IMPORTANT NEWS!!!! I MADE A TWITTER ACCOUNT FOR THE STORY! ITS AT twitter.com/@Bookfreak30987 . go there and see why it's taking me so long to update, and other cool stuff! ...i guess...

my profile pic is the next wolf that is gonna change in my story, Werewolves. This wolf is Leah! :)

Thanks for visiting my page! If you want to know about my writing style:

Ideas will usually just come to me randomly. I will be sitting Spanish class one day, and all of a sudden I get this idea in my head and shout 'eureka!' at the top of my lungs as I jump out of my seat in the middle of the teacher explaining verb changes. This has happened before, sadly. I also always have my best ideas and thoughts in the morning right after I wake up, a frequent cause of me always being late to school. Once I have an idea, I want to start on it right away and finish it before the inspiration is lost. I usually start this act in math class. I don't plan anything out really; once I am started, the thoughts and plots flow through my head instantly. The most I will write down for my stories is the characters schedules and what they are like if I have a lot of details about them to remember. Now, I am also famous for never, ever finishing stories. Like, seriously, I have about 6 stories unfinished in my 'writing' binder and 3 ideas I haven't stared working with yet. It's mostly because I have barely any time, besides math class, but that's only an hour a day, so...yeah. Thats basically my writing in a nutshell. Writing is my life. It is my passion. I want to be a famous author one day, along with being a lawyer and eventually a politician. What I do know, is that, if (when) I ever get famous as a writer, I will thank all of my fanfiction readers and reviewers, the most awesome people in the world. I love you all, and thanks for taking the time to read about me!

Nicknames People Call Me: Chelsea, Chelseah, Chelsifer, Chels, Chelcheez, Cheese

Hair: blond with many different natural highlights (black, brown, even a little red.)

Eyes: left: blue, right: green. I'm not lying, they seriously are different colors.

Age: im in high school.

Town: Arizona

Favorite colors: Purple, red, and blue :)

Pets: My Pomeranian, Wickett :)

Favorite books: Twilight Saga, Gallagher Girls Series, Maximum Ride, House of Night Series, and too many others :)

Favorite authors: Stephenie Meyer, L.J. Smith.

Favorite movies: Twilight, New Moon, ECLIPSE!!!, Transformers 1 and 2, Easy A, Justin Bieber

Favorite tv shows: Criminal Minds, CSI: Miami, NCIS, Pretty Little Liars, American Idol, Say Yes to the Dress, Fashion Police, The Soup, Chelsea Lately, Ghost Adventures

Favorite couples: Edward/Bella. Jasper/Bella (only in fan fiction!). Jacob/Leah (why couldn't it be?), Zach/Cammie, Stark/Zoey

Favorite Girl From Twilight: Bella as a vampire

Favorite Guy From Twilight: EDWARD!! WOO!! then Jasper :)

Favorite Subject (in school): I love reading and writing, but hate Language Arts class. I also really love Spanish.

Favorite Number: 17

Favorite Food: Spaghetti

Favorite Mystical Creature: Werewolves more than Vampires :)

Favorite types of fiction to read: Romance/Supernatural and Romance/Hurt/Comfort

Favorite Quote: When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and watch the world try to figure out how you did it AND I'm an English major, you do the math. :D (this quote cracks me up so much! LOL)

Favorite Bands/Musicians: Justin Bieber and A Day to Remember :)

Pet Peeves: cutting in the lunch line (i know, i know, but i am serious. its annoying), cheaters, and LIARS! I ABSOLUTELY DO NOT LIKE LIARS! UGH!!! okay, i'm good :D

Other activities: reading, writing, reading fanfic, reading stories, Facebook-ing, doing homework, gaming (yes im a girl gamer, got a problem with that?), youtube, the usual teenager crap.

Things for my stories

Werewolves

Siblings:

Leah, Seth, and Bella

Emily and Jacob

Sam

Jared

Paul, Embry, and Quil

Collin and Taylor

Pairings:

Sam and Leah

Jared and Emily

Embry and Taylor

Bella and Jacob

Quil and Macy *random girl*

Paul and Kendra *random girl*

Collin and Sarah *random girl*

Seth and Stacey *random girl*

Bella's Schedule:

1. Physics (Emily, Jared, and Quil)

2. History (Sam and Jacob)

3. English (Taylor, Paul, and Leah)

4. Calculus (Emily and Embry)

5. Gym (All)

Transformation Orders:

Sam

Jacob

Paul

Bella

Quil

Jared

Embry

Taylor

Leah

Seth

Emily

Collin

Fur Color:

Sam-

Jacob-

Paul- http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2168/2398581838_7fb27d567d.jpg?v=0

Jared-

Bella-

Quil-

Embry- http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3561/3449677872_e63218d6e0.jpg

Taylor-

Leah-

Seth-

Emily-

Collin-

Phone Background Quotes

You just have to

live your life

not caring

what they think

and shake off

the drama

and prove to them that

You're better

than they think you are!

