Life as a ninja. It starts with confusion and terror and doesn't get any better from there. OC Self-insert. No pairings.

All life on Earth had been consumed by Blacklight. With no Biomass to feed on, Blacklight had to evolve, adapt, and grow. Now a collective Council of Aliens discovers the existence of such a life form. How do the aliens see a form of life that is viral, how they deal with it, what are the consequences to the galaxy of such a race existing at all.

When Taylor makes a new friend at Winslow, it's not as good a thing as it seems ...

A fun-loving asari mercenary finds herself a little in over her head when she ends up abducted by terrifying aliens from beyond the galactic frontier. These asari-like creatures call themselves 'humans.' They seem to be secretly nosing about on the borders of known space, acting through proxies, conducting covert operations, and they've got a deal for an enterprising asari...

Fourteen-year-old Shinji Ikari finds himself being mentored by the greatest English teacher in the multiverse. The real question is, will the strange man called the Doctor help save the world - or end it? (Cover art by Epsthian-Artist on DeviantArt. Used with permission.)

Non-Erotica romantic comedy. Tattletale's friendship with one of her security guards grows into something her powers couldn't expect.

ANBU!Naruto. Drafted into ANBU at a young age, Naruto is guided to the path of a Captain. Leader of Team Sigma, the Hokage's Personal Guard, Naruto will lead his team and defend his Village to the best of his ability. Threats besiege the Land of Fire from all sides, and only Naruto stands before them...

...Oh wait, it did. Semi-SI.

They called her lazy, apathetic, and amoral. They also said she was, by turns, too smart and too dumb. She liked to think she was funny. None of them were wrong. OC/Self Insert

A fanfiction writer finds himself within the story. What is he to do?

"Dreaming of Sunshine" AU(s). In Which Someone Attempts to Kidnap Shikamaru And Fails Utterly. Chapters 1-3:The Futures that Result When Orochimaru Adopts, Afterward. Chapters 4-6: The Futures that Result When Danzo Adopts, Afterward.

She seemed determined enough. Maybe she'd be able to finally answer the question that had been bugging him for a while now, since he had realised he'd forgotten the answer years ago. What colour was his carpet? eventual OC/Gai Rated for swearing

Above all else, all Naruto wanted was a friend, someone who would accept him and love him unconditionally. He got more than he bargained for when the Nine-Tailed Fox became that friend. Far more than he could have ever imagined.

Worm one-shots like the best chocolate, dark and semi-sweet. Stories with varying mixes of humor and horror. Lots of appearances by creepy fellows like the Slaughterhouse Nine.

"To the Sol Alliance and all of Humanity, greetings. I am Harbinger and I have traveled across the galaxy to meet you." Shepard wasn't the first to reach the Catalyst, eons ago, someone else did and they chose synthesis, embedding the desire in the Reapers. They've searched for organics to merge with ever since and now they've found them. AU, First Contact, Humans / Reapers

The Simurgh comes to Brockton Bay. The Endbringer that sees the future has plans for the city. Victoria Dallon and Taylor Hebert must race against time to save the ones they love. Can they escape the city, or will they be driven mad by the Endbringer's song?

Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.

Taylor and Jack Slash are born in each other's places. Weaver is the infamous usurper of the Slaughterhouse Nine, while young Jacob Hebert forges his path through the underworld of Brockton Bay.

AU. Glory Girl lives out Hellhound's childhood.

Naruto and Kurama accidentally end up in the past, on the day of Naruto's birth, and are forced to live their lives all over again. They make the best of it, to everyone else's extreme confusion. (Alive Minato and Kushina, humor.)

Worm is a dark world, a grim world. Everything is gritty, everyone has an agenda. The world itself is spiraling toward ruin. Enter Hope. She's just a nice kid with a unique set of superpowers, who only wants to help people. But will she have enough of an effect on the world to stave off disaster? Only time will tell. NOTE: Hope is an original character, created using the GURPS RPG.

As per the Hat's decision, Harry gets Sorted into Slytherin upon his arrival in Hogwarts—and suddenly, the future isn't what it used to be.

Children grow up under the guidance of their parents. They learn all manner of lessons from them such as love and responsibility. It is no different for parahumans, whom offspring often inherit similar powers. Still, powered or not, you are usually stuck with the folks that birthed you. But what if your parents are interchangeable?

Konoha wakes up one morning to find that the Naruto they knew is gone. But the replacement claims he's Naruto too, and they can't be that different... right?

Vimes is Ankh Morpork's Ambassador to Middle Earth. As might be expected from the man who hates kings and Destiny, Middle Earth makes Vimes angry. Will he punch Aragorn in the nose? Will he learn a few things? Tune in for the latest!

We have our rules and stick to them. Amy because, like ivy, she needs scaffolding to build herself up. Me? Because they make for more opportunities for fun than chaos does. Although if I was being brutally honest with myself, and it's hard not to be, it's because those rules are the only thing that keep this game between us going. (AU; pre-series divergence.)

Louise the Zero. A failure even at summoning a familiar. But now she has a second chance, access to power beyond the Void. Soon a new day shall dawn on Halkeginia, its light green and terrible and beautiful. They don't know what's going to hit them. Book I in the Verdigris and Flame Sequence.

Harry is a prisoner, and Bellatrix has fallen from grace. The accidental activation of Bella's treasured heirloom results in another chance for Harry. It also gives him the opportunity to make the acquaintance of the young and enigmatic Bellatrix Black as they change the course of history.

After Madara final attack on the village, Rokudaime Kakashi uncovers a time-travel scroll. Now he's Team Seven's sensei again. And this time, he's going to do things differently. A time travel fic.

One of Konoha's greatest enemies is long dead, but Akatsuki lives on, and a new threat to peace is rising in the shinobi nations. The question is... who are the heroes, and who are the villains? AU. Follows One Small Kindness.

