I am 18 and am now editing my stories etc.ect.now for semoehtnig itnresitng...

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty
uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal
pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a
rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't
mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the
olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer
be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl
mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed
ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling
was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

Take Time To Read Each Sentence

This is this cat

This is is cat

This is how cat

This is to cat

This is keep cat

This is a cat

This is retard cat

This is busy cat

This is for cat

This is forty cat

This is seconds cat

Now read the THIRD word of every line. X

Paste this on your profile if you pissed yourself laughing when you read it. And you know you did ;P

50 Things to do on the First Day of Class

Smoke a pipe and respond to each point the professor makes by waving it and saying, "Quite right, old bean!"

Wear X-Ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to focus the overhead projector.

Sit in the front row and spend the lecture filing your teeth into sharp points.

Sit in the front and color in your textbook.

When the professor calls your name in roll, respond "that's my name, don't wear it out!"

Introduce yourself to the class as the "master of the pan flute".

Give the professor a copy of The Watchtower. Ask him where his soul would go if he died tomorrow.

Wear earmuffs. Every few minutes, ask the professor to speak louder.

Squint thoughtfully while giving the professor strange looks. In the middle of lecture, tell him he looks familiar and ask whether he was ever in an episode of Starsky and Hutch.

Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test. If the professor says no, rip the pages out of your textbook.

Become entranced with your first physics lecture, and declare your intention to pursue a career in measurements and units.

Sing your questions.

When the professor calls roll, after each name scream "THAT'S MEEEEE! Oh, no, sorry."

Insist in a Southern drawl that your name really is Wuchen Li. If you actually are Chinese, insist that your name is Vladimir Fernandez O'Reilly.

Speak only in rhymes and hum the Underdog theme.

Page through the textbook scratching each picture and sniffing it.

Wear your pajamas. Pretend not to notice that you've done so.

Hold up a piece of paper that says in large letters "CHECK YOUR FLY".

Inform the class that you are Belgian royalty, and have a friend bang cymbals together whenever your name is spoken.

Stare continually at the professor's crotch. Occassionally lick your lips.

Address the professor as "your excellency".

Sit in the front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the professor if he's been drinking.

Shout "WOW!" after every sentence of the lecture.

Bring a mirror and spend the lecture writing Bible verses on your face.

Ask whether you have to come to class.

Present the professor with a large fruit basket.

Bring a "seeing eye rooster" to class.

Feign an unintelligible accent and repeatedly ask, "Vet ozzle haffen dee henvay?" Become aggitated when the professor can't understand you.

Relive your Junior High days by leaving chalk stuffed in the chalkboard erasers.

Watch the professor through binoculars.

Start a "Mexican wave" in a large lecture hall.

Ask to introduce your "invisible friend" in the empty seat beside you, and ask for one extra copy of each handout.

When the professor turns on his laser pointer, scream "AAAGH! MY EYES!"

Correct the professor at least ten times on the pronunciation of your name, even if it's Smith. Claim that the 'i' is silent.

Sit in the front row reading the professor's graduate thesis and snickering.

As soon as the first bell rings, volunteer to put a problem on the board. Ignore the professor's reply and proceed to do so anyway.

Claim that you wrote the class text book.

Claim to be the teaching assistant. If the real one objects, jump up and scream "IMPOSTOR!"

Spend the lecture blowing kisses to other students.

Every few minutes, take a sheet of notebook paper, write "Signup Sheet" at the top, and start passing it around the room.

Stand to ask questions. Bow deeply before taking your seat after the professor answers.

Wear a cape with a big S on it. Inform classmates that the S stands for "stud".

Interrupt every few minutes to ask the professor, "Can you spell that?"

Disassemble your pen. "Accidentally" propel pieces across the room while playing with the spring. Go on furtive expeditions to retrieve the pieces. Repeat.

Wink at the professor every few minutes.

In the middle of lecture, ask your professor whether he believes in ghosts.

Laugh heartily at everything the professor says. Snort when you laugh.

Wear a black hooded cloak to class and ring a bell.

Ask your math professor to pull the roll chart above the blackboard of ancient Greek trade routes down farther because you can't see Macedonia.

Things to do at The Movies

1. When you are choosing a seat, point at someone and say loudly in a childish voice, "I don't want to sit to that guy, he smells funny!"

2. Everytime there is a gun shot, scream, "Hit the floooor!", jump to the floor and cover your head.

3. Quote all dialogue five seconds after it's said on screen.

4. Ask the person at the ticket counter "Do you come here often?"

5. Start an standing ovation at the end of the movie.

6. Become a bookie. Take bets on which character (or audience member) will die first.

7. Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing"

8. Clap and cheer when the good guys gets killed.

9. During the previews, yell out "Can you fast foward it please?"

10. Try to start a Mexician wave

11. Argue that no-one can sit next to you because the seats alreadly taken by your invisible friend.

12. Stand up during the picture and announce to the others the movies twist.

13. Shout "look behind you!" at the actors.

14. Wear 3D glasses. Complain about how bad the effects are.

15. Everytime someone curses, cover your ears and shout "oh the fucking profanity!"

16. Hum the theme music.

17. Bring a flashlight. During the film, perform a shadow puppet show on the ceiling.

18. Go "Ooooooooooh..." whenever someone kisses.

19. Wear a huge fake afro wig, blocking the person behind you's view.

20. Shout out "Help, I'm a beautiful butterfly"

21. Clap loudly everytime a person walks into the theater late.

22. Enquire what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.

23. Ask a friend to sit four seats beside you and to call you to your mobile phone, answer after a few rings and start to talk loudly about any anoying subjects you can or about the movie.

