Name: Mithrandir is my true name, but I am fondly called "Gandalf" (westron tongue) by all my friends.

Age: Wouldn't you like to know.

Purpose on a world-wide-web internet site:

To give proper critique, as I truly should, given my destiny by the Valar to stand for everything just and true.

I stand by my dear friends Ronald and Jack. (Better known to common mortals as J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis)

Affiliations: This account is the direct counterpart to Pippin Baggins, rather known for writing the stories "Strange Things Happen In Libraries with Dr. Pepper", "The Mary-Sam Trilogy", and "I was King of Narnia". She is practically my goddaughter, or, at least she likes to THINK so.

I am also a member of the Istari Order (an Istari is better known as a 'wizard' in the common tongue, or westron.)

Leader of the Fellowship of the Ring, passed to Aragorn, son of Arathorn, King of Gondor, Knight of Minas Tirith, and Uniter of all Middle Earth, defeater of the Mouth of Sauron, and Strider the wandering ranger.

Mortal Enemys: Sauron, Dark Lord of all that is evil, the One Great Ring, the Mouth of Sauron, the King of the Goblin underworld, Saruman Whose-Staff-Was-Broken, Albus Dumbledore (teaching mere children the dark arts! Dead toads, cat tongues, vomit slugs, snake eyes, and rat teeth? It's hag magic, every bit of it! True magic isn't cackling spells and nearly headless ghosts, true magic is a special power granted by the Valar, peacekeepers and guardians under Illuvater, creator of all Middle Earth. And really! Did he get plastic surgery just so he could look like a wizard? Valar forbid, the man may be wise, but he is severely misuided.)

My first and foremost enemy is Flame's Rising. He appears like a bad tick at least once on any story worth reading. I am here to, hopefully, dissuade him from his harmful messages. We'll see. There are so many disadvantages to the internet--I cannot send magic through the cyberwaves, and I do not know where he lives otherwise I'd use my staff--and a little humility.

Place of residence: The other shore across the ocean, set forth from the Gray Havens, Middle Earth, the Fourth Age. I occasionally take up residence in a small cottage near Oxford, England. (During these times I blend in with the mortals).

Stance on the Issues: I know Merry and Pippin personally, and anyone who think they were attracted to eachother sexually is quite mistaken. They were as brothers, nothing more, nothing less. Oftentimes, people do not understand there is not alot of homosexuality in Middle Earth. There are a few Southerners scarred from events during the reign of the Great Eye and emerged from those times slightly gender confused, we rarely have any cases. Here are pairs that are complete fabrications: Aragorn/Legolas, Merry/Pippin, Frodo/Sam, Aragorn/Boromir, Legolas/Boromir, Gandalf/Aragorn (really now, dear folks?). All of these are total rubbish. And you can trust me because one of them, firstly, happens to be me, and secondly, I was there with these very accused.

The one ring is altogether evil, no one can weild it but the Lord of the rings himself. It would corrupt any who attempt to use it, no matter how pure of heart they are.

The union between Aragorn and Arwen is a breaking of a social normalacy, but there is nothing wrong with it. Many disagree that Elf and Human to be together, but I am a supporter.

Denethor was not posessed, misguided, or mad; he was corrupt. The thirst for power drove him to erase all dignity and respect for fellow peoples.

The proposition of democracy in the land of Lothlorien after Galadriel's departure is a fantastic idea. I may venture back for a visit to see how it is going. I hear rumors Haldir's wife will be running for Head of the Lothlorien Guard.

Friends: Bilbo, Frodo, Elrond, Aragorn, Legolas, Faramir, Galadriel, Celeborn, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Gimli, Eomer, Eowyn, Arwen, the Rangers, Fatty Bolger, Treebeard, Shadowfax...

Quotes: (note: These were compiled by Frodo, not myself)

"So who all who live to see such times but that is not for them to decide. All we have to do is decide what to do with the time that is given to us."

"It was pity that stayed Bilbo's hand."

"Gollum may have some part yet to play."

"Fool of a Took!"

"Fly you fools!"

"When it doubt, Meriadoc, always follow your nose."

"I am the Weilder of the Secret Fire. Flame of Adun!"

"This foe is beyond all of you."

"Keep it secret, keep it safe."

"Don't you leave him, Samwise Gamgee."

"Eavesdropping?"

"The coming of Merry and Pippin will be like the falling of small stones that begins an avalanche."

"Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger."

"Just tea, thank-you."

"Saruman, your staff is broken!"

"And what about very old friends?"

"I am Gandalf the White, now."

"By the first light of the third day, look to the East!"

Weapons of choice:

I have no weapons in my current state, but when residing in Middle Earth, a staff and sword are what accompanied me.

Places I've visited:

Too many to account for! Nevertheless, here are just a few: Hobbiton, the Gray Havens, Lothlorien, Rohan, Hollin, Emyn Muil, the Anduin, the Isen, the Misty Mountains, Dale, the Shadow Mountain, Beorn's home, Minas Tirith, Icthilien, Mordor, Minas Morgul, Mirkwood, Rivendell, Helm's Deep, Pelannor (alas! Too many!)

Likes/dislikes: I like tea, smoking my pipe, my dear friends, peaceful times, fireworks, reading, young children, hobbit lore, Rivendell, basic staff-usage training, libraries, giving advice when it is least wanted, frightening mischeivious hobbits.

I dislike jewelry, corrupt politicians, people calling me 'cranky' (what kind of language IS that?), war, violence, Nazgul, ponies, rude humans, the cutting and burning of trees, eavesdropping, snow, the stubborness of dwarves, coffee, playing with fire without the proper training, the undead/yet dead, the palantir, wizard-induced posession, silly and fruitless human flings.

Status: Reviewer, Defender of the Weak, Beta Reader, and Advice Giver. Authoritarian on all matters in the fandom fan fiction franchise.