MY SHIPS

NCIS

(Gibbs/Jenny)
JIBBS

(McGee/Abby)
McAbby

(Tony/Ziva)
Tiva
shetek B'vakesha "shut up"

(Tony/Kate)
Tate

"Sometimes things aren't so simple Abby,
sometimes you can't control the outcome,
sometimes you have to... look at the reality
in front of you... and accept it."
~ Jenny S.

THESE RULES I MADE UP ARE LOOKED UP :)

GIBBS RULESRule #1: Never screw over your partner (Blowback - Season 4) Rule #2: Always wear gloves at a crime scene (Yankee White - Season 1) Rule #3: Don't believe what you're told. Double check (Yankee White - Season 1) Rule #3: Never be unreachable (Deception - Season 3) Rule #4: If you have a secret, the best thing is to keep it to yourself. The second-best is to tell one other person if you must. There is no third-best (Blowback - Season 4) Rule #7: Always be specific when you lie (Reveille - Season 1) Rule #8: Never take anything for granted (Probie - season 3) Rule #9: Never go anywhere without a knife (One Shot, One Kill - Season 1 / Missing - Season 1 / Probie - Season 3) Rule #12: Never date a co-worker (Enigma - Season 1) Rule #15: Always work as a team (Leap of Faith - Season 5) Rule #18: It's better to seek forgiveness than ask permission (Silver War - Season 3) Rule #22: Never, ever bother Gibbs in interrogation (Smoked - Season 4) Rule #23: Never mess with a Marine's coffee if you want to live (Forced Entry - Season 2)

ABBY'S RULES
1. Never lie to Abby (Toxic 21x6)
2. Remember her birthday!
3. Treat the team as family: desertion not permitted!
4. Scientists do not rely on luck.
5. Gibbs' gut is allowed to be lucky because he is not a scientist.
6. Don't forget to defrag your computer.
7. Trust the evidence.
8. Trust Gibbs.
9. Trust the team!
10. Dress codes are for other people.
11. Be kind to your equipment./ Always keep a spare(Caff-Pow)
12. Be happy!

MCGEE'S RULES
1. When in doubt, speak geek.
2. When colleagues insist that the characters in your book are based on them, repeat the word "fiction" as many times as possible.
3. When the computers don't work and the computer technicians won't work, fix them yourself.
4. Always speak the truth.
5. Always be respectful and polite, no matter what the provocation.
6. Take all possible opportunities to get the revenge of the nerd, whilst maintaining very polite language.
7. Use vocabulary and implacable will to intimidate the person you interrogate.
8. Be willing to stand up to gangleaders, by using your height to stare down upon them.
9. Don't ask, so that they won't have to tell.
10. Avoid heights.
11. Always play the MIT card

DINOZZO'S RULES
1. Never sit on the sidelines when your people need you.
2. If a sexually attractive female is involved in the case ALWAYS hit on her.
3. Never underestimate your opponent.
4. Always seek out a movie analogy.
5. Take every opportunity to do a Tommy Lee Jones speech from the Fugitive.
6. When doing Tommy Lee Jones impressions, get the accent right.
7. Always defuse a situation with humour rather than resorting to authoritarianism.
8. Always make sure your work is done but make it look like you are just lazing around.
9. If said work is not yet done, come back in the middle of the night to complete it.
10. Do not fall in love when working undercover.
11. Do not go undercover posing as the boyfriend of anyone.
12. Be very careful whom you tongue-kiss: it might be a man in disguise.
13. Never pick on a probie when he is down.
14. Maintain the morale of the rest of the team, even when you have sufficient experience to be really very worried about Gibbs.
15. Develop a firstname working relationship with the Director but defer to Gibbs.
16. Don't drink the boss' coffee-ever.

One of DiNozzo's actual rules is never date a woman who eats more than you, I think it maybe 8 (clarify please). nr. 3 is also real (hiatius?)

ZIVA'S RULES
1. If it annoys you, kill it.
2. Attack first, ask questions later.

3. Drive fast; its the best way to avoid roadside bombs

Unofficial Rule A: Never apologise, as it's a sign of weakness.
Unofficial Rule B: We don't believe in coincidence.
Unofficial Rule C: But we do believe in bad luck.
Unofficial Rule D: Don't speak geekspeak, speak English.
Unofficial Rule E: Headslap only the back of your underlings' heads: anything else would be demeaning (Gibbs once said a slap on the face was humiliating, whereas a cuff to the back of the head was a wakeup call).
Unofficial Rule F: Always anticipate
Unofficial Rule G: Know how to do every job that your underlings can do (this rule falls down if one your underlings happens to be Tim McGee, but we would all get a good laugh watching Gibbs trying to hack into the CIA's computers)
Unofficial Rule H: If a computer doesn’t work, hit it.
Unofficial Rule I: Always acknowledge good work by underlings.
Unofficial Rule J: When using Truth by Intimidation, always remain silent for at least a count of 5 after doing the act of intimidation, at which point the canary will sing.
Unofficial Rule K: When in the interrogation room, stop the recording devices when the information strays into personal matters irrelevant to the investigation (e.g., don’t ask/don’t tell rules for gay Marines, revelations of unrequited love)
Unofficial Rule L: When your cell phone breaks, have DiNozzo "fix" it (unwrap a new one from the supply drawer)
Unofficial Rule M: Always ask for permission to touch the body: it belongs to the M.Examiner (Ducky has been known to get stroppy if anyone spoils his crime scene, he reportedly threw somebody down a hill).
Unofficial Rule N: When doing a shootout, don’t kill the hostage and avoid shooting off their ear.
Unofficial Rule O: Don't call Ziva 'Ma'am' and don’t call Jenny 'Madam Director', if you want to live.
Unofficial Rule P: When hacking the CIA, give underlings a get out of jail free pass.
Unofficial Rule Q: When breaking others' rules, do not get caught.
Unofficial Rule R: If you want to gain access to a secure area to investigate, carry a cup of coffee and some paperwork and act like you belong.
Unofficial Rule S: Never, ever (ever) get Ziva angry.

