Well, this is me, and the following stories that may eventually appear here are my pitiful attempts to entertain you.

I'm English and vaguely proud, but only because I have an awesome accent and the ability to sound posh even though I'm of the salt of the earth variety.
I'm a girl, and as far as you know my name is Gummel, and that's all you ever shall know. Bwahahahaha etc.