Daughter 0f Poseidon
Gender: Female Religion: Catholic My Motto: PJO TODAY...PJO TOMORROW...PJO FOREVER!! Copy and Pastes!! If you are random and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever pushed on a door when it said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile! If you have to run up and down the escalator copy this into your profile! If you are obsessed with over 30 characters from books, copy this into your profile! If people question your sanity daily, copy this into your profile! If you have a mad crush on a fictional book character, copy this into your proflie! Do it! If you have ever laughed for 10 minutes straight, copy this into your profile. If you sing loudly in public copy this into your profile. If you talk to random people on the street, copy this into your profile. If you love ice cream copy and paste this into your profile! If you have a copy and paste on your profile, copy and paste this into your profile! If you have too much junk on your profile and proud of it. copy and paste this into your profile! If you think that some day you are going to be claimed by a greek god or GODDESS copy and paste this into your profile! If you argue with yourself in the shower/mirror copy and paste this into your profile. If you talk back to the TV, copy this into your profile! Go on do it already! If you constantly forget what your saying copy this into your profile! I do this all the time. If you disagree with people just because you want to annoy them even if you agree, copy this into your profile. If you spend to much time looking at peoples' profiles, copy this into your profile right NOW! If you think writers block sucks and should go die, copy this into your profile. DO IT! If you think the question mark key shouldnt be shared with the slash key, copy this into your profile. If you think ! rock, copy this into your profile!! 97 percent of girls age 11 and up would be crying and screaming if the Jonas Brothers were threatening to jump off of a building. If you are part of the 3 percent who would be yelling "Jump, Jump!!" copy this into your profile! If you talk to yourself, copy this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy this into your profile. If you own a journal but think they are stupid copy this into your profile. If you have ever lost some one you love copy this into your profile. Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile! (we are so beating Luke at ruling the world. Muhahaha!) If you have ever read past 2:00 am copy this into your profile. My best friends are insane!! Help ME! If you agree or have insane friends, or both, copy this into your profile. For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile. If you're the kind of person that will burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday copy this into your profile. If you hate girly girls and people who think they're all that ,copy this into your profile. If you get annoyed when people sit around and gossip for hours, copy this into your profile! If you are a feminist, copy this into your profile. If you like being utterly random copy and PASTE this into your profile. If you have ever loaded the dishwasher/dryer/washer and forgotten to turn it on, copy this into your profile. If you have way too many copy and pastes. copy this into your profile. If you think school systems are stupid,copy this into your profile. If you make up your own copy and paste thingies, copy and paste this into your profile already! If you think that being unique is kooler than being cool copy this into your profile. If you have ever been standing straight up and suddenly fell over for no apparent reason, copy this into your profile. If you will never ever read all your copy and pastes again , paste this into your profile. If you hear voices of the characters in your head copy this into your profile. If you have ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever fallen going up the stairs, copy this into your profile. If you dont know what Maximum Ride is copy this into your profile. If you have read peoples profiles to look for things to copy and paste, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freaking' Trix, copy this into your profile Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list:Icewolf13,Athena'sChild,My SeaGreen Eyes (Again! How small are these freakin lists?I guess everyone is concerned with being popular!) fill up space,fill up space, fill up space, fill up space, fill up space, fill up space, fill up space, fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space,fill up space. If your profile is long add this. (I just made my profile even lonnnnnnnnnnnnnger!) If you are in love with copying and pasting stuff into your profile, copy this message into your profile. If you think its really really odd that most actors/actresses are vegans/vegitarians copy this into your profile. It is good though,more people should be vegitarians. Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile, and add your name. KaidaThorn Gingerstar14 Spottednose, Pink Kitty Cat, Snowfeather, Spottedheart, Maplepelt, Athena'sChild,My SeaGreen Eyes, If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile. If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this onto your profile. If you just adore German Shepherds copy and paste this in your profile Boys say that in everything they do, they can kick a girl's butt so bad that they cry. If you're a girl who kicks the boys' butts so bad they cry like girls, copy this into your profile, and add your name KaidaThorn Gingerstar14 Spottednose, Pink Kitty Cat, Maplepelt,Athena'sChild!! (ROFL!),My SeaGreen Eyes If you've ever had a random laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this onto your profile If you like food, copy and then PASTE this into your profile!! You say Playboy Put this on your profile if you agree. If you think the Evil Bunny should rule the world, copy and paste this into your profile (\ _ /) (Isnt he cute!! He'll look great on a throne with a little carrot crown!! Okay you dont have to copy this little part.) Okay I got this off of another persons profile, but it was so sad I had to put it on mine : ( Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school, He told his friends that it was cool, And when he pulled the trigger back, It shot with a great, huge crack. Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told, I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold! When I went to school that day, I never said good-bye. I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry. When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another, And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother. Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much, And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush. And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class, And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this. But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss. And Mommy tell the doctors; I know that they really did try I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry. Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest, But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could please listen to me if you would, I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid, I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live. But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry to cancel the date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you" if that broke your heart and maybe even made you cry, copy it onto your profile so that they are not forgotten. Percy Jackson and the Olympians Survey: 1.Which book from the series was your favorite? Why? Titan's Curse cuz Thalia is 0n !t m0r3 2.Which Olympian god or goddess is your favorite? Least favorite? Poseidon / Hera 3. Which half blood/mortal in the series is your favorite? Least favorite? Thalia & Percy / Luke & Rachel 4. Percabeth or Lukabeth? m@n n0 Palia I Gu3 Percabeth cuz !f !t w@ Lukabeth I w0uld pr0bl3y k!ll R!ck (JK) 5. Annabeth or Rachel? Thalia!! Aww shes not a choice. Fine! Annabeth then. 6. Thalia or Luke? Yay Thalia is a choice!! Thalia 7. Riptide or Backbiter? Riptide cuz !tz Percy's 8. Wisdom or the Sea? Sea DUH !! TRUE OR FALSE (opinion based) 9.Percabeth? True 10. Perachel? False. 11. I have read a PJO book in less than four hours. True!! Sea of Monsters!! I r3@d !t uNd3r 2 HoUr 12. I wish that when Annabeth kissed Percy they wouldnt be about to die and he would kiss back. TRUE TRUE TRUENESS!! 1.Write the name of a person of the opposite gender. 2.Which is your favorite color out of black, red blue, green, and yellow? 3. First initial? 4.Your birth month? 5.Which color do you like more, Black or White? 6.Name of a person the same sex as you are. 7. Your favorite number? 8.Do you like California or Florida more? 9. Write down a wish (a realistic one). Are you done? If so, scroll down (Don’t cheat--) THE ANSWERS 1. You are completely in love with this person. 2. If you choose: Red: You are alert and your life is full of love. Black: You are conservative and aggressive. Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back. Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are 3. If you’re initial is: A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life. Ahhh i see so ive got love and friendship! L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good. 4. If you were born in: Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your 5. If you choose... Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do 6. This person is your best friend. 7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime. 8. If you choose... Florida: You are a laid back person. YuP! 9. If you choose... 10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday! YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!! Fun Things To Do In A Lift 1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, 2) STAND silent and motionless in the 3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt 4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake 5) MEOW occasionally. 