The icon to the left was drawn by my sister, Nanosoul, not me!

If I forget to put this in my stories, I do not own Portal!

About Me:

Hello! My name is [Redacted]! I love Portal! I also have a DeviantArt account, I go by Topaz18 there too, but warning, I really fail at drawing! Anyway, I get my username from my favorite gem, topaz, and my lucky number, 18. I really don't know much of what else to say...

I am an overall average person, not really in an awesome way though... I am smart, but not super smart, I am slightly good at writing, but not that good at it. I don't really have a true, awesome talent, but I guess I'll let you guys read my stories if you want to!

Name:

Samantha (But I really don't like that name...)

Gender:
Female!

Age:

Pre-teen

Appearance:
Brown poofy hair, green-ish gray eyes, glasses. Usually wears abstract shirts with no logos and always wears a black watch wherever I go!

Religion:

Christian

Favorite Songs:

Lighthouse by The Hush Sound

Beautiful Things by Gungor

Mad World by Gary Jules

Eternity by Paul van Dyk

Favorite Video Games:

Portal 2

Half-life 2

Left 4 Dead 2

Slender

Alan Wake

Assassin's Creed

Favorite TV Shows:

Doctor Who

The Walking Dead

Azumanga Daioh

My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic (Don't judge me!!!)

Favorite Books:
Ashes by Ilsa J. Bick

Gone by Micheal Grant

Homestuck by Andrew Hussie (I think that counts as a book)

The Hunger Games by Susan Collins

And much, much, more that I can't think of at the moment!

Things I dislike a lot:

People tapping me on the head

People in my space bubble

Monkeys (They are just creepy)

Bad language

Little things I enjoy:

The smell of the air after it rains

The taste of brownie mix

Listening

The smell of dust after rain

Hammocks

Inanimate objects

The wind on my face

Shade

Being half-asleep

When you write a story and it is not you writing the story, but your imagination is

When you read a book for a long time, and then you notice that you aren't in the story (Actually I don't like that last part, but I love being in the story)

My Life Is Average (If you have never heard it, search it, is the second most awesome site ever (Next to Fanfiction))

There are lots more, but for now, I will just leave it as it is...

A Random Quiz Thingy:

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT? I have none, I have never been injured other than a few scrapes

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM? Umm... Awards and Artwork

3. DO YOU SNORE, GRIND YOUR TEETH, OR TALK IN YOUR SLEEP? How would I know?

4. WHAT TYPE OF MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO? Basically anything, as I already said

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN? No

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW? To be able to finish writing a story

7. WHAT DO YOU MISS? Umm... Nothing?

8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION(S)? My iPod

9. HOW TALL ARE YOU? 5' 2''

10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC? I am fine with inanimate objects, but I CANNOT stand being surrounded by people

11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK? Only after I read or watch something to raise my paranoia

12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY? Whoever wrote My Little Dashie

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PERFUME FOR A GIRL? I don't wear any

14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX? Brown eye color

15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF BEING PROPOSED TO? I don't know!

16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK? Niether

17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING? Bacon

18. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Cookies!

21. WHAT WAS THE FIRST MEANINGFUL GIFT YOU'VE EVER RECEIVED? Umm... My mind?

22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY? I guess if you count fictional characters

23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED? Yes, thumbs, arms, toes, shoulders.

24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND? I don't know!

26. DO YOU HAVE A PET RIGHT NOW? Yes

27. WHAT KIND IS IT? Tuxedo Cat

28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING? Sure

29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU? Write a song, poem, book, or something like that

30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED: 18, my favorite number. Kind of obvious, being Topaz18

31. BLONDS OR BRUNETTES? Umm... Brunettes?

32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN? I just got a phone, I haven't called anyone yet

33. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST? Monkies

34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF THE USA? No

35. YOUR WEAKNESSES? Umm... *shrugs*

36. MET ANYONE FAMOUS? My sister's pastor was on Biggest Loser once

37. FIRST JOB? Too young

38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL? No

41.WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE FILLING THIS OUT? Reading this on someone else's profile

41. HAVE YOU EVER HAD SURGERY? No, don't ask why the bold is switched

42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST? Umm... Being smart?

