Hey peeps, I am re-posting this from Doctor Legolas' profile. You should check it out. It's hilarious. (I changed part of the Friends section)

Friends

FRIENDS: Lends you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and says "RUN BITCH, RUN!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves, and are the reason you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents, by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents, DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying "DAMN, THAT WAS AWESOME!!!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "That was yours? My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say, "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you. BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and slap him in face.

FRIENDS: Will tell you that you're a great singer even if you're terrible. BEST FRIENDS: Will tell you that you suck.

FRIENDS: Will ask why you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Will already have a shovel to bury the loser that made you cry.

FRIENDS: Will help you when you fall. BEST FRIENDS: Will be laughing so hard at you they fall too.

FRIENDS: Say, "Wow, you're so pretty." BEST FRIENDS: Would pretend someone called them and say, "It was Shrek. He wants his face back."

FRIENDS: Will say, "There, there." BEST FRIENDS: Smack you in the head with a newspaper, yelling, "Pull yourself together!"

FRIENDS: Are around for a while. BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

If you can raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can. I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! Paste this to your profile if you can read this

4 ways to be KICKED out of a supermarket: HILARIOUS !!

#1: If you can, write "I see dead people..." on the typewriters.

#2: Unwrap all the chocolate bars saying, "I've got to find that golden ticket.."

#3: Put a Dora The Explorer doll in the middle of the store and if someone tries to pick it up, jump out and say, "SWIPER NO SWIPING!"

#4: Throw skittles to people shouting, "TASTE THE RAINBOW".

7 Ways to scare your roommate:

7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon..."

6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.

5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.

4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.

3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.

2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"

1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."

25 Things my mother taught me.

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, for when you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

A girl died in 1933. A man buried her while she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota Balcu," as he buried her. Now that you have read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded.

PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE- if you have ever listened to music in another language, and sung along having no IDEA what they are SAYING and PROUD OF IT

Me: *cough* *cough* Italian Opera

Hunger Games Survey (found on The Free Mockingjay's profile page) P.S. Sorry if there are any spoilers.

1. Which book was the best out of the hunger games series?

Catching Fire. Only because Finnick and Prim die in Mockingjay, and Rue and Clove die in The Hunger Games.

2. Who do you like better? Peeta or Gale?

Peeta. Yes, Gale is unbelievably hot, but Peeta seems a lot more laid back and a bit nicer.

3. When Finnick died what did you do?

I snapped the book shut, threw it across the room and then started crying.

4. If you met Katniss and Peeta at Wal-Mart with their kids, what would you do?

Scream. And then freak out because the Hunger Games would be real, and I can marry Gale, have Johanna at my wedding, and be best friends with Finnick. Then ask what the children's names are, and start playing with them.

5. What District would you live in if you lived in Panem?

Probably 2 (I'm a bit brutal, according to my sister and friends), 4 (because I can swim really well), or 7 (I, actually, really like the woods)

6. If someone came over to you and told you that Peeta sucks and that Gale should be with Katniss what would you do?

Probably say that's fine, but unintentionally roll my sleeves up and crack my neck.

Awesome Copy and Pastes

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and yell at some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of authors confuse "you're" and "your". If you're one of the 2 percent who knows how to tell them apart, copy and paste this into your profile.

98% of Girls would cry if Justin Bieber disappeared off the face of the Earth. Post this on your page if you are one of the 2% that would run around the house screaming: "Yay! I'll never have to hear his irritating voice ever again!"

Less than 1 percent of teenagers don't use make-up. Are you one of those who don't? BE PROUD AND GLUE THIS THING IN YOUR PROFILE!

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

Quiz!

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more? 9

. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

If so, scroll down (don't cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If your initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose...

California: You like adventure.

Florida: You are a laid back person.

9. If you choose...

Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you REPOST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday