1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

If so, scroll down

(Don't cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you

Love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are

Down.

3. If you're initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to

Blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you

Fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but

The memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life

Changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your

Soul mate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time

My name is jhon and I cant go on.

I am three, what is wrong
with me?

My dad comes home every day drunk

He carries a
gun in his car trunk,

He makes me cry I feel like I might die

I
am an only child and I seem to drive him wild.

My eyes are
swollen and my hands are nom

my dad screams and calls me a bum

Im
to young to do chores so he does it himself

sometimes I cry i
might wanna kill myself.

one day my dad came home late at
night

He looked scary I want to hide I might be having a fright.

He
is very angry, what could it be?

he walks in the house and calls
me bad names

He pins me against the wall, he's aiming his
fist fast in my chest

Im scared and I wish my daddy would rest,

He
puts me down and lets me free.

He pulls out his gun, my name is
jhon and I am three and tonight my daddy murdered me.

If
you
are against child abuse and wish that jhon was spared then please
copy
and paste this into your profile

But will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do

Anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!

Love vs. Sex

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit
some friends one
evening
and time passed quickly as each shared
their
various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than
planned, and
had to walk home alone. She wasn't
afraid because it was a small town and she lived
only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm
trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from
harm and danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a
short cut to her house, she decided to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she
noticed a man standing at the end as though he
were waiting for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray,asking
for God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and security wrapped round her, she felt as
though someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley,
she walked right past the man and arrived
home safely.

The following day, she read in the
newspaper that
a young girl had been raped in the same
alley just
twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
the fact that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
help this young woman, she decided to go to the
police station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so she told
them her story.

The police asked her if she would be
willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify
him.

She agreed and immediately pointed outthe
man she had seen in the alley the night
before.

When the man was told he had been
identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
and asked if there was anything they could do
for her.

She asked if they would ask the man one
question.

Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked her.

When the policeman asked him, he
answered, "Because she wasn't alone.
She had two tall men walking on either side of
her."

Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of
teenagers will not stand up for God?

Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly
believe in God..

PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you
no matter what...and if you stand up for him he will
stand up for you.
I bet 93 of you people that read this won't repost

(((((True love)))))
A guy and a girl were riding on a motorcycle...
Girl: slow down i'm scared.
Guy: no this is fun.
Girl: no it's not please it's way to scary!
Guy: then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you now slow down.
Guy: now give me a big hug.
She gave him a big hug.
Guy: can you take off my helmet & put it on yourself? it's bothering me.

-In the newspaper the next day a motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road the guy realized that the breaks were out and he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him she loved him one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so that she would live even if it meant that he would die. If you would do the same for a person you love then copy this into your profile

You know you live in 2010 when,

1.) You accidentaly enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) and you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

repost plz:This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

there were 3girls

They were looking through peoples
MySpaces.

The girl slowly came upon this one
myspace.

It had creatures in the background and the man
looked like a psycho.

She started laughing with her friend commenting on how ugly he was.

Right then, an instant message came up.

It said:

SatanStalker: So how do u like my
MySpace??

XxLoVemExX: What??

XxLoVemExX: Who is this anyway??

SatanStalker: Well, you should know;
youre looking at my MySpace right now.

XxLoVemExX: How do you know that im looking at ur pro??

SatanStalker:I know when people look at my MySpace.

XxLoVemExX: What? That doesnt make
any sense, how?

SatanStalker: I just do.

Satanstalker: Especially to pretty girls like you.

Satanstalker: With very nice legs I might say.

At the time the girl was wearing high
shorts.

She started to pull them down a little bit to cover what
ever she could. Her and her friend started to get
worried now.

XxLoVemExX: Ok whatever man youre starting to scare the living sht out of me.

SatanStalker: You should be afraid.

SatanStalker: You wouldnt want an ugly guy like me touching your legs huh? I mean thats what you
just said about me with your friend like a
minute ago.