I'm selfish, impatient, and a little insecure

I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle

but if you can't handle me at my worst

then you absolutely don't deserve me at my best

Life is too short

to wake up in the morning

with regreats. So, love the

people who treat you right,

forgive the one's who don't,

and believe that everything

happens for a reason.

If you get a chance, take it.

If it changes your life, let it.

Nobody said it'd be easy,

they just promised

it would be worth it.

I believe everything happens

for a reason. people change so

you can learn how to let go.

things go wrong, so that you

appreciate them when they're

right. you believe lies, so you

eventually learn to trust no

one but yourself, and sometimes

good things fall apart so

better things can fall together.

God grant me the serenity

to accept the things

I cannot change,

courage to change things i can,

and wisdom

to know the difference

To my haters:

I keep it real and that's a

promise. i may be whatever you

wanna call me, but i'm honest.

when i walk by, you stop

and stare. well, keep looking

'cause i don't care.

i have my own life and style,

not trying to please you or smile.

when it comes to competition,

you're out. so, shut your hatin' self

and keep me out of your mouth.

Please Note:
CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED
Apparently, you told Santa that you have been good this year.
He died laughing

It is wise to walk a mile in a man's shoes before judging him... That way you're a mile away and you have his shoes.

Heels were invented by a man to make women’s butts look smaller and to make it harder for them to run away.

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

"Never hire a colorblind electrician."

"If you are good you will be assigned all the work. If you are really good you will get out of it."

"A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking."

"Maybe this world is another planet's hell."

"Sometimes you're the windshield, but sometimes you gotta be the bug."

"I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear into my crib."

"Always listen to experts- they'll tell you confidently what can't be done and why. Then go ahead and do it."

"After all is said and done a heck of a lot more is said than done."

"At my lemonade stand I used to give away the first glass for free, and charge five dollars for the refill. It contained the antidote."

"Happiness is your dentist telling you “it won't hurt a bit,” and then he catches his hand in the drill."

"The good news is that you may have screwed up my past and created my present but you have no control over my future."

Let's play truth or dare! Or maybe just dare, because nobody seems to tell the truth anymore.

"In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move."

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive

Everybody is somebody else's weirdo

Live dangerous…Run with scissors.

I’m so clever that sometimes, I don’t even know what I’m saying

Love is like snot. You keep picking at it until you get to it, then you wonder what to do with it.

Being mature is overrated.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I see regular people!

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

Anyone can reach the stars. If you can't reach them, catch one that falls.

Smile... it confuses people. (my motto!)

Labels are for cans, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a can!

Don't yawn in the shower. You might drown. -Bill Cosby

The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

There's a ME in AWESOME but there's also a WE.

I was gifted but the psychiatrist took away my super powers.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up.

Palm Reader: -gasp- "You're going to die. But don't worry, you'll live through it."

Therapist = The/rapist (scary thought -shudder-)

Excuse me. Have you seen my sanity? I think I've lost it...

I used to care, but I take a pill for that now.

I call you squishy and you shall be mine. You will be my squishy! -Dory from Finding Nemo

I can resist anything but temptation.

The best place to hide is in plain sight.

Guys aren't worth your tears.

And God (CARLISLE) said "Let there be Edward,"...and it was goood

I had a friend once. Then the rope broke and he got away.

I like you. When I rule the world, your death shall be quick and painless.

If I asked for your opinion, I'd take the tape off your mouth.

"Just remember, inside every girl, there's a boy. That came out wrong..but you know what I mean." -Paul, Shes the Man

Secret admirers are stalkers with stationary.

"Shut up voices or I'll poke you with a fork."

Do I have to spell it out for you or scream it in your face?!

So what if we act like imature idiots? We're having fun.

Music is my boyfriend.

Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that.

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things.

Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15,Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, chocoholic4eva, xXKatieCullenX, Bby-Leyla-Vamp, Shiny-silver-volvo-stalker, MegTheVampire, Crimson Love20, Scarlet Dawn, Queenoflove, Bealive-Your-Imagination, Lilchany, Bookfreak30987

GIRL COMEBACKS!!

Boy Girl

“Where have you been all my life?”

“Running away from you.”

“Are you an angel from heaven?”

“No, I’m a vampire from hell.”

“Your place or mine?”

“Both, you go to yours, I go to mine.”

“Your feisty, I like that.”

“Your smelly, go away.”

“My dad owns the Café. I could get us really good seats.”

“My dad runs that hospital, and that’s where you’ll be if you keep hitting on me.”

“I have magic fingers. And they love to give massages.”

“I have a high kick. And they love to land on…”

“Where have you been all my life?”

“Hiding from you.”

"Have I seen you somewhere before?"

"Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

“What do you do for a living?”

“I’m a female impersonator.”

“What’s your sign?”

“Do not enter.”
“Your body is like a temple.”
“Sorry, no services today.”
“How do you like your eggs in the morning?”
“Unfertilized.”
“I would go to the end of the world for you.”
“Great, but would you stay there?”
“If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put “u” and “I” together.”
“Really? I would put “f” and “u” together.”
“If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.”
“If I saw you naked, I’d die laughing.”
“Your eyes are amazing.”
“Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.”

Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

Bella Cullen: Luckier That You since 1987

(\)_(/)
(='.'=) This is Bunny.
(")_(") Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination!

What a boyfriend SHOULD do:

When she walks away from you mad, follow her

When she stares at your mouth, kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you, grab her and don’t let go

When she starts cussing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet, she's thinking of how to say I love you.

When she ignores you, give her your attention

When she pulls away, pull her back

When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying, just hold her and don’t say a word

When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared, protect her

When she lays her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her

When she steals your favorite hat, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you, tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn’t answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt, back yourself up

When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand

When she grabs at your hands, hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes, don’t look away until she does

When she misses you, she's hurting inside

When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away

When she says its over, she still wants you to be hers

When she re-post this bulletin, she wants you to read it

Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything

When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go

When she says she's okay, don’t believe it, talk with her, because 10 yrs later she'll remember you

Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her, call her before you sleep and after you wake up

Treat her like she's all that matters to you

Tease her and let her tease you back

Stay up all night with her when she's sick

Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid

Give her the world, let her wear your clothes

When she's bored and sad, hang out with her, let her know she's important

Kiss her in the pouring rain

When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Whose ass am I kicking babe?"

Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,

who calls you back when you hang up on him,

who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.

Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy that kisses your forehead,

who keeps your picture in his wallet,

who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,

who holds your hand in front of all his friends,

who thinks your beautiful without makeup,

one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,

THE one who turns to his friends and says THAT'S HER!

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

(¸.•´ (¸.•´~Pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer~¸.•´) ¸.•)

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile. (What girl doesn't not like Chocolate?)

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying,But at the same time funny, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile (maybe...)

If you are against fur coats, clothing, boots, etc, and the people who kill the animals don't use the meat, copy and paste this into your profile

Drugs are bad news. Spread the word.

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your bio.

Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile.

If you like animals, give one a home if you can. If you already have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this into your profile

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile

If you have ever read a 250 pg + book in less than one day, copy and paste this into your profile

-Stay on the phone with her even if she’s not saying anything
- Always call her when you know somethings wrong
- Pretty and beautiful is soo much better that hot or sexy. they mean more.
- Say you love her more than she could ever love you
- Argue that she is the best ever
- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
- When she says she's ok don’t believe it, talk with her
- Because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
- Treat her like she's all that matters to you
- Tease her and let her tease you back
- Stay up all night with her when she's sick
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid
- Give her the world
- Let her wear your clothes
- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
- Let her know she's important
- Kiss her in the pouring rain
- When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is;"Who's ass am I kicking today baby?"

When she walks away from you mad=== Follow her
When she stare's at your lips=== Kiss her
When she pushes you or hits you=== Grab her and don’t let go
When she start's cursing at you=== Kiss her and tell her you love her
When she's quiet=== Ask her what’s wrong
When she ignore's you=== Give her your attention
When she pulls away== Pull her back
When you see her at her worst=== Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying==Just hold her and don’t say a word
When you see her walking== Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared=== Protect her
When she lays her head on your shoulder=== Tilt her head up and kiss her
When she steal's your favorite hat== Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night
When she teases you=== Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn’t answer for a long time=== reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt== Back yourself up with the TRUTH
When she says that she likes you== she really does more than you could understand
When she grabs at your hands=== Hold hers and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you=== bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret=== keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes=== don’t look away until she does
WHEN SHE MISSES YOU=== SHES HURTING INSIDE
When you break her heart=== the pain NEVER really goes away
When she says its over=== she STILL wants you to be hers

Question: Why are British Guys so hot?

Answer:

(1) The accent.

(2) The looks.

