Author has written 1 story for Harry Potter.
I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good.
Welcome to my page And I hope you enjoy my stories.
Age: I'm still in secondary.
Location: MOFO I ain't tellin' you.
Always...
Favorite Harry Potter Book Quotes:
There is no good and evil, there is only power, and those too weak to seek it. - Professor Quirrel, Philosopher's Stone
Ron: Why spiders? Why couldn't it be "follow the butterflies? - The Chamber of Secrets
Hermione: I hope you're pleased with yourselves. We could all have been killed — or worse, expelled.
George Weasley: "You haven't got a letter on yours," George observed. "I suppose she thinks you don't forget your name. But we're not stupid — we know we're called Gred and Forge."
Remus Lupin: Mr. Moony presents his compliments to Professor Snape, and begs him to keep his abnormally large nose out of other people's business.
James Potter: Mr. Prongs agrees with Mr. Moony, and would like to add that Professor Snape is an ugly git.
Sirius Black: Mr. Padfoot would like to register his astonishment that an idiot like that ever became a professor.
Peter Pettigrew: Mr. Wormtail bids Professor Snape good day, and advises him to wash his hair, the slimeball.
Hermione Granger: Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon doesn't mean we all have.
Fleur Delacour: What do I care how he looks? I am good-looking enough for both of us, I theenk! All these scars show is zat my husband is brave!
Molly Weasley: Not my daughter, you bitch!
Neville Longbottom: I'll join you when hell freezes over! Dumbledore's Army!
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
Ron: Don't talk to me.
Hermione: Why not?
Ron: Because I want to fix that in my memory forever…
Ron (his eyes closed): Draco Malfoy, the amazing bouncing ferret...
Guy: Where have you been all my life?
Girl: Hiding from you.
Guy: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Girl: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Guy: Is this seat empty?
Girl: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Guy: Your place or mine?
Girl: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Guy: So, what do you do for a living?
Girl: I'm a female impersonator.
Guy: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Girl: Do not enter.
Guy: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Girl: But would you stay there?
Guy: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Girl: Really? 'Cause I'd put f and u together.
Guy:Your eyes they're amazing.
Girl: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.
Guy: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
Girl: It's in the phone book
Guy: But I don't know your name
Girl: That's in the phone book too
Guy: I know how to please a woman
Girl: Then please leave me alone
Guy: I can tell you want me
Girl: Ohhhh, your so right, I want you to leave
Guy: If you were a hamburger at McDonalds you would be McGorgeous
Girl: Would that be under your McLame Burger
Guy: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven
Girl: Not nearly as bad as when you fell on planet rejection
Guy: Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again
Girl: No, but sure...next time just be sure to keep walking
Guy: I want to give myself to you
Girl: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts
Guy: It's a good thing I have a library card because I'm checking you out
Girl: Sorry, I'm on reserve for someone else
(if ur a girl that would say stuff like that then post this on your profile) Lolz, he just got SERVED!
10 Ways To Annoy People
1. Go Into A Grocery Store And Follow Someone Around Asking, "Guess What?"
2. Go Into A Department Store And Sneak Up On Somebody Who Is Talking On A Cell Phone And Whisper, "Who're Ya Talkin' To?" And When They Say, "Hey Dude, Can I Have A Little Privacy Please?" You Say, "No, 'Cause You're In Public, Bud. You Can't Have Privacy In Public!"
3. Do The Old Trick When You Put Dog Crap In A Bag Then Set It On Fire, And Leave It On Somebody's Doorstep. So If They're Going To Try To Stomp It Out, They Have To Get Dog Crap All Over Their Shoe.
4. Prank Call The Same Person Over And Over Asking Them What Color Their Underwear Is.
5. If You're A Guy, You'll Love This One. Go Into Hot Topic And Pretend To Have A Heart-attack, And When A Hot Blonde Does CPR, Start Kissing Her. (Warning: This One Can Get You Slapped And Maybe A Butt-whooping From Her Boyfriend)
6. Go Into A Public Restroom And Use The Toilet Paper As A Mummy Wrap, And Jump Out Screaming, "Boo!"
7. Come Running Out Of A Restroom Saying To Random People, "Whoa Dude! Come See The Size Of The One I Just Made!"
8. Noisily Chew Gum Behind Someone Who Is Trying To Read, And When They Turn Around, Spit It Out And Hold It Out To Them And Say, "Hey, Want Some? It's Watermelon!"
9. Go Into The Toy Section And Leave A 'Used Diaper' On The Ground And Say, "The Dolly Had An Accident."
10. Go Into A Mall At Christmas Time And Pull Off Santa's Beard Screaming, "Holy Cow! It's A Fake! He Ain't Real!"
9 Things I Find Annoying:
1. People Who Point At Their Wrist While Asking For The Time... I Know Where My Watch Is Pal, Where The Hell Is Yours? Do I Point At My Crotch When I Ask Where The Toilet Is?
