Hi, people! Have you ever noticed how fun the exclamation point is? !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Isn't that fun?

I am not a Jedi, but I wish I were. If I were, I would get a cool laser sword, but me with one of those is bad news. But maybe the Sith would take me. I wonder...

I love reading, and my favorite author is J.R.R. Tolkien. I also fence, and I like to stab things with pointy objects. I play piano, trombone, drums, and I sing. I also enjoy reading and writing fan fiction.

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On a bag of Frito's:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(And that would be how?)

On some Swan frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On Boot's Childrens cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nylon sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(Hmm... something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain saw with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh, go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

Thanks to the people off of whose profiles I stole these!

READ THE FOLLOWING SENTENCES CAREFULLY.

This is this cat.

This is is cat.

This is how cat.

This is to cat.

This is keep cat.

This is a cat.

This is loser cat.

This is busy cat.

This is for cat.

This is forty cat.

This is seconds cat.

NOW GO BACK AND READ THE THIRD WORD OF EVERY SENTENCE.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ha ha... ha...ha. Ha.

Jedi Code

There is no emotion, there is peace.

There is no ignorance, there is knowledge.

There is no passion, there is serenity.

There is no chaos, there is harmony.

There is no death, there is the Force.

The Sith Code

Peace is a lie, there is only passion.

Through passion, I gain strength.

Through strength, I gain power.

Through power, I gain victory.

Through victory, my chains are broken.

The Force shall free me.

MY Code

If it moves, kill it.

If it doesn't move, kill it anyway.

Hay guys im starting up my fan fiction again but my stories will be taking a darker turn. my other story is going to be left on my story's list but will not be continued.