(3) Just because God let it be. (Thank you so much)

FANFICTION: MY ANTI-DRUG. because, who has time for drugs if you're reading and plotting and writing and checking reviews? If this is true for you, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are extremely obsessed with British boys, and their accents, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you tend to laugh your arse off at funny FanFics and everyone thinks you're weird copy and paste this into your profile

If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times where you annoy people just for the fun of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think that Writer's Block blows (sucks), copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever thought about something when you were talking about something else, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you get way to excited for books, movies, etc. to come out, copy this into your profile

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

Write 12 of your Fave Twilight Book characters in whatever order and follow the instructions below:
1. Edward Cullen
2. Jasper Hale
3. Bella Swan
4. Jacob Black
5. Sam Uley
6. Jared
7. Seth Clearwater
8. Paul
9. Embry
10. Emmett Cullen
11. Rosalie Cullen
12. Alice Cullen
1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before? Yes, actually. It was weird...
2) Do you think four is hot? How hot? Well, I am pretty sure Jacob looks pretty good in the series after he becomes a werewolf, but if we're talking about Taylor Lautner...hehe. THEN HE IS TOTALLY ONE OF THE HOTTEST DUDES ON EARTH!
3) What would happen if twelve got eight pregnant? I think it would be reversed, and that would be one screwed up baby...
4) Do you recall any Fics about Nine? Yes, a lot of people like Embry.
5) Would two and six make a good couple? They're not gay!
6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten? Sam and Embry or Sam and Emmett? Well, if I had to choose, definitely Embry and Sam.
7) What would happen if seven walked in on two and twelve in an awkward situation? Seth would be like 'oh, sorry...' and then slowly walk out.

8) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten Fanfic. "When Rosalie turns on Emmett and joins the Volturi after New Moon 10 years later because he was so depressed about Edward leaving Bella, Emmett goes back to Forks to try and gather himself and remember good times. But when he meets Bella again, will things turn out differently?"
9) Is there any such thing as a One/Eight fluff? Edward and Paul? As a slash, I am sure. yuck.
10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort Fic. "Alone together."
11) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted four to go out with one? If I wanted Jacob to go out with Edward? Uh...Edward tricks Jacob into thinking he was going to get Bella, and they go to...negotiate...what? idk. lol.
12) Does anyone on your friends list read three slash? –Bella is a girl.
13) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw eleven? –No one but me likes her!
14) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five? – Jasper, Jacob, Sam? They better not.
15) What might ten scream at a moment of great passion? Emmett would scream a lot of things, maybe 'goal!!!!' lol.

16) If you wrote a song-Fic about eight, what song would you choose? – "Me Against the World" Simple Plan i really dont know.
17) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve Fic, what would the warning be? – oh dear, Edward Jared and Alice? I think we all know what the warning would be ;)
18) What might be a good pick-up line for ten to use on two? –Emmett is using pick up lines on Jazzy? Sweet! "Hey Jazz, wanna go play Halo with me, cuz ur looks will kill." lol i totally just made that up.
19. "(1) and (7) are in a happy relationship until (7) runs off with (4). (1), broken-hearted, has a hot one-night stand with (11) and a brief unhappy affair with (12), then follows the wise advice of (5) and finds true love with (3)" – Edward and Seth are in a happy relationship, until Seth runs off with Jacob. Edward then has a hot one night stand with Rosalie? And a brief unhappy affair with Alice? Then follows the wise advice of Sam and finds true love with Bella? Stephenie Meyer totally should have done that, and called it "Finding Yourself" lol.

You Know You're an Author When:
1. You talk to yourself
2. You've spaced out for more than five minutes
3. You always seem to be typing in your head, and sometimes find yourself doing so on an imaginary keyboard.
4. You don't have a favorite song, you have multiple theme songs!
5. You have read a 250+page book in less than a day
6. In every book/movie/show you have read/viewed, you make up at least three fanfictions about them in your head. (Or actually write them.)
6. Your writing teacher hated you.
6. You failed English class.
7. You didn't notice there were three #6's.

I don't have a single theme song. I have several.
When I Wake Up: Drop the World by Lil Wayne
Getting Ready: You Be the Anchor That Keeps My Feet on the Ground by Mayday Parade
School: Fifteen by Taylor Swift
With My Friends: We R Who We R by Ke$ha
Every Day Life: Fuckin Perfect by P!nk
Odd Moments: Stop and Stare by OneRepublic
When I'm Doing Nothing: Wish You Were Here by Avril Lavigne
Before Bed/Sleeping: Hear Me Now by Hollywood Undead

Did you know...
Kissing is healthy.
Bananas are good for period pain.
It's good to cry.
Chicken soup actually makes you feel better.
94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers.
Lying is actually unhealthy.
You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes.
It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you.
89 percent of guys want you to make the first move.
It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed.
Chocolate will make you feel better.
Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing.
A good friend never judges.
A good foundation will hide a hickeys...not that you have any.
Boys aren't worth your tears.
We all love surprises.
Now...make a wish.
Wish REALLY hard!
WISH WISH WISH!
Your wish has just been received.
Copy and paste into your profile in the next 15 minutes and...your wish will be granted.

"A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking."

"God put me on this Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will never die."

"I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead."

"The only problem with mornings is that they happen too early in the day." --Ask anyone who knows me, this is like my life's complaint!

"Retreating! Hell no, we're just attacking the other direction!"

"Smile; tomorrow will be worse." -- I'm a diehard pessimist. Tomorrow's gonna suck worse so let's make use of this sucky day, right?

