippi, Pichu - Complete

One Shot: Big Band Arc by Thiriston reviews

Jaune's service as a policeman was short and abrupt, after being beaten to a pulp and left to die by aggressive White Fang extremists. Built anew by Ozpin's council he works alongside them against the growing threat of the Queen and her allies. Now he just needs to figure out his latest mission, something about a girl and silver eyes... Rated M to be safe

Crossover - Skullgirls & RWBY - Rated: M - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,515 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 18 - Published: 9/26/2017 - Filia, Big Band, Ruby R., Jaune A.

All The Important Things by Ysavvryl reviews

There's many quirks to traveling in the earthly realm, but Ammy's going to teach Chibi the important things.

Okami - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,703 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Published: 9/25/2017 - Amaterasu, Chibiterasu - Complete

Roar by Shivasb reviews

The monster was something we never encountered before. What is it? Where did it came from? What can we find out about it? Can we ever hope to kill it? I hope so, we need to. That's why we need to learn everything we can about it. That's why this compilation was put together. So that it might save us. All of us. One-shot fic.

Crossover - Godzilla & RWBY - Rated: M - English - Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,490 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/17/2017 - Complete

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Z-Crystals are Unbreakable by DiRunner reviews

Join a certain pompadoured teen as he journeys across the Alola region with new Pokemon. What tough challenges await this new trainer? Strong trainers, a criminal organization, aliens? That much and more on this truly Bizarre Adventure. It's going to be great!

Crossover - Pokémon & JoJo's Bizarre Adventure - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 13,726 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/9/2017 - Published: 5/14/2017 - Lillie, Josuke H., Koichi H.

The Search for Purple! by ParadigmRiki reviews

"Hey, remember when we saved Zelda?" That line brought the three Tri Force Heroes memories from the past. The conversation led to Purple and the three friends were determined to find their old friend. Tests and trials await our heroes but what of Purple? Get ready for adventure, friendship, stupid conflict, a very poorly written villian and an overuse of the greeting "Yo!"

Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,121 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 9/9/2017 - Published: 1/7/2017 - Blue, Red, Green

A Rabbit's Greed by silentshadow01 reviews

Greed in his last moments watched as his friend's watch him fade to nothing as he felt content with that. That is, until he get's a chance to live again in another world. Sounds great, but only one problem. He's been recreated as a Grimm that the world is bent on killing while befriending a mistreated rabbit who's job should be to kill him. Read and see what happens. T to be safe

Crossover - Fullmetal Alchemist & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 24,640 - Reviews: 268 - Favs: 944 - Follows: 1,095 - Updated: 9/6/2017 - Published: 3/2/2015 - Greed, Velvet S.

Soldier's American Adventure! (UP FOR ADOPTION!) by Doctor Wheel reviews

After an accident with a prototype teleporter, Soldier is sent to an alternate dimension where the Nazis had won WWII. Unwilling to let this happen, he sets out to crush the regime. Not alone, however, since a handful of people show up to help him with his crusade to crush the Nazis. Who may that be? Lady Liberty, Uncle Sam, and many more.

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 2 - Words: 1,010 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 8/29/2017 - Published: 8/1/2017 - Soldier, OC - Complete

Special Operations Group: Team Fortress by chief of RAGE reviews

During the Second World War, a group of men are secretly called together for only one purpose. To cause as much damage and destruction from behind enemy lines as humanly and physically possible. Follow them on their harrowing and great adventures as they perform their mission with... varying results. Whatever happens, they'll do their best...

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,167 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 21 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 8/19/2017 - Published: 2/16/2017

Remnant's Bizarre Adventure Chibi by The Inkasters reviews

A collection of decidedly non-canon shorts and potential outtakes based upon Remnant's Bizarre Adventure: Beacon is Unbreakable as seen through the lens of the Chibi universe. Where nothing bad will ever happen. EVER!

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 25,369 - Reviews: 52 - Favs: 101 - Follows: 99 - Updated: 8/7/2017 - Published: 3/10/2017

Rise of a New Alpha by Djsoresupon3 reviews

01 was with the new president of the Aether Foundation, Gladion. 02 was in the care of the new champion of the Alola Region. But the files stated there were three... so where was the third? This is the story of a creature desperate to find somewhere it belongs.