They were in shock.

Her friend: Holy crap man just block him
hes a fcking psycho!

The girl: Ok holy crap, you think hes
watching us?

SatanStalker: I am.

SatanStalker: Well it wouldnt really
matter if you blocked me anyway; it wouldnt stop me
from coming to your house.

XxLoVemExX: What? My house?

SatanStalker: Yeah, youre alone so its
not a problem.

XxLoVemExX: Ok I think Im going to leave now because youre freaking me out.

SatanStalker: Your screen name says
love me, trust me that wont be a problem.

SatanStalker has just signed off.

The girl and her friend were really
scared. Girls

friend: Whatever lets just go upstairs trust me I doubt hes really coming. Its just a joke from someone.

They went upstairs and were having a pillow fight.

All of a sudden the girls friend said she had to go to the bathroom. The girl said ok.

Ten minutes later the girl noticed that her friend was
still in the bathroom and was wondering what was up.

She goes and knocks but no one said
anything

she opens it and finds her friend there on
the ground dead. She started to scream but when she
turned around he was there. News the next morning said that there was one girl dead in the bathroom;

her neck sliced with blood all over the ground. with her head nailed to the wall. Just her head.

If you do not repost this in the next two
minutes here will be three men, one in your
bathroom,

one in your room, and one killing your parents at that
very moment.

Tonight at 1:30am. Well what are you waiting for?

Repost or you are going to die.

This is why I DON'T have a Myspace.

25 Reasons Why I Owe My Mother

1. My mother taught me: TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE .
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me: RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me: TIME TRAVEL .
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me: LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me: MORE LOGIC .
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to
the store with me."

6. My mother taught me: FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident ."

7. My mother taught me: IRONY
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me:CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me: WEATHER
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me:HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me: THE CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me: ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me: RECEIVING .
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me: MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me: ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me: HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me: HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT .
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22.My Mother taught me: Genetics
"I swear you're just like your father."

23. My Mother taught me about my Roots.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My Mother taught me: Wisdom
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about Justice
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you"

thnx mom now do u think u culd teeach me how to be just as sarcastict as you.

bonus.-my mother taught me sarcasim.

" were going to hell in a ham basket now sit down and buckle your seatbelt."

hahaha repost if you owe your mom.

fave pairings:

Kyou/tohru

tohru/haru

tohru/yuki

rikimaru/ayame

ayame/tatsumaru

kag/kog

inu/kag

sess/kag

rukia/renji

rukia/ichigo

kisshu/ichigo

ryou/ichigo

Syaoran/Sakura

dark/daisuke

satoshi/dark

satoshi/daisuke

Trevor/Raven

Bella/Jacob (DO NOT BASH ME FOR THIS. HMPH!)

My fave anime, manga, and TV shows are Fruits Basket, Tokyo Mew Mew, and Sonny With A Chance.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your asses off.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever said anything random, and all you got was silence instead of laughter, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you like cookies, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you're still reading these copy and paste sentences, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you will never, ever, copy and paste a copy-and-paste statement on your profile, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away then remebered, copy this into your profile.

If you have a really bad memory, copy and...what was I doing again?

The Jacob Black Motto:

He's sexy,

He's hot,

He's all that Edward's NOT.

Oh, yeah, I went there!

-mrsnessieblack

If you're laughing your butt off right now, copy and paste this onto your profile.

I Love this!

Post this on your profile if you hate racism

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... only to tell the police to lynch him.

ven ways to anoy random people with random questions. i've asked all or most of these questions. if u plan on useing or have used any of these plz repost.

1.) what color is white bread? if they say white tell them you don't believe them and they need to prove it. if they pull out a sandwhich take it and run.

2.) would an elephant eat a penguin if so would the penguin fly up to peck out the E's(elaphant) eyes out or would you have to pick the p(penguin) up so it culd. and if the p cant already fly do u think in a million years it cul and if in a million years the penguin culd fly wuldnt it be cool to see it fly across the sky?

