Hello people! I am so glad you stopped by. Welcome to my profile. XD

Name: BD-chan here.

How I am: I am responsible, polite and a lazy smartass . I play the piano and I can sing.

Favorites: My favorite food is...well I guess anything with vegetables.I absolutely love tomatoes.I dont particulary like sweets but I adore chocolate.

My favorite couple is Sasuke&Sakura but I also like Naruto&Hinata, Shikamaru&Ino and Neji&Tenten, and Scorp&Rose from HP.

Likes: I love to read and write,to draw, to play basketball and to dance.
Dislikes: People who are trying to be someone they are not for the sake of others, those who think they are better than anybody else, cowards and snakes.

My thing: Naruto is my favorite anime ,but I also like Kaichou wa Maid-sama(Usui&Misaki), Vampire Knight(Kaname&Yuuki), Bleach and Lovely Complex.

Music: I listen to pop, rock and classical.

My stories: Humor/Romance is my type, stories inspired by how my friends and I are.

So yeah thats all you pretty much need to know about me.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT I: MY STORIES ARE CURRENTLY ON HOLD. I am sorry but I cant do anything about it. The main reason is, of course, school. I have tons of homeworks, projects, and so on and so forth. I also have extracurricular activities (eg:music, basketball) which keep me preoccupied. I will update at some point so dont worry. Thank you all.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT II: I need a beta, ASAP. For those who are interested please give me a PM. Thank you!

Ten Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter by Hyuuga Hiashi
written bu Shawny Wong

Rule One: If you come up to gates of the Hyuuga estate and announce your presence you’d better be delivering an important message from the Hokage, because you’re sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered practical for boys of your age to remove their shirts when they have been training for hours on end. Presumably, this is to ensure that you do not overheat while you are training outdoors. Please don’t take this as an insult but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. We do have air conditioned dojos and indoor training halls for a reason. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may remove your shirts and tops whenever and wherever you want, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that yourpants do not, accidentally, come off during any time spent with my daughter, I will take my senbon and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex with the wrong kunoichi can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, my daughter is that kunoichi, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about recent missions, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than sculpting the Hokage Monument. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like sweeping my floors?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, ninja patrols, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which feature chainsaws are okay. Chunin exam tournaments are okay. Morino Ibiki’s interrogation chambers are better. (Speaking of which, Ibiki owes me a favor. Would you like me to make an appointment for you? It’s no trouble.)

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. I am a master of the Byakugan – that makes me a living lie detector. I can see every involuntary twitch, every breath, and each bead of sweat on your face. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have an army of elite Byakugan users at my beck and call. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your steps coming up to my front gate for an enemy Cloud ninja sent here to steal the secrets of the Byakugan. You remember what happened to the last Cloud ninja who crossed me, don’t you? Incidentally, I will be cleaning and polishing the family katana as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you set one foot on my property you should submit yourself to a full body search by my guards, remove all hidden weapons from your person, and keep both hands in plain sight. Announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then leave - there is no need for you to come inside. You may not see me, but rest assured.I see you.

Check this out...I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile.

Try this!

Your One and Only Wish
Do it one by one, don't look ahead!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

If so, scroll down

(Don’t cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you

Love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are

Down.

3. If you’re initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to

Blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you

Fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but

The memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life

Changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your

Soul mate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time

But will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do

Anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!

Put this on your
page if you love
Naruto!

SASUSAKUCLUB you gotta Love this pairing to join.Just copy and paste to your profile and add your name:0Mori_Ita0,XSakuraHarunoX,3DG girl,Maybelle-And-Nightmare,Lady Maybelle of Confusion,Saya.The.Shuki, moonshine86, Zan_Top,The Blossom Duchess

THE WE HATE KARIN CLUB:If you hate Karin from NARUTO,copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list:Pink Cresent Moon,Miyako-hime,XSakuraHarunoX,I'm in love with a Uchiha23,Ebil Chameleon,CalwynN.D.Forever,Lady Maybelle of Confusion,Saya.The.Shuki., moonshine86, Zan_Top,The Blossom Duchess

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent that aren't, copy this, put it in you profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, Weasel Chick, Revenant666, dragonsroar, foxdude33, FallenLex, Soelle, Akihiro Asamoto, Corvin, Emo-GothFreak,Cheeseeatingsurrenderrat, silentscream16, 7sasukesprincess7, Hanajimaa, BrokenAngel363,Sayaka Uchiha,Hikari9397, Moonshine86, Zan_Top,The Blossom Duchess

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Drugs are bad news. Copy this into your profile.