"Everytime I hear that dirty word 'exercise' I wash out my mouth with chocolate."

"Best friends,

You fight. I fight.

You hurt. I hurt.

You cry. I cry.

You jump off a bridge; I'll get a paddle boat

save your retarded ass."

When life gives you lemons, make orange juice and then just sit back and smile as the whole world sits there and wonders how you did it."

Organized people are just too lazy to look for things

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you KNOW the voices in your head are real, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think that those stupid kids should just give that idiotic Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile. (they did in the 80's)

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile.

30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're one of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

My best friend is insane. If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, copy this into your profile!

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever forgotten your own name while introducing yourself copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

92 percent American teens would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it's uncool to breathe. Copy this into your profile if you would be in the 8 percent laughing their butts off at the others.

Too many kids and teenagers have smoked or tried marijuana. If you haven't, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! if you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all: -I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumb war with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twlight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Edward Jasper or Emmett is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you fill up the tab separators in your binders with doodles/love notes/confessions of love/any other Twilight related thing you can think of about Twilight or the Twilight characters. Crazy is when you can open up Twilight and know exactly which part you're at by reading one word. Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny. Crazy is when you have OCD (Obsessive Cullen Disorder). Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!". Crazy is when you suddenly start blabbing about gourds and Hero's Water. Crazy is when you start laughing at the term 'cheap plastic' when no one else knows why. Crazy is when you randomly started laughing like a maniac during a test. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!

You know you live in 2010 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitaire with real cards for years

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or my space

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV

6.) Your boss doesn’t even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) and you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

Twelve Favorite Twilight Characters

1. Edward

2. Jasper

3. Emmett

4. Charlie

5. Bella

6. Alice

7. Rosalie

8. Seth

9. Jared

10. Jacob

11. Sam

12. Paul

1. Have you ever read a 6/11 fanfic before? Alice and Sam...no, but I'm sure there are a couple out there.

2. Do you think 4 is hot? For an old guy, he's pretty handsome, I guess.

3. What would happen if 12 got 8 pregnant? Um, Paul got Seth pregnant? Poor kid.

4. Do you recall any fics about 9? Yeah, I've read a few fics about Jared. He's awesome.

5. Would 2 and 6 make a good couple? Well, duh, Jasper and Alice! That's why they are together in the book.

6. 5/9 or 5/10? Oh, Bella and Jared or Bella and Jacob? That's a hard one because I like both of those guys. But since I'm writing a story about Bella and Jacob, I guess 5/10.

7. Make up a Summary for a 3/10 fanfic. When Bella is kidnapped and Edward is to wrapped up in his own sorrows to do anything, Bella's two protectors have to team up and save her before she is killed, or worse...turned into a vampire. I know, awesome, huh? XD

8. Is there anything known as 1/8 fluff? I'm sure Edward and Seth have fluffs.

9. Suggest a title for a 7/12 fanfic. Tough Love.

10. What kind of plot would you come up with if you wanted 4 to beat 1? Charlie would call the cops on Edward and say that he was the one responsible for the Seattle murders, I guess. I really don't know...

11. If you wrote a songfic about 8, what song would you use? I'm just going off a thought here and saying 'New Divide' by Linkin Park? Anyone? Seth is too cool for a songfic anyways.

12. If you wrote a 1/6/12 fic, what would the warning be? VERY AU.

13. What would be a good pick up line for 10 to use on 2? Um, why would Jacob be using a pick up line on Jasper? Maybe, like, 'Can you feel my love for you?' Idk, u know, cuz Jazz can feel feelings...yeah, nevermind...

I don't care what you say! I AM A PIRATE AND THAT'S THAT! (Copy and paste this into your profile if you are a Pirate!)

"A ninja waits until the dead of night, when the enemy sleeps and drops his guard, when his weapons lie forgotten in the stillness of the night, that is the moment for a ninja to strike." Copy and Paste if your a Ninja!

I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do...

If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile.

If you have a scary crush on a book anime or game character copy and post this into your profile

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writitng or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile

Pluto was no longer declared a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was "Too small" and "Off it's orbit" for a couple scientists likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have music in your soul, post this in your profile!

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off. Don't forget to add your name! RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

Too many people are on crack. If you're not, then add this to your and add your name. RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

Too many peope have smoked marijuana. If you haven't, write this to your profile

!eliforp ruoy otni siht etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen,xGabriellaxBoltonx, xEarlySunsetsOverMonroevillex, Smartest Girl In The World, GatorPups95, 'rEd RoSe-StArFiRe-RoSeFiRe', TitanRavenFreak, Bewarethedarkness, Demonchild99, randomlass, lilninjapig, Trickster91, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

If you like to write, copy/paste this into your profile.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

"I'm bringing sexy back..." Copy and paste this into your profile if you never even knew sexy was gone.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason put this on your profile.

