![]() Author has written 3 stories for Maximum Ride, and Twilight. hEy! im Skylr! (My sister heidi also sometimes adds on this account the story wolf children is hers) "You laugh at me because I'm different, I laugh at you because I just pushed you down stairs for calling me different!" important disclaimer: Whatever it is -- I swear I didn't do it little bits bout me: Im a girl I live in america I Go to a school I read books I run TRACK and CROSS COUNTRY I play Soccer I smile a lot(: My favorite band is Forever the Sickest Kids(: favorite song is She's a Lady by Forever the Sickest Kids I'm blonde I ran 45 miles in the past 7 days I have no life Lmao I have to wear a special bracelet to be able to focus Surprisingly I do not have A.D.D These are the pics i was talking about in my story Wolf Children: Picture of the twins: (Ali is in White, Zee is in purple) HIlarious Quotes Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz "Fragile. Do not drop."(oppsie...) i called you boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse i never apologise, im sorry but that's just the way i am There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles." Who are you and how did you get in here? Frank: I'm a locksmith. And... I'm a locksmith... What you call dog with no legs? "Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss." - Douglas Adams 'When life gives you lemons, make apple juice and laugh as everyone tries to figure out why the hell you did it' - Allyn Night Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling. don't follow in my footsteps i tend to walk into walls Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery. Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid. Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from. He who laughs last didn't get it Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like solitary confinement. You know the speed of light;so what is the speed of dark ? I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants. I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them. When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car. Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal. I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer. I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday. You can't spell awesome without ME! People can be divided into three groups. Those who make things happen. Those who watch things happen. Those who wonder what happened. Congratulations on being the captain of the third group. Some people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. Straight is something crooked that was bent. Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world. I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away. Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence. Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed. I'm not a complete idiot. Some parts are missing. The voices in my head tell me that you're all crazy to think that I need therapy. If you can keep your head while other people are losing theirs, you probably don't fully understand the situation. i love you is spelt with eight letters, but so is bullshit best friend - spelt with ten letters, but so is lying bitch I always wait for the Times each morning. I look at the obituary column and if I’m not in it, I go to work. A Minneapolis company has come out with a credit card size shotgun that fits in your wallet. The inventor says he invented it to give people a sense of security. Oh yeah, what makes you feel more secure than sitting on shotgun? Now how does this work? What's the first thing a thief steals? Your wallet, oh, now he's got your gun too! I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I only lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a window. The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. my imaginary friends think you have problems Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance? everyone's entitled to be stupid but your just abusing the privilege it takes 42 muscles to frown at the person who is annoying you but only 4 to reach out and bitch slap them You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try' Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. What do you mean, my birth certificate expired? percussive maintenance - the art of whacking the crap of an electronic device to make it work again 'If you are first you are first. If you are second you are not in first.' I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty I'm a Bitch but I am a proud Bitch(: Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods.. On Sears hairdryer: On a bag of Fritos: On a bar of Dial soap: On some Swann frozen dinners: On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: On packaging for a Rowenta iron: On Boot's Children's cough medicine: On Nytol sleep aid: On a Korean kitchen knife: On a string of Christmas lights: On a food processor: On Sainsbury's peanuts: On an American Airlines packet of nuts: On a Swedish chainsaw: On a child's Superman costume: MR quotes "South America. It'll be warm. They have llamas. You like llamas." -Max-MAX "I feel like pudding, Pudding with nerve endings. Pudding in great pain." -Iggy-AE "I vill now destroy de Snickuhs bahs!" -Gazzy-STWAOES "Have you guys been playing in the toxic waste again? Been bitten by a radioactive spider? Struck by lightning? Drink a super-soldier serum?" -Fang-FW "Your middle name is 'Charging Off.'" -Total-MAX "The answer..." White is the colour of little bunnies with pink noses. White is the colour of fluffy clouds fluffing their way across the sky. White is the colour of soft serve ice cream in a cone. White is the colour of angels wings and Angel's wings. White is the colour of brand new ankle socks fresh out of the bag. White is the colour of crisp sheets in schmancy hotels White is the colour of every last freaking gol-danged thing you see for endless miles and MILES if you happen to be in Antarctica trying to save the world, which now you aren't so sure you can do because you feel like if you see any more whiteness- Wonder Bread, someone's underwear, teeth, you will completely and totally lose your ever-lovin' mind and wind up pushing a grocery cart full of empty cans around New York City, muttering to yourself. -Maximum Ride "Holy (insert swear word of your choice here.)"