3.) what's your name? when they say their name rate how cute they are and say your a _(enter score there) and then walk away.

4.)do you have a dog? is it an alien? if they say no say. are u sure? cuz i think it has 4 eyes.

5.) how many fingers am i holding up( while flipping them off or making the peace sign)

6.)ask them what ur name is thewn laugh and say silly u don't know my name i'm a bug i don't have one.

7.)walk up to some one and say silly goose fred can't talk hes a fish

Did you know...

kissing is healthy.

bananas are good for period pain.

it's good to cry.

chicken soup actually makes you feel better.

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.

lying is actually unhealthy.

you really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

it's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move.

it's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.

chocolate will make you feel better.

most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

a good friend never judges.

a good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any.

boys aren't worth your tears.

we all love surprises.

Now... make a wish.

Wish REALLY hard!!

WISH WISH WISH WISH

Your wish has just been recieved.

Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...

Your wish will be granted.

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out

To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

Don't follow in my footsteps. I walk into walls.

I'm not random, i just have many tho- OH A SQUIRREL!

Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic.

Forever isn't as long as it use to be.

An apple away keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

I stay as confused as a gangster with a skateboard

Suicide is Man's way of telling God, 'You can't fire me, I quit.'

A day without sunshine is...night.

Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

Life sucks, and then you die.

I'm not afriad of Death. What's he going to do, kill me?

Advice is what we ask for when we already have the answer but wish we didn't.

Don'y play games with a girl who can play better.

If it wasn't for physics and the law, hell, I'd be unstoppable.

We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls, we're good at one thing, and that's staying strong.

In a world of cheerios, be a Froot-Loop.

Light travels faster than sound. That's why people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Want to know who your real friends are? Mess up and see who is still standing beside you.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

In order to get to heaven, you have to make a little hell.

Stop the heartache, rewind the good times, fast foward the bad things, and pause the unforgettable moments. The only reason people hold on to memories so tightly is because they are the only things that stay the same when everyone and everything changes.

Be careful who you trust, don't listen to anyone who gets in your way, do what you think is right, and forget what other people have to say.

Be crazy, be stupid, be wild, be silly. Because life's too short to worry about being cool.

Judge me and I'll prove you wrong. Tell me what to do, and I'll tell you off. Say I'm not worth it and watch where I end up.

Normality will be restored as soon as remember what it is.

Fear nothing. Risk everything.

Growing old is mandatory...but growing up my friends, well that is optional.

I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for someone I'm not.

True friends are hard to find, difficult to leave and impossible to forget.

We could all take a lesson from crayons: some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, all are different colors, but they learn how to live in the same box.

You have to take to good with the bad, smile with the sad, love what you got, remember what you had, always forgive, but never forget, learn from your mistakes, but never regret, people change, things gor wrong, but just remember that life goes on.

You may regret what you do, but you'll regret what you don't do even more.

Stand up for what you believe in, even is it means standing alone.

Love is like war, easy to begin, impossible to forget, and hard to end.

Today is the tomorrow we worried about yesterday.

Pain is inevitable, but suffering is not.

Anyone can give up. It's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it all together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that is true strength.

We're all a little weird. And life's a little weird. And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up in mutual weirdness and call it love.

There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters, who never did, who won't anymore, and who never will. So don't worry about the people in your past. There is a reason they didn't make it to your future.

I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let them go, things go wrong so that you can learn to appreciate them when they're right, you believe less so that you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so that better ones can come together.

You spend minutes, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation, trying to put the pieces back together, justifying what could've, would've happened. Or you just leave the pieces on the floor and try to move on.

The past. It's done. It's unchangeable. Move on.

¸.•´¸•´¨) ¸.•¨) ¸.•´¸.•´¨) ¸.•¨)
(¸.•´ (¸.•´~Pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, died, or is living with cancer

(\)_(/)
(='.'=)This is Bunny.
(")_(") Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.