6) STARE At another passenger for a 7) SAY -DING at each floor. 8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And 9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone 10) STARE, grinning at another passenger 11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look 12) TRY to make personal calls on the 13) DRAW a little square on the floor 14) WHEN there's only one other person 15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they 16) ASK if you can push the button for 17) HOLD the doors open and say you're 18) DROP a pen and wail until someone 19) BRING a camera and take pictures of 20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant 21) SWAT at flies that don't exist. 22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it. THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART 1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. 4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, 9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. 15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here! 16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!" Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things The Percy Jackson pleadge: I promise to remember Percy ████████████ 1000 Percy Jackson fan! P R You Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When… You go to the Empire State Building and you ask for the 600th Floor. There’s a thunderstorm going on and you scream, “CALM DOWN, ZEUS!” Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes. When you see Harry Potter, you think of Percy with glasses. You burn food to see if it smells good. You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!” You’re in a running/swimming race and you’re praying and sacrificing to Hermes/Poseidon. You think that your favorite singer is a child of Apollo. Someone close to you dies and you give them money (LOTS of it) just in case… Everyone else is creating a Twilight family and you create a PJO family. You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda… You’re on a boat and you pray that Poseidon is in a good mood. You’re in the air (hang-gliding, cliff-diving, bungee jumping, flying, in a plane, etc.) and you hope Zeus is in a good mood and won’t blast you out of the air. You go to Aunty Em’s and say you’re camera shy. You find your true love and thank Aphrodite for sending him/her to you. You think George Bush is a son of Ares (he’s dumb and violent you know!). You know Muse is the best singers. Get it, the Nine Muses?? Bring a blue plastic hairbrush with you everywhere. When it gets really cold randomly, blame Kronos. You get a Greek mythology calendar for Christmas You get really mad at Hades when a family member dies. You sometimes try to control water. You don't read anything but PJO for 3 months. You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address. Even though not diagnosed, you claim you have ADHD or dyslexia and blame it You yell "Annabeth!" everytime you see a NY Yankees hat. You make the PJO characters on Sims, as Miis on the Wii, and other video Anytime you see an orange shirt, you look at the front of it to see if it is You are a PJO character for Halloween. Recite lines randomly from the books. When you see/hear about anything myhtology-related, you talk about how it Buy anything New York or San Francisco-related. You are going to the Camp Half-Blood in Texas You are suddenly obsessed with Adidas shoes because they have the Hermes You claim that Percy IS real and lives in New York no matter how much your friends argue with you. You have dreams about PJO characters/events (It has happened). You carry a ballpoint pen in your pocket. That everytime you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword. Everytime you play dodgeball, you bring a suit of armor. You go to San Fransisco looking for the Old Sea Man. You find yourself praying to Poseidon for rain. Whenever your internet slows down, you yell at the sky and say "HERMES! WHY You stuff your (ahem) Harry Potter books in the back of your closet so you When someone gets married, you say: "I hope you shall not anger Hera" In the beginning of your first History class, you burst out "Will we be You pretend (or actually) faint when someone asks "Who's Percy?" When someone mentions the name Percy (like Percy Weasley) you scream When someone dies, you pray to Hades to allow them to go across Styx for You are known to scream names of the characters at random times. You've got any copy of any book in all your backpacks/binders incase of You pray to Athena when you don’t study for a math test. And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth. You make a list of characters never to anger, like this one and why: You have ADD, are diagnosed, and are convinced that you are a demigod because of this. When you steal your friend's pen you believe it's justified because your dad is the god of thieves, and you thought it was Riptide and had to check to make sure Percy was still alive. You write fanfiction constantly, even when you're not at your computer. When your mom grounds