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your profile.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this into your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! DO IT!

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree(or not), copy this and put it in your profile.

If you actually read through this entire thing, and sorted out the ones that fit you, copy/paste this on your profile.

If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile

If you have embarrasing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like animals, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like anime or manga, copy and paste this in your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this to your profile.

If you hate Karin from NARUTO, copy and paste these Karin bashings:

Karin is so fat, not even Naruto can believe it! Karin is so fat, not even the byakugan can see through her. Karin is so fat, she made fun of Chouji for being skin and bones. Karin is so fat, Tazuna considered using her as the bridge to the mainland. Karin is so fat, that when Lee was doing her, he gave up. Karin is so stupid, she couldn't find any of the "hidden" villages. Karin is so stupid, she took a shit thinking it would open the 8 inner gates. Karin is so old, Gai dropped his "Power of youth" philosophy on the spot. Karin is so ugly, ANBU thought she was in the second level of the curse mark, and kicked her butt. Karin is so ugly, even Sasuke couldn't ignore it. Karin is so ugly, Itachi felt like his eyesight was diminishing when he saw her. Karin is so ugly, it's forbidden just to transform into her .Karin is so ugly, Juugo's curse seal made him run for his life. Karin is so ugly, the Nine-tails fled in fear. Karin is so ugly, she made Jiraiya too scared to peek again when he saw her. Karin is so ugly, they made her join ANBU just so they can put a mask on her. Karin is so ugly, when she passed by Hinata, Hinata yelled 'dayummmmm!'

I think that Karin needs to die. Soon.

SasuSaku section!

If you love SasuSaku, then copy and paste this into your profile

WE LOVE SAKURA CLUB: IF YOU LOVE SAKURA FROM NARUTO, COPY AND PASTE THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE AND ADD YOUR NAME TO THE LIST: XxMadara's-Little-StalkerxX, Kashira358, bloodroseinthetwilight, CherryBlossomSavior, animefan831, candyluver, Naruto-fan-Okami-chan, annee loves sasusaku, Chii Saino Kuratsu

PROOF! That Sasuke cares... for Sakura. Got this from Cherryblossom-has-bloomed777

During the bell test, when Sakura fainted from seeing his head above ground, and the rest below, Sasuke waited for her to wake up, even though he probably knows he's wasting time.

-When they were escorted Tazuna to the Wave Country, Sasuke rushed in front of Sakura to protect her and Tazuna, even though Kakashi would have come(of course, he didn't know that but still)

-(From Angel of Cherry Blossoms) When Sasuke and Naruto were fighting Haku, Zabuza went to attack Tazuna but Kakashi protected him and Sakura screamed. When she did, you could hear worry in Sasuke's voice when they heard her.

-During the Chuunin Exams, The Forest of Death, when Sasuke and Sakura first found, Orochimaru, disguised as a Grass nin, when he stabbed his leg to get rid of the whole frozen in fear thing, when he went to pick up Sakura, he could have done it many ways, but he chose to pick her up bridal style.

-Again during the Chunnin Exams, The Forest of Death, when Sasuke and Naruto were fighting Orochimaru, disguised as a grass nin, after Orochimaru gave Naruto the five-pronged seal. When Sakura called him a coward, he reacted. He didn't react when Naruto called him a coward.

-After Orochimaru gave Sasuke the Cursed Seal, Sakura went to help him. I'm not sure if this is just because he was in a lot of pain, but instead of dealing with the pain by himself, like I thought he would, he actually let Sakura help him and the animators made him faint onto her.

-Also during the Chuunin Exams, The Forest of Death, when Sasuke wakes up, the first thing he does is ask Sakura who hurt her. Even the the influence of the Curse Seal couldn't change the bond he has with her.

-Another in The Forest of Death, when Sakura hugged him, the Curse Seal receeded. There's gotta be something behind that.

-During the Perliminary Rounds of the Chuunin Exams, the first thing Sasuke thought of when he was trying to make his curse mark receed was the image of Sakura crying, begging him to stop.

-After Garra semi-changed into his Shukaku form, and after he pinned Sakura to the tree with his sand hand, Sasuke told Naruto that he had better save Sakura no matter what, then run away.

-Also during this time, Sasuke also said that he wouldn't allow another important friend to die in front of him, refering to Sakura.

-Again during this time, when Sasuke went to catch Sakura after the sand released her, there were many ways of catching her, but he had to catch her bridal style. I know that's the way she fell, but then, who made her fall that way. The people who make Naruto. I say, they're hinting something but making Sakura fall in that manner.

-Once again, after Sasuke caught Sakura and went to lay her down on a branch, if you look closly, you will noticed his hand lingers under her head for a split second.

-Do I have to say it, when Sasuke told Pakkun to take care of Sakura, you could hear worry in his voice. His eyes also softened a bit.

-After the Hokage's funeral, in the flashback when Sakura asked Sasuke if he saved her, he said that Naruto saved her. You can tell that he had regret and sadness in his voice. Like he wanted to save her.

-When they were escorting Idate through the race, while on the boat when the Rain nin were attacking, Sakura's arm was hit by a kunai. Even though it was only a small cut, when she cried out in pain, Sasuke showed a hint of worry on his face.

-(From Angel of Cherry Blossoms a.k.a. Angel of Konoha)When Ino hugged in during the Chuunin Exams, Sasuke was very mad and pissed off. But when Sakura hugged him in the hospital, he didn't have any hatred in his eyes and he let her.

-During Naruto and Sasuke's fight on the hospital roof, when Sakura ran in the way to try and stop them, Sasuke wanted to pull back. It means he cares for her well being in some way; or else, he would have just ran her through.

-This one I thought was implied. Who confronted Sasuke the night he left? Sakura. The people that make Naruto might be hinting something.

-Again, when Sasuke was leaving, he put up with all of Sakura's talking instead of ignoring her like he normally does. He even gave her a speech. A short one, but still.

-(Angel of Konoha) When Sakura asked to go with Sasuke, he replied that it was "too dangerous." He didn't want her to get killed.

-Also when Sasuke was leaving, before he knocked her out, he said "Thank you." This shows that he does care about her in some way, I think.

-(From Angel of Cherry Blossoms)Sasuke knows that Sakura is weaker than Naruto, yet he doesn't call her 'weak' or 'idiot'. Just 'annoying'.

-Lastly, when Sasuke knocked her out, he could have left her on the ground where she lay

Only for up to date manga readers... (From SaKuRa- DrEaMiNg Of YoU)

-Very subtle hint that may just be my opinion. When Sasuke blows up the hallway and he's looking down in the hole at Sai, Sakura is the first one to see the new Sasuke. She's the one he last saw when he left Konoha(left the city, not during the Find Sasuke Arc) and she's the first one he sees out of Team 7.

-When Naruto, Sakura, Sai and Yamato go to find Sasuke, and after they do. It was after Sasuke talked with the Kyuubi. He said that he didn't want to use any of his more cruder methods. Of course, Orochimaru stopped him, but that shows that even after two and a half years, he still cares, even if it's just a little. He still has "bonds."

-When Naruto, Sakura, Sai and Yamato met up with Sasuke, the only one to come out from that meeting physically unharmed was Sakura.

-Some say that Karin, in Team Hebi, has hot pink hair. That is possible, cause if the pink is darker, i think manga-drawers would actually make them black...well, you can't make them grey, like between light pink and brown or red. But back to the topic. If Karin did have pink hair then maybe Sasuke picked her because she reminded him of Sakura. The pink hair and the specialty with chakra.

Movies

-In the first Naruto movie, at the end when the Snow Country became the Spring Country, when all the snow melted, you could see Sakura and Sasuke. Sasuke had his head resting on Sakura's lap and he didn't mind.

-All throughout the movie, Sasuke and Sakura were always working together.

SASUSAKU MOMENTS!! (vol 1-21)

1. Holding hands: 2 times

-Lee's first appearance, Sakura pulls on Sasuke and Naruto's hands so they would come along (vol4)

-When Sasuke get's his curse and is suffering (vol 6)

-When Sasuke tells Sakura to stop worrying about him (vol 9)

2. Catching/Carrying: 4 times

-Sasuke is fighting with Lee and when he falls, guess who catches him (vol 5)

-To escape from Orochimaru Sasuke stabs himself to get rid of fear, in the Anime there is a wonderful shot where he carries Sakura to safety. (vol 6)

-The sand that pinned Sakura to a tree is slowly crumbling away, Sasuke catches her just in time! (vol 16)