98 of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you've ever tripped over your own toe, copy this to your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this to your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever stood straight up, then fell down for no apperent reason, copy this to your profile.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

Just because we eat animals for food, doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, ect, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever choked on your own spit, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you don't get what the simplest things mean, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile.

People of the world who HATE math UNITE! If you suck at math and think anyone who likes math is weird copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you believe that the pink bunnies of doom are really out to get you copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think that Writer's Block blows (sucks), copy and paste this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the tv.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile

If you've ever lost someone (cats count) you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you absolutely CANNOT live without one or all of these books series (Harry Potter, Twilight), copy and paste this into your profile!

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with a song you actually A) dream about it, B) sing it in school no matter who's listening or, C) know the lyrics by heart and sing it no matter how off key you are, copy and paste this into your profile.

65 percent of teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then reading ,if you are part of the 35 percent who read more than watch TV and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

A friend remembers your name. A best friend forgets theirs and uses yours.

If you plan on taking a trip to Scotland to see if Hogwarts is real, and then go to Italy to see if the Volturi are real, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you tell people that you are a "Muggle-born Squib whose letter to Hogwarts got lost with the owl", copy and paste this to your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you love rain, copy this into your profile.

If you think believe that the pink bunnies of doom are really out to get you copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like fire and fireworks and explosions and things that go boom, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever yelled at an inanimate object copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever wanted an inanimate object to go die copy and paste this into your profile

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile (WHOO I WIN!)

MainEntry: hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobiaSpeech: nDefinition:

fear of long words (Okay now that's just cruel, think about it. "Do you have a phobia?" "Yes" "What is it?" "It's hippopotomon-AHHHHH" "What's wrong?" "It's a long word!" I think the person who made this up is the same one who made lisp have an 's' in it)

One bright day in the middle of the night,

Two dead boys got up to fight.

Back to back they faced each other,

Draw their swords and shot each other.

One was blind and the other couldn't see,

So they chose a dummy for the referee.

A blind man went to see fair play,

A dumb man went to shout "Hooray!"

A paralysed donkey passing by,

Kicked the blind man in the eye.

Knocked him through a nine inch wall,

Into a dry ditch and drowned them all.

A deaf policeman heard the noise,

And ran to save the two dead boys.

And if you don't believe it's true,

Go ask the blind man, he saw it too.

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree. The
boys don’t want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
when )m 0 m( was your hero
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile.
I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian
I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant
I'm DIFFERENT so I MUST be looking for attention I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz (dirty blonde)
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed. I'm an HONEST PERSON, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm A WRITER so I MUST be crazy. I DON'T DO FASHION so I MUST be poor.
I'm NOT POPULAR so I MUST have no life.
I'm POPULAR so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm FRIENDLY so I MUST be fake I GOT SICK so I MUST be bulimic.
I WEAR GLASSES so I MUST be a nerd.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I write Fanfics, so I MUST be a freak. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I like to READ, so I MUST have a lot of free time
I love TWILIGHT so I MUST think about Edward or Jacob all the time
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I TALK TO BOYS so I MUST be a slut. I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. (part Irish)
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I TRY so I MUST be an over-acheiver
I act freaking CRAZY so i must be craving attention.
I LAUGH ALL THE TIME so i must be a party girl.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I am QUIET and POLITE, so I MUST be a pushover.
I don't act DEPRESSED, so I MUST be weird.
I am SKINNY, so I MUST be sensitive about my weight I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prud I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent. I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy. I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid. I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth. (part English)
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I an friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST play the bagpipes and eat haggis. (part Scottish) I DON'T WEAR MAKEUP so I MUST "think i'm all that".

9 Things I Hate About Everyone 1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their but to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see that?" No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.
8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do thats longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came, would I be standing here??

