Hello!

Alright,

So, I could tell you about myself;

My likes, my dislikes, my hobbies,

But I know you don't really care.

So. let's get down to the real reason I'm here.

South Park.

I am not obsessed

I am not a fan

Because Matt and Trey think fans are lame.

So for the record

I simply agree with all content of the show

And appreciate its humour.

Consider me a South Park Geek.

(Geek: someone with an extreme understanding in one area of life to the point where it becomes work.)

Moving on;

My Stories

Current:

(11) Shit Happens. [Stuff Happens.] (CraigxKennyxTweek)

(30) We Go Good Together Just Like Coffee And Cream (CraigxTweek)

(4) Crestfallen Woe (CraigxTweek)

On Hold:

(4) Potions Shmotions (tiny!CraigxTweek I'm not working very hard on this one... but you guys seem to like it, so I'll continue.)

(2) Carry the Pieces (several pairings. I don't know when I'll continue to work on this.)

Complete:

(11) Family Studies (CraigxKennyxTweek)

One-shots:

New Traditions (CraigxKenny)

What Do I Do Now? (CraigxKennyxTweek)

How To Save a Life (Craig/Tweek)

Make Your Move (TweekxCraig)

Favourite Characters

1) Craig Tucker, Kenny McCormick, and Tweek Tweak

(A tie for first because I love them all equally)

2) Kyle Broflovski, Stan Marsh

3) Butters

4) Mr./Ms. Garrison, Chef

5) Timmy, Jimmy

6) Wendy

7) Randy Marsh

8) The Mushroom People of Nova Scotia

9) Stans Grandpa

10) Ice Cream Shitting Taco.

Favourite Shippings

-Creneek (CraigxKennyxTweek) My OT3

Threesomes: cause 3 boys is just so much better than 2.

I don't in fact have a OTP but I do love these:

-Creek (CraigxTweek)

-Crenny (CraigxKenny)

-Twenny (TweekxKenny)

And these:

-Style (StanxKyle... duh)

-Dip (DamienxPip)

-Stylenny (StanxKylexKenny, my only Kenny exception.)

And sometimes even these (If they're written well):

-Stendy (StanxWendy)

-Kybe (KylexBebe)

-Candy (Cartman/Wendy)

Least Favourite Shippings

-Usually anyone with Cartman.

-Tweek, Craig and Kenny with anyone but each other. (with one exception.)

-Any pairings that include OC's.

-Most pairings with chicks.

Favourite South Park Quotations

Moses: No cake for the impurity!

-South Park Season 3: Jewbilee

Ms. Garrison: So there you go. you're the retarded offspring of 5 monkeys having butt-sex with a fish squirrel, congratulations. -South Park Season 10: Go God Go

Mr. Garrison: I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die. -South Park Bigger, Longer, and Uncut

Cop 1: Speilberg and Lucas.. They were raping a storm trooper when the Police broke in.

Cop 2: And they found the dead, raped bodies of Yoda and Short Round in their closet. They will never be free to do this again.

-South Park Season 12: The China Problem

Stan: Because the big questions in life are tough: Why are we here? Where are we from? Where are we going? But if people believe in asshole douchie liars like you we’re never going to find the real answers to those questions. You aren’t just lying; you’re slowing down the progress of all mankind YOU DOUCHE. -South Park Season 6: The Biggest Douche In The Universe

Chef: Children, there is a time and place for everything. It's called 'college'.

Towlie: You wanna go get high?

Mr. Garrison: No, that's wrong, Cartman. But don't worry. There are no stupid answers, just stupid people.

Favourite Non-South Park Quotes

Billie-Joe Armstrong: I'd rather regret something I did do then regret not doing it.

Dalai Lama: The purpose of our lives is to be happy.

Albert Einstein: He who can no longer pause to wonder and stand rapt in awe, is as good as dead; his eyes are closed.

Albert Einstein: Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.

Dr. Seuss: If things start happening, don't worry, don't stew, just go right along and you'll start happening too.

Daniel Tosh: One day I wanna be rich enough to afford a dozen doves for every time I enter a room.

Roses are red, violets are blue, fuck you whore.

-[500] Days of Summer

When forty million people believe in a dumb idea, it's still a dumb idea.

Love is a blind whore with a mental disease and no sense of humour.

Baby you're so hot you teach fire how to burn.

If you're looking for sympathy, it's in the dictionary between sh*t and syphilis.

My Friend D-CAF: But whatever I’ll fuck that shit up when I get there.

Why do I like South park?

flips you off
"Did you just flip me off?"
"No."
flips off again.
I'll make you eat your parents.

Enough said.

South park unfourtunatly has taken over my brain.

Well actually it's not really unfourtunate... at all.

Post Script(s)

I am Canadian and all of my words such as colour, favourite, and neighbour will and do contain an extra 'U'. I don't really care if it bothers you.

My name is not actually Mali Kollama. It comes from a Grade 8 geography/history project. The assignment: research an immigrant who has come to Canada and done something great, but not that great so they are famous but not really, and you can't know them.

So.

I made up a girl named Mali Kollama. She was a 4-year-old immigrant from Tajikistan who lived in Red Deer Saskatchewan and became a local star at speed skating.

I received B.

... Red Deer is in Alberta.