Hello! I just returned from a vacation and my sister introduced me to this site. So I was thinking I would grace you with my knowledge of Twilight and Boxcar children and a whole bunch of other things you probably care nothing about! Like:

1. Jasper only is the worst vegetarian in the world because he feels the emotions and thirst of his family!

2. Alice is a pixie on drugs!

3. Rosalie has a stick up her ass!

4. Emmett is on steroids!

5. Esme belongs in a mental institution!

6. Carlisle is secretly in love with Charlie!

7. Jacob looks like bigfoot and they have the same IQ!

8. Jessica is egostistcal bitch who's in love with a golden retriever!

9.Mike is said golden retriever. He's going to grow a tail any day now!

10. Lauren needs to get laid!

11.Eric . . . (shudders) Moving on!

12. James is a dumbass!

13. Victoria. . . here, kitty, kitty, kitty!

14. Laurent is a two-faced, lying, gay guy!

15.Edward and Bella . . . tower over the rest of us as we weep from a far as we wish and wish to be even the smallest resemblance of them. (Sighs)