43. HAVE YOU EVER HAD BRACES? No, and I don't need any

44. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY? Itunes gift card

45. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT? None

46. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I don't think so...

47. DO YOU WISH ON STARS? Nah

49. WHAT KIND OF SHAMPOO DO YOU USE? Why would you want to know?

50. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? No, it fails

51. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE MEAT? Bacon!

52. ANY BAD HABITS? Twirling hair and not being able to sit still

53 WHAT CD ARE YOU MOST EMBARRASSED TO HAVE ON YOUR SHELF? Nothing really

54. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I don't know!

56. DO LOOKS MATTER? Not really

57. HOW DO YOU RELEASE ANGER? I write it (See the third chapter of Ponderings)

58. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME? Books, my mind.

60. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD? I don't know, I forgot

61. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR CELL PHONE? Somewhere around seven? Again, I just got it.

62. WERE YOU A FAN OF BARNEY AS A KID? No

63. DO YOU USE SARCASM? *No, not at all* Notice the sarcasm stars

64. MASHED POTATOES OR MACARONI AND CHEESE? Mashed Potatoes

65. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A GUY/GIRL? Smart, nice, knows what I am talking about when I start to talk about something I like

66. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES? I don't really have any...

67. WHATS YOUR FAVORITE BAND/SINGER? NeedtoBreathe

68. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVOURITE TV SHOWS? Doctor Who, Azumanga Daioh, and Walking Dead

69. WHAT WAS YOUR ACT SAT SCORE? I haven't taken it yet

70. WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOUR? Moo-lenium

71. DO YOU HAVE ALL YOUR FINGERS AND TOES? Yes

72. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WORKED OUT? P.E. Class

73. DID YOU NOTICE THAT THERE WAS NO #64? Don't try to trick me!

74. WHATS THE FASTEST YOU HAVE GONE IN A CAR? I haven't driven a car

75. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO ANSWER THESE QUESTIONS? Umm... Maybe

76. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO? Portal Testing Songs

78. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? i don't talk on the phone, I text

79. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE IN THE OPPOSITE GENDER? Eyes

80. FAVORITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG? Exile Vilify

81. FAVORITE THING TO HATE? Monkeys

82. FAVORITE MONTH OF THE YEAR? April

83. FAVORITE ZODIAC SIGN? What's that again?

85. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOUR? Light Brown

86. EYE COLOR? Green-ish, Gray-ish, Blue-ish with an orange burst in the middle

89. FAVORITE FAST FOOD RESTURANT? Whataburger

90. YOU LIKE SUSHI? No, I hate sushi

91. LAST THING YOU WATCHED? The Matrix

92. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? *shrugs*

93. PLAY ANY MUSICAL INSTRUMENTS? Piano

94. REPUBLICAN OR DEMOCRAT? ?

95. KISSES OR HUGS? Neither

96. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE NIGHT STANDS? Not answering that

97. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU BOUGHT? The song Toeto on ITunes

98. WHAT KIND OF CAR DO YOU HAVE? A giant invisble unicorn

99. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? Num8ers

100. DESCRIBE YOUR LOVE LIFE: I have no life. (Hehe)

Random Paradoxes:

-The following statement is true. The previous statement is false

-New mission: Refuse this mission!

-This statement is false!

-Does a set of all sets contain itself?

-Does a portal that leads to all portals lead to itself?

-A girl goes into the past and kills her grandmother. Because of that, the girl was never born. Thus, she never killed her grandmother.

-On the subject of time travel, what if you built a time machine, went into the past-the point before you started designing the machine-and gave yourself the plans for the time machine?

-It is 0 degrees outside today. The weatherman says that it will be twice as cold tomorrow. What will the temperature be tomorrow?

-What would happen if you were in a car driving at the speed of light and you turned the headlights on?

-Answer truthfully with yes or no: Will your answer be 'no'?