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 15 - Words: 23,785 - Reviews: 28 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 30 - Updated: 8/3/2017 - Published: 1/6/2017 - Type: Null, Silvally

A Spark Of Moonlight by Laqueus reviews

Twice during her adventure, Amaterasu feels another presence similar to hers. A smaller one, that also wields a Celestial Brush... [Amaterasu/Waka, Reupload and Rewrite, contains spoilers for both Okami and Okamiden]

Okami - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,455 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 4 - Published: 7/24/2017 - [Amaterasu, Waka] - Complete

We Are Number One by Le MAO XXV reviews

Cinder apparently believes that Emerald, Mercury, and Neo haven't been living up to the standards of villainy. Therefore, she recruits the perfect man to teach them: Robbie Rotten! Watch as this villain of laziness teaches these three noobs how to be a proper villain! (Warning: musical number inbound. You have been warned!) (Parody crossover) (RIP Stefán Karl Stefánsson T T)

Crossover - Lazytown & RWBY - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,928 - Reviews: 26 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 34 - Published: 7/12/2017 - Robbie R., Mercury B., Emerald S., Neo - Complete

Everybody Knows the Chorus by ChangelingRin reviews

In which a muggleborn takes a derogatory insult and connects it with a well-known Queen song. Because 'Mudblood' can sound a lot like 'mud on your face' when taken in the right context.

Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,349 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 27 - Follows: 10 - Published: 6/20/2017

The Scotsman and the Grimm by Lord Maximus reviews

When the Scotsman saw Jack disappeared he believed Aku was finished. He didn't expect to meet this blue guy who tells him of the timeline changing and that instead of Aku taking over the world a force known as the Grimm is born to destroy everything. Well, at least he will be alive again and he can see his daughters born again. I BE BACK AND IN ME PRIME NO LESS!

Crossover - Samurai Jack & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 945 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 31 - Published: 6/1/2017 - Complete

Post-Apocalypse Punk by Havoka reviews

The omnium explosion lay waste to her home and destroyed pretty much everything she ever knew - yet Hana survived. Amidst a sea of criminals she met good people. She discovered that the outback might not be such a hopeless wasteland after all. Unfortunately, a certain megacorporation came to the same conclusion. [Junker AU, no canon ships]

Overwatch - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 20 - Words: 92,214 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 81 - Follows: 78 - Updated: 5/27/2017 - Published: 12/28/2016 - Satya V./Symmetra, J. Fawkes/Junkrat, Hana Song/D. Va, Ana A. - Complete

RvB Loops by GammaTron reviews

Part of the Infinite Time Loops. The Anchor is Michael J. Caboose. ...This will not end well for anyone.

Crossover - X-overs & Red vs. Blue - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 62,771 - Reviews: 33 - Favs: 192 - Follows: 177 - Updated: 5/21/2017 - Published: 12/9/2014

Enmity by Pi-dantic

YV has Bill pay him a visit, and Bill's polite enough. But a polite demon is still a demon. Warnings: a little swearing, Bill loves ignoring people's boundaries and being a creep.

Crossover - Gravity Falls & Nuclear Throne - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 946 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/29/2017 - Bill, Y.V., Yung Cuz - Complete

Biodiversity of Hell by ZOMAN388 reviews

The dimension of Hell is home to terrifying and spectacular creatures, each as bizarre and dangerous as the last. Within these files, one can find detailed analysis of the demons of Hell, how they live, and how they interact with the world around them. Readers desecration is advised.

Doom - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,937 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 33 - Follows: 19 - Updated: 4/10/2017 - Published: 11/10/2016

Another One Bites the Dust by Kingly Crimson reviews

Kira was able to successfully active Bites the Dust, except that... It didn't have the intended effect. Now all of our favorite Stand Users are scattered across New Meridian. A land of Fantasy, Gangsters, Art Deco Architecture, and something about a skullheart. Things just got a little more Bizarre.

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & Skullgirls - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 5 - Words: 19,588 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 102 - Follows: 127 - Updated: 3/27/2017 - Published: 1/14/2017

Godzilla X RWBY: Remnant Kaiju Assault by GojiGrimlockSaurus reviews

Godzilla has been transported to Remnant due to a freak accident in the Dimension Tide Portal. His unannounced arrival causes unprecedented tension and terror among Remnant's denizens. Ruby and her friends have already enough trouble on their plate. Godzilla might prove to be the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back with deadly consequences that will doom everyone.

