Hey Guys, here's some words of wisdom!

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 muscles to smile, but only 4 to reach out and slap someone

Don't knock on deaths door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that

Vegetarian: Indian word for 'lousy hunter'.

Normality will be restored as soon as we figure out what it is.

Be yourself. That's crazy enough.

You always get whats coming to you; unless it gets lost in the mail.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver. I guess I can settle for second place.

They say guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG!" i don't think you'd kill many people

Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is.

I have animal magnetism-- when I go outside, squirrels stick to my sleeves.

The trouble with real life is that there is no background music

I have not lost my mind; its backed up on a disk somewhere

Beware the letter 'G'. It is the end of everything.

Forecast for tonight: darkness

If you try to fail and succeed, which one did you do?

I am reading a most interesting book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

How come when you mix water with sugar, you get glue and then when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go?

If everything seems to be going well, you obviously overlooked something

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall through a sewer hole and die.

There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line

I'm not random I just have many thoughts

I'm the kind of person who walks into a chair and apologizes

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

Don't ever argue with an idiot. They'll bring you down to their level and beat you through experience.

To oppose something is to maintain its existence.

If people lead, the leaders will follow.

Some people are born great, some people achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.

If you had a life you would stop talking about mine

We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!

Don't make me angry, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies

Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy? Take him into a round room and tell him to sit in a corner.

People are like slinkies. Basically useless and yet its so amusing to watch them fall down stairs

There is no great genius without a mixture of madness

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

You, you, and you panic. The rest of you follow me.

Lately the only thing keeping me from becoming a serial killer is my dislike for manual labor.

Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them as much

If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with nonsense

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice, lay back, and let the world wonder how you did it.

I'm mature and you're not. Nah nah nah nah nah nah!

Eat healthy. Work right. Die anyway.

I have a dream and in it, something eats you.

Its always funny until someone gets hurt. Then its hysterical

My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems

If aliens are looking for intelligent life, why the hell are you scared?!

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

I know KUNG-FU and 42 other dangerous words

Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhh its a secret!

By the time you finished reading this you'll realize you just wasted 5 seconds of your life

Have you considered suing your brain for non-support?

I'd like to leave you with one thought...but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it!

Wherever there is life there is love

Boy break hearts so why don't we break their necks?

I'm NOT SHORT!! ... I'm fun sized!

Strawberry Laces! Cause not every kid can afford crack!

Patience is what parents have when there are witnesses!

When I die, I'm going to haunt the * out of you people!

If I had half a mind..I would still be smarter than you!!

Flying is simple, you just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drank my water!

All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.

Where there's a will...I want to be in it.

A clean house is a sign of a broken computer

I only know how to do things three ways: the right way, the wrong way, and my way... which is the wrong way only faster.

To catch me you got to be fast, to find me you got to be smart, but to be me? Damn you must be kidding...

Life isn't about the number of breaths we take, but the moments that take our breath away. Like choking.

Due to recent cutbacks and until further notice, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

Ever notice how DYING is at the end of STUDYING?

When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm and punch the crap out of them.

Don't you wish there were a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence? There's one marked "brightness," but it doesn't work.

Come to the dark side. We have cookies.

In order to lose your mind, you have to have one in the first place.

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2.Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, or yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

If so scroll down

(don't cheat- -)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person

2. If you choose

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is is soon to blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul-mate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on in a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides with you and would do anything for you, but may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you will have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose

California: You like adventure.

Florida: You are a laid-back person.

9. If you choose...

Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come before your next birthday