-Sakura is in an awfully strange position on that bench, he must have carried here there!! (episode 181, vol 20 or 21)

3. Sakura hugging Sasuke: 5 times

-First volume, Kakashi is testing them and "Sasuke kun you're alive!) (vol 1)

-Sasuke wakes up on the bridge at the Haku incident and... AWWW!! (vol4)

-Sasuke is suffering from his curse, Sakura is there by him...u(vol6)

-THE HUG!! to stop Sasuke from going crazy (vol7)

-In the hospital! God that was a great scene... (Sasuke kun...!) Kishimoto sensei I love you! (vol 21)

4. Responses from Sasuke (thanks to Mileena):

-When Sakura is depressed and Sasuke tries to cheer her up by saying she knows the most about genjutsu in their group. Then he starts fighting the guy who has a crush on her, hmmmm... suspicious (vol4)

-The beautiful quote "Sakura... Who did that to you..." Omg that was a great scene! (vol 7)

-Sasuke tells Sakura, Naruto saved her, and she smiles, and whoa here we go I see a little jealousy there! Especially since you flung the apples onto the floor. (vol 20)

Sakura: Do I ever cross your mind?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Do you like me?
Sasuke: Not really
Sakura: Do you want me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you cry if I left?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you live for me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you do anything for me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Choose--me or your life?
Sasuke: My life
Sakura runs away in shock and pain and Sasuke runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life

If you think Sakura and Sasuke are meant for each other, copy this onto your profile.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

Repost this if you truly believe in God.

Pick the ones that fit you (bold&italic for me)

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I'm FAT so I MUST smuggle chips into my classes.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.

I have EMO FRIENDS so I MUST be emo as well.

I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.

I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.

I'm a BRUNETTE WITH BLOND HIGHLIGHTS so I MUST be a wanna-be.

I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed.

I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.

I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.

I'm a LESBIAN, so I must have a sex-tape.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terriost.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.

I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.

I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.

I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.

I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.

I'm LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.

I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.

I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convienance store.

I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.

I'm a DANCER, so I MUST be stupid and stuck-up.

I wear SKIRTS, so I MUST be a slut.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.

I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.

I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.

I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.

I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.

I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.

I'm ITALIAN, so I MUST have a big dick.

I'm EGYPTIAN, so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.

I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I DRESS IN UNSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER AND ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.

I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be gay.

I have BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.

I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.

I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.

I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that's how Russians roll.

I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.

I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be gay too.

I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a big butt.

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.

I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.

I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.

I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.

I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.

I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I MUST be violent.

I'm a FEMALE VIDEO GAMER, so I MUST be ugly...or crazy.

I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.

I'm BI so I MUST think every girl I see is hot.

I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.

I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be a nerd that does homework 24/7.

I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.

I'm MIXED so I MUST be fucked up.

I'm AMERICAN so I MUST be plotting to take over the world.

I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.

I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm in a BAND, so I MUST be a dork.

I'm BLACK so I MUST believe Jesus Wuz A Brotha.

I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect.

I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.

I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.

I love SHOPPING, so I MUST be rich.

I hate SHOPPING so I MUST be a freak.

I'm an OG so I MUST be mexican.

I like ROCK MUSIC so I MUST be a druggie.

I play CHESS so I MUST be a nerd.

I have a LOT OF FRIENDS so I MUST be bribing them with sex.

I have a FEW FRIENDS so I MUST be a freak.

I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I listen to COUNTRY music, so I MUST be a horse-loving hick.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I wear LOW-CUT TOPS, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I like to CURSE, so I MUST have problems at home.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist.
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.

If you hate stereotypes and think people should just SHUT UP AND STOP, POST THIS!

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".

5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".

7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.

9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.

10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.

16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"

18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity .

Send This In An E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile!

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "go, pikachu, go!"

17. Challenge people to duels in the back aisles with wrapping paper tubes.

18. Have a conversation with yourself loud enough so that people in the other aisles can hear you.

19. Throw things over one aisle into another one.

20. Mark out price tags with a sharpie.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs.

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we fucked up … but that shit was fun!”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

REAL FRIENDS: Won't tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when you're not down anymore.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Try to half-ass comfort you when you feel down.

REAL FRIENDS: Grab you by the shoulders, shake you, and say "Bitch, snap out of it!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your shit so long they forget its yours.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Always keep your stuff they borrowed in perfect condition.

REAL FRIENDS: Lose your shit and tell you, "My bad ... here's a tissue."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink because they think it's polite.