black dot...

im here but also not

i am the black dot

i see a perfect blue wall

i watch the black dot, i was there after all

i live in the night

i do what i like

i play but not by the book

i walk but dont get a second look

i talk but no one listens

i see the moon glistens

i am a freak

i am the black dot on the blue wall

This Is Who I Am'

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace,or talking to a girlfriend on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.:HarryArtemis1220, edwardcullenissosexy, i love the twilight series, Macyn Cullen, XxAngel GirlxX, Singing in the Shadows..., Hermitt, y.cant.i.be.invisible,twilightfanatic247 }lOSTdARKaNGEL{

Month one

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

If you are so cool that you actually read through all of these (there's more BWHAHAHAHA!!), copy this into your profile!!

If you've ever yelled at an inatimate object for not listening to you, copy and paste this into your profile.

If that inatimate object now hates you more because you yelled at it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile.

If you hate Mike and you're not afraid to say it, paste this into your profile

If you think Jessica can be annoying paste this into your profile

If you think Jessica and Mike belong together because they're both annoying and stupid, paste this into your profile

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile.

If you are frequently told to be quiet/shut the hell up, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped on a person, copy this into your profile.

Drugs are bad news. Spread the word.Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your bio.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile. :D

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever shouted out the first thing that comes to mind, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever shouted out random thing and then gotten glared at copy and paste this to your profile

Remeber I DID NOT write this, it is from someone else, but please, pick the right choice

My name is Tiffany

I am three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid

I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren’t ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can’t do a wrong

I can’t speak at all

Or else im locked up

All day long.

When im awake im all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren’t home

When my mommy does come home

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe ill just get

One whipping tonight.

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie’s bar.

I hear him curse

My name is called

I press myself

Against the wall

I try to hide

From his evil eyes

I’m so afraid now

I’m starting to cry

He finds me weeping

Calls me ugly words,

He says its my fault

He suffers at work.

He slaps and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And run to the door

He’s already locked it

And i start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken,

"I’m sorry!", I scream

But its now much to late

His face has been twisted

Into a unimaginable shape

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

O please God, have mercy!

O please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door

While i lay there motionless

Brawled on the floor

My name is tiffany

I am three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me

And you can help

Sickens me top the soul,

And if you read this

and don’t pass it on

I pray for your forgiveness

Because you would have to be

One heartless person

To not be effected

By this Poem

And because you are effected,

Do something about it!

So all I ask you to do

Is pass this on!

IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE

Please pass it on

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, EdwardAddict, Supergirrl, Elemental-ANimal, Mother Nature's Daughter, Nazgul Queen, Admiral Norrington, iamanundeadmonkey, Jibblez, everest rossum, the Icelandic Sheep, Something Dangerous, Iz Cameron, sassyfiestycrazychic

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you walk and trip or stumble because your too busy reading a book copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are obsessed with fan-fiction copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan-fictions, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

If you have ever wondered why the heck Canadians and Americans have to spell 'colour' differently, and use different units of measurement, copy this to your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?"

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, copy this into your profile

If you love black, but are no goth, copy this on your Profile

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

I like eggs. Tigers are pretty. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, which I am, but I'm also random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile

If you have ever yelled at the book you were reading because the characters did something stupid post this on your profile.

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity, copy and paste this into your profile! XD

There's a 13 year old girl, and she wished
that her dad would come home from
the army, because he'd been having
problems with his heart and right
leg. It was 2:53 p.m . When she made
her wish. At 3:07 p.m. (14 minutes
later), the doorbell rang, and
there her Dad was, luggage and all!!

I'm Katie and I'm 20 and I've been
having trouble in my job and on the
verge of quitting. I made a simple
wish that my boss would get a new
job. That was at 1:35 and at 2:55
there was an announcement that he
was promoted and was leaving for
another city. Believe me...this
really works!

My name is Ann and I am 45 years
of age. I had always been single
and had been hoping to get into a
nice, loving relationship for many
years. While kind of daydreaming
(and right after receiving this email)
I wished that a quality person would
finally come into my life. That was at
9:10 AM on a Tuesday. At 9:55 AM
a FedEx delivery man came into my
office.He was cute, polite and
could not stop smiling at me. He
started coming back almost everyday
(even without packages) and asked me
out a week later. We married 6
months later and now have been
happily married for 2 years.

What a great email it was!!

Just scroll down to the end, but
while you do, think of a wish.
Make your wish when you have completed
scrolling. Whatever age you are, is the
number of minutes it will take for your
wish to come true. ex.you are 25 years
old, it will take 25 minutes for your wish
to come true).

Go for it!

SCROLL DOWN!

STOP!

Congratulations! Your wish will
now come true in your age minutes.

Now follow this carefully...it
can be very rewarding!

If you repost this within the next 5 min.
something major that you've been wanting
will happen.

This is scary!

The phone will ring right after you repost!