Date of birth: Feb. 15 1985

Sex:Male

Name: If you knew me then you would know me

Favorite animal: Dragons and outher reptiles

love to read. like to play.

would love to have the Shinju Eyes

Elseworlds: In Elseworlds, heroes are taken from their usual settings and put into strange times and places. Some that have existed, some that might have existed, others that can't couldn't, or shouldn't exist. The end result is heroes that seem as familiar as yesterday are as fresh as tomorrow.

Quotes:

"Maybe, but few can say they tricked the Daimakaichō of hell? Plus this means my son is guaranteed a happy life..."Kushina giggled out. Oh My Ninja God!

"It all depends on them lad. I can fix ignorant, and I can handle dim-witted, but there's some village fools too stupid to cure, if you catch my drift, lad," Mr. Fetish

Ranma's Magic Hentai Shop: Getting A Home Visit From The Boss, And Akane Gets Her Temper Put On Ice. [Episode 207802]

"Hello! I am Sirizael and I'll be your banshee for the duration of the stay. Endless grief-stricken moaning begins at nine, chain-rattling at ten and lots of violent dwarven curses while I vainly attempt to get drunk will last from midnight to two. Is there anything I can do for you until then? Random partial manifestations? Demon dog shapechanging? Death portents?"

Tiger Stripes: Something Scary this Way Comes... [Episode 7436]

"And Lee, if you ever wake me up again and the hokage isn't summoning me, the village isn't under attack, or there is not a harem of bikini wearing women dancing down main street covered in tanning oil, I swear I am going to cut you into so many pieces your gonna make humpty dumpty look lucky. Do you understand?" Naruto Shadow Gale

"So Saintan walks into a bar." Hannibal Smith. The A-TEAM

"There is my God, Mr. Riddic." the holy man. Pitch black

"Nobody move, or I'll scrape off all her make-up! This could take a relly long time." Becka. Tank Girl

"Do you have an impackt drill?" Andrew Martin Bicenteneal man

10 rules of living with a dragon.

Do not disturb a sleeping dragon. If you have to, do it from way way over there away from the tail.Emotions run stronger in a dragon, they are elemental beings after all. Do not infuriate a red dragon unless you're fond of smelling like charcoal.If you think you might get airsick, do not ride a dragon.If you ride a dragon and do get airsick, absolutely positively do not get airsick on the dragon.Dragons have some catlike qualities such as taking naps, sharpening their claws, and eating stray animals that annoy them.Dragons can eat almost anything without harm. If you attempt to hit one with your bookbag, accept that it may eat your bookbag including the homework.As Akane can attest, trying to give the excuse that your dragon houseguest ate your homework is not going to score points with the teacher.Trying to get a dragon to go into the Nekoken is something to file under Very Very Bad Ideas.Fire breathing dragons can control their flame so as not to burn down buildings that they are in. Having fire extinguishers around until they learn how to do this is filed under Very Good If Belated Ideas.Catching a dragon by the tail means the end with all the teeth can reach you.

10 More Rules To Keep In Mind Around Dragons.

Do not startle a dragon, for you live in a flammable environment.Do not annoy dragons, for you are crunchy and good with catsup.Do not try to forcefeed a fire breathing dragon a lot of water in an effort to put out its pilot light. Dragons do not have pilot lights. See also rule #2 and #4.Do not make a dragon throw up, for it is more disgusting than you'd care to experience.Do not try to intimidate a dragon, it rarely works and see also Rule #2.Do not tell a dragon to piss off. He might take you up on it and that stuff will eat through leather.Do not sic small animals like lions or tigers or bears on a dragon. At least if you're at all fond of the small animal in question.Do not tell a dragon you're going to take him to a vet and have him spayed or neutered. See Rules #1 and #2.Where does a dragon sleep? Wherever he wants to.What does a dragon eat? What don't they eat is the better question.