-PM me if you don't read this.

-Nobody goes to that restaurant; it's too crowded.

The Guide to Maintaining a Healthy Level of Insanity as a Test Subject

AKA: The Guide to Being a Very Annoying Test Subject

Basic Level of Insanity:

1. Whenever possible, skip instead of walk.

2. Wave enthusiastically at every camera you see

3. Jump up and down on the buttons

4. Randomly burst out laughing in the middle of a test

5. Laugh hysterically at almost everything GLaDOS says

6. Whenever you see something shiny, thoroughly investigate it for at least 10 minutes

7. Stare blankly into space for a little while, then jerk like you just came back to reality and politely ask GLaDOS to repeat what she just said… even if she didn’t say anything

8. End almost all of your sentences with “in accordance to science”

9. Dodge roll to avoid turrets

10. If GLaDOS ever asks you why you are doing any of these things, reply in a very childish voice, “Because it’s fuuuun!”

Secondary Level of Insanity:

1. Whenever you see one of the smaller buttons that are on a pedestal, turn you back to whatever it activates and repeatedly press it saying, “It’s not working!!”

2. Randomly burst into song while testing – songs that are completely random or Disney songs are recommended

3. Whenever you are soaring through the air, like with faith plates or flinging, do flips. If you are uncomfortable with flipping, strike superhero poses

4. Strike superhero poses or run in slow motion whenever you are in an excursion funnel

5. Salute the cameras and refer to GLaDOS as ‘comrade’ in a very serious tone

6. Randomly start dancing, preferably in front of a camera (this works best if you have a testing partner)

7. Ask GLaDOS what gender she is. During her long explanation, nod and look serious. After she’s done, laugh hysterically

8. Repeatedly ask GLaDOS where the bathroom is. Explain that you do not have to go to the bathroom (unless you do have to go, that is), but think that it’s location is crucial to your mission

9. Randomly speak in different accents

10. Whenever GLaDOS orders you to do something, salute and say “Yes, sir!” and march while you do it

Tertiary Level of Insanity:

1. About the bathroom one in the previous level: Keep doing that, but explain that you want to know where the bathroom is so you can hunt the kraken

2. Whenever possible, stand beside a turret, just out of its line of sight, and try to have a civil conversation with it

3. Whenever possible, instead of killing it, put a turret’s face against the wall, pat it and say, “Be a good turret, now!” (do this after #2)

4. If you obtain a companion cube, look at it seriously and say, “I shall call him Cubie and he shall be mine. And he shall be my Cubie.”

5. Complain about the way the regular cubes treat you

6. Go through an entire test chamber in slow motion. After that chamber is completed, proceed normally like nothing happened

7. Strike a random pose in front of a camera and stay as still as possible for as long as you can

8. Tell GLaDOS that you’re fairly certain you got here by falling down a rabbit hole

9. Give everything completely random and unfitting nicknames (for example, start calling cubes ‘magic school buses’ or something) and call them these things out loud

10. And now, the absolutely most insane way to be healthily insane: Escape from the testing track and go straight to the Central AI Chamber. Once you’re there, look at GLaDOS very seriously and say, “Just so you know, a test subject escaped.” If possible, leave the chamber and return to the testing track. Keep testing like nothing happened.

Note: Remember that when you reach a level of insanity, you do everything in that level as well as everything in the previous levels. You probably already figured this out, but…

Favorite Quotes;

"I have your brain scanned and permanently backed up in case something terrible happens to you. Which it's just about to. Don't believe me? Here, I'll put you on: 'Helloooo!' That's you! That's how dumb you sound!"

"Do you think you're doing some damage?! 2 plus 2 is (bzzt) ten. IN BASE FOUR! I'M FINE!"

"Oh hi. So, how are you holding up? BECAUSE I'M A POTATO."

"Oh good, my slow clap processor made it into this thing. So we have that."

"Did you know that people with guilty consciences are more easily startled by loud noi- *train horn*. I'm sorry, I don't know why that went off. Anyway, just an interesting science fact."