-Fang "I look like prep school Barbie. Actually, you look like prep school Barbie. I'm just one of her friends." -Nudge Jeb turned to her. "She's incorruptible." Bully for me. "At least by power." I said. "You haven't tried chocolate or cute shoes" ~Max and Jeb “Now, let’s say they come and get us.” –Max MAXIMUM RIDE FAN QUESTIONS: 1. Do you think Iggy is hot? UMM derrr 2. Did you cry when Ari died? no but i felt so bad 4 him after his dad like ignoring him and stuff 3. Do you think Fang is hot? YES!! 4. How do you pronounce Ari's name? Air-ee is how i pronounce it 5. Do you laugh every time you read the name Mr. Chu? yes lol its like i want to say hey whats up chewwy 6. -SPOILER ALERT- In MAX, did you laugh hysterically when Total started talking about marriage? Um yeah like dogg geting married omg 7. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you squeal at all the faxness in MAX? EHMAGAWD yes! 8. Did you angrily throw your book across the room when the flock split up? No i would of lost my page 9. Who is your favorite character? MAx shes so awesome 10. Do you like Jeb? No he is a retard 11. -SPOILER ALERT- Were you making a genuine "WTF" face when Max and Fang grew gills? More like "oh typical" face 12. Did you think MAX was better than TFW? yeah less obsessive with global warming 13. -SPOILER ALERT- Did you get slightly fed up with Nudge and Angel's slight attitudes in MAX? Yeah um angel was annoying me nudge not so much 14. Which book is your all time favorite? TAE, STWAOES,SOF,M,FW 15. If the flock had a theme song, what would it be? The Great Escape by Boys Like Girls 16. Have you ever imagined the flock as a band playing whatever song comes up when listening to your iPod? Umm no... 17. Who do you think the voice should be? FANG! lol no i jk lol idk who 18. Do you think one or more members of the flock should learn to play an instrument? naaaaa 19. What bugged you the most about TFW? Global Warming coming up in every sentence and the legnth 20. MIGGY or FAX? FAX What if What if you found the one thing you hoped for What if it was taken away What if you got the one thing you worked and dreamt for What if your dreams were shattered What if you found the guy of your dreams What if he turns out to be a horrible man What if your life is going great What if your life takes a turn for the worse What if you find you get along with everyone What if everyone secretly hates you What if you had all the answers What if all you knew was a lie What if you had everything but What if you had nothing~by me (written when i was sad about getting my dreams crushed) think about it you know you think it has meaning im not gonna explan the meaning it has for me but find your own meaning in it. ;) YOUR REAL NAME: Skyler 2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Skyizzle 3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal): Blue elephant 4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name and a fancy name): Leigh Bellwood 6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink): black gatorade 7. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maidenname, 3rd letter of you dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name): Keiggea (umm okk) 8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name): Patricia 9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets): Black Ginger If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile. If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile! If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile If you have ever wanted an inanimate object to go die copy and paste this into your profile If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile. If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile If you have ever wanted to yell at a chararter in a book for being so very stupid copy this into your profile If you have ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head on a table for no reason copy and paste this onto your profile If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile. 98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile. If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile If you wish your boyfriend would say he loved you copy this to your profile Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile. If you have ever crashed into a wall while you were sugar high, copy onto profile. If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile A True Boyfriend: When she walks away from you mad: Follow her When she stares at your mouth: Kiss her When she pushes you or hits you: Grab her and don't let go When she start's cussing at you: Kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet: Ask her whats wrong When she ignores you: Give her your attention When she pull's away: Pull her back When you see her start crying: Just hold her and don't say a word When you see her walking: Sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared: Protect her When she lays her head on your shoulder: Tilt her head up and kiss her When she steal's your favorite hat: Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night When she teases you: Tease her back and make her laugh When she doesnt answer for a long time: reassure her that everything is okay When she looks at you with doubt: Back yourself up When she says that she likes you: she really does more than you could understand When she grabs at your hands: Hold hers and play with her fingers When she bump's into you: bump into her back and make her laugh When she tells you a secret: keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes: dont look away until she does When she misses you: she's hurting inside When you break her heart: the pain never really goes away When she says its over: she still wants you to be hers When she reposts this bulletin: she wants you to read it - Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything. - When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her- because 10 yrs later she'll remember you- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.- Tease her and let her tease you back.- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.- Give her the world.