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend than copy this to your profile. (You don't know her...but i guess that's a good thing.)

If you have ever seen an adult act like a gangsta or use slang and were freaked out, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like to write, copy/paste this into your profile.

If you think that those stupid kids should just give that poor Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that Captain Jack Sparrow is the BEST CHARACTER IN PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN, copy this and paste it onto your profile!

If you support Captain Jack Saprrow and his Jar of Dirt, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you are Harry Potter obsessed, copy this into you profile and add your name: Ga Nat Nat, Evil Older Sister, Frozenfan, The Choco-Holic, Jade princess 815, plungers-rock-my-socks, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy this into your profile!

If you've actually tried to count how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you aren't me, paste this on your profile.

If you're on the computer, paste this on your profile.

If you have ever choked on air (or any other substance you thought impossible to choke on), copy this in your profile.

If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completely has to have the nick-name 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your ass off

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai, AkatsukiFan, Elmocrazy,XxKimimaro's-little-stalkerxX. SakuraUmeTheDeadSheNinja, Sabaku no Kurai, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

Paste this bunny in your profile to help Bunnies take over the World!

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you've met your near twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile.

If you want to see the world someday, copy and paste this into your profile.

RIP Steve Irwin. Copy and paste this into your profile as a memorium.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you know (a) video game character(s) or video game weapon(s) that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Alice001, Emeraldman, ShadedHope, Orgaization of 13 Ninjas, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampir, Bookfreak30987

If you are one of those weirdos who actually reads these things and puts them in their profile, go get a life.

If you have embarrasing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer

If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.

The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.

Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.

The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh?

Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you can read that please put it in your profile.

If you like copying and pasting things into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to this list 3 days grace, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

If you think you should be able to watch what you want on TV without being called immature, copy and paste this in your profile

Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message into your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile.

If you are a Weasley Twin Worshipper, copy and paste this into your profile.

If, for any particular reason, you have laughed during a movie that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever forgotten your own name while introducing yourself copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you've ever forgotten your own name while introducing yourself copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are bored and like to write stuff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Stereotyping others is just plain wrong. "Muslims are all terrorists!" WRONG. "Americans are all warmongering assholes!" WRONG. "Black people are all gangsters/drug dealers!" WRONG. "Australians ride around in kangaroo pouches!" Now this is just stupid. If you're sick of people judging others because of their race, religion, nationality, or anything else, copy this onto your profile. If you feel like all Dark Jak needed was a hug, copy and paste this to your profile

"REMEMBER WHEN"

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
when )m 0 m( was your hero
and 'D a D' was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

If you forgot your phone number when someone asks for it copy this into your profile.

If you've ever ran into a lamppost or some tall, metal pole that is blatently obvious copy this into your profile

If you're easily confussed or confuzzled add this to you're profile

30 percent of kids go to college. the other 70 percent either drop out or don't have the proper skills to. If you are on of the 30 percent that KNOW that your going to college put this on your profile and add your name to the list. EcoliandDahChihuahua, Gaara's-pandachan101, The Quiet Listener, CrazyGirlOfManyNames, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know theAlphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune

If you actually read all of these! Copy this into your profile!

If you've ever imagined yourself killing off a fictional character so that you could steal her fictional boyfriend, copy this into your profile

If you love Itachi copy and paste this into your profile!

I agree when people say girls rule now and 4ever. Copy & paste this in your profile if you agree

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile

If you almost always have a song stuck in your head, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

90 percent of the teen population has done drugs, smoked or drunk underage. Put this in your profile and add your name to this list if you're one of the lucky godblessed 10 percent who haven't. - Mew Cherry - RandomQueenofMiddleEarth - Jazzy Kat - Breezy411 - RaeVenn-Chan - Fall-For-Deceit, Bookfreak30987

If you are a proud member of the All I Want To Do Is Dance-Dance Revolution, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you should be doing homework right now, copy this into your profile.

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

Is it just me or is Gaara really hot? If you think he is copy this and put it into your profile and add your name to the list.UNITE GAARA LOVERS!! GaaraandAikoforever, LoveShinobi4eva, Silver Element,BlueSkyHeaven, Ketsueki Senshoku, Gaara's Pyro RACCOON, Gaarasminestayaway, .Faking.This.Smile, Lilly, Jay Jay, StormofSilver, inspired122, Kasumi18, X-X-N.H.Y.C.I.S.H-X-X, Millenium Ring, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire

If you've ever misspelled your own name, paste this on your profile

Pyromanic? Put this in your profile.

If you don't use Myspace and are proud enough to make it public, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur pro!

Paste this to your pro if you love Skittles! Taste the rainbow x

If you are against racism, COPY THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE. The only race is humanity.

If people mistake you for being something other than human copy this into your profile.