You Say Pink I Say Black
You Say Miley Cyrus I Say SHE SUCKS!
You Say Zac Efron I Say WTF!
You Say Pop I Say Rock
You Say I'm Weird I Say I'm Different XP
PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE IF YOU AGREE

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile

OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been
with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth
records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing
when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't
always fair; and Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than
you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing
regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using
mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student,
only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that
they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It
declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to
administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform
parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband;
churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their
victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar
in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize
that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and
was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife,
Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To
Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized
he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the
majority and do nothing.

RIP We shall remember

FAKE VS. REAL

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we really messed up … but that sure was fun!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.

REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this.

REAL FRIENDS: Will repost it

If you are a nutjob, copy and paste this onto your profile, then put something totally random next to it. LEGOS WILL RULE THE WORLD! I AM EBIL! THIS IS NOT TYPO! PINEAPPLES!

I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.

SPLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.

If you think the Coca-coca Puff Turky Bird thing shoud go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

Can you raed tihs? Olny srmat poelpe can. I cdnuol't blveiee taht I cluod aulactly uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rsceearch at Cmabridge Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. If you can raed tihs, cpoy and ptsae tihs itno yuor pofirle!

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever felt the undenilable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not, copy this into your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you are really random put this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica(real name)(i always change my penname)(tehehehe) PurpleBunniesWillRuleTheWorld, Roxxi-and-Ali, IsabellaMarieSwan123, EmmettCullenFan, Bella Masen Cullen, Me Love Edward Cullyou, SilverMoonArcher,forbiddenkitsunegoddess13, Howl To The Moon, adlex47, StCC, gryphonsson,bookwyrm666

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

You know you live in 2011 when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they don't have a screenname or myspace.

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job...

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Ways to Annoy people at the cinema:

Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"

Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.

Clap when the good guy gets killed.

During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"

Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"

Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.

Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.

Yell out what is going to happen.

Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.

Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.

Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.

Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.

Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.

Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.

Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.

Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)

Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.

Try to start a wave.

Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.

Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.

Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"

Sing with the theme music.

Bring and use your own air freshener.

At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."

Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.

Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.

Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.

Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"

Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.

Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.

Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.

When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"

Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.

Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"

Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.

Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.

Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"

Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.

Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.

Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.

Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.

Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room.

Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.

Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"

Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"

Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"

Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer's name is going to be said.

Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.

Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.

Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.

Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end

Try to Read This

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty

uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal

pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a

rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't

mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the

olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer

be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl

mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.

Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed

ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling

was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!

Her name was Auroura

She was only five

This is what happened

When she was alive

Her dad was a drunk

Her mom was an addict

Her parents kept her

Locked in an attic

Her only friend was a little toy bear

It was old and worn out

And had patches of hair

She always talked to it

When no one's around

She lays there and hugs it

Not a peep of sound

Until her parents

unlock the door

Some more and more pain

She'll have to endure

A bruise on her leg

A scar on her face

Why would she be

In such a horrible place?

But she grabs her bear

And softly cry's

She loves her parents

But they want her to die

She sits in the corner

Quiet but thinking," God, why? Why is

My life always sinking?"

Such a bad life

For a sad little kid

She'd get beaten and beaten

For anything she did

Then one night

Her mom came home high

The poor child was hit and slapped

As hours went by

Then her mom suddenly

Grabbed for a blade

It was sharp and pointy

One that she made

She thrust the blade

Right in her chest,

" You deserve to die

You worthless pest! "

The mom walked out

Leaving the girl slowly dying

She grabbed her bear

And again started crying

Police showed up

At the small little house

They quickly barged in

Everything was as quiet as a mouse

One officer slowly

Opened a door

To find the sad little girl

Lying on the floor

It must have been bad

To go through so much harm

But at least she died

With her best friend in her arms

If you hate child abuse then repost this on your profile. If you don't then you have no soul!!

Rules I like to Try and Live by:

Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.

Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes!

Some days you’re the bug; some days you’re the windshield.

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.

If it looks too good to be true, it’s best to shoot it, just in case.

In love and war, when you drop your guard is ALWAYS when you get your ass kicked.

At any emergency scene, find the biggest badass there and stay at least as far away from the fire/hazard/explosives/wild animal as he is.