- Let her wear your clothes.- When she's bored or sad, hang out with her.- Let her know she's important.- Kiss her in the pouring rain.- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Who's ass am I kicking babe?" If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will : put ur ipod on shuffle and fill in what ever song comes up next! 1. How does the world see you? love story- Taylor swift(hmm im tring to figure out if this makes sence) 2. Will I have a happy life? One little Slip- Barenaked Ladies (r u tring to tell me something...) 3. What do my friends really think of me? Addicted- saving Abel (awkward...) 4. Do people secretly lust after me? I dont want to be in Love- Good Charlotte (sure... i so do!) 5. How can I make myself happy? This is Why Im Hot- Mims (no comment) 6. What should I do with my life? Float On- Modest Mouse ( weird...) 7. What is some good advice for me? If today was your last day - Nickelback (good advice!) 8. How will I be remembered? THat's not my name- The ting tings( r u saying i wont be remeberd by my real name!!) 9. What is my signature dancing song? Human- The killers(hmmmm...) 10. What do I think my current theme song is? Lovegame- lady gaga(ok...) 11. What does everyone else think my current theme song is? Boom Boom Pow-Black eyed peas (this is my theme song!!) 12. What song will play at my funeral? Dead and Gone-T.I. (umm that like kinds fis weird!!) 13. What type of men/women do you like? Beautiful,dirty,rich- Lady GAGa(so not completely true.) 14. What is my day going to be like? One week-barenaked ladies(so it ganna be long) 15. What will tomorrow bring? Second CHance -Shinedown (ok..) YOUR GUY SIDE: x You love hoodies. TOTAL: 16 YOUR GIRL SIDE: x You wear lip gloss/chapstick. points 14 A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. A best friend will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" A good friend will be there for you when he breaks up with you. A best friend will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." A good friend helps you find your prince. A best friend kidnaps him and brings him to you. A good friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!" A good friend will help you move. A best friend will help you move the bodies. A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!" A good friend has never seen you cry. A best friend won't tell anyone else that you cried...just laugh about it in private with you when you aren't down anymore. A good friend asks you to write down your number. A best friend has your number memorized. A good friend will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. A best friend will kick the whole crowds ass that left you. A good friend knows a few things about you. A best friend could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story. A good friend tells you she knows how you feel. A best friend just sits down and cries. good friend: Will help me learn to drive best friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance good friend: Will watch my pets when I go away best friend: Won't let me go away good friend: Will help me up when I fall down best friend: Will point and laugh because she tripped me good friend: Will bail me out of jail best friend: Will be sitting beside me saying "Dang, we screwed up, but it was so fun!" good friend: Will go to a concert with me best friend: Will kidnap the band with me good friend: Calls my parents "Mr." or "Mrs." best friend: Calls my parents "Mom" and "Dad" good friend: Asks me for my number best friend: Asks me for her number good friend: Hides me from the cops best friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place good friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public best friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too. Allodoxaphobia- Fear of opinions. Agateophobia- Fear of insanity. (i would be but...2 l8) Alliumphobia- Fear of garlic. (OH NO THE GARLIC IS EATING ME) Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. (i hate that it takes like hours to get it off) Bibliophobia- Fear of books. (ahh its all wordy and paper filled!!) Chaetophobia- Fear of hair. (its all hairy and long ahhhh!) Chromophobia or Chromatophobia- Fear of colors. (hmm so would everything be white or black? cause in light black is the absence of color and whit is all colors. but in like paint black is all colors and whit is the apsence of color!) Dutchphobia- Fear of the Dutch. (he is all dutchy eww!) Anglophobia- Fear of England or English culture, etc. (sorry cant be friends with u im afraid of you!) Ephebiphobia- Fear of teenagers. (i would be afraid of me to) Ergophobia- Fear of work. (thats me i definitaly have this phobia) Gerontophobia- Fear of old people. (uggh there so old and wrinkly!!) Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words. (ok who is the horribly mean person who came up with that name! its like hi i have a phobia but im afraid of the word that desribes it.) Euphobia- Fear of hearing good news. (AHHHHH! your getting married. ahhh! i won 20 million dollars ahhh!) Nomatophobia- Fear of names. (hi im afraid of my name so im not going to tell u it oh and dont tell be urs unless u like seeing my curled up screaming) Panophobia or Pantophobia- Fear of everything. (ahhh soup. ahhh spoon. ahhh monkey. ahhh breathing! person procedes to hold breath and diie.) funny stuff! You have just received the Amish Computer Virus. Since the Amish don't have computers, it is based on the honor system. So please delete all the files from your computer. Thank you for you cooperation. i smile because i have no idea whats going on Im nodding and laughing but Im not listening How to improve at work Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants over 100. How about achieving 103? Here’s a little math that might prove helpful. What makes life 100? If A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as: Then, K N O W L E D G E But, And, So, it stands to reason that hardwork and knowledge will get you close, attitude will get you there, but bullshit will put you over the top. And look how far this will take you... A S S K I S S I N G Think about it...and have a nice day at work I wonder... - Aren’t the ’good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first? - If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? - If you were a genie and a person asked you this wish, "I wish you would not grant me this wish" what would you do? - How come popcorn isn’t a vegetable? - Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them? - If scientists were ever going to figure out how to travel through time, wouldn’t we now be seeing people from the future? This is the stupid test! 100 stupid things that people do! (I put an X by everything I’ve done! Ya I’m honest! Boo YA! 1. Forgot to put the lid on the blender, turned it on, and had everything fly out I was honest with u now u be honest with every one else copy and paste this to ur profile and mark all the stupid things u have done! I got a 78 out of 100 how many have u gotten! ()_() Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies!) Quotes from ME!! to my friend Nikki "Run you idiot, if you dont the ice cream man will get away!" "Ow my foot!" after running into the glass door almost breaking my nose "whose the idiot who came up with the word no its just stopping you from doing stuff. Actually it could be a good thing like saying no to drugs never mind..." "jeez i have a headache no a stomach ache no headache actually i feel fine" arguing with my selff... "I have a twin!" "no" "well why does she look like me" "Sky, its a mirror." "oh..." me and my bff "WALMART IS TAKIN OVER THE WORLD!!" "Wheres my Sling bag?" "I dont know" (like 45 min l8r) "okay its time for an intevention Sky its been on your back for the last 45 minutes" "oh well u should of told me!' "we thought u knew!" "aparently not!" my mom my dad and me! "okay i swear there was a door there like yesterday." after walking through the screen of my porch. "God, Bite Me!" "What did you say young lady?!" " Um I said Tod typy!" "what?" "Tod is typy'ing on the the computor!" "do u even know a tod?" "Yeah..." "Your imaginary friend dosnt count." "he is not imaginary he is rock!" my mother shakes her head in shame my mother and sister while teaching my sis how to drive on the fricken highway they r screaming at eachother and crap and worst im in the back seat! "I don't get it why is it called ihop? y not ijump or iskip?!" (looking at me funny)"u realize that means international house of pancakes?" "well ijump means international... jumping... umbrelas... massacre... People! and iskip is international...steack...kioski...in...pennsivania! booya see i can make up what an words could mean if they were an acronym on the spot 2!" "Sky its what it really means... thats why its called i.h.o.p..." "o..." (me and my ex-boyfriend at our breakfast date in ihop lol.) "HOLY CRAP!! ITS a snake!! it was a stick now its a snake holy crap!! ahhhhhhhh!" (lol my friend Sarah. lylas sarah!) U need background 4 this one: my friend amanda stole a chicken finger puppett from my teacher and named it her viginity and then nick took it when we were standing in the middle of the hall way and amanda yells: "SKYLER YOUR BOYFRIEND STOLE MY VIRGINITY!" and we proceed to have to go to conceling and the conceler has to figure out it amanda in a virgin or not we tried to explain it was a puppett o well "Yeah...I am gonna steal your pants now..." (Lol i will not put a name with this quote but it is not me...) me nd nick r holding hands walking down the hall way im not paying attension so i walk into a concrete suport pole in the middle of the hallway and fall down and nick says "holy crap sky are you okay babe? as hilarious as you look i think i should care if you okay you are my makeout partener." I just gape at him he says "Um crap did i say tht outloud im sorry..." then he preceded to try to help me up so i just pulled him down with me lol When people ask me why i do cross country i say "Well what else do you do when a gun goes off?" When you go into court you are putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty. Norm Crosby Muffins are just ugly cupcakes...but we love them anyways. ~anonymous It is wise to walk a mile in a man's shoes before judging him... That way you're a mile away and you have his shoes. ~anonymous "Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door..." sterotypes make me angry like these: I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a stupid ditz. YOU KNOW YOU'RE AN AUTHOR IF... You talk to yourself a lot. (well im the only one who can answer my questions.) You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (well no one else has the paitience to listen.) When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean taking out someone's liver?') After uttering a profound peice of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...' (hmm my friends call it blonde momenet) You live off of sugar and caffine You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then dissappear off the face of the earth. You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random. When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it. You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground. No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper. The letters on your keyboard are wearing off. Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome. (no i actually don't) People think you have A.D.D. (including me...) You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D. (no comment) You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense. (umm, no i don't cough cough) You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason (well i find the reason apparent) Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago. (yeah theyy just gave up) And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101. (yeah i kinda did oppsie!) A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle Girl: Slow down, I'm scared! Guy: No, this is fun. Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared. Guy: Then tell me you love me. Girl: I love you, now slow down! Guy: Now give me a big hug. She gives him a big hug Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me. In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love OMG ISNT THAT SAD!! YOU MADE IT TO THE END CONGRATS!! gives everyone virtuial cookies luvs u all! Skylr ;D |
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