The Timelord Emperess
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Poll: Who is the most evil? Tell me another option through PM. Vote Now!
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Joined 02-06-13, id: 4529477, Profile Updated: 04-26-15
Author has written 2 stories for Doctor Who, and Harry Potter.

I am a fan of Doctor Who, Percy Jackson and the Olympians, Kane Chronicles, Harry Potter. I'm also reading Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. I do like spoilers, but one spoiler I wouldn't want is about my own future. If I tried to change something bad, that might cause it to happen. That's what happened to Chronos! I'm a cat person, but I have a dog (Monty) I love. My dad is allergic but Monty doesn't make his allergies act up. My two cats died years ago (PS: one of them was mean, I don't really miss her, she tried to scratch me all the time). I like stories and books for ideas and humor, not so much romance.


If you can read this message, you are smart because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

If you could read that put it in your profile


Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.
Person #1: Happiness is just around the corner! Person #2: Too bad the world is round!
Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.
It's all a conspiracy. Babies come from robots.
Copy and Paste this onto your profile if you have imaginary friends from all your favorite books
"Diamonds are a girls best friend...because they're sharper than knives."
Please note : Christmas is cancelled - apparently you told Santa you were good this year ... and he died laughing
You see that girl over there? That's my best friend, YOU break her heart... I'LL break YOU.
One day we'll look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Old enough to know better, young enough not to care
I don't obsess! I think intensely!
The only reason I'm here is because heaven wouldn't have me and hell was afraid I'd take over.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. (oops)
If at least once a week, someone misspells or mispronounces your last/first name wrong...copy and paste to your profile
I ran with scissors, and lived!
You know when you say "No offense', you're actually saying, 'I'm going to diss you now...I hope you dont mind".
"Whoever said nothing is impossible, never tried to slam a revolving door,"- Unknown. If you are guilty of doing a British, Irish, Australian, Southern accent or Elvis impression, copy this in your profile!!If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then copy and paste this in your profile.
If you can ace any test without studying, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you can say that you have dreamed about your favorite book, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have asked your teacher if you could move away from the annoying kid that sits next to you, and they said no, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you spend more time doodling in math rather than learning, copy and paste this into your profile


7 Ways to scare your roommates

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon..."

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you're hungry.

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

?!siht daer nac uoY


DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM

ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER

DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT

THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE

GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE

THE MORSE CODE :
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS

SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME

ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY

ELECTION - RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT

SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S

A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE

THE EARTHQUAKES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE

ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE


92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing your head off

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing

OK, so apparently most of the world opposes abortions. So here's my list of true facts about abortions!

First off, abortions get rid of a fetus NOT A LIFE!!! It's not as common as birth control. It's a last resort. In many cases the fetus has already been lost.

Justin Bieber falls off a building. 90% of the girls are crying. 9% are watching while eating popcorn. 1% are pushing Justin off the building. If you are part of that 9 or 1%, copy and paste this into your profile. (Of COURSE I'm the 9%. Heh heh heh...)

If you're a girl who's tired of people assuming that just because you're a girl you love pink and can't fight to save your life, put this into your profile (YES!!!!!!!! FINALLY someone understands!!!!!)

