![]() Author has written 2 stories for Twilight. Hi! As some of you may or may not have noticed, I recently deleted some of my stories. I found that I started stories that I had no interest in finishing nor did I have the time to finish them. I am very sorry about this and in future I will not start any stories that will not be completed. x Awesomest Twilight Couples (in my opinion) Put your music on shuffle and in the order it comes up in, answer these questions. : ) 1.What would you say about your boyfriend? 2.What is the first thing you say in the morning? 3. Your teacher is ... 4. What's written on your classroom's blackboard? 5. If you ever got a tattoo what would it say? 6. How would you describe your next door neighbors? 7. What would your Best Friend say about you? 8. How do you feel right now? 9. What's on your bedside table right now? 10. What did you do when you woke up this morning? 11. When you open your wardobe you see... 12. What did you say after you last attended a concert? 13. If you had to write a fanfic write now, what would it be called? 14. A song you would sing at your school's talent show? 15. Your life's theme song? 16. How would you describe what you are doing this moment? 17. If you had to go and jump of a building, what would your last words be? 18.Your motto is.. 19. If you could by anything in this world you'd buy... 20. What did you dream about tonight? I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists. I'm BLACK, so I MUST carry a gun. I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be smart. I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape. I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist. I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. I'm an ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world. I DON'T HAVE A RELIGION, so I MUST not have morals. I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people. I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. I'm JAMICAN so I must smoke weed. I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay. I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store. I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister. I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a stuck up whore. I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I WEAR SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut. I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz. I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars. I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border. I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy. I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore. I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut. I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals. I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a big peter. I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat. I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin. I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I'm INTO THEATER ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay. I HAVE BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a whore. I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer. I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool. I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi. I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT. I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited. I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13. I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy. I'm a STONER, so I MUST be going in the wrong direction. I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon and fried chicken. I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST have a small penis. I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay. I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I'm PREP, so I MUST be rich. I dont like the SUN so I MUST be albino. I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo. I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy. I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone. I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. I have a DIFFERENT sence of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an overcontrolling bitch. Im DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be an overcontrolling bitch. I READ COMICS, so I MUST be a loser. I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself. I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I Must be homosexual. I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak. I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted. I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled. I am AMERICAN so I MUST be an obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo. I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent. I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend. I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare. I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid. I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE. I'm ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER! I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth. I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blonde blue-eyed lesbian. I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see." I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE. I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST. I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick. I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE. I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard. I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean." I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid. I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times I’m GAY so I MUST be after EVERY straight guy around. I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian. I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting. I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak. I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life. I DON'T USE SLANG so I MUST be stuck up and posh. I DON'T SPEAK LIKE YOU so I MUST be POSH. My Favourite Twilight Characters: 1. Jasper Whitlock 2. Rosalie Hale 3. Bella Swan 4. Emmett Cullen 5. Esme Cullen 6. Edward Cullen 7. Carlisle Cullen 8. Charlie Swan 9. Jacob Black 10. Angela Weber Have you read a 5/10 fic before? Funnily enough I haven't come across an Esme/Angela fic before... What do you think would happen if 6 got 1 pregnant? If Esme got Jasper pregnant? Well that would be odd... Do you recall any good fics about 9? Nope. I don't read fics about 9. Would 7 and 2 make a good couple? Rosalie and Carlisle? No way! What is a better couple? 4 and 8 or 4 and 9? I don't like the sound of an Emmett and Jacob or an Emmett and Charlie to be quite honest. What would happen if 7 discovered 3 and 8 in a secret relationship? If Carlisle found Charlie and Bella in a secret relationship? I'm not even going to answer that. Make a twenty word summary for a 2 and 6 fic. A Rosalie and Edward fic? No thanks. Is there such thing as a romantic fluff story for 4 and 10? Emmett and Angela? I hope not. Suggest a title for a 1 and 5 hurt/comfort fic. An Esme/Jasper? I'll get back to you on that... What kind of plot would you use for 4 and 1? Emmett and Jasper? No thank you. Does anyone on your friends list read 7 and 9 slash? Carlisle and Jacob? I really hope they don't... If you wrote a songfic about 10 what song would you use? None? I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already made fist and say, "oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you" FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN! WE SCREWED UP!" FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you. BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall. BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?" FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!" FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you. FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month. BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in. FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run, bitch, run!" FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up! FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME." FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell. FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) BEST FRIENDS: Are for life. FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste! FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. FRIENDS: Get angry at you for calling them late in the night BEST FRIENDS: Ask why it took so long for you to call FRIENDS: Wonder about your love life BEST FRINDS: Could blackmail you with it Emmet Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916 Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843 Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901 Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916 Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901 Bella Swan: Clumsier than you since 1989 TWILIGHT QUOTES MIGHT BE SPOILERS "Fine! Do! I can't wait to see what Edward does to you! I hope he snaps your neck, you pushy, obnoxious, moronic, DOG!" ~Bella Swan '' Look after my heart, I left it with you. '' ~ Edward Cullen '' The pillows all appear to have survived. '' ~ Bella Cullen '' I've held her all of onetime, and already you think you have some moronic wolfy claim to her!? She's mine! '' ~ Bella Cullen '' You nicknamed my daughter after the Loch Ness Monster?! '' ~ Bella Cullen I'll try to be nicer if you try to be smarter. When life gives you lemons, chuck them at people you hate. It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and bitch slap someone upside the head. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”? When life hand you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own damn lemonade. When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.” I’d rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I’m not. I’m not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? When life gives you lemons, squirt life in the eye and run like hell My imaginary friend says you have issues. I hear voices and they don't like you. When I snap you'll be the first to go. The real trouble with life is that there is no background music. Stupidity killed the cat. Curiousity was framed. On a Myer hairdryer: On a bag of On a bar of Palmolive soap: On some frozen dinners: On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: On packaging for a K-Mart iron: On Boots Children Cough Medicine: On Nytol Sleep Aid: On most brands of Christmas lights: On a Japanese food processor: On packet of Nobbys' On an American Airlines packet of nuts: I don't blame the company; I blame the parents for On a Swedish chainsaw: On a package of pasta after the cooking insturctions: \/ This \/ Way \/ To \/ My \/ Stories | |||||||
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