"It's not out of the question that you might have a veeeery minor case of serious brain damage. But, don't be alarmed, alright? Although, if you do feel alarmed, try to hold onto that feeling because that is the proper reaction to being told that you've got brain damage."

"AH!! Oh, god. You look terri-um, good, looking good actually."

GLaDOS: Most people emerge from suspension terribly undernourished. I want to congratulate you on beating the odds and somehow managing to pack on a few pounds.

Cave Johnson: [Cave Johnson died long before the events of the game. Chell and GLaDOS are listening to his last recorded words, a message for his human test subjects, which he made while he was deathly ill] All right, I've been thinking, when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade!
GLaDOS: Yeah.
Cave Johnson: Make life take the lemons back!
GLaDOS: Yeah!
Cave Johnson: Get Mad!
GLaDOS: Yeah!
Cave Johnson: I don't want your damn lemons! What am I supposed to do with these?
GLaDOS: Yeah, take the lemons!
Cave Johnson: Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man whose gonna burn your house down - with the lemons!
GLaDOS: Oh, I like this guy.
Cave Johnson: I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that'll burn your house down!
GLaDOS: Burn it down! Burning people. He says what we're all thinking.

GLaDOS: [after Chell steps on an Aerial Faith Plate for the first time] Look at you, soaring through the air like an eagle... piloting a blimp.

Wheatley: All right, so that last test was seriously disappointing. Apparently, being civil isn't motivating you, so let's try it her way, all right, fatty? Adopted... fatty! Fatty, fatty no parents?
GLaDOS: And...?
Wheatley: What?
GLaDOS: What exactly is wrong with being adopted?
Wheatley: What's wrong with being adopted? Um, well, uh, Lack of parents?
GLaDOS: [to Chell] For the record, you are adopted and that's terrible. Just work with me.
Wheatley: Some of my my best friends are actually orphans.
GLaDOS: Also, look at her, you moron. She's not fat.
Wheatley: I AM NOT A MORON! Just do the test; just do the test.

Random Little Copy and pasting thingys

-Look at me, still talking when there's science to do. When I look out there, it makes me GLaD I'm not you!

Are you a girl? Have you ever been told by someone of the male gender that, "Girls can't game" or "Girls can't do anything"???

Copy & Paste this to your page if you believe that boys do not have the right to say that and that girls are capable and can definetly do anything that they can! Sign your pen-name here!

Fidofia, Topaz18

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you think that writing fanfics is fun, put this in your profile!

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile.

.eliforp ruoy otni etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI (Omg i read it backwards! O-o)

If you looked at my profile just to find random quotes or stuff to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think it's stupid that girls are automatically labeled with the color pink, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile

-90% of teens today would die if Facebook had a system failure and was completely destroyed. If you are of the 10% that would die laughing, copy and paste this into your profile. Note that 100% of the human population dies.

-95% of the America's girl teen population would cry, scream, and wail if Justin Beiber decided to throw himself off a skyscraper. Paste this on your profile if you're one of the 5% who would sit at the bottom of the skyscraper with popcorn and a tape recorder yelling "DO A FLIP!"

-If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

-If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Can you raed tihs? I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. If you can raed tihs cpoy and ptsae tihs itno yuor pirlofe.

Copy and paste these if you are OBSESSED WITH PORTAL!

Come to the dark side... screw cookies, WE HAVE CAKE!!!

When life gives you lemons, quote Cave Johnson!

Copy and paste this if you ever tried to bounce on blue paint, run super fast on orange paint, or wondered if you could portal onto white paint.

Copy and paste if you wish you had an Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.

Copy and paste if you dreamed about Aperture... then cried when you realized it was just a dream.

Copy and paste if you think GLaDOS is the most epic, awesome, PWNAGE AI EVER.

Copy and paste if one of your life goals includes:

-Hugging GLaDOS

-Testing in Aperture

-Meeting GLaDOS

-Meeting Wheatley

-SSPPPAAAACCCEEE!!!!

-Owning a turret