REAL FRIENDS: Raise an eyebrow and say "Bitch, I'll eat what I want" and are the reason you never have food.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Can write a very embarrassing book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Ask if you're alright.

REAL FRIENDS: Run away screaming: "GET OUT OF THE WAY! SHE'S PISSED!!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Ask you what you number is.

REAL FRIENDS: Remind you what you number is when you forget.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Are for awhile.

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Have to be reminded not to tell.

REAL FRIENDS: Would willingly go skinny-dipping in a tank of acid before they even consider telling.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough.

REAL FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say “Bitch, drink the rest of that, you know we don’t waste.”

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will offer to pay when you have a drink.

REAL FRIENDS: Will laugh and say "Pay my ass! You'll pay for mine, bitch!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Don't let friends drive drunk.

REAL FRIENDS: Don't let friends drive drunk alone.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will apologize when you forget lunch money and say that they don't have any left.

REAL FRIENDS: Will say "Sucks for you" and finally cave after a few hours and then say "You owe me for this, you fatass."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will smile and say "Don't worry about me" when they forget their lunch money, even if you didn't offer to pay.

REAL FRIENDS: Will say "Bitch, I'm a fatass and I'm starving, now buy me some damn food."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will automatically tell you you're beautiful when you ask if something makes you look fat.

REAL FRIENDS: Will say "Well no shit, sherlock."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Would tell you not to get a face-lift because you already look perfect.

REAL FRIENDS: Would say "Face-lift? I don't think a fork-lift would help."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Tell you your zits aren't noticeable.

REAL FRIENDS: Say "Damn, girl! That thing is HUGE!!"

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Laugh with you.

REAL FRIENDS: Laugh at you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Laugh at all your jokes.

REAL FRIENDS: Tell you your jokes suck.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Congratulate you when you get good grades.

REAL FRIENDS: Say "Jeez, you nerd. If you were in stupid classes like me, we'd see each other more."

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Encourage you not to skip school.

REAL FRIENDS: Photoshop one of their old doctor's notes and use it to spring you from school.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Will knock them the fuck out!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will glare at the guy who dumps you and say "Forget him. You're too good for him."

REAL FRIENDS: Kick the guy's ass and threaten to castrate him with a spork if he comes within five miles of you.

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Crush on your older brother whom you absolutely despise.

REAL FRIENDS: Hate your older brother as much as you do and give him the nick-name "Faggot".

FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will ignore this.

REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it.

Teen Commandments

1. You shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(why wait that long)

2. You shall not do drugs.
(alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)

3. You shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Wal-Mart has a bigger selection)

4. You shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)

5. You shall not steal from your parents.
(everyone knows grandma has more money)

6. You shall not get into fights.
(Cat fight anyhow...just start them.)

7. You shall not skip class.
(just take the whole day off)

8. You shall not wear revealing clothes in class.
(Hooters pays more)

9. You shall not think about having sex.
(like Nike says, "just do it")

10. You shall not help old ladies across the street.
(just leave 'em in the middle)

Pickup Lines That Are Doomed To Fail...

1. You look familiar; have I seen you before? Oh yeah, I remember! You look like my next girlfriend!

2. Hey baby, I'm like a rubix cube. The longer you play with me, the harder I get.

3. If I bit my lip, would you kiss it better?

4. Do you have a map? I got lost in your eyes...

5. If I said you have a nice body, would you hold it against me?

6. You be an iceberg, I'll be the Titanic, and I'll go down on you.

7. If I tossed this 50 cent coin, what are the chances of me getting head?

8. I'll be the flower, you be the bee, and you can have a taste of my honey!

9. Are you an alien? Cause you've just abducted my heart.

10. Can I take your picture? I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Christmas.

11. Your beauty was so distracting that I ran into a wall, so I'm gonna need your name and number...for insurance reasons.

12. Excuse me, I lost my number. Can I have yours?

13. If being pretty is a crime, then you are guilty as charged.

14. Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out!

15. Are you free tonight or is it gonna cost me?

16. Is it hot in here, or is it just you?

17. Are you an overdue book? 'Cause you've got FINE written all over you.

18. Do you have a mirror in your pocket? 'Cause I can see myself in your pants.

19. Did you fart? 'Cause you blew me away!

20. I know I'm no Fred Flinstone, but I can make your bed-rock.

21. The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.

22. What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.

23. That shirt’s very becoming of you. If I were on you, I’d be coming too

24. Nice dress; but it would look better on my floor.

25. Did they just take you out of the oven? Because you’re hot!

26. If you were a new hamburger at McDonald's, you would be McGorgeous.

27. Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams.

