An unashamed Sarah Walker fan - In my eyes, she can do no wrong. If she does have any faults, they pale into insignificance whenever she smiles.

I'm pretty sure I fell in love with Sarah Walker before Chuck did.

Reading the Chuck fanfiction is one of my main pastimes and has kept me sane since the end of Chuck Series 5. I thank SOME of the authors for their absolutely amazing contributions. There are some really exceptional writers out there and I am seriously in awe of your talents!

Writers ! Would love to see more Sarah-centric fiction with her kicking ass and not making stupid mistakes that force others to have to save her.

After all, she knows a hundred ways to kill a man with her bare hands, so why do authors seemingly have her lose every fight, or need help finishing off the bad guys?

She's the CIA's top agent, so why do writers have her make so many mistakes - most of which a rookie wouldn't make?

When she's angry, terrorists quail, hardened agents tremble! From reading a lot of the fan fiction, I would ask Why? We all know that she'll be overpowered and then Chuck will come along, not make a single mistake, totally out think all the baddies, kick everyone's butt and save the day - and all this, with or without the Intersect!

Sorry, it's great for Chuck Bartowski fans, but I'm left feeling slightly nauseous at how inept she is made out to be.

Wish I could write. Wish I had a tenth of the talent some of the fanfiction writers have ! Wish I had Sarah Walker :-)

OK, I'm gonna have to VENT !!!!

M rated. In inimitable author fashion...Don't like, then Sod Off !

Well...I've read more than 600 of these fanfics and I'm just about done. At the start, I would have considered myself strongly pro Charah. But slowly this has changed.

WHY?

Because, the number of quite frankly ridiculous asinine stories where Chuck has a contingency plan for EVERYTHING, can't do ANYTHING wrong, is loved by EVERYONE and solves EVERY problem in the world leaves me wanting to literally vomit. I can't help but think that the writers of these stories are just playing out what they would like to be like in real life - I wonder how that's working out for them LMAO

So I'm done. Congratulations! You've actually turned me into someone who is close to hating how Chuck Bartowski is portrayed in these fanfics.

For once, just once, I'd like to read a story where he, being the super duper, badass do-gooder he is constantly made out to be, tries to be a hero and takes on a vicious no-good, 12 year old jay-walker... and gets shot and dies. YAY! Everyone can go back to the real world with its real problems that have to be dealt with in a realistic way.

So sue me. I'm gonna cheer on the underdogs in these fanfics. Yep, I'm gonna support the baddies. Those poor unfortunates who you writers have blessed with IQs in single digits, reactions slower than a piece of bluetack and the tactical awareness of a grapefruit in a coma. Those poor unfortunates who you writers then send up as helpless cannon fodder against a Chuck who is written as Iron man, Thor, the Hulk, Casanova, Jesus Christ and Skynet, all rolled into one. Yeah right, you've made Chuck seem like a real bad ass. Chuck is so great, Chuck is so marvellous. Look how he defeated these 250 armed & dangerous bad guys in under 3 seconds using just an empty 7-Up can and an old supermarket trolley. What a man! ...What a load of, more like.

I'd like a story where every woman (good or evil) DOES have a mind of their own and don't "gaze adoringly at him" and swoon when he's opened a door for them, or because they've seen him help an old dear across the road.

Does that happen in real life to anyone? Do unbelievably gorgeous women gaze adoringly at you when you anticipate your partner's needs by passing her the salt before she asks for it? Are they ready to drop their panties for you because you don't "look at them like all the other men do" ?. I can't help laughing with embaressment everytime I see this written in a fanfic. It's all so ridiculous and pitiful! I've lost count of the number of times Sarah realises how much she adores Chuck EVERY time he doesn't order olives on her pizza! FGS! Do you writers seriously believe that Chuck getting so much credit for doing the most mundane things is realistic? And why doesn't anybody else in these fanfics get ANY credit for doing similar things?

I'd like a story where the ONLY woman who wants him sexually is Beckman - I want her to look at him "like all the other women do!" I want her staring lustfully, her tongue hanging out, saliva dripping on the floor as she mentally undresses him (You know what I mean - like ALL of the men in these fanfiction stories... apart from Chuck apparently). I want their encounter to be luridly explicit with copious amounts of body fluids being exchanged! (Anything is better than the ridiculous contrived drivel some of the writers are posting about how attractive Chuck SUDDENLY is to the opposite sex).

And no, it's totally unrealistic to make out that he's the best in the world in bed and that he has the biggest penis any woman has ever seen in the history of the United States. - He's a nerd FGS. He's had like two girlfriends in 27 years. The only thing he knows how to use is his right hand because thats the only thing he's had sex with in the last five years. Oh and...being a hacker and presumably able to type fast does NOT make him better than anyone else at sticking his fingers into ladies intimate places!

