![]() Author has written 3 stories for Mortal Instruments, and Hetalia - Axis Powers. I'm insane and proud of it! Like one of my favorite quotes: I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it! (I even have it taped to my door!) 92 percent of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Repost this if you are one of the 8 who would be laughing your rear off If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile :...that has happened to me so many times I've lost count 16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, 9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here! 16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!" 16 ways to maintain a Healthy level of insanity. 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars, see if they slow down. 2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice. 3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 4. Put a garbage can on your desk and label it “IN” 5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone is over their Caffeine addictions, switch to express o. 6. Finish all your sentences with “In Accordance to the Prophecy”. 7.Don’t use any punctuation. 8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk. 9. Specify that your drive thru order is “To Go” 10. Sing Along at the Opera 11. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme. 12. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day. 13. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I WON I WON!!” 14. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!” 15. Tell your children over diner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.” 16. Send this to your friends to make them smile, It’s called therapy. Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’. Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever. Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while. Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her. Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’. Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy. Draco Malfoy … disagrees. Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand. Ron Weasley … is very afraid. Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much. Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat. Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out. George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry. Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter. James Potter … doesn’t believe her. Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’. Sirius Black … killed by drapery. Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences. Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane. Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush. Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’. Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence. Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff. Slytherins … will push someone else off. Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase. Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet. |
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