I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe I am winning.

Sometimes when I close my eyes, I can't see.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

I hate it when people see me at the supermarket and they're like 'Hey, what are you doing here?' I tell them 'You know.. hunting elephants.'

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep - not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

1) I need to tell you a secret. go to 5

2) the answer is... go to 11

3) don't get angry. go to 15

4) calm down don't get frustrated. go to 13

5) first go to 2

6) don't be angry just go to 12

7) I just wanted to say hi

8) what I wanted to tell you is...is on 14

9) Be patient and go to 4

10) this is the last time I'm going to send you to a number. go to 7

11) I hope ur not annoyed when I say this...but go to 6

12) sorry out of order. go to 8

13) don't get mad just yet...go to 10

14) I don't know how to say this but... go to 3

15) You must be really bored so go to 9

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