Seriously, unless Chuck has been practicing on Morgan for the last five years, I would think his and Sarah's first night would definitely be a case of "Charles Carmichael ALWAYS comes quickly!" Not the earth shattering, orgasm loaded, seeing stars type scenes that most authors write about Chuck's bedroom performance. Again, it wouldn't be so bad if it all wasn't so ridiculously over the top with overuse of superlatives to describe how he's the best Sarah's ever, ever, EVER, EEEVVVVEEEERRRR had in bed!

Quite frankly the bigging up of Chuck in some of these stories is so over the top, it's embarrassing and I find myself cringing and wondering how anyone over the age of six could write these sorts of things and expect adults to swallow it.

Please! Chuck is NOT the Messiah so stop writing him as such. If I want to read about somebody who never makes a mistake, and is so good, people just love and trust him after 2 minutes of being in his presence, I will read the Bible. Its better written and more believable.

Plotlines : At the end of the day, I can't help thinking its just sheer laziness on the part of the authors. Writers can't be bothered to research what they write, and can't be ar$ed to think of a feasible plot thats actually believable or logical. They just take the easy way out - write a story where you don't have to explain anything or reason anything out, or apply any logic or realism - just say that Chuck can do absolutely anything because he's suddenly confident, or because the Intersect's been modified somehow. Utter purile tripe. They then feed it to the readers with an expectation of across the board praise and adulation.

C'mon writers. We're not fools so don't treat us as such by asking us to go along with reading and encouraging the drivel you've produced "cos' it's your story". That's just insulting our intelligence.

Sarah : With regards to Sarah, almost all fanfics put her in the "damsel in distress" role. (a Helluva demotion from the feared "Enforcer" who is widely considered to be the CIA's best!) - It's HUMILIATING! Sarah is the person who should need saving the least!

She now can't seem to complete a single mission without having to be saved by Chuck. This basically diminishes her to the level of brainless civilian housewife, only good for straightening Chuck's ties. She's spent umpteen years completing missions successfully to become the CIAs best but since meeting Chuck can't complete a single mission without some sort of help or support from him.

I can only surmise that meeting Chuck has had a severely detrimental effect on what once was a brilliant kickass ninja superspy. If I was Sarah and really loved Chuck, I wouldn't step foot out of the house - wouldn't wanna get captured and then put Chuck to all the trouble of having to come save me.

And if I was Chuck, I'd be thinking, "WTF? Where's the kickass ninja superspy I fell in love with? She's turned into an incompetent weakling who keeps going off and then needs me to save her all the time!"

Note how almost every fanfic and even the TV series harp on about how a relationship makes both participants stronger. What a load of codswallop! There is absolutely no way that is true. Not if you read most fanfics. In fanfics, Sarah in a relationship becomes weak, is incompetant, prone to making childish mistakes and cannot concentrate for endlessly agonising over her love for Chuck and how she misses him etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc.

Chuck in a relationship, conversely becomes some sort of a God and whilst he agonises over his partner (although not normally to anywhere near the same extent as Sarah does - why is that?), he gets everything absolutely right and never makes a mistake (Strange huh?). Talk about inequality! I cannot envisage a clearer message for them NOT having a relationship.

Basically these fanfics just reinforce what Bryce said - relationships will get a spy killed. (and in most fanfics, Sarah would be dead many many times over if her husband/partner wasn't given over the top super powers and the need to save her so the author can show us how badass he is).

Seriously. I get that love can affect people. I mean, can you remember the last time you fell in love? And how you totally went to pieces at work? How you were a blubbering wreck at meetings, unable to say anything sensible? How you couldn't do even the simplest things, even if your life depended on it? Yeah, riiiight! NO! Love does affect you, but it doesn't turn you into an incompetent moron. You can still type, you can still attend meetings, you can still fix cars, you can still be a SPY. So stop with the ridiculous plotlines about Sarah and how love turns her into a blubbering mess. Its total crap and totally unrealistic ! There's countless other people in the world who can't save themselves and need help. Get Chuck to save one of them if you must insist on trying to prove what a hero he is!

Questions! Why do authors need to diminish all of the characters so that Chuck can look good? If Chuck is such a know it all badass, why does he even need the others to make mistakes in order to look good?

Writers! Why not try to write something where both Chuck AND Sarah are actually a team (you know, married couples are supposed to be a team) - BOTH of them contributing to the success of the mission and making up for each other when that other falls short. - and they should BOTH fall short equally, whether planned or unplanned! Always having one superhero and one patsy is excruciatingly boring, and again, its just lazy uncreative writing.

Don't get me started on the quality of the baddie bosses that are normally pitted against this invincible, infallible paragon of purity and goodness. Would you watch a 2 hr film of Superman going around catching 10 year old school bullies & punishing them with extreme prejudice? No, the Man of Steel is always pitted against someone who will give him a run for his money and he struggles and the enjoyment, intensity and suspense is in watching him finally overcome seemingly insurmountable odds.

