Edward Cullen may have cold hands, but he's got a warm heart... So shut up all you fruitcakes who claim he's a fairy because he lives in the woods, flies from tree-to-tree, and sparkles in sunlight.

Even if he WAS a fairy, he'd still be the sexiest fairy in existence!

Is there like a male word for fairy? You know, like merman or warlock? Okay, never mind, that was really random, wasn't it?

Since I'm too lazy to hit the backspace key, just pretend you never read that last part. M'kay?

Ha! Hahahaaahahahaha!!

Did it work? Did I make you forget how incredibly abnormal I am? No? Damn...