A little about me, then.

I'm male, I live in Britain, don't ask for an address.

My hobbies include:

Writing(obviously), games, especially RTS but not getting ganked by my mates, documentaries and stand-up comics. Some folk say I should try it sometime but to hell with that! I mean, what kind of a person would find my asinine, long-winded ramblings about how we're ruled by idiots, why we're more or less a virus with shoes and why certain things in life should be a damn sight more legal than they actually are to be actually funny? I mean sure, some folk get a chuckle, but it's not like people would find it funny or be awake long enough for me to get to the punchline at the end. Or was it the beginning? I think maybe Mike Tyson might know the best place for a punch line. Maybe I should ask him for advice. I enjoy anime, am always open to suggestions and am also available for birthday parties.

Wait, that last one's a lie. It's something else entirely. It'll come back to me eventually...

And now for something completely different.

I'm a rather scatterbrained writer. There is a lot of crap on my hard drive, most of it junk I don't like but don't necessarily bin because it might be usable somewhere else.

So I might have a slew of updates for one story or a scatter-shot for all my stories or a new story entirely or nothing at all. It's not disinterest, it's that I'm very finicky about what I post, so I might hit a good flow one day and get six, sometimes seven thousand words written (seriously, some of my chapters I hash out in about a day...) and keep maybe two or three thousand of those, or I might hit a funk, or real life might intervene (Curse you and all you entail! Curse you I say!) and you get nothing.

I guess I mean to say that I ain't got an update schedule, hell I ain't got a writing schedule. In fact, if it weren't for those pesky Real Life requirements I wouldn't have a schedule.

I'm beginning to think I may have issues. But issues are fun, get good chuckles and for some reason I'm in better mental health than quite a few folk I know.

If you feel like posting a review, post it. If you feel like posting a flame, post it. Just don't expect me to leave it up for long. Or for me to not reverse-heckle you if, by some miracle, your babied, far-larger-than-you-are ego puts out something funny. And those of you who post good reviews that get deleted, my bad - clicked the wrong one.

And one final thought;

You are now imagining George Takei voicing C-3PO.

Have fun with that.