HI!!! So, a couple things you should know about me:

- I'm a girl

- I'm a nerd (and proud to be one)

- I'm naturally loud

- I don't care what you think about me

- I don't like pointless things

- etc.

So that's the basic stuff. If you don't like me, that's your problem. I hope you like the book I'm going to put here. If you don't, again, that's your problem.

Here are some lists of things that i really like, made, or describe me. Enjoy! (and for the last time, if you don't then that's YOUR problem).

Favorites

Color(s): blue

Place(s): Italy, California, Appalachian Mountains (I have been to all these places)

Food(s): shrimp pasta

Smell(s): pine, snow, rainy sun, and fresh mint (all these things do have a smell)

Song(s): I'm not sure

Animal(s): sea horses, black-chinned fruit dove

Season(s): winter

Book(s): I just like to many

I can't think of anything else at the moment, maybe later.

Really Good Quotes

- "Doing what you like is freedom, liking what you do is happiness."

- "When life hands you lemons, throw them at your enemy and run."

- "It's not the problem that's the problem. It's your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?"

- "I meant to behave, but there were to many other options."

- "People say you can't live without love... I think oxygen is pretty important."

- "Raisin cookies that look like chocolate chip cookies are the main reason i have trust issues."

- "I don't have an attitude problem, i just have a personality you can't handle."

- "Life always offers you a second chance, it's called tomorrow."

- "It's how when I'm loud, people tell me to be quiet and when I'm quiet, people ask me what's wrong."

- "I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours."

- "Stop waiting for Prince Charming to come and just go find him. The idiot might be stuck up in a tree somewhere."

- "I don't like morning people... or mornings... or people."

- "If each day is a gift, I'd like to know where I can return Mondays."

- "You know that tingly funny feeling you get whenever you see the person you like? That's common sense leaving your body."

- "My room is not messy; it's an obstacle course designed to keep me fit."

- "Don't judge me cause I'm quiet. Only idiots plan a murder out loud."

- "Follow your heart. Just make sure to take your brain."

- "Love me or hate me, both are in my favor. If you love me, I'm always in your heart. If you hate me, I'm always in your thoughts."

- "If someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles to frown, but only 4 muscles to punch them."

- "I need a six month vacation. Twice a year."

- "Stressed spelled backwards makes 'desserts'."

- "You say you love rain, yet you use an umbrella to walk under it. You say you love the sun, yet you seek out shade when it shines. You say you love wind, yet you close your window when it blows. So, that's why I'm scared when you say you love me."

10 Things That I Know About You

1. You are reading this
2. You are human
3. You can't say the letter "P" without parting your lips
4. You just attempted to do it
5. You're smiling at this
6. You're wondering what I'm going to say next
7. You didn't realize that I skipped number 6
8. You just checked to see if I'm right
9. You're realized that I was wrong
10. You probably just realized that I did that on purpose

What You Do In Life

Preschool: Sit behind a desk and are told not break anything

School: Told it's a lot harder in high school

High School: Told it's a lot harder in college/university

College/University: Told it's a lot harder in the "real world"

"Real World" Job: Sit behind a desk and don't break anything

There's Something I Want To Tell You

1. I need to tell you a secret, go look at 5
2. The answer is, look at 11
3. Don't get mad, just look at 15
4. Calm down, now at 13
5. First look at 2
6. Don' be that angry, look at 12
7. I just wanted to say, hi
8. What I wanted to say is... THE ANSWER IS ON 14
9. Be patient and look at 4
10. I swear, this is truly the last time, but look at 7
11. I hope your not mad when i say this, look at 6
12. Sorry, look at 8
13. Don't get mad, look at 10
14. I don't know how to say this, but... look at 3
15. You must be really mad by now, look at 9

So True

If you want your favorite song to become your least favorite, just make it your alarm sound.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. (Think about it)

If you've never jumped from one couch to the other to avoid the lava, then you've never had child hood.

If someone calls you a crazy freak, just thank them. Nothing throws people off like a proud, polite, crazy freak.

The world can be amazing when you're slightly strange.

don’t hate you, I just like everything else better.

I'm not accident prone, the world is attacking me!

Never get into an argument with an idiot. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Don’t piss me off. Im running out of places to hide the bodies.

Im not bossy, I just have better ideas.

Heaven doesn't want me and Hell is afraid I'll take over.