When in doubt about how to deal with a situation, always choose love and understanding. When that won’t work, try violence.

People don’t listen to you 90 percent of the time anyway. The less you talk, the more weight your words will carry when you do.

Pizza is the universal comfort food. Don’t trust people who don’t like pizza.

"It's a thing," is always an adequate answer to the question, "Why do you do that?"

When someone’s return text word-count average drops consistently below four, stop texting. They don’t want to talk to you.

If someone won’t tell you to your face that they’re mad, then you have the right not to give a damn about whatever their beef is.

You're only as old as people guess you are.

It's better to have a gun and not need it than to need a gun and not have it.

I have this little policy about honesty and ass-kicking... if you ask for it, I have to let you have it.

And now a sad poem.

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge .

Mommy, I was a good , I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now,

And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big , I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo

I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late,

Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I to cancel the date.

I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech
Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

Its ok to cry, I cried, so can you

If you almost cryed while you read this copy this to your profile, and add your name to the list; Mysterious Miracle, Ghostkit, Mist Lionshade, SkelexTheDarkAvenger, MischievousWolfofTwilight, Silver Winged Ninja Seraphim , Kamon Peach Fox, H-bomber, BookWurm666,

THE WE LOVE SASUKE-BASHING CLUB: If you hate Sasuke from NARUTO and love making him suffer, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list: Kinomi-chan, EstherAngelofDeath, 9shadowcat9, AkatsukiMascot, VampireArgonian92, Kanervdss, Shinonigga, GravityTheWizard, ThymistaclesTenshi Namikaze, Boy of Anime,TUAOA:MORRISTOFOX, nepo92,bookwyrm666

If you support the Yaoi/Yuri filter for the story search engine, paste this into your profile!

The Situation in Hell

The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I go out with you", and take into account the fact that I went out with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct . . . leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A."

My Patronus is a Dolphin

Your patronus takes the form of a Dolphin. A dolphin is both very playful and friendly. Like a dolphin, you are joyful, intelligent, and very funny. You enjoy life, and like to help others. You have so many happy thoughts that you can easily perform the patronus charm. Casting the charm becomes somewhat more difficult during a battle, but your concern for your friends helps you keep your focus.

I hate stereotyping.Mine are bolded:

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm SANDY BLOND, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I A GOOD STUDENT, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll..
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm OF IRISH DESCENDANTS, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be a loner
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil
I'm white so I MUST carry white out for emo cuts
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSS DRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST. (I REALLY hate our gov, but i love America)
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be an OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I CURSE a lot, so I MUST be a rebel.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a nerd.
I'm a TOMBOY, so I MUST be lesbian.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I'm a TOMBOY, so I MUST have no female friends.
I don't have many FRIENDS, so I MUST be unpopular
I am AGGRESSIVE WHEN I’M ON MY PERIOD, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST love pink
I write Fanfics, so I MUST be a freak
I wear BRACES, so I MUST be a nerd
I like WEBKINZ, so I MUST be childish
I like the JONAS BROTHERS, so I MUST have bad taste in music
I like DISNEY singers and shows, so I MUST be childish
I’m CONFUSED ABOUT WHAT MY RELIGION IS AT THE MOMENT, so I MUST be misguided.
I GREW UP PLAYING WITH TOY CARS AND LEGO, so I MUST be a guy.
My FAVORITE COLOUR IS BLUE, so I MUST be a guy.
I LOVE BLOWING BUBBLES BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME SMILE AND REMIND ME OF BETTER TIMES, so I MUST be childish.
I LIKE BOYS AND GIRLS, so I MUST not be Christian.
I LOVE SLASH, so I MUST be perverted.
I LIKE GETTING LOST IN A BOOK, so I MUST be a loner.
I’m NOT EMO, OR GOTH, OR GANGSTER, OR A SKATER, OR A PREP, why can’t I just be me? Labels suck.
I’m NOT AFRAID TO STAND UP FOR WHAT I BELIEVE IN, so I MUST be an annoying person who tries to shove my beliefs down your throat.
I HAVE BEEN BULLIED, so I MUST be a weak person.
I DON’T TRY TO BE PART OF THE CROWD, so I MUST be a loner.
When GIVEN THE CHOICE BETWEEN MY FRIENDS OR THE “IN” CROWD I CHOSE MY FRIENDS, so I MUST be stupid.
I PROCRASTINATE, so I MUST be lazy.
I CHEERED WHEN DUMBLEDORE DIED, so I MUST be cold hearted (even though he was a manipulative berk)
I WISH I COULD HUG SEVERUS SNAPE, so I MUST be suicicidal.(He'd Avada you so fast but it'd so be worth it... I love me some sevvy:D)