28. Do you have any raisins? No? Well, then how about a date?

29. Can I interview you? I'm writing an atricle on the finer things in life.

30. Can you help me settle a bet? My friends say angels don't exist...

31. Is there a ninja in your pants? 'Cause your butt is kicking!

32. What's that say on your neck? 'Made in Heaven'.

GIRLS DON'T REALIZE THESE THINGS

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'

I do not own this.

FUNNY THINGS TO DO IN AN ELEVATOR

MUST READ!!

When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.

Say "Ding" on every floor.

Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.

Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.

Call the Psychic Hot line from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor your on.

Hold the doors open and say your waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close, and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"

Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.

Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on, ask if they have an apointment.

Lay down the twister mat and ask people if they would like to play.

Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking.

Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.

Ask, "Did you feel that?"

Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.

When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay, don't panic, they open again!"

Swat at flies that don't exist.

Tell people that you can see their aura.

Call out, "Group Hug!"and then enforce it.

Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you, just shut up!"

Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"

Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.

Listen to the elevator walls with your stethoscope.

Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.

Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on".

Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is MY personal space!"

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

Would you do this?

Girl: Slow down!

Guy: No this is fun!

Girl: No it's not! Please, it's way to scary!

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you. Now slow down.

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gave him a big hug.

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself? It's bothering me.

In the newspaper, the next day, a motorcycle crashed into a building because of break failure.

Two people were on it and only one survived.

The truth was, that half way down the road the guy realized his breaks were out and he didn't want the girl to know.

Instead, he had her hug him and tell him she loved him one last time. Then he had her put his helmet on so she would live even if it meant he would die.

If you would do the same for the person you love, copy and paste this into your profile.

Did You Know..

Kissing is healthy. (:o Didn't expect that,now I understand why my bf wants to kiss every straigh male, maybe even some gay ones.. )

Bananas are good for period pain. (The hell? This one is actually very true.)

It's good to cry. (Totally agree but not in front of others, it would be embarassing.)

Chicken soup actually makes you feel better. (Yummy)

94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers. (:)) I will do that when I get a boyfriend..but with my luck I will probably get one of those 6%)

Lying is actually unhealthy. (Oh crap!! Someone get me a doctor!!...Just kidding)

You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.

It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you. (Damn, a lot of guys like me then...anyway thats one stupid but true thing. I personally do not get it. You want a person to like you, not hate you.Why do you insult the person you like? Is your mind on the other side?)

89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move. (I already knew that we got the pants in a relashionship.)

It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed. (Then I must be weird cause I can.)

Chocolate will make you feel better. (Amen to that!!)

Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.

A good friend never judges. (Eh, that depends mostly on what is being judged)

A good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any... (no comment )

Boys aren't worth your tears. (Marlon Brando sure is.)

We all love surprises. (Nope. My 80 years old neighbour doesnt. He almost died of heart attack last time I yelled ”SURPRISE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY”)

Wow, kissing is healthy? Dad!!! Quit smoking and kiss mom. You will get 10 years younger. LoL ;)

These are The 12 Signs of Falling In Love

12. You'll read his/her IMs over and over again...

11. You'll walk really really slow while you're with him/her...

10. You'll feel shy whenever you're with him/her...

9. While thinking bout him/her...your heart will beat
faster and faster...

8. By listening to his/her voice...you'll smile for no reason.

7. While looking at him/her..you cant see the other
people around you...you can only see that person...

6. You'll start listening to SLOW songs.

5. He/She becomes all you think about.

4. You'll get high just by their smell...

3. You'll realize that you're always smiling to yourself
when you think about them..

2. You'll do anything for him/her...

1. While reading this, there was one person on your mind the whole time.
Now make a wish :

post this as "these are the 12 signs of falling in love"
and something good will happen to you tonight.

... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .sSS... ... ..sS... ... ... ... ... ... ... . If you're a girl and you've ever
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... sSSS? ... ... .s..sS ... ... ... ... ... . beaten a guy in an arm wrestle,
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ..sSSS. ... .sS.. sSS.. ... ... ... ... ... ... . copy the Flaming Heart
... ... ... ... ... ... ..sSSSS.. ... .sS.. .SS . ... ... ... ... ... ... ... into your profile!
... ... ... ... ... ... . SSSSS... ... ... sS... S.. ... ... ... ... ... ... . (sorry guys, girls only)
... ... ... ... S. ... .SSSSSSs ... ... .sS... ,
... ... ... ...sS. ... SSSSSSSs. ... .SSS.. ... .
... ... ... ... SS ... .SSSSSSs.. ... SSs ,
... ... ... ...S. ... .SSSSSSSs .sSSS.. ... ..
... ... ... ... SS... ... SSSSS..SSSS... s
... ... ... ... SSs ... ...SSSSSSSSS ... sS
... ... ... ... .SSs... ... ..SSSSSsSSSS ... sSS
... ... ... ..s...SSSS ... ..sSSSSSSSS. ..s SS
... ... ... .SS.. sSSSS..sSSSSSSSSSSSSS S
... ... ... sS.sSSSSsSSSSSSSSSSSSSS S
... ... ... .sSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
... ... ...sSSSssssSSSSSSSSSSsssssssSSS
... ... SSssSSSSsSS
... ...sSs
... ..s... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ..
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ..

YOUR GUY SIDE:

You love hoodies.

You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth (it happened. But usually I dont.)
Sleep with your socks on at night

Total: 15

Your Girl Side:

You wear lip gloss/chapstick.
You love to shop.
You wear eyeliner. (on special occasions)
You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheerleading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
You care about what you look like.

You like wearing dresses when you can.

You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the joy/joke of it.
Like being the star of every thing.

Total: 16

At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
it all over his lap.

When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by
jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.

When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion.
You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.

When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
thanked him by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
him by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
how deeply he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the
country.

When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You
thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their
children.

And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, post this on your profile.

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, when I grew up I was BLACK, when I'm sick I'm BLACK, when I go in the sun I'm BLACK, when I'm cold I'm BLACK, when I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, when you're born you're PINK, when you grow up you're WHITE, when you're sick, you're GREEN, when you go in the sun you turn RED, when you're cold you turn BLUE, and when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

Female come backs

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes are amazing.
Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

If you repost this you will get a phone call 37 minutes after you repost
this...
If you don't resend this then your love life will be doomed for eternity.

GIRLS REPOST THIS AS "female comebacks".

What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:

When she walks away from you mad
Follow her

When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you
Grab her and don't let go

When she starts cussing at you
Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet
Ask her whats wrong

When she ignores you
Give her your attention

When she pulls away
Pull her back

When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word

When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared
Protect her

When she lays her head on your shoulder
Tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steals your favorite hat
Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you
she really does more than you could understand

When she grabs at your hands
Hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you
bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret
keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes
don't look away until she does

When she misses you
she's hurting inside

When you break her heart
the pain never really goes away

When she says its over
she still wants you to be hers

When she repost this bulletin
she wants you to read it -

Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.-

When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 years later she'll remember you-

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her-

Treat her like she's all that matters to you.-

Tease her and let her tease you back.-

Stay up all night with her when she's sick.-

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.-

Give her the world.-

Let her wear your clothes.-

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.-

Let her know she's important.-

Kiss her in the pouring rain.-

When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is;
"Who's butt am I kicking?"

If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will :
Call you.
Kiss you.
Love you.
Text you.

And if you wish that someday you will find the one who treats you like this repost...

--I AM THE GIRL--

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped, to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her (yet it would be nice) and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.:HarryArtemis1220, edwardcullenissosexy, Pixel Alice, ME LOVEY JAZZY, Gandalf the Grey-Edelwiess, DoYouReallySeeMe, Potter's Angels,LoopyLooneyCharny, Thivyabanu, MollieBabiie, The Blossom Duchess

SAVE THE ONLINE MANGA READING! STOP THE MADNESS -- The petition to save online manga, help the cause!!

Pein/Pain - Nagato

[ ] -I have a piercing/s.

[ ] - My natural hair colour is red, ginger or auburn.

] -My eyes are grey/gray.

[X] -My closest friend is a girl.

[X] - I'm a very secretive person.

[X] - I like it when it rains.

[Pein/Pain - Nagato Score: 3]

Konan

[ ] - Most of my friends are guys.

[X] - Origami RULES!

[ ] - I know how to make atleast over 5 different origami objects.

[X] - I love flowers!

] - My closest friend is a guy.

[X] - I don't like having my photo taken.