Now complete as of its 30th chapter. Naruto and his teammates, and his mentors, find themselves faced with a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and they take it. But time is a fickle thing, and even a ninja can't just jump inside the river of history and change its course. Not without getting swept up in it. Uzumaki Naruto is about to learn that.

A simple choice: today or tomorrow? Conceived a day earlier, a heroine, not a hero, is born. With every step, with every waking breath, Harriet Lily Potter rewrites history. But is the world truly ready to be rewritten? Does Ginny Weasley fully comprehend what it might mean to befriend this lonely, love-starved girl? - Femslash&Het - H/G main - Full summary inside -BACK FROM HIATUS

'No no no no no no'. 'Can't run'. 'Always watches, no eyes'. 'Leave me alone'. 'Don't look... or it takes you'. 'Help me.' Shinji already knew all that. He knew it all too well. But there was never anyone there to help. Misato intends to change that. If she can.

The Hokage faces a terrible potential crisis when the Village Council spreads news of the young jinchuuriki, Naruto. The world changes when a more attentive, forceful Sandaime rears his head and takes back full control of his village. Sarutobi-centric. COMPLETE.

Four Death Eaters playing poker during the First War.

Pet: n. 1. A fit of bad temper or pique. 2. An animal kept for amusement or companionship. 3. Uzumaki Naruto, host of Kyuubi no Kitsune.

Governmental contracts usually go to the lowest bidder. Even in galaxies far, far away. And, here or there, you get what you pay for.

Harry Dresden, Chicago's only professional wizard, is just looking for an escape from his latest set of enemies and happens to teleport into Equestria. Surely nothing could go wrong with that set-up.

A wiser and more experienced Naruto is forced onto a team he hadn't wanted to join in the first place. However, as they say, "Those who break the rules are trash. Those who abandon their teammates are worse than trash.". Sequel to First Try.

Without the promise of an acting career, Penny falls into a downward spiral. One person desperately wants her to get out of it.

In which the ever-enthusiastic brigade chief realizes her powers...thanks to the high price of a can of Coca-Cola.

In those days, the Company was in service to the Eye of Barad-dur. . .

Uchiha Mikoto takes the hand of an outcast child, and with it rewrites the destiny of her clan. AU. *SEQUEL UP*

Naruto makes a good shinobi, but a lousy weapon. Danzo has finally managed to connive Naruto into Root, or so he believes. Naruto, who will now be within reach of his emotionally inept, traumatized, fanatical devotees. What on earth was he thinking?

Sakura thought she was a capable kunoichi until she died in the Chuunin Exam. Now she's stuck in a loop, dying again and again while she struggles to understand her strange predicament. How hard can it be to pass one stupid test? Sakura/Naruto/Hinata

AU time travel: The kyuubi no kitsune knew something was wrong, but couldn't put a paw on quite what. However, there are benefits to being a force of nature, including time itself bending to accommodate you. Edited version on AO3!

Someone messed with Luthor's mind. Someone was going to pay. A mystery that slowly unveils a terrible secret within the DCU and Lex's response to what he finds. Now complete!

Naruto has been hiding something since the time she was ten. Now she's finally graduated from the Academy only to find that the guy she's sorta-kinda been dating is her sensei. All Kakashi knows is that Naruto is scarily familiar. Kakashi/Fem!Naruto, AU

When Louise Valliere performed her summons for her familiar, she certainly didn't expect for it to be a human! Strangely enough, the boy she summoned, Shirou Emiya, didn't expect to get summoned so soon. He hadn't even died yet!

After marrying Chihiro, it's Haku's turn to explore a new world. Haku must navigate human life as he struggles to find his place as a god in a faithless, electronic age. Cowritten with Murinae.

Lies have power. They can change a simple-minded believer into a two-faced schemer and a timid follower into a fanatical devotee. They can change a child angry at the world into a man consumed by more than vengeance. But that power is a lie as well.

After receiving a time travel jutsu as payment for a mission, the original four members of Team 7 each get a chance to go back to one event in their life and change it. Surely they will use such an awesome power responsibly...right? Don't count on it.

She fought her way to the Box, and somehow made it work, and now she's back. Will she be able to prevent the end of the world this time around? -- If this isn't the world's most gratuitous Peggy Sue fic, I'd like to know what is.

AU. Naruto is able, driven and a true ninja genius. What will he accomplish? What will he fail to accomplish? An intelligent, genjutsu wielding, quasi-super-but-try-it, leader Naruto epic. Features strategy, realistic combat and subterfuge. **Naruto/?**

Disguised as a girl, Naruto will spy on Kage level kunoichi at the Cute Polar Bear Hot Springs Festival. On a related note, Sasuke deals with his growing attration to a mysterious new kunoichi. Also, the first ever Iruka Love Polygon. That I'm aware of.

COMPLETE. Young Naruto is prohibited from being Ninja of the Leaf. Left to his own devices he takes an unusual path to power as a Puppeteer. Smart!Powerful!Wily!Naruto. Lots of conflict with Orochimaru, Sasori and other Akatsuki.

Dumbledore doesn’t ignore the 2nd prophecy! He apprentices Harry and teaches him a rare form of magic, but draws the ire of a secret society who seek to guard this knowledge and do Harry in. Assassination attempts on multiple fronts. H/F, Yr. 4 GoF AU.

Yamai wa ki kara, sickness is a thing of the spirit. She never asked for this life and living it as a Uchiha wasn't making it any easier. Genfic. Divergent timeline and events from The Valley of the End.

Ayakawa Yukiko retired from being a ninja, and she's come to terms with that. Then the Third Hokage summons her for an assignment that will change her life. AU story, set six years premanga. COMPLETE