If you have more fictional boyfriends than real boyfriends, put this in your profile.

If you think that I'm making you think too much then copy and past this into your profile.

If you are like me and think abortions are cruel, wrong, and should be made illegal, copy and past this into your profile. No child deserves to die.

65 percent of teenagers spend more time watching TV rather than reading, if you are part of the 35 percent who read more than watch TV, then copy and paste this into your profile then add your name. RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

If you say 'yeah...' alot, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you absolutly LOVE sleeping, copy this into your profile.

If you HAVE EVER tried to take over the world and not succeeded, then copy and past this to your profile and add your name to the list: Master Of Minds, Breezy411, RaeVenn-Chan, Fall-For-Deceit, Naru-Vampire, Bookfreak30987

If you have your own world, copy and past this to your profile

If you love your MP3 player, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

The bolded ones are me! yay for me! boo for stereotypes!

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS(or about to/want to), so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border

I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. (unfortunately, I am crazy)
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay
I draw ANIME so I MUST be to a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. (I hate hockey, but I love beavers although I've never actually seen one.)
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion (even though I am...)
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.

BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"

FRIENDS: Would read ignore this

When life hands you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.

When life hands you lemons, throw 'em back and demand Edward (or Jasper lol)

If you think that TWILGHT is the best book known to woman (and man)...copy and paste this to your profile.

If you try to control your thoughts because Edward might hear them, copy and paste to your profile.

If you are a walking, talking Twilight series encyclopedia and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have spent a whole day reading Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse, without any food, copy and paste this to your profile.

You know your addiction to Twilight is getting dangerous when you've added "Volturi" to your computer's dictionary. If you have done just that, copy this into your profile.

If you have so many dreams about Twilight that you have lost count, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever burst out laughing about something in a book, and people look at you wierd, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have a tendency to talk/sing to yourself copy and paste this to your profile.

Have you ever tried having a thumb war with yourself?? I have. (I found that I'm a very tough opponent.) If you have just tried having a thumb war with yourself, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you find Spongebob funny SOMETIMES, but most of the time he is SO annoying you want to throw the TV out the window, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you absolutely are TERRIFIED of spiders, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever pulled on a door that said push, or vise versa, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever stayed up past 2 in the morning reading, copy and paste this on your profile. (More like all night! :D)

If random songs pop into your head for no apparent reason, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fan fictions, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think that Writer's Block blows, copy and paste this to your profile.

Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

People say that I'm weird, but I think that weird is strange, and strange is odd, and odd is different, and different is unique, and everyone is unique, so unique is normal, so therefore I am normal. If the same is true for you, copy this onto your profile!

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this to your profile.

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this to your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile XD

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are reading this line, copy and paste it in ur profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are not sure if you find these 'copy and paste things' annoying or if you love them, copy and paste this on your profile.

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Azmanig huh?

You know you're obsessed with Twilight when..

1) You have read Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse at least 3 times.

2) You own all above mentioned books.

3) You know that they're totally going to screw up Twilight the Movie, and
you want to see it anyway.

4) You have read everything on every page of Stephanie Meyers web site.

5) You have reread a lot of these pages.

6) You read fanfiction about Twilight.

7) You write fanfiction about Twilight.

8) At one point or another, you have had a screenname/username that says
something about Twilight or its characters.

9) You constantly count the days until Breaking Dawn comes out.

10) For a long while after you read Twilight/New Moon, you acted as a
missionary for the books, asking everyone you talked to if the had read
them.

11) If said people have not read Twilight, you insist that they read it,
because it is, and I quote, "the best book ever".

12) If anyone says something that goes against the statement that Twilight
is the best book on the planet, you immediately start to argue with them.

13) You stand firm by your belief that anyone who says that Twilight is just a crappy, unrealistic love story(and yes, believe it or not, I do know someone who has said this!) should be taken to the edge of a cliff and pushed off.

14) For months after you read it, Twilight was your favorite subject to talk
about.

15) When you found out you would have to wait until August of 2007 for
Eclipse to come out, you almost cried.(AN: this one kinda depends on when
you read the first two books, I guess!)

16) You argue with your friends over which member of the Cullen family you
like best.

17) You began reading fanfiction as a desperate attempt to read something
about Twilight, when you had already finished the books.

18) No matter how many times you read Twilight or Twilight-related stories,
you never get tired of it.

19) As you read this list, you are smiling and nodding at almost every thing
you read.

20) Even though you know it's impossible, you often wish that you were a
vampire.

21) Vampires are officially your favorite mythical creature ever.

22) Your personal motto is, vampires are cool, not scary.

23) You know that you are not crazy for being obsessed with Twilight; people
who don't understand it just haven't read the book.

24) When you hear that someone read Twilight and didn't like it or thought
it was stupid, you just shake your head and sigh.

