Dear friends,

The truth is I have recovered. But I often still have hallucinations. I get hallucinations around four or five times a week on a daily basis. But these are only minor.
I have reached the conclusion that this is as better as I will get. In my eyes, I see this as a one hundred percent recovery.

The truth is my depression stems from Anheondia, which is a lasting side-effect. Anhedonia is the term used to describe a lack of enjoyment in pleasurable daily activities. This is the cause of social withdrawment, and isolation as well as depression. My Anhedonia is reducing, I am making a recovery.But the fact is, I still enjoy socialising, it just becomes more difficult due to the Psychological factors including body language, facial expression. These things may cause one to become unapproachable. There were times where I thought I wasn't going to make it.

It is a side-effect of the illness, which comes with the Clinical depression. I am very highly motivated, however, my spirits are too low, thus that emotional pain turning into the constant ache in the chest. My spirits are too low to socialise and do anything. Without a social life, I become even more depressed. And it is at this time, I cling onto my friends. I love all of them...

I am lucky to have recovered, however, due to depression levels, the pain is up to the point where it is unbearable. To reduce pain levels, having someone say hello to me, it increases happiness levels, thus reducing pain levels. Every small "hello", every small smile counts. It lifts my spirits. Every piece of information learned counts.

I am getting better thanks to the support of all those around me.
I'm hoping to go on to help all those around me, all those in need. I'm very thankful to all of you...
I love meeting people, and every one I talk to, every smile I see, becomes a vertex.

Love,

Crystal | 茜茜 | ~