hey guys , I'm 25 yr old , college student..

when i first saw twilight the movie, i hadn't read the books, and after i saw it i download the 4 books from online and read them all in aweak.

i became obssessed with the twilight saga and after that i was watching an interview with the cast and they mintioned the stories on

fanfiction, so i thought what the heck i'll chek it out...and now here i am comletely facinated with it,and obssessed with every thing Twilight.

i tried to give it a try and write somthing, i have alot of ideas but writing is not my talent i cant seem to find away to put

my ideas into words...but i'll keep trying...

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

╔══╦══╦══╗ I have been diagnosed
║╔╗║╔═╣╔╗║ with Obsessive Cullen
║╚╝║╚═╣╚╝║ Disorder put this on your
╚══╩══╩══╝ profile if you've caught it to.

Twilight Oath
I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
Whenever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlies sake of course
And I promise to remember Jacob
When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
Whenever I am in the Emergency Room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to remember Rose
Whenever I see someone that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Nessie
When I see that beautiful curly hair
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my emotions are unfurled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together.

Smart Sayings:

-Silence is golden, duct tape is silver

-I'm still on earth because Heaven kicked me out and Hell is afraid I'll take over.'

-Suicide hotline...Please hold

-'Strangers have the best candy'.

-'So, you're a cannibal?'

-You're village called… They're missing their idiot

-You're just jealous because the voices only speak to ME!'

-Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you…

-Boys make good pets

-Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to…

-'Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.'

-'Muffins are just ugly cupcakes…'

-''Doctors say I have Multiple Personalities. We disagree with that.'

-'I'm not random. You just can't think as fast as I do'

-'I don't know what your problem is but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.'

-'When life gives you lemons, squirt them in the eyes of your enemies'

-'I dream of a better world...where chickens can cross roads without having their

morals questioned.'

-'Never knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run away. Death really hates that.'

-My mind works like lightning...one brilliant flash and it's gone.

-Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.