If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists. I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun. I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed. I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat. I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy. I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS. I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist. I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch. I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell. I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell. I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat. I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world. I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals. I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people. I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible. I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay. I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash. I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy. I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem. I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store. I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage. I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore. I'm a DANCER, So I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut. I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs. I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob. I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo. I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend. I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars. I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy. I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore. I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut. I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals. I'm ITALIAN, so I MUST have a "big one". I'm EGYPTIAN, so I MUST be a TERRORIST! I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin. I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life. I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention. I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention. I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual. I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all. I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player. I have big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe. I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer. I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser. I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll. I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi. I hang out with GAYS, so I MUST be GAY TOO. I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT. I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited. I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy. I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy. I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas. Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction. Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude. Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I MUST be violent. I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly. I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid. I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat. I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly. I'm a SKATER so I MUST do weed and steal stuff. I'm a PUNK so I MUST only wear black and date only other punks. I'm ASIAN so I MUST be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7. I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals. I'm MIXED so I MUST be screwed up. I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist. I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork. I'm in ORCHESTRA, so I MUST be Asian. I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA. I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect. I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black. I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil. I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty. I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser. I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control. I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister. I'm on a DANCE team, so I MUST be stupid, stuck up, and a whore. I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive. I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border. I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat. I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon. I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot. I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis. I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay. I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich. I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino. I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party. I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo. I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy. I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone. I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too. I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't. I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social. I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy. I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch. My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills. I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch. I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs. I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser. I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself. I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse. I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I MUST be homosexual. I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak. I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled. I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant. I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep. (Say What?) I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirts. I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo. I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent. I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend. I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers. I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare. I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth. I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE. I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid. I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE (I wish!). I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER! I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth. I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future. I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I MUST be a HOMOPHOBE. I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser. I care about the ENVIRONMENT so I MUST be a tree hugging hippy. I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex. I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins. I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan. I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion. I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian. I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see. I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE. I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER. I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED. I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST. I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick. I love SLASH, so I MUST be GAY. I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELLED. I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast. I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish. I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE. I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard. I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean. I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid. I'm AUSTRALIAN so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s. I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times. I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around. I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST beLesbian. I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting. I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak. I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life. I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too. I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp. I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist. I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake. I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems. I like FIRE so I MUST be an arsonist. I'm a CUTTER so I MUST want to commit SUICIDE. I have been to THERAPY so I MUST be crazy. I have been ABUSED, so I MUST be an abuser

I'm not perfect. Haters make me seem even more imperfect, finding all of the bad in me and not the good. They stereotype me, and bully me. Shoving me into a hole and lowering my self-esteem. Call me names, and phsically hurt me. Every insult brings me a step closer to commiting suicide. By the time your done reading this, two people have killed themselves because of haters or bullies. Please, don't just stand there. Help someone and Defeat the Label.

Repost this if you are against bullying and stereotyping

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APOLLO! by TailsDoll13 reviews
After Apollo tries out a new spell-it backfires BTW-the demigods, Tyson, Ella, and a few others are stuck having to babysit their parents! Will they survive? This a joint story between me and MrsEDarcy. We're in the story ourselves, too. Not your typical Gods-turned-into-babies story. Random cover pic. Humor guranteed, or your money back! Note: Refunds not available. Shazer, OUT!
Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rated: T - English - Humor/Family - Chapters: 33 - Words: 41,402 - Reviews: 361 - Favs: 77 - Follows: 93 - Updated: 10/14/2014 - Published: 1/1/2013 - Nico A., Will S.
Harry Potter II: Facebook News Feed Edition by BurstAndBloom91 reviews
Chamber of Secrets, Facebook News Feed Style!
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 80,249 - Reviews: 82 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 59 - Updated: 3/13/2011 - Published: 12/13/2010
Year Three at Warner Brothers by obsessmuch reviews
A.k.a. Hermione Granger and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Extracs the urine from the PoA movie. Total Crack and utterly obscene content.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 14,160 - Reviews: 49 - Favs: 63 - Follows: 8 - Published: 10/15/2008 - Hermione G., Ron W. - Complete
Baby Got Brains by Terra3 reviews
A song parody to Sir MixALot's Baby Got Back. Ron sings about why he likes the brainy Hermione.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 901 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 1 - Published: 7/20/2003 - Ron W., Hermione G. - Complete
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Adeline
Adeline Mullon is a girl who gets her letter to Hogwarts. Yea, whatever. But Hogwarts is NOT how her mother remembers it. It's worse, better, and more exiting. Revisit the 7 years at Hogwarts from the eyes of another.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Fantasy - Chapters: 4 - Words: 588 - Favs: 1 - Updated: 4/30/2015 - Published: 1/19/2015
True, and False reviews
This is a story in which I tell a true beginning (things that really happened to me) and a fictional ending. Rated T for chapter 2.
Doctor Who - Rated: T - English - Mystery - Chapters: 2 - Words: 368 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 1/6/2015 - Published: 5/13/2013 - Complete