"She lost her brain in 'Nam" (boyfriend on myself)
"Who's that chick Romeo likes" (never overestimate private schooling)
"Pottery = Ancient tupperware"
"Wouldn't is be great if the hero got seduced by non-beautiful women?"
"Kids? Me? Drown the little ^&*$. And the baby too."
""My brain is overloading from the stupidity of that question!"
"What would happen if Brum and the Magic School Bus had sex?"
"What cruel person came up with putting an 's' in lisp?"
"Hey, she's on sound crew! Kill her!"
"Papyrus.. isnt that a fruit?"
"They werent allowed to rebel!"
"Now turn around and die - i mean... turn around and do your work."
"I hate elves." "And you wonder why they steal so much." "I just bear a grudge, they started it."
"It's like a party in your nose!" (on smelling lipgloss)
"We thought my little brother had chicken pox last night. i just thought he had fleas. As it turned out, i was right..." my lil bro strikes again.