MY FAVORITE RULE
RULE # 50 ALWAYS WATCH NCIS

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Skj_ri1o4aY GIBBS' RULES VERY COOL VIDEO

CRIMINAL MINDS
JJ / Reid
Garcia / Morgan
Hotch/Hailey

House MD
Wuddy
Huddy
"Thirteen" / Foreman
Amber / Wilson

CSI: NY
Stella / Mac
Danny / Linsey
Don / Stella

HOUSE MD quotes

Wilson: Did you speak to Cuddy last night?
House: She's fine. Why would it take anyone more than a few hours to get over misplacing a baby?
Wilson: You spoke to her?
House: Kinda hit that, so she's all on my jock.
Wilson: Whoa...wha..what?
House: Huh. Everyone else thought I was kidding.
Wilson: You hit? Like making out? Or full on sex or -
House: Got a chart laid out with all the bases. I'll talk you through it.
Wilson: Well, what are you going to do?
House: What can I do? I'm going to ignore her for the rest of my life. This mosquito bite kept me awake -
Wilson: Don't care about the bug bite. She's your boss.
House: So now I have two reasons to ignore her. It was...just a kiss.
Wilson: There's a reason -
House: Yes. Those large things in her bra.
Wilson: You were hiding it from me! Means it meant something to you.
House: Yeah, I fiendishly concealed it within the phrase 'I hit that'.

Wilson: If you dated Cuddy there would -
House is answering the phone
House: Sorry, I get better reception when you're not here.

Dr. Cuddy: You think I like the cameras? You think I want the whole world watching you check out my ass and question my wardrobe?
Dr. House: Would it be better if I checked out your wardrobe and questioned your ass?
Dr. Cuddy: A little part of me...
Dr. House: interrupting her There is no little part of you.

Criminal Mind Quotes

Garcia:...A guy went crazy on a bunch of computers at a science lab, screaming, "We will soon be the slaves and the machines will be the masters."
Garcia: Looking around at her many computers Yikes. That would totally suck for me. Whisper I'm surrounded in here.
Morgan: Come on, what are you worried about? You've got me to protect you.
Garcia: Hah! Now that gets my blood up.

Reid: I need to stop by a bookstore and pick up a copy of Empty Planet. I'd like to reread it before we talk to the author... I haven't read it since I was six.
Morgan: Six? I was still riding my Big Wheeler at six years old.
Reid: Do you mind? It will only take ten minutes.
Gideon: To buy it or to read it?
Reid: Uh... both, actually

JJ: while playing gin Oh I'm beating you, genius.
Reid: Genius Doctor Reid let you win.

Chief Yates: Listen, these people...they're my friends. They're my neighbors, good people. I don't want anybody assuming that they're involved.
Hotchner: We just got here. We're not assuming anything.

Garcia: He who seeks the "Queen of All Knowledge," speak and be recognized.
Reid: arcia, we're sending you some cigarettes.
Garcia: Why not a flesh-eating virus? It'll be faster and far less painful.

Reid: We need some butts rushed to the lab for DNA analysis.
Garcia: Reid... I love it when you say 'butts.'

Garcia: What are you doing?
JJ: I'm mapping out where all the victims were found, starting with Gideon's first case file.
JJ jabs a pushpin to the map
Garcia: Ow! Stabby!

Erin Strauss: I believe you're no longer effective in your post.
Hotchner: Modern furniture...strategically placed magazines, the framed diplomas, the art in the wall...they're all in conflict with your family photos. You have three children but you favor the middle one, your son.
Erin Strauss: What do you think you're doing?
Hotchner: Of course, you love all your children but not like your son
Erin Strauss:That's enough!
Hotchner: The bonsai you obsessively nurture is to compensate for feelings of failure...
Erin Strauss:Agent Hotchner I said that's enough!! My position is not in question here. As your superior, I am questioning your ability to lead your team...
Hotchner: My team? Let me tell you about my team: Agent Morgan fought to protect his identity from the very people who could save him. Why? Because trust has to be earned, and there are very few people he truly trusts. Reid's intellect is a shield which protects him from his emotions, and at the moment his shield is under repair. Prentiss over-compensates because she doesn't yet feel she's a part of the team; she needn't worry. Everyday Agent Jareau fields dozens of requests for our team, and every night she goes home hoping she has made the right choices. Garcia fills her office with figurines and color, to remind herself to smile as the horror fills her screens... And Agent Gideon in many ways is damned by his profound knowledge of others, which is why he shares so little of himself, yet he pours his heart into every case we handle. I stand by my actions, and I stand by my team, and if you think that you can find a better person for the job, then good luck.