I am autistic, So I must be stupid.

I am a state worker, so I must be corupt.

If you hate stereotypes and think people should just shut up and stop, add one and POST THIS!

Even when you cant see Him, God is there. If you believe in God put this in your profile.

At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
it all over his lap.

When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
by never even bothering to practice.

When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by
jumping out of the car and never looking back.

When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.

When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.

When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion.
You thanked him by telling him he had no taste.

When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.

When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.

When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
thanked him by taking it every chance you could.

When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
by being on the phone all night.

When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
him by staying out partying until dawn.

When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.

When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
how deeply he loved you. You thanked him by moving halfway across the
country.

When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You
thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their
children.

And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, post this on your profile

PLEASE READ.

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.

The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."

His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"

Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''

"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''

"My mommy loves white roses."

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.

I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.

The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away.

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices:

1) Repost this message.

2) Ignore it as if it never touched your heart

Very true..

FREE TO A GOOD HOME: 2 year old child. Genuine reason, I've just got a new puppy so no longer have the time for the child. Also worried the child may bite the puppy. Child currently kept in a crate. Needs home by tomorrow or it'll be put to sleep. Thanks. YOU WOULDN'T DO THIS TO A CHILD SO WHY DO U SEE IT AS ACCEPTABLE TO DO IT TO A DOG? If you can't dedicate 10yrs to a dog, don't get one!! copy and paste if you agree!

Hue, A friend of mine in England, sent this to me and I thought it was very true - if you agree pass it along.

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'

You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World,Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"

You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west Philadelphia born and raised . . ."

You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

You remember reading "Goosebumps"

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.

You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not

If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.

When everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.

You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.

"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.

Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.

You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genesis became popular.

You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.

You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"

You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.

You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.

You remember those Where's Waldo books.

You remember eating Warheads.

You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.

You remember Ring Pops.

You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.

If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"

When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.

You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.

Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.

You played and/or collected "Pogs"

You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere. . . .

Furbies

Saved By The Bell was the coolest show ever!

You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.

And Windows 95 was the best.

You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.

Michael Jordan was a king.

YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!

All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.

You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.

You collected those Beanie Babies.

Mortal Kombat was awesome--the game and the movie

Carebears

Gak was the coolest stuff invented.

Lambchop's song never ended.

The old dollar bills.

Silver dollars, which were cool to have.

You remember a time before the WB.

You collected all the Troll dolls

You had to read Weekly Reader's in class.

If you even know what an original walkman is.

You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.

You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

You know the Macarena by heart.

"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said

You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"

You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!

You remember Highlight's magazine.

You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.

You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.

Before the MySpace frenzy . . .

Before the Internet & text messaging . . .

Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .

Before MIKE JONES . . .

Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .

Before Spongebob . . .

Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.

When light up sneakers were cool.

When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.

When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.

When we recorded stuff on VCRs.

When we called the radio station to request songs to hear off of our walkmans.

When gameboy was a brick.

You did MASH to figure out your future

When you weren't cool unless you had a Starter jacket.

Way back.

Before we realized all this would eventually disappear. Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much! Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . . or if you smiled at one of these things. Don't forget your User name. Magic Basher54986,BookWyrm666

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around and stood up.

He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

(In my mind I was thinking BURN!)

1. My mother taught me CONSIDERATION.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished
cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of
next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the
store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught t me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't
have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION .
"Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING.
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that
way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Plain Awesome Quotes

Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? I just want to know who the hell is drinking my damn soda.