26). You literally haunt Stephenie Meyer's website waiting for new information

27). You're driving your parents mad with your crazy countdowns

28). You're keeping track of all the "Breaking Dawn Quotes of the Day" and trying to figure out what they all mean

29). Your home page is Stephenie Meyer's website

30). Your desktop has something to do with the Twilight Series

31). Your screen saver reads "Twilight Movie: November 21"

32). You have both the original New Moon book and the New Moon Special Edition

33). You put your Eclipse poster in plain view so that everyone can see it

34). You can't believe that most people haven't read the books

35). You know all the characters so well that you feel as if you could write your own stories about them

36). You spend most of your day making up "What if...?" questions about all the different plot lines

37). You've actually read the play "Romeo & Juliet" just so you could find out how Jacob would die

38). You know you're addicted, but you don't care

39). You can't help saying, "I can't wait for August 2nd!" while everyone who isn't "in the know" stares at you like you're psyco

40). You're more excited about the release of Eclipse than anything to do with Harry Potter

41). When you found out that Breaking Dawn wasn't coming out until 2008, you have a mental breakdown

42). When you found out about Midnight Sun you had yet another mental breakdown

43.) You ACTUALLY noticed there was no 25.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy an dpaste this to your profile.

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever asked a stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you support the "Make Edward change Bella into a vampire" club, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said "pull" or vise versa, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your profile is this long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you have AACIBD Addicted to All Cullens Including Bella Disorder copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from Twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Jacob should just stay a friend and have a happy ending copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it's NOT even funny anymore, copy and paste this into your profile.

PLEASE DONT READ! I WISHED I HADNT READ!

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her in the ground when she was still alive. The murderer chanted,"Toma sota balcu" as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this in your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

If You Live In America, you post this

Why America has some Issues (Yes I live there, but tough. These are clever)

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'

10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.

Lessons Learned in Twilight:
1. You can enjoy the boquet while resisting the wine.
2. The future is not set in stone.
3. Men are crabby when they're hungry.
4. Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear.
5. True love knows no boundaries.
6. Some people are just danger magnets.
7. Even eternal enemies can work together to save something they love.
8. Forget the fangs - real vampires sparkle!
9. Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10. Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes.
11. Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day.
12. Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13. Family is about more than just blood.
14. What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15. Losing your temper can be hair-raising.
16. "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17. Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18. There are exceptions to every rule.
19. Always verify bad news before doing something stupid.
20. Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21. Love means being willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's.
22. Cold hands = Warm heart.
23. Not breathing is uncomfortable.
24. Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair.
25. Romeo was an idiot.
26. Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27. Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28. Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29. Space heaters can be very annoying.
30. Love can make even the most miserable places paradise.

7 Reasons Not to Mess with Children (small children)

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The te acher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honour" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted,
"Cause your feet ain't empty."

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE . God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

Bella: Do I ever cross your mind?

Edward: No

Bella: Do you like me?

Edward: No

Bella: Do you want me?

Edward: No

Bella: Would you cry if I left?

Edward: No

Bella: Would you live for me?

Edward: No

Bella: Would you do anything for me?

Edward: No

Bella: Choose--me or your life

Edward: My life

Bella runs away in shock and pain and Edward runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life

THE TWILIGHT OATH

I promise to remember Bella
Each time I carelessly fall down
And I promise to remember Edward
When ever I'm out of town
I promise to obey traffic laws
For Charlie's sake of course
And I promise to remember Jacob
When my heart fills with remorse
I promise to remember Carlisle
When ever I am in the Emergency Room
And I promise to remember Emmett
Every time there's a huge boom
I promise to to remember Rosalie
When ever I see something that holds pure beauty
And I promise to remember Alice
When I'm at a mall and a cute outfit spots me
I promise to remember Renesmee
When I see that beautiful bronze hair.
And I promise to remember Esme
When someone tells me they care
I promise to remember Jasper
Whenever my stomach isn't curled
And I promise to remember the Volturi
When someone speaks of dominating the world
Yes I promise to love Twilight
Wherever I may go
So that all may see my obsession
Because I know what the Twilighters know.

25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next
week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your nec k!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don 't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you

Haha.

'Never Argue With A Woman'

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after
several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap.

Although not familiar
with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out.

She motors out a short distance, anchors, puts her feet up, and begins to
read her book. The peace and solitude are magnificent.

Along comes a Fish and Game Warden in his boat.

He pulls up alongside the
woman and says, 'Good morning, Ma'am.

What are you doing?'

'Reading a book,' she replies, (thinking, 'Isn't that obvious?').

'You're in a Restricted Fishing Area,' he informs her.

'I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading.

'Yes, but I see you have all the equipment.

'If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault,' says the woman.

'But I haven't even touched you,' says the Game Warden.

'That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment.

'Have a nice day ma'am,' and he left.

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads.

It's likely she can also think