profile:

Anyway, I like books - most of them - and some movies (if they weren't ruined because we all know they butcher the ones that are based off of books). My all time favorite series is Warriors by Erin Hunter aka four different women writing the same series and my least favorite book is How To Train Your Dragon (I shall surprise all by telling you that they improved it greatly with the movie) and my least favorite movie is that Brothers Grimm movie (blame my parents, they brought this easily terrified, already traumatized eight year old at the time girl who hated that horse scene... it was okay until I saw that scene *shiver at memory*) I like all music and will laugh at Eddie Izzard's song Being For The Benefit Of Mr. Kite. It is, of course, not mine, sorry, old habits die hard... yeah I had these more stories I was working on and I was going to upload when I finally decided to get me a profile but they got deleted *mutters childish and mean things directed at brother.* I like video games and love to swim, I am an all around hateful and angry she-dog when someone messes up my day but I always manage to be nice to my friends and warn them when I've been having a pretty darn bad day.

Most people don't know this: Actually, technically Naminé isn't Kairi's Nobody, just play Kingdom Hearts II again, read the secret Ansem report 7 and be amazed, BE AMAZED I TELL YOU!

1. Do not introduce yourself as role-playing character in public.

2. Do not talk to fictional characters in public.

3. Do not answer fictional characters in public.

4. Do not talk to inanimate objects in public.

5. Do not go out in public.

6. Disregard last number. Do number 1-4.

7. Note Expressions.

8. Don't die alone. Take many people with you.

9. Floor is slippery when wet.

10. Lake is slippery when dry.

11. Only talk to strangers you know.

12. Strangers you don't know are spies...kill them all.

13. For legal purposes be sure to delete last note.

14. Tell people about the spies that are trying to kill you.

15. Kill them for security purposes.

16. Crying doesn't solve anything. Try violent mood swings.

17. Make a scene whenever humanly possible.

18. The men in white coats are not your friends.

19. Ask them for a room full of sharp, pointy objects.

20. When that doesn't work, ask for a designer jacket.

21. Chicken soup, although good for colds, not the best cure for drowning.

22. Flammable and inflammable mean the same thing.

23. Unlike fine wine, milk does not get better with age.

24. Always remember, uh...uh...damn.

25. Train armies of flying monkeys.

26. Goldfish don't like milk.

27. Do not maim people. If you already have, kill them to avoid lawsuits.

28. Find out who invented the word 'pianist'.

29. People are staring at you.

30. So act insane.

31. People are weird but not as weird as me.

32. Do not taunt animals at the zoo. They have feelings...and teeth.

33. Little people are aggressive. Stay away from little people.

34. Going through other people's stuff is a bonding experience. Do it as much as possible.

35. You'll sometimes notice shadows late at night. Don't worry, it's only me. Bonding.

36. Never pet a burning dog.

37. Never make eye contact with a naked man. Especially if you're wearing a parka.

38. Naked men dig parkas.

39. Beware the naked man who offers you his parka.

40. You know what would look good on you?

41. Immolated cockroaches.

42. Don't worry. It's only a harmless pimento bug.

43. The size of Danny DeVito.

44. Making an amusing facial expression. Like this.

45. Numbers are evil. Count in clovers.

46. Stalking is fun. Do it a lot.

47. Make a large sign saying, "Look at me, I'm a gumnut tree."

48. No matter what people say. There is a way into your fantasy world.

49. The way is rum.

50. Constipated people don't give a shit.

51. The Ten Steps to Dying.

a. Fall down.

b. Be rushed to hospital.

c. Not be saved.

d. Be mourned over.

e. Be buried in dirt.

f. Have your grave looted.

g. Rot.

h. Rot.

i. Rot.

j. Have your bones reanimated and used for pain, destruction and terror.

52. You cannot kill the snow.

53. The snow can kill you.

54. Grass can kill you too.

55. The leprechaun on the cereal box said I couldn't get his lucky charms.

56. Catch and castrate leprechaun.

57. He is real...no matter what the men in white say.

58. Staple paper in the middle of the page.

59. In case of blank looks, laugh maniacally.

60. You are not haxxor l337 or an uberhacker or anything like that.

61. Pretend to be so around the n00bs.

62. Do not go out with voice #7. He is a sadistic, soul-sucking demon.

63. Disregard last note. Go out with demon. Who needs a soul anyway?

64. Go ask Senior Diablo for bigger pitchfork.

65. Remember to kill HIM.

66. Tell the small children in the TOYS 'R' US that the dolls have an insatiable thirst for blood.

67. Note reactions. Avoid parents.

68. The blood of infants gives unholy superpowers according to Jhonen C. Vasquez. Test theory.

69. Scream. Doctors don't like it; they give you a shot of something nice.

70. Hide the bodies. Otherwise people will ask embarrassing questions.

71. Eat the evidence.

72. But not if it’s broken glass.

73. If in the presence of someone much wiser then you, point in a random direction and shout, "LOOK, a distraction." Then run.

74. Do not tell children that Santa is fat because he eats little children.

75. Disregard last note.

76. Note reactions.

77. On average, 100 people choke to death by ball point pens every year.

78. Stock up on ball point pens.

79. Learn to fly. Tell no one.

80. The secret to flying is throwing yourself at the ground and missing.

81. Do not stick fingers in a blender.

82. Blender...Bad...Ouch.

83. Blood loss is bad.

84. Find way to reattach fingers.

85. Scream as much as humanly possible at 2AM.

86. Answer every question with a question.

87. Ask people what gender they are.

88. Note reactions.

89. Refer to people as mortal.

90. The Seagull From Hell is out to get me.

91. Kill all enemies in most disturbing way possible.

92. Start by drowning them in fire ants.

93. Find the creators of pop-up messages.

94. Kill them.

95. Brutally.

96. Teachers don't like finding notes on world domination.

97. Dunk head in boiling water.

98. Disregard last note. Was written by voice #7.

99. Gullible is written on the ceiling.

100. Investigate this whole 'critical mass' when the klaxon dies down.

Just some things you need to know to survive….

(1) la-de-da-de-da

(2) The world is going to end so go bite off your big toe and be done with it….

(3) Black is the purdiest color of the rainbow…

(4) Most of the time the true geniuses are truly insane…

(5) I do not suffer from insanity… I enjoy every waking moment of it!

(6) Santa Claus is just a fat drunk guy in a red suit with fur…. Or possibly Michael Jackson… Or Orochimaru…

(7) MY SPORK CAN SO KICK YOUR SPORKS ASS!!….

(8) No woman does not like gay porn!!…

(9) Snack Packs are the nummiest pudding thingies out there!…

(10) Life’s Rough… Cry me a river and build a bridge over it!…

(11) You should listen to the voices in your head…. THEY HAVE SOME GOOD IDEAS!

(12) And Finally….

COME TO THE DARK SIDE… WE HAVE COOKIES!!

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting high meant swinging at a playground?
when your worst enemies were your siblings
and race issues were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity

1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “IN”

5. Put Decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to Expresso.

6. Finish all your sentences with “In accordance with the prophecy.”

7. Don't use any punctuation

8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

9. Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

10. Specify that your drive-through order is “To Go.”

11. Sing along at the Opera.

12. Go to a poetry recital and ask why all the poems don’t rhyme.

13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

14. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can’t attend their party because you’re not in the mood.

15. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I WON! I WON!”

16. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling,"Run for your lives, they’re loose!!"

17. Tell your children over dinner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.”

18. Go in front of your classroom and shout "I like pie!"

19. Greet all your friends with a tackle.

And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...

20. Copy and end this list to someone to make them smile... It's called therapy.

Girls Don't realize these things;

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'