[ ] - I don't like water. Swimming etc.

[Konan Score: 3]

Itachi Uchiha

[ ] - My younger sibling/s bothers hate me a lot.

[X] -Many people find me attractive.

[X] - I'm quiet and very mature for my age.

[X] - I don't actually like fighting though I can fight.

[X] - I don't care what you think, Kisame is cool.

[X] - I'm the top of my class. Intelligence.

[ ] - My natural hair colour is black.

[Itachi Uchiha Score: 5 ]

Kisame Hoshigaki

[X] - Sharks are AWESOME! (when they dont eat you)

[ ] - I like gore

[ ] - I dislike my own appearance.

[X] - Underwater in the ocean is a beautiful scenery.

[X] - Once someone gets to know me, I'm a pretty nice person.

[ ] - I'm the tallest of my friends who are the same gender. (Almost the tallest)

[X] - I like water sports.

[Kisame Hoshigaki Score: 4]

Sasori

[ ] - I look young for my age.

[X] - Puppets are fascinating...

[ ] - I'm very impatient.

[ ] - I hate that bitch, Sakura Haruno.

[ ] - My Grandma annoys me.

[ ] - I'm the smallest of my friends.

[X] - Loud noises/people annoy me.

[Sasori Score: 2]

Deidara

[X] - I'm an artist.

[X] - I like and appreciate art.

[X] - My natural hair colour is blonde/dark blonde.

[ ] - I have blue eyes.

[ ] - I'm the youngest in my group of friends.

[ ] - I hate Tobi.

[X] - I have a friend who hangs around and annoys me.

[Deidara Score: 4]

Kakuzu

[X] - I'm a saver, not a spender.

[X] - My eyes are either green or hazel.

[ ] - I have had stitches.

[ ] - I hate Hidan.

[ ] - Younger people tend to tick me off.

[ ] - I am the oldest in my group of friends.

[X] - My skin is dark or tanned. (tanned ;p)

[Kakuzu Score: 3]

Hidan

[ ] - I have a cussing/swearing problem.

[ ] - I hate Kakuzu.

[ ] - I hate so many people and hate them so much, that I probably have my own hit-list.

[X] - I am religious.

[X] - I am very strong-willed.

[ ] - I have cut myself on purpose before.

[ ] - I'm very prone to accidents.

[Hidan Score: 2]

Zetsu

[X] - I have a split personality. Two sides.

[X] - Nature is AWESOME!

[ ] - I'm usually alone.

[X] - I don't mind the company of others.

[ ] - I don't have many friends.

[X] - Tobi is not that bad.

[ ]- I WON'T eat the veggies! Meat all the way, man!

[Zetsu Score: 4]

Tobi

[ ] - I'm always hyperactive.

[X] - I have a particular person who I like to pester.

[ ] - People often mistake me for someone else or say I look like someone.

[X] - I LOVE the colour orange.

[X] - I'm rarely sad and always optimistic.

[X] - TOBI IS A GOOD BOY! XD

[Tobi Score: 4]

Orochimaru

[ ] - I'm attracted to younger people.

[ ] - I have a very pale skin colour.

[ ] - Snakes are AWESOME!

[X] - I love/like Sasuke Uchiha.

[X] - Michael Jackson is AWESOME!

[X] - I'm very motivated, nothing will stop me from reaching my goals.

] - People think I'm twisted or insane.

[Orochimaru Score: 3]

So Im Itachi and Tobi XD. Yey! I love them.

From StarLit :)

Six reasons not to mess with children:

Reason 1:

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".

Reason 2:

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

Reason 3:

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

Reason 4:

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."

Reason 5:

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.

Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."

"Yes," the class said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."

Reason 6:

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.

At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.

The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

-From Little Tenyo

I was walking around in a store. I saw a cashier hand this little boy his money back saying "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for 5 minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me." "I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "What if we checked again, just in case you do have enough money?'' "OK" he said "I hope that I have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added "I asked yesterday before I slept for God to make sure I have enough money to buy this doll so that mommy can give it to my sister. He heard me!''"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady came again and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article: 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car, where there was one young lady and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to recover from the coma. Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young lady had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever. The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices:

1) Repost this message.

2) Ignore it as if it never touched you. have a heart.

Women are made from the ribs of men

not from his head to top him

or from his feer to be stepped upon

But from his side to be close to him

Beneath his arm to be protected by him

near his heart to be loved by him

(Anonymous)