THIS ACCOUNT IS MERELY FOR CRITIQUING STORIES/FICS

I will not be posting stories under this account.

I REPEAT

I will not be posting stories under this account.

I'm not daft enough to do so, darlings.

Under Construction ...

Greetings dearies! Welcome to my domain!

I'm a very organized person, and I love categorizing. Bear with me.

You're probably here because I either:

A) Praised your fic.

B) Criticized your fic.

or

C) Criticized your fic rather rudely (feel free to call it a 'flame').

If it's A) ...

Good job. I liked your story. Your fic has one or more of the following:

-A logical, well thought-out plot

-Contains original/balanced characters, i.e. NO MARY-SUES

-Good grammar and spelling

-You're not begging for reviews

-You're civil to reviewers and potential readers

-You don't insert A/N's in the middle of the story

-You use capitalization and indentions properly

-You don't use self-inserts

-There are no run-on sentences

-You don't hold little side-conversations or 'chats' with one/more of the characters at the end of chapters

Basically, the punch line is this:

You haven't butchered the English language.

If it's B) ...

You've violated any of the above. And ... Congrats! I've decided to take some time out of my very busy day to offer you advice on how you can improve your story. You can take it, and make a real effort at improvement. You may do so by: replying to my review, getting a beta, or going to any of the following links:

http://www.fanfiction.net/forum/Advanced_Writing_Tips/29071/

http://www.fanfiction.net/forum/The_Furnace/30302

OR

You can ignore me completely.

If it's the latter, someone else along the line will most likely leave you a review--and it will most likely not be nice. And then you will, most likely, have wished you would have taken up my offer.

If it's C) ...

You have successfully violated the terms of A) and pissed me off. How have you achieved this? Simple. You're a jerk.

You've written a travesty to the English language, and you've blatantly ignored constructive criticism offered to you multiple times. In the process, you've been unnecessarily rude and impolite to those reviewers suggesting you improve/redo your story, and entered a state of denial.

OR

You've promised to improve your story and you haven't.

Generally, I try to be very civil in my reviews towards authors. I tend to sound sarcastic very often, a complete jerk even. Take it any way you like. But if I do seem to sound like that, it's probably because you're under category "C". And if there's one thing--make that two things--that irk me, it's when authors lack respect for their readers and reviewers, and when they refuse to believe that their story needs work.

I try not to use profanity in my reviews, but when I do you've really, really pissed me off. Again, victims usually fall under category "C".

If you're a "C", and are still confused, you can go here for further information (with respect to F/R):

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1223755/Flame_Rising

Do not try to argue with me over your fic.

I would rather we discuss things like the mature and civilized adults we are.

FYI

I'm quite the admirer of F/R's work, if you haven't noticed.

DISCLAIMER

I do not profess to be a complete know-it-all. I am not the god of fanfiction. But I am quite knowledgeable in the realm of writing, and I offer help where I deem it is needed.