You're just jealous coz the voices only talk to me!

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

I'm not smiling at you I'm trying not to laugh!

Anyone who isn't a fan of James Bond is just a communist! Seeing how most of his enemies are.

English who needs that? I'm never going to England!

Who laughs last thinks the slowest.

First law of science: don't spit into the wind.

First law of nature: Don’t eat the yellow snow.

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in your enemies’ eyes!

When Life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice and let Life wonder how the heck you accomplished THAT!

Flirt like a butterfly, sting like a genetically modified, half-shark killer DEATH BEE!

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

I used all my sick days so I called in dead.

Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny

I think the absolute worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of Charades...or during a game of "Fake A Heart Attack"--Someone's Signature (i find this both hysterical and horrifying)

"When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet; when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered-cat-a-ray, we could power entire metropolitan area." --Dunno, found on someone’s bio.

"Two things in the world are indefinite, the universe and people's stupidity. And I'm not sure about the first."--Albert Einstein

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit!

When someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown about it, but it takes only 4 muscles to punch them.

Don't knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run, he hates that.

Suicide is our way of saying to God, "You can't fire me! I quit!"

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

Girls want a lot of things from one guy, yet guys only want one thing from many girls. No wonder so many relationships go up in flames.

Most people are alive because it's illegal to shoot them.

Women go into marriage expecting men to change and they don't. Men go into marriages expecting women to stay the same, but they don't.

Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up.

People like you are the reason there are middle fingers.

A critic is a legless man who teaches running.

Officer, I swear to Drunk I am not God!

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

I love having friends, they do so many things I can laugh at.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people

In a world of pollution, profanity, adolescence, zits, broccoli, racism, ozone depletion, sexism, stupid guys, and PMS, why the heck do people still tell me to have a nice day?

Random Examples of... Something

A father and son go camping on day. They get there late and set up the tent. Then they go inside and fall asleep. A couple hours later, the father wakes the son and asks, "Look up and tell me what you see." The son answers, "I see a million stars." The father asks, "What does that tell you?" The son looks at his father and says, "That there are a million stars in the sky." The father slaps his son's head and says, "No! It means that someone stole our tent!"

A friend wearing black pajamas jumps up and says, "I'm a ninja." The person next to them says, "No your not." The friend turns around and says, "Did you see me just do that?" The person makes a confused face and says, "Do what?" The friend smiles and says, "Exactly."

Once, while my dad was signing something at the bank, he noticed that the pens were tied to the desk. He looked up and asked the clerk, "We trust you with our money, but you don't trust us with your pens.

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em.
If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em.
If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em.
If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em.
If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed.

Friend v.s. Best Friend

A friend will comfort you when he rejects you, Best Friend well go up to him and say "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A friend will be there for you when he dumps you, Best Friend will call him and whisper "Seven days..."

A friend will help you up when you fall, Best Friend will laugh because she tripped me.

A friend helps you find you're prince charming; Best Friend kidnaps him and brings him to you.

A friend gives you there umbrella in the rain; Best Friend takes yours and runs away.

A friend helps you move, Best Friend helps you move the bodies.

A friend well bail you out of jail, Best Friend is sitting next to you saying "That was Awesome!! Let’s do it again!!"

A friend knows a lot of things about you; Best Friend could right a very embarrassing biography of your live.

A friend will teach me how to drive; Best Friend will help me push the car in the lake so I can collect insurance.

A friend will go to the concert with me; Best Friend will help me kidnap the band.

A friend knows all my best stories; Best Friend has lived them with me.

A friend will hide me from the cops; Best Friend is the reason there after me.

A friend hides a smile and helps me up; Best Friend laughs so hard the fall down too.

A friend will let me make a fool of myself in public, Best Friend is making a fool of herself next to me.

A friend won't ask for any food or drink while at you house; Best Friend will open fridge, shift stuff around and take out the last piece of cake.

Friends Fade, Best Friends are forever.

15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
8. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
10. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look
12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream... "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!"
15. Grab a lot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting, "Go, Pikachu, Go!

P.S.

16. Run in wearing a black cape and mask, scream "Robin, to the Batmobile!" then run out superhero arms.

Me and You is Friends

You smile, I smile...

You hurt, I hurt...

You cry, I cry...

You jump off bridge...

I gonna miss your emails