The rules of a writer

1) Write.

2) Express yourself in a simple way: don't be prosopopoeic.

3)Do not use abbreviations & acronyms , etc.

3) Be careful not to ... ehmm .. use ... too many ... ellipses.

4) Use as little inverted commas as possible: it's not "elegant".

5)Use the punctuation properly: it can change the meaning of a sentence. Example:

#)Let's go eat, Grandpa!
#)Let's go eat Grandpa!

See? You've just saved a Grandpa.

6) Do not be redundant, don't repeat the same thing twice; to repeat things is superfluous (for redundancy I mean the unnecessary explanation of something the reader has already figured out).

7) Only assholes use vulgar words, so be fucking polite. You dumbass.

8) Do not use excessive metaphors: they are like feathers on the scales of a snake.

9) Do we really need rhetorical questions?

10) Do not be emphatic! Be stingy with exclamation marks!!!!!!!!!!

11) Spell correctly important names such as , Nietzsche, Santa Claus, Chuck Norris.

12) Appoint directly authors and characters, without circumlocutions. That is what the most important English-language poet of the 20th century, the author of " The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock", used to do.

13) At the beginning of a speech use the captatio benevolentiae to ingratiate yourself with your readers (but maybe you're so stupid that you don't understand what I'm saying).

14) Try to sppell worsds corecctly.

15) Do not start too often a new paragraph.
At least, not when there is no need to.

16) You do not have to be lenghty, but you should, at least,