2. People Who Are Willing To Get Off Their Ass To Search The Entire Room To Find The TV Remote Because They Refuse To Get Up And Change The Channel Manually.
3. When People Say, 'Oh You Just Want To Have Your Cake And Eat It Too.' Damn Right! What Good Is Cake If You Can't Eat It?
4. When People Say, 'It's Always The Last Place You Look.' Of Course It Is. Why The Hell Would You Keep Looking After You Found It? Do People Do This? Who And Where Are They? I'm Gonna Kick Their Asses!
5. When People Say While Watching A Film, 'Did You See That?' No Loser, I Spent 12 Dollars To Come To The Cinema And Stare At The Damn Floor.
6. People Who Ask, 'Can I Ask You A Question?' Didn't Really Give Me A Choice There, Did Ya Sunshine?
7. When Something Is 'New And Improved.' Which Is It? If Its New, Then There Has Never Been Anything Before It. If Its An Improvement, Then There Must Have Been Something Before It, So It Can't Be New.
8. When People Say, 'Life Is Too Short.' What The Hell? Life Is The Longest Damn Thing Anyone Ever Does! What Can You Do That's Longer?
9. When You're Waiting For The Bus And Someone Asks, 'Has The Bus Come Yet?' If The Bus Came, Would I Be Standing Here Dumbass?
When life gives you Lemons
When Life gives you lemons, throw them back, because I mean really? Who likes lemons?
When Life gives you lemons, make grape juice, sit back and watch the world wonder how.
When Life gives you lemons, squirt them in Life's eye, and see how much Life likes lemons then.
When Life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!
When life gives you lemons,make apple juice,then laugh while people try to figure out what the hell you did.
When life gives you lemons, chunck them at the people you hate.
When life hands you lemons, throw those lemons right back at it and tell life to make its own dang lemonade!
When life gives you lemons squirt them in life's eyes, then run far, far away.
()()
(0.0)
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Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies)
16 Things to do when your in Walmart!
1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"
16. Jack a Nintendo Wii by jacking a bike and riding out of the store.
25 Reasons I owe my mother.
1. My mother taught me to APPERCIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3.My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into next week."
4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORSIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about,"
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about weather.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
10. My mother taught me CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck."
11. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
" You'll sit there until all that spinich is gone."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a millon times. Don't exaggerate."
13. My mother taught me about the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!"
16. My mother taught me about about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home!"
17. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing you eyes, their going to freeze that way."
18. My mother taught me about RECIEVING.
" You are going to get it when we get home."
19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold."
20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come crying to me."
21. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."
22. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables you'll never grow up."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut the door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
" When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids and I hope they turn out just like you
FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella.
BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and say 'RUN BITCH RUN!'
FRIENDS:Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin, "THAT WAS FRICKING AWESOME!"
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore/Cry with you.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS:Return your stuff right away.
BEST FRIENDS:Keep your shit so long they forget its yours.
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's ass that left you.
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS:Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Bitch, drink the rest of that, you know we don't waste."
FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.
BEST FRIENDS:Will knock them the fuck out!
FRIENDS:Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
BEST FRIENDS:Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!
FRIENDS:Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
BEST FRIENDS:Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and say 'its because your gay isn't it?'
FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter.
BEST FRIENDS: Will re-post this crap!!
Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life
The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.
If you find this incredibly cute and touching, copy and paste it into your profile.
What a Boyfriend SHOULD Do:
When she walks away from you mad
Follow her
When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her
When she pushes you or hits you
Grab her and don't let go
When she starts yelling at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet
Ask her what's wrong
When she ignores you
Give her your attention
When she pulls away
Pull her back
When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared
Protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steals your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up
When she says that she likes you
she really does more than you could understand
When she grabs at your hands
Hold hers and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you
bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret
keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes
don't look away until she does
When she misses you
she's hurting inside
When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away
When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers
When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it -
Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.-
When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you-
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-
Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-
Tease her and let her tease you back.-
Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-
Give her the world.-
Let her wear your clothes.-
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-
Let her know she's important.-
Kiss her in the pouring rain.-
When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's butt am I kicking?"
There. Now follow this boys and you will have your girlfriend remember you forever.
(((((True love)))))
A guy and a girl were riding on a motorcycle...
Girl: slow down I'm scared.
Guy: no this is fun.
Girl: no it's not please it's way to scary!
Guy: then tell me you love me.
Girl: I love you now slow down.
Guy: now give me a big hug.
She gave him a big hug.
Guy: can you take off my helmet & put it on yourself? it's bothering me.
-In the newspaper the next day a motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road the guy realized that the breaks were out and he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him she loved him one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so that she would live even if it meant that he would die. If you would do the same for a person you love then copy this into your profile.
Cut Up Roses