Reid: May we come in?
Tobias: I´m sorry. I don´t let anyone in the house.
Reid: Actually, I really have to, you know, go.
JJ: You do?
Reid: Yeah, for thirty minutes.
JJ: Why didn´t you say something in the car?

Hotch: gently Reid, you alright?
Reid: while hugging Hotch I knew you'd understand. Reid turns and hugs JJ
JJ: I am so sorry.
Reid: It's alright, it wasn't your fault.

Morgan: Hey girl you're on speaker. Behave.
Garcia: Or what, you'll spank me?"
Morgan gets an exasperated look.

Morgan: (on the phone with Garcia) Just leave it alone until I get there. Hey, hey, hardhead. Don't make me spank you when I get back.
Reid: Don't listen to him Garcia, he's all talk. (Morgan smacks Reid's head) Ow! JJ, he just hit me!
JJ: (not looking up) Boys, behave or I will ground you both.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNH-Cqi-dG8&feature=related

Hotch: You told me you were cleared to fly. You lied.
Reid: I am a doctor, so technically it wasn't a lie.
Garcia: What was it then?
Reid: ...A second opinion?
Garcia: You're my bitch now.
Morgan laughs

Garcia: I might be in big trouble.
JJ: (looking at her files, sarcastically) Come on in.
Garcia: I can't believe he showed up at my apartment.
JJ: It's not like I'm doing anything here...
Garcia: We just had a seminar on fraternization last week!
JJ: I really have a lot of work to do, Garcia...
Garcia: So you don't want to hear how Agent Rossi showed up at my door in the middle of the night while I was enjoying a post-coital shower with fellow FBI technical analyst Kevin Lynch?
JJ: (head snaps up) Sit.

Kevin: Agent Rossi we need to talk...about Penelope...man-to-man.
Rossi: Man-to-man?
Morgan: What about Penelope?
JJ: in a sing-song voice Garcia and Kevin sitting in a tree... walks away
Morgan: Get out of here... you serious? walks away
Prentiss: Just when I thought that nothing scandalous was ever going to happen around here.
Reid: What? What does that mean?
Prentiss: Didn't you hear JJ?
Reid: The song meant something? No. No, I missed it!
Prentiss: It... it... it... You know what? Never mind.
YOUTUBE http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlKhqbgEufM reid missed the song

Reid: Collin?
JJ: Cullen. the vampire family from twilight.
Reid: What's Twilight
JJ: do you ever read anything else other than technocul books?
Reid: Not much in english
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgIn55HKVT4&NR=1

Reid: What if he has a twin?
Morgan: Oh Reid, please tell me you're not talking that good twin evil twin stuff?
Reid: No, no... I'm talking evil twin, eviler twin... just think...
(everyone gives Reid a funny look)

(poking Reid gently in the cheek after he has mentioned how it was quicker to solve the Bacon Cipher longhand instead of using a computer)
Emily: He's so lifelike...

Reid: I know what it's like to be afraid of your own mind.

JJ: Susan B. Anthony said, "A woman must not depend on the protection of man, but must be taught to protect herself."

1. Your real name: Jane

2. Your Nobody name (Take all the letters of your first name, mix them around and put an "x" where you think it should go): Exanj

3. Your Gangsta name (the first three letters of your name plus "izzle"): Janizzle

4. Your Detective name (fav. color and fav. animal): Black puppy

5. Your Soap Opera name (your middle name and the street you live on): Ashley riverside

6. Your Star Wars name (first three letters of your last name, first two letters of your first): corja

7. Your Super Hero name (2nd fav color, fav drink): skyblue black pepsi

8. Your Witness Protection name (middle names of your parents): Tissy

9. Your Goth Name (Black plus the name of one of your pets): Black cuddles

10. Your Rapper name (Nick name plus "Flo"): Squishi flo

11. Your Couple Name (The first 3 letters of your Crush and the first 3 Letters of your name): aarjan

12. Your name Drunk (first 3 letters of your firs name, 3 letters of middle and 4 of last ): janashcorn

13.Your Crazy name (the name of your 3 favorite T.V shows with "Crazy" in front of it and "Lady or Man" depending on gender at the end): crazynciscriminalmindshousemdlady

If you have ever given off the allusion of being drunk when you weren't, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room for no reason, put this in your profile.

Put this on your profile if you ever pushed the door that said pull.

If you think iPods are gifts from the gods copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy and paste this in your profile

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in your profile. (NCIS )

Just because we eat animals for food, doesn't mean we can cut them up for clothing! If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, ect, copy this onto your profile.

If you have been on the computer for hours on end reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

If Fanfiction is to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.