Naruto is one of the most talented shinobi to have ever graced the ninja world in the past five hundred years. Sadly, he uses his brilliance to get out of work rather than do it himself. Too bad having a fox in your gut complicates things... AU. Mysteries abound. "Suspension of Disbelief" required because of absurdity.

Not every idea Orochimaru ever had was bad. When one of his mothballed programs gets refreshed by the Third how will the world change for Team 7 when they are given brutally honest evaluations of their skills, personalities and potentials. With this knowledge laid bare before them and their Sensei what do they do and how to they grow. STRAIGHT/NON-YAOI