I told your ex he was gay and he slapped me with his purse

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run my little retarded friend, run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN! We messed up!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap!

Calling me STUPID won't make you SMART,

Calling me WEAK won't make you STRONG,

Calling me UGLY won't make you PRETTY,

Calling me POOR won't make you RICH,

Calling me FAT wont make you PERFECT,

Calling me UNCOOL wont make you COOL,

So why bother?

Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When i get to heaven I will ask Jonah."
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell ?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him?"

Great woman comebacks

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: Your eyes they're amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Woman: It's in the phone book

Man: But I don't know your name
Woman: That's in the phone book too

Man: I know how to please a woman
Woman: Then please leave me alone

Man: I can tell you want me.
Woman: Ohhhh, your so right, I want you to leave

Man: If you were a hamburger at McDonalds you would be McGorgeous
Woman: Would that be under your McLame Burger

Man: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven
Woman: Not nearly as bad as when you fell on planet rejection

Man: Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again
Woman: No, but sure...next time just be sure to keep walking

Man: I want to give myself to you
Woman: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts

Man: It's a good thing I have a library card because I'm checking you out
Woman: Sorry, I'm on reserve for someone else

YOUR GUY SIDE:

You love hoodies.
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt. (when I don't like them, its absolutely hilarious)
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night

YOUR GIRL SIDE:

You wear lip gloss/You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner.
You wear the color pink
You go to your mom for advice.
Chapstick.

You consider cheerleading a sport.

You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
Like being the star of every thing

19 yes I am not a guy!

2. Do you prefer light or dark haired guys? both

3. Are you currently frustrated with a boy? yes

4. Do you have a best friend(s)? yes the bestest most awesomest friend in the worl

5. Have you ever had your heart broken? In a way

6. Have you ever thought of having plastic surgery? never

7. Do you like your life? sometimes

8. Has one of your friends ever stolen a boyfriend from you? No my friends arr amazing

9. Have you ever jumped in the pool with your clothes on? Yup I “accidentally” fell once

10. Do you have more friends that are girls or boys? Its balanced

11. How long have you had Facebook? Like um, I dont remember

12. Have you ever slapped a boy in the face? Id like to try

13. What are your biggest fears? SPIDERS!!!!!!

14. Have you ever cried yourself to sleep? yes

15. Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind? Yes and it terribly sucks

16. Do you believe in the saying “Once a cheater, always a cheater”? No, second chances

17. Have you ever had a good feeling about something? Yes

18. Do you ever wish you were famous? In a way

19. Are you currently missing someone? Very much

This guy or that guy?

Punk/Goth or Gangster?: someone who doesn't pretend to be somebody else
Preppy or Cowboy?: a bit of both
Sweet or Sexy?: I like them balanced
Well-educated or Dropout?: well-educated
Armani or Abercrombie?: both
City-slicker or Rural Guy?: don't know what it means
Blue, green, grey, or brown eyes?: sweet eyes
Contacts or Glasses?: dont care

In a guy...
Funny or Serious?: both at the right times
Cute or Hot?: I just want them to be beautiful in the heart
Dark Eyes or Light Eyes?: l dont care
Long Hair or Short Hair?: depends

Curly Hair or Straight Hair?: depends
Good Dancer or Good Singer?: dont care
Jock or Rebel?: still dont care
Smoker or Non-smoker?: NON-SMOKEr
Druggie or Clean?: CLEAN!
Beard/Mustache or Clean-shaven?: Clean-shaven
Younger or Older?: Older
Player or Loyal?: loyal of course!

MAN1:i wasn't really that drunk last night

MAN2:really?i remember you running in the supermarket to the pineapples and yelling sponge bob i know your in there

Man 1: I wasan't that drunk last night.

Man 2: You walked up to a midget, gave them a mushroom and said "grow Super mario!"

DO NOT CLICK THIS!!!!!

OR THIS!!!!!!!!!