Writers take note, there is no enjoyment in making Chuck totally invincible, the best at everything and always right and then getting him to go after basically silly old men in raincoats with IQs of 10 or below.

Turning Chuck into Superman and then letting him easily get the better of a load of baddies (because they are so pathetic) doesn't prove what a hero he is. It proves what a poor imagination the writer has.

If your main baddie is the head of a global terrorist organisation and is the most violent and dangerous criminal mastermind in the world...then he won't be making stupid basic mistakes. Will he? He will plan ahead accounting for every contingency. Won't he? He won't employ dumb chimps as his muscle. Will he? He won't allow Chuck to just come into his base, free all the prisoners, and single handedly kill all his men and then him. Will he? If your main baddie is guilty of any of the above, then you need to seriously rethink your storyline, or delay finishing your story until you've at least attained the age of 12.

Surprise, surprise! These pathetic no-hope retarded baddies usually have absolutely no problem putting one over Casey, Sarah and any other spurious good guys in the story, therebye diminishing all of the good guys who can then be deemed even more inept than the baddies!

Of course this would then open up the opportunity for the shining light that is Chuck to come save the day. (Cue huge fanfare of trumpets as Chuck arrives on the scene to take ALL the glory! And line up all the other characters, ready to thank, adore and worship him for saving their incompetent luckless a$$es!). It's all so childishly obvious and inane.

C'mon writers! Put your "invincible, can't do anything wrong, never make a mistake, planned for every conceivable contingency" Chuck up against three baddies who have exactly the same qualities/powers as him. Not so easy to think of a good plotline now is it ? That would require you to actually think about what you are writing and work out how Chuck could possibly win - How about...and this is quite revolutionary...Casey and Sarah actually helping instead of making stupid contrived mistakes and needing to be saved to make Chuck look good?

Of course, you could always write him as more human and fallible with normal weaknesses to contend with. Then you could also lower the calibre of the baddies accordingly. Pfffftttt What am I thinking? Chuck not always being right? Not being able to vanquish armies of bad guys? Not being able to convert hardened female enemies with just a soulful flash of his chocolaty brown eyes? God forbid!

Angst. WTF? Almost every story on here is riddled with this and its getting tedious and boring. Jeez, give me a break will ya? Its like reading the same morose, depressing story over and over again, with only the authors name changing. Heres a refreshing idea. Why don't you be different. Stop following the others. Stick your neck out and maybe write something that doesn't include this. Not because angst is stupid. Its just that it been done again and again and again and again and again. You getting the picture?

And what's with all of these people wanting to read stories where "Sarah has to fight for Chuck's attention - because she's strung him along for so long"? Again, I think it may be because they see themselves as "Chuck" and like the idea that someone like Sarah has to run after them. My deepest sympathies go out to these poor lonely people... actually Nah!, I have no sympathy for them. Get a life you sad f*cks!

Is there a story where Sarah doesn't "string him along"? One where she ignores what she thinks is right about protecting Chuck. One where she disregards her upbringing, her CIA training, her years of experience and all the things she's learnt during the only life she's known? A story where she doesn't resist, gives in to her feelings, trusts Chuck's view of something he knows nothing about and despite her well founded fears, gives him the relationship he's been consistently pressurising her about.

And then within a few days is reassigned and Chuck is either thrown in a bunker for the rest of his life or badly maimed/killed when she's not there to protect him? (Ellie and Devon being tortured and killed as a result of Sarah giving in to Chuck would also be a bonus). Please, if there is, let me know. I wanna read it. I can almost guarantee I will love it.

And now onto the huge number of calls for CHARAH. What this usually means in the majority of stories is, a sugary sweet, lovey dovey, pink tinted plotline that goes into minute detail about...Chuck. And how Sarah loves all those things about...yes, you've guessed it...Chuck.

How Chuck's bum is so sexy and how he looks after her so well and how his nerdy walk turns her on. How cute he looks when he's concentrating, and how gloriously potent he is in bed and how kind he is to everyone and how he's so considerate of her feelings and how hes so sensitive to her moods. How she loves his soulful chocolaty brown eyes, and the way his hair curls into animal shapes and how his eyebrows dance and how her legs go weak when he quirks a smile and how his kisses are just so, so amazing. How he's so muscley and toned even though the only exercise he's had in the last 15 years is lifting an X-Box controller. Oh look! Chuck inserts a surprisingly well toned finger into his nostril and rummages around and Sarah's heart soars because he looks so adorable and cute picking his masculine, perfectly shaped nose with those long gentle tactile fingers. And she thinks she must be the luckiest girl in the world because he's just so perfect and he's all hers! etc etc. etc. etc.