I dream of a better world...where chickens can cross roads without having their morals questioned.

Practice makes perfect, but nobody's perfect, so why practice?

When angry, count to ten. When very angry, swear.

Education is important; school however, is another matter.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

Isn't it ironic . . . we ignore those who adore us, adore those who ignore us, hurt those who love us, and love those who hurt us.

Don't follow in my footsteps . . . I run into walls.

No, I won't go to hell! It has a restraining order against me.

I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

Don't fall for someone unless they're willing to catch you.

Heaven doesn't want me and hell is afraid I'll take over.

Sometimes, people just build walls up not to keep others out, but to see who cares enough to break through.

The cracks in the cement are a reminder that no matter how strong you may be, you can break.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Don't hate yourself in the morning-sleep till noon.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with "Quit while you're ahead"?

The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples from the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think something is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree. All girls copy and paste

Can't spell EXECUTE without CUTE!!

There's no SLAUGHTER without LAUGHTER. No, seriously if the killer laughs its called slaughter. If the killer doesn't laugh its a massacre.

If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile (EVIL MOSQUITOES)

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you have ever burst out laughing in a serious room or in a quiet room, copy this into your profile

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both..copy and paste this on your profile.

26 THINGS I MUST NOT DO AT HOGWARTS AGAIN:

1. I will NOT sing “We’re off to see The Wizard” when I am sent to the headmasters office.

2. Dobby is NOT Yoda is disguise.

3. He is NOT Gollum either.

4. I will NOT bring a magic-8-ball to Divination Class.

5. My homework was NOT eaten by a werewolf. Especially when my teacher is Professor Lupin.

6. I will NOT tell the first years to make a tree-house in the Whomping Willow.

7. I will NOT give Lupin a flea collar.

8. Nor will I leave dog-biscuits on his desk.

9. If a classmate falls asleep I will NOT take advantage of this and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

10. Starting a betting-pool on the fate of this year’s Defence against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky. It is NOT a clever money-making concept.

11. I do NOT have a Dalek Patronus.

12. I will NOT teach House-Elves to impersonate Jar-Jar Binks.

13. Shouting “To Infinity and Beyond!” was only funny the first time I took off on a broom.

14. I will NOT refer to the summoning charm (Accio) as “The Force”.

15. “Springtime for Voldemort” is NOT an appropriate title for the school production.

16. I will NOT greet Prof. McGonagall with “What’s new Pussy-cat?”.

17. I will NOT send shampoo to Snape’s office, no matter how badly he needs it.

18. "Potter 6, Voldemort 0" is not a valid T-shirt slogan.

19. Even though they are easier to use and probably more effective, I will not use guns against the Death Eaters.

20. I will not charm Firenze pink and call him "My Little Pony."

21. No matter how funny it is I will NOT leave kitty litter in Prof. McGonagall’s office.

22. I will NOT dress up as Lord Voldemort for Halloween.

23. I will NOT ask Harry Potter if his “Scar-Senses” are tingling.

24. I will NOT call Dumbledore Santa Claus. Even if it is Christmas.

25. I will NOT tell Voldemort to “Get a life”.

26.I will NOT tell Draco Malfoy to 'make like a ferret and bounce'

Tell the truth and run.

Smile! It makes them wonder what you're up to.

Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate.

Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.

Generally, generalizations are wrong.

Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make ye mad.

All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.

If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research.

Life is like a box of chocolates - it's full of nuts.

The Truth is out there. So what are you doing here?

If you can't beat them, join them. Then take over.

Better yet, if you can't beat them at their own game, beat them with a stick instead.

Whatever you are, be a good one.

You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist.

You can never underestimate the stupidity of the general public.

Freedom is the right to be wrong, not the right to do wrong.

If you try to fail and succeed, what have you done?

Enjoy every minute of life. There's plenty of time to be dead.

And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count, it's the life in your years.

We don't live in the world of reality, we live in the world of how we percieve reality.