Crossover - Godzilla & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Horror/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 27,187 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 146 - Follows: 143 - Updated: 3/16/2017 - Published: 3/14/2017 - Godzilla, Team RWBY, Team JNPR

Is Your Great-Aunt an AI? ! by Quatermass reviews

Petunia sends a baby Harry to her aunt, living in America, Caroline Evans. Some years later, Caroline becomes GLaDOS, and only Harry stops her from her rampage. Now, Harry is eleven, and he's heading to Hogwarts. Of course, with an amoral scientist/computer for a great-aunt and a mute big sister, the question is not whether he is ready for Hogwarts. Is Hogwarts ready for him?

Crossover - Harry Potter & Portal - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 19 - Words: 47,708 - Reviews: 390 - Favs: 2,076 - Follows: 1,702 - Updated: 3/13/2017 - Published: 10/18/2015 - [Harry P., Hermione G.] Chell, GLaDOS - Complete

Star Wars Episode Infinity: the Loops by Crossoverpairinglover reviews

A long time ago, beyond the galaxy far far away, time itself broke. Now the multiverse is stuck on repeat and acts up often. This is the story of the mightiest of galactic heroes, trapped in near infinite repeats of time itself, and their adventures both in their own world and the rest of the multiverse. Part of the Infinite Loops fanfiction project

Crossover - Star Wars & X-overs - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 18 - Words: 150,966 - Reviews: 155 - Favs: 482 - Follows: 406 - Updated: 2/17/2017 - Published: 9/29/2014 - Luke S., Anakin Skywalker

Mother of Remnant by silentshadow01 reviews

She is no longer needed, the world is safe so for now she sleeps. Waiting for the day someone comes to wake her if there is ever any trouble brewing in the horizon. But now, when many centuries has past and no one comes for her aid as evil has slowly crept upon the land without her knowing. It seems her quest to bring peace to the world has started once more.

Crossover - Okami & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 14,552 - Reviews: 123 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 324 - Updated: 2/8/2017 - Published: 5/22/2016 - Amaterasu

Fired and Dead Tired by GeminiLady21 reviews

Being stranded at McDonald's would've been funny if Miss Pauling and Scout weren't being hunted down by Gray Mann. Pauling's pissed, fired, and dead tired. If there's any hope of survival, it looks like she has to befriend imposters who are dressed up like the Sniper and Demoman. They call themselves 'cosplayers'...What the heck is a cosplayer?

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,611 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/22/2017 - Scout, Spy, Miss Pauling

Not in Australia Anymore by GeminiLady21 reviews

Update: 'Return of the Reboot.' CURRENT FANFIC IS BEING REWRITTEN/REBOOTED. Please read update chapter for news! Thank you!

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 36,773 - Reviews: 45 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 33 - Updated: 1/22/2017 - Published: 7/31/2016

Huntsman for Fun by Vindicare40k reviews

His twin has super speed and wants to help the world for the better. His older sister has super strength and is a thrill seeker looking for answers. He has more power than anyone could imagine and what does he do this for? For fun of course.

Crossover - RWBY & One Punch Man/ワンパンマン - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,818 - Reviews: 153 - Favs: 578 - Follows: 711 - Updated: 1/11/2017 - Published: 1/8/2016

The Random Raichu by x-Lady Nova-x reviews

Throughout time, a legend has passed down about a hero who holds the fate of the world in their hands... all others can do is hope and pray that it's not Rai the Raichu. Unfortunately for them, she's the star of this story! Follow Rai and her vic- I mean, friends- in the crazy misadventures and all sorts of hooplah that is their lives. Heh... hooplah.

Pokémon - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,227 - Reviews: 11 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 12/31/2016 - Published: 12/3/2015 - Raichu, Squirtle/Zenigame, Zorua, Mimikyu

The Broken Timeline by TwiliMask reviews

The cursed mask has returned, having cheated death with the same tool as the hero of time. However, will the Skull Kid be just another puppet of destruction or the needed hero?

Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,257 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 1 - Published: 11/19/2016 - Link, Skull Kid, Majora's Mask

RWBY: Enter the Okami by Vindicare40k reviews

While undergoing her initiation into Beacon Academy, Ruby Rose stumbles upon a long lost power that could forever reshape the world of Remnant and bring forth a new age of peace. But dark forces conspire against the light, and threaten to extinguish it entirely...