Are you getting the idea yet?

Where are all the stories where Chuck moons like a hopeless love lorn fool over Sarah? Where's the detail? If you're lucky there may be a couple of sentences generally stating that Sarah is beautiful or sexy and that's your lot!

Honestly, are the majority of authors & readers on here female? Or gay? ... Because that's the only reason I can think that so much attention is given to describing all of Chuck's supposedly good points (in minute detail) in these Charah fics, and Sarah is really only included to worship him.

Think about it...when's the last time you read a fanfic where Chuck gets the opportunity to gaze at Sarah's ar$e ? If you do find one, it will usually then go on to say how Chuck averts his gaze because he's so considerate, sensitive, respectful, not like all those other crude men etc etc etc. In other words, the opportunity to describe Sarah's deliciously exquisite, perfectly shaped bum is quickly replaced by describing what an all round good & decent guy Chuck is.

I'M A STRAIGHT ADULT MALE GODDAMMIT !!!!!!!!!!!

I. do. NOT. want. to. read. about Chuck's sexy bum! Or any of his other over-exaggerated qualities for that matter! I want to read about Sarah's sexy bum. I want to read about all the things that Chuck finds so amazing about Sarah!.

So Charah as far as I'm concerned is mostly very one sided and written by and aimed at the female and homosexual readers. Nothing there for me :-(

Next is the obsession some writers have with Sarah being all about action and Chuck being all about talking. And their need to have Sarah always apologising for it or regretting it, or being punished for it.

LMAO As if being all about action is a bad thing.

Let me ask you...Would you give a flying f*ck how many times a day your wife told you she loved you, if you then caught her in bed enthusiastically shagging your hairy but very well endowed neighbour? Would actions speak louder to you than words then? Or would you be happy to just wait till she's finally got her breathing under control and is able to tell you that she loves you again?

Let me put it clearly for you. Neither form of communication is wrong so get off Sarah's case. You're the writer. You're supposed to be creative. Find a way for both forms of communication to work. Or failing that, for a change, let's make it so that it's Chuck who has to apologise, or have regrets, or get punished for being a "talker".

Onto the issue of trust. So many fanfics seem to place a great deal of emphasis on Chuck and Sarah trusting each other in their relationship. No secrets between them, no running off without the other, no anything without the other. When authors invariably have Sarah breaking these rules, she is punished mercilessly. The amount of angst resulting from one of her contrived transgressions is laughable and the amount of apologising she has to do to poor, "betrayed" Chuck to make it up to him is just childishly silly and totally over the top.

Of course when Chuck makes the same transgression, then it is just glossed over. Sarah gets to maybe say "be careful" or something similar when she finds out he's galloped off on a dangerous side mission without her.

Double standards? ...Why? ... Of course you know the answer. How on earth would the author make Chuck look good if he didn't go off on his own to make that miraculous breakthrough in a mission, or be a martyr?

And as Chuck can't do ANYTHING wrong, he shouldn't be pulled up when he breaks Sarah's trust. Should he? Seriously fed up and frustrated with reading this sort of moronic childish premise in fanfics.

Why all this critisism from me? Why don't I write something? No. I've tried (REALLY tried!) and my efforts are as embarrassingly insipid as some of the drivel on here. I know my limitations and I would not have the bare-faced cheek to insult the readers on here by trying to post something. But I have read tens of thousands of books in my lifetime and I can recognise a good story, an average story, a crap story and stories that are utter unadulterated garbage.

At the end of the day, you can think what you will of me, that is your opinion and your right. But know that above all, I am an avid fan of fiction. I desperately want to read good well written stories about my favourite TV series. Ones that hold my attention. Ones that have me on the edge of my seat. Ones where I am disappointed that I've completed the chapter and the next one hasn't been posted. Ones where I can sit back and say honestly to myself, "Yes, that was an excellent, excellent story!" And I see so much potential in the writers on this site and then see it all wasted on lazy, contrived, almost babyish plotlines that seem to have only one goal - to make Chuck look unbelievably good - at the expense of everything else. And this is encouraged by readers who seem to have no interest in a good fanfic but just want to see their hero win and get all the glory and everyone to worship him- no matter how or at what cost to the other characters or indeed, to normal logic.

I seriously treasure the fanfics where Chuck makes mistakes or has to be saved or actually is written as part of a team instead of someone who's always got the answer, is always right about absolutely everything and can not be beaten in a fight no matter how many enemies there are. I treasure those fanfics that actually let me read about Chuck, the human being, the bumbling nerd with a heart of gold. As he was in the TV series, which is where my addiction started.

Hopefully anybody who reads the above will see through my errmmmm...colourful language and see that I do make valid points. If I've achieved that then its more than I expected. Cheers!