If God had intended Man to smoke, he would have set him on fire.

A single death is a tragedy. A million deaths is a statistic.

Have the courage to live. Anyone can die.

When a finger points at the moon, the imbecile looks at the finger.

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to change it every 2 months.

"He handed her 11 red roses and one fake rose, he said ‘I will love you until the last rose dies."

"Of all the things I’ve lost… I miss my mind the most."

"Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas."

"Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!"

"When in doubt, push random buttons!"

"IF YOU CANT DO IT WITH ONE BULLET DONT DO IT AT ALL"

"When you talk to God, that's religion. When God talks to you, that's psychotic."

"Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies."

"MENtal anxiety, MENtal breakdown, MENstrual cramps, MENopause... Did you ever notice how all of out problems begin with MEN?"

"Doctors say I have multiple personalties. We disagree with that."

"It doesnt matter whether the glass is half empty or half full,just drink it and get it over with."

"I'm not afraid of Death.What's he gonna do, kill me?"

"Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery."

"Firefighter: At one point we decided to fight fire with fire... Well...basically... your house burned even faster."

"I’m not paranoid… WHICH ONE OF MY ENEMIES TOLD YOU THIS?!"

"Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that."

"Whose sick joke was it for the fear of long words to be called hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia?"

"You know it’s going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor."

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired ?.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

" To start press ANY key, where's the Any key ?"

Dont worry about death, the most warning any of us get is; "Mind the Bus!" "What bus?" SPLAT!

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

God created whiskey to keep the irish from conquering the world.

If you're lucky enough to be Irish, then you're lucky enough

Both your friend and your enemy think you will never die

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventilated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile

If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!

If you avoid teen fads and don't live your life according to others copy and paste this.

If you've ever threatened a computer or video game console, copy and paste this into your profile.

I once read that only math can save us now. Put this in your profile if you're screwed.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy/paste this into your profile.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have EVER yelled at a TV after getting frustrated at someone who can't hear you, put this on your profile.

If you have ever considered going to the dark side since they have cookies, copy this onto your profile.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room for no reason copy this into your profile

If with no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, copy this into your profile.

Insanity is defined as doing the same things over and over again and expecting different results. If you're insane, copy this onto your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you just what you find so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour long sob-fest, then start singing and dancing when your favorite song plays. Crazy is when you do or say a totally random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or start having a thumbwar with yourself . So if you're crazy, copy this onto your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune.

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man buried her when she was still alive. The murderer chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read the chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiilling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile.

I'm the kind of person who walks into a door and apologizes.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just one review, paste this into your profile.

If you have ever stared at a computer screen for hours and hours reading stories that people who have no lives whatsoever and have enough obsession with something to write a story about it have written, and you are one of the aforementioned people, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could have clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you're easily confused or confuzzled add this to you're profile

If you want to learn Japanese, copy/paste this into your profile

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile.

If there are times when you just wanna annoy people for the heck of it then copy this into ya profile.

If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you are obsessed with something considered childish for someone your age, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever sat in a class and poked the person in front of you just for fun, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head on a table for no reason copy and paste this onto your profile

If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this into your profile.

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile.

If you have ever been hit by a parked car copy and paste this into your profile.

If your right mind has ever had a fight with ur left mind copy it into your profile.

If you listen to and talk back to the voices in your head and find nothing wrong with it because you know they're there, put this in your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was

born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When

I die I

'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you

go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?"

The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...

Post this on your profile if you hate racism

Dear Bullies, That boy you punched in the hall today; committed suicide a few minutes ago. That girl you called a slut in class today; she's a virgin. That boy you called lame; has to work every night to support his family. That girl you pushed down the other day; is already being abused at home. You think you know them. Guess what, you don't. Copy and Paste this to your profile if you are against the mean bullying. I bet 99% of you won't.

The girl you just called fat? She is over-dosing on diet pills.
The girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting makeup on, hoping people will like her.
The boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home.
That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying.

Put this on your profile if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you won't do.