Crossover - Okami & RWBY - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 4 - Words: 11,581 - Reviews: 60 - Favs: 229 - Follows: 266 - Updated: 10/20/2016 - Published: 12/13/2015

Thank You Notes from the Legend of Zelda Cast by miano53 reviews

After stumbling into portals in the various timelines, the cast of the Legend of Zelda series was given a task:to create a series of thank you notes to other characters, their fans, monsters and items they "love"...mostly to entertain their loyal fans after 30 years. Spoiler filled. (On hiatus)

Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 35 - Words: 22,587 - Reviews: 276 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 10/20/2016 - Published: 6/4/2011 - Link, Zelda, Skull Kid, Groose

Pirate Smash by Split Infinitive reviews

Maybe the strangest Legend of Zelda story you'll ever read. Yes, that's an accurate summary. You wanna make something of it...? COMPLETE! No, really.

Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy/Humor - Chapters: 44 - Words: 72,939 - Reviews: 137 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 24 - Updated: 9/23/2016 - Published: 6/8/2016 - Tetra - Complete

The Decision by LittleZbot reviews

One-Shot. One week after The Kid makes his decision, everything is still kinda normal. The Kid explores the surface, looking for survivors, Rucks pilots the Bastion, Zulf stays in his tent all day, and Zia... Zia just breathes.

Bastion - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,428 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 5 - Published: 9/8/2016 - Kid, Zulf, Zia, Rucks - Complete

A Stranger's Story by NineNails reviews

War hero, celebrated architect, genius inventor. If any Ceal were to survive the Calamity, of Couse it would have been Rucks. But how did one of Cealondia's favored sons end as a simple old stranger, waiting on a floating island, for a young man to save him?

Bastion - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,280 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 4/11/2016 - Rucks

What Goes Down in the PC by Reevee21 reviews

What DOES happen when fifteen Pokémon are left in a PC box with a 4th wall breaking system, television, several years of nerd, and themselves? Intense poetry, deep and dark chapters, and death? NO. Smashing, Dorito burritos, funky dreams, LoZ, movie watching, and complete chaos, that's what! Inspired by Lilligant's Lemonade Stand. Cover Art by ChocoChipKitty

Pokémon - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 93 - Words: 78,508 - Reviews: 472 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 3/13/2016 - Published: 3/19/2014 - Quilava/Magmarashi, Flygon, Zoroark, Rotom

Loadout by nerdreject

A series of drabbles that use the weapons, abilities, elixirs, etc., to tell about the kid (and possibly the other characters) from the POV of Rucks. Hope you enjoy!

Bastion - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 280 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Published: 2/7/2016

Taylor's King Crimson by The Imperator President reviews

Alt-Power Taylor with King Crimson and her fight with Lung. This is me testing out how well I can write Taylor's POV, so I'd love any input.

Crossover - JoJo's Bizarre Adventure & Worm - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 11 - Words: 23,248 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 120 - Follows: 124 - Updated: 1/5/2016 - Published: 6/28/2015

The Champion Under the Silver Mountain by The Additional Pylon reviews

Becoming the Champion? Easy. Single-handedly destroying an evil terrorist organization? Even easier. Trying to live a normal life after your grand adventure? Yeah... we might need some help with that one. Unfortunately, the only ones left to help are a bunch of other Champions who have all lost their minds already. What could possibly go wrong?

Pokémon - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 7 - Words: 30,717 - Reviews: 40 - Favs: 44 - Follows: 47 - Updated: 10/14/2015 - Published: 8/4/2015 - Red

Deity by Cody the Kirby reviews

Link has been a spirit watching over Hyrule for a long time. Though his body is young, his mind is old and wise. He has helped subtly guide the heroes of the past. Circumstances now allow him to help directly. In order to hide his identity from his enemies, he must use the dark powers of 'it'. The Fierce Deity will lend him it's power, all he has to do is not drown in the flood.

Legend of Zelda - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 3 - Words: 7,230 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 10/14/2015 - Published: 7/28/2015

Legend of Zelda Time Loops by Lord Circe reviews

What happens when a Hero, a Villain, and a Princess, all start Looping through time? Wacky shenanigans, of course. Time Loops for the Legend of Zelda series, in the style of the Innortal Time Loops and Saphroneth's MLP Loops.

Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 27 - Words: 167,874 - Reviews: 152 - Favs: 519 - Follows: 387 - Updated: 10/3/2015 - Published: 1/20/2014 - Link, Zelda, Ganondorf - Complete

The Night Before the Storm by Dandora reviews

The mutants sit around the campfire. Fish watches them, and muses on the state of the world, and their quest.

Nuclear Throne - Rated: T - English - Sci-Fi/Western - Chapters: 1 - Words: 722 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Published: 8/31/2015

Doctor Who Infinite Loops by Bardic Knowledge reviews

Yggdrasil, the computer that runs the Multiverse, has broken. This has caused chaos and destabilized the very underpinnings of reality. To help keep things stable, the Administrators started activating various realities to start looping through time. One, because of its massive use of time travel was thought unable to activate. They were wrong about that. The Doctor is in.

Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 12 - Words: 75,129 - Reviews: 77 - Favs: 288 - Follows: 292 - Updated: 8/14/2015 - Published: 8/3/2014

Lessons by TheMancer reviews

The Kid keeps mementos from each of the lessons he has learnt in his life. A hammer, a shield, a bandage on his arm, and many more. But how did he acquire them in the first place? Well, that's one story that has to start from the beginning.

Bastion - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 3 - Words: 22,963 - Reviews: 19 - Favs: 34 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 7/10/2015 - Published: 10/3/2012 - Kid, Zulf, Zia, Rucks

Infinite Loops - The Great Big List of Things Loopers Shall Never Do by The Last Trueblade reviews

A community fiction written by several of the authors of the Infinite Loops. What happens when you stick hundreds of loopers in a bar? Have them make a list of things that they agree to never do! Part of the Infinite Loops.

Crossover - X-overs & Misc. Cartoons - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 10,764 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 138 - Follows: 81 - Published: 5/23/2015

Invictus by vetty123 reviews

, or The Abso-bleeding-lutely Unconventional Poem-Fic. Zulf was left to die. The Kid, torn by his decision, chooses the Restoration path and winds the clock back in order to change things. Unfortunately, the gods have other plans. And at the end of it all, the answer to the final question: Who is Rucks, and how does he know The Kid? Two-shot. No pairings.

Bastion - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 2 - Words: 15,614 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 12 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 4/13/2015 - Published: 3/23/2015 - Kid, Rucks, OC - Complete

The Icon of Sin by Janus3003 reviews

The Marine has reached the source of Hell's invasion. Before he can accomplish his mission, however, Hell's final guardian has a few words for him.

Doom - Rated: T - English - Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 838 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 5 - Published: 1/23/2015 - Doomguy - Complete

Something Shiny by pseudocitrus reviews

The Bastion flies on through the ends of a couple different worlds.

Crossover - Bastion & Transistor - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 1 - Words: 473 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 6 - Published: 7/27/2014 - Kid, Zia, Rucks, Red - Complete

Grace of the Wind by EchoNight99 reviews

During a struggle with the legendary eight-headed Arbok, Orochi, the legendary Pokemon, Suicune, was killed. A mysterious man with a shiny Espeon watches its path when it comes back and a tiny man with a Smeargle joins the white and red Pokemon on a quest to defeat the Arbok which had also risen from the dead.

Crossover - Pokémon & Okami - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 765 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 12/27/2013 - Published: 12/1/2013 - [Suicune/Suikun, Amaterasu] [Espeon/Eifie, Waka]

Krieg's Log by Discar reviews

The thoughts and adventures of the (mostly) sane voice inside the head of a psychopathic maniac. One-shot.

Borderlands - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 12,862 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 49 - Published: 8/11/2013 - Complete

The Legend of Eevee: Pokéflute of Time by that one little guy reviews

The crossover you've been dreading: It's Ocarina of Time, but everybody's a Pokémon! Enjoy this less than accurate retelling of the classic game where the Hero of Time is an idiotic Pichu and his partner is the bitchiest Happiness Pokémon you've ever met!

Crossover - Pokémon & Legend of Zelda - Rated: T - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 40 - Words: 74,036 - Reviews: 543 - Favs: 386 - Follows: 172 - Updated: 4/12/2011 - Published: 9/23/2008 - Pichu, Togetic/Togechick - Complete

The Spoils of War reviews

The Soldier. A blood stained, ass kicking, communist killing bloodthirsty man who would do anything for the U.S.A. But, then again, it wasn't always this way. Take a trip down memory lane and see what chewed him up, spat him out, and made him into what he is today.

Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 505 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 1 - Published: 7/30/2017

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