Truly Stupid Things Found On Other Stupid Things

On Sears hairdryer:

Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos:

You could be a winner! No purchase neccessary. Details inside.

On a bar of Dial soap:

Directions: Use like regular soap.

On some Swann frozen dinners:

Serving suggestion: Defrost.

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box):

Do not turn upside down.

On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding:

Product will be hot after heating.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:

Do not iron clothes on body.

On Boot's Childrens' Cough Medicine:

Do not drive car or opperate machinery.

On Nytol sleep aid:

Warning: May cause drowsiness.

On a Korean kitchen knife:

Warning: Keep out of children.

On a string of Christmas lights:

For indoor or outdoor use only.

On a food processor:

Not to be used for the other use.

On Sainsbury's peanuts:

Warning: Contains nuts.

On an American Airlines package of nuts:

Intructions: Open packet, eat nuts.

On a Swedish chainsaw:

Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

On a child's Superman costume:

Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.

This is so true...

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree. The
boys don’t want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

╔╗╔═╦╗ Put this on your site
║╚╣║║╚╗If you like to laugh!
╚═╩═╩═╝

If you have ever spelled your name wrong, copy this in your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy this in your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say right before you say it, copy this in your profile.

If you have ever hated someone with a fiery passion and wished they were tortured in some horrific way, copy this in your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy this in your profile.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuudge! If you are really random, copy this in your profile.

If you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, copy this in your profile.

If you've ever bumped into a chair and said, "Sorry," copy this in your profile.

If you've ever ran into a door, copy this in your profile.

If you've ever ran into a tree, copy this in your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy this in your profile.

If you have burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this in your profile.

If you and/or your best friend are insane, copy this in your profile.

If you have ever pushed a door that said PULL or vice versa, copy this in your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not normal, freak of nature, psychotic, random, or something similar, copy this in your profile.

65 percent of teenagers would rather watch T.V. than read. If you are one of the 35 percent that would rather have their nose stuck in a book, copy this in your profile.

92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. If you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing their butt off, copy this in your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese? Or when two foots are feet, why are two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random. If you're random (or can be at sometimes) and proud of it, copy this in your profile.

If you've ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes, copy this in your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy this in your profile.

If you think those stupid kids should give the rabbit some friggin' Trix, copy this in your profile.

If you think the Coa-Coa Puff Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this in your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the friggin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, copy this in your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or the combination of both, copy this in your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy this in your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you, copy this in your profile.

FUN THINGS TO DO AT WALMART!

1.) Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2.) Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.

3.) Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in Housewares"... and see what happens.

4.) Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5.) Move a 'CAUTION--WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6.) Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7.) When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8.) Look right into a security camera and use it as a mirror to pick your nose.

9.) While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

10.) Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

11.) In the auto department, practice your 'Madonna look'.

12.) Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through say, "Pick me! Pick me!"

13.) When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No! No! It's the voices again!"

14.) Go into the fitting room and shut the door and wait awhile, then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!"

15.) Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle while shouting, "Go, Pikachu, go!"

16.) Pass out bananas to random people and snicker loudly when they take one.

17.) Buy 350 can of tuna and scream, "This can't be right! You have to put some back!" when the cashier tells you the price.

18.) Walk around looking confused in the CD section and ask people where you can find the CDs.

19.) Start a fish-stick fight.

20.) Walk up to random people, give them bear hugs, and say very loudly that you missed them and that they never did get that dandruff shampoo you recommended.

21.) Jump in a cart and have a friend push you while you scream, "The Germans are coming!"

22.) Attempt to fly off a high shelf.

23.) Throw confetti on random people as they walk into the store.

24.) Whisper, "I know your little secret" to people in the check-out lines.

25.) Stand inside the freezer in the frozen food section.

26.) Ask the clerk to make a page saying, "If there is an Edward in the store, Bella is looking for you at the main info desk."

27.) Walk into the baby clothes section, pick up a baby pink dress, then throw it down and run away screaming that the pink bunnies of doom came back.