you from the computer, you blame it on a combination of Nemesis, Hera and Hermes' little joke. You want Hephaestus to fix your iPod when it breaks. You give all your siblings god parents You call the "Ares kids", or school bullies, Martians. You quiz fellow fans on the minor gods and win. You spend time doing pointless research at , just because Rick Riordan linked it on his site. You still think Thuke could happen. You plan several statements to avoid Apollo's lines and remember he's a player, should he ever hit on you, and several ways to get out of being cursed. You imagine the gods alone, and what they really do on the Superbowl. You think Percy's extended family needs extensive therapy. You have a countdown to the Demigod Files because of the mention of Percabeth. You want Kronos buried under Witchita, Kansas in a safe deposit toothpick box. No one will ever look there, and hopefully he'll be too tiny to bother the locals. Your mother thinks you need to get a boyfriend, as does your father to cure your obsession. You blame your little brother's desire to turn off your Internet in the middle of this review on Hermes' anger that you've joked about all of them. You imagine random unwritten PJO moments during class and laugh. When one brave soul unaware of your obsession broaches the question of why you were laughing, you try to explain. They think you are nuts because you are laughing at Hades' wild card of Nico. You think of creative names for Percy besides Seaweed Brain, such as kelphead16 because his head is full of kelp and there's an 85 chance he'll die at the age of sixteen. You wonder if you'll be able to drive a car come your 16, provided Percy saves the world, because of that. You know you're obsessed when you lose something, and say, "Come on Hermes! You think all the popular girls at your school are children of Aphrodite. And say to all the braniacs at your school if Athena is okay. (Don’t hurt me Athena). You go on YouTube and look at PJO themes for characters. You read page 287 of BotL over and over again or say the lines in your head (this is for Nico-obsessed people. I am not one of them!) Your internet homepage is Rick Riordan's blog. You and your other PJO obsessed friend cracks up if any one mentions the word You and your PJO obsessed friend start a fan club with only you two in it. You get other people obsessed. You have constant vivid dreams about the fifth book. You spend most of your time thinking what will happen in the fifth book. You jump up and down at the idea of LT becoming a movie. You know exactly what someone means when they say LT, SoM, TC, BotL, PJO and Your favorite quote of all time comes from PJO. You and your friend has "diss-wars" using PJO CHARACTERS When someone dies, you give them a sack of red rubber balls for Cerberus. o Every time you see a guy in a wheelchair you think "Chiron!!”iBookworm-chan You find yourself saying things like "Oh my gods!" and "What the Hades?" iBookworm-chan When your boyfriend dumps you, you take the oath of the hunters (not that I When you burn yourself, you curse Hephaestus/Hestia. olympianchef213 ~You put an offering to Demeter next to your garden. olympianchef213 ~You go up to a teacher in a wheelchair and say, "I know who you really are, Chiron…" olympianchef213 ~You say "Maia!" when you are wearing shoes. olympianchef213 You checked to make sure your principal doesn’t have a tail. You know which pages the good parts are on. You suddenly hate thunderstorms. You start hearing Percabeth in every song you hear. You started calling your dog Mrs. O’Leary. You start figuring out who your godly parent is. (Aphrodite) You never looked at a ballpoint pen the same way again. You ask the cashier at the store if they stock Mythomagic cards. You start doing pro/con lists in your head. During Math. When you’re supposed to be taking notes. Each day you check every fan site you know of for new information. You try to figure out how much food dye you need to turn chocolate chip cookies blue. You make references to it in school reports and/or to friends that haven’t read it. The first thing you ask someone when you meet them is, “Have you read PJO?” You yell “Mizzenmast!” whenever you enter a boat. You curse a god/goddess a lot. (I say, "Oh my Gods") You have one (Or more) pictures relating to PJO in your room You know PJO better then most sane people You have links to every great PJO site You add things to the list every day You know what you would do if you were Percy You argue with your friends about if Nico should turn evil or not (Absaloutly NOT!) At least half of your friends have read all the PJO, or are going to in the very near future You wish you could find a rainbow to see if Iris messages work (I just need to find a golden drachama) You give friends and youself a godly parent, You are trying to learn Greek (And succeding!!) You keep thinking about one of the PJO books when you go on a trip. You think of percy every time you see a dark haried green-eyed boy You have an instant crush on Nico! (Hades NO!) You just have to research more about greek mythology (Did that. Know almost everything now. :-P) You want to learn Latin You copy/paste this onto your profile Most of your fics are PJO related, even if it is a cross over You have taken every test you can find about what demigodly parent you would/do/should have, and your trying to get your friends to You make sure all of your friends (Or most of them), have an idea about what you say when talking about PJO Your friends (At least one), think you are obbsessed with PJO, and you agree You have one or more things related to PJO on your school stuff, and if someone asks you why, you tell them You have something on your school things (Or home things), that says 'Daughter (Or son if you're a guy) of God/goddess', and you don't even try to hide it, even if it says daughter of Name of unliked god.goddess You’re nodding and smiling when you read this You own every single book You are planning on adding a lot more things to this list You call yourself a demigod You wish with every fibre of your being that the first page of The Lightning Theif told the truth, and the PJO series is real You find yourself praying to a random god when you didn't study for a math test because you were too busy reading PJO Youv'e called someone you know a satyr And thats how you know your obsessed with PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS!. -0-50 OR SO AWESOME WAYS TO MAKE YOUR TEACHER WANNA BACKHAND YOU!!-0- 2. After everything your teacher says, ask why continuously. 3. If your teacher is yelling at a classmate, wait for them to finish their tantrum then ask” DOES SOMEBODY NEED A HUG??” very loudly. 4. If your teacher starts blowing up at you for saying that, simply reply, “wow I can tell you’re a blast at parties” 5. Sit in a corner and wait for everyone to stare at you. When they do, grab your head and scream “ THE LIGHT! MAKE IT STOP! ARGH IT BURNS!!” 6. Flick pieces of paper around the class. 7. When your teacher tells you to stop, cross your arms and say, “Your racist against paper aren’t you.” 8. Don’t do your Homework. 9. When your teacher asks you why you didn’t do your homework say “I dropped it while beating up this guy for saying you’re the worst teacher ever.” then sit there and smile sweetly. 10. When you have a supply teacher, wait for them to write their name on the board. Then when they say hello my name is Mr./Mrs (insert name here), you stand up and say “PROVE IT!” 11. When your teacher asks why you were late say, “My goldfish died.” Then burst into tears. 12. When handing in your homework, write "This paper will self-destruct in 5 seconds." at the bottom. 13. When you leave the class bow and say, “May the force be with you, young one.” 14. When the teacher turns the light off, start singing opera as loud as you can. When they turn the light back on, look around pretending to be confused. 15. Whisper to the person next to you. When the teacher comes up behind you, scream “OMG GET AWAY! RAPE! RAPE! RAPE!!” 16. Walk into class dancing the Macarena 17. Tell your teacher you heard the other teachers talking about him/her in the staff room 18. Raise your hand and say "I totally agree!" after everything your teacher says 19. Spend the whole lesson trying to lick your elbow 20. Speak in French. 21. Come late to class in a Spider-Man costume; say there was "a disturbance” 22. When they tell someone to turn around have everyone in class do it as well 23. "The homework’s due now? Oh, give me a minute then." 24. Hand in an essay where every word is misspelt. 25. Run in the room screaming, “THE WORLD IS GOING TO END!” 26. When the teacher asks you why you are late, say, “The queen is never late, everyone else is simply early." 27. When a teacher asks you a question, say, “I’m sorry, the brain you tried to reach has been disconnected, please leave me alone or try again later, thank you.” 28. When the teacher turns on the overhead projector, scream “AAH MY EYES!!” 29. Tell yourself knock-knock jokes, then laugh loads. 30. Hide under your desk and yell “THE SKY IS FALLING!” 31. When someone knocks on the door, shout “OH NO, THEY’RE COMING FOR ME!” 32. Bring in a 7th Grader and says he’s your new pet. 33. In your technology lesson, when the teacher asks you what you are making, say a nuclear bomb. 34. When your teacher asks you a question, just stare at them. 35. Constantly talk to yourself in a low voice. 36. Purposely fall off your chair and make a big scene about it. 37. If you’re playing a really boring game, make a big deal if you win. 38. Glue all their scissors together. 39. Make paperclip jewellery. I.e. necklaces, earrings, etc… 40. Pull out one strand of someone’s hair and yell “DNA!” 41. Wear a sticker or a badge that says ‘I am retarded’ 42. Talk to a pen. 43. Put your hand up in a test and wait for your teacher to come over. When they whisper what’s wrong, yell “NO I WON’T MAKE OUT WITH YOU AFTER CLASS!” 44. Yell “LIAR!” to everything they say. 45. Smile. All the time. 46. Draw a tiny black spot on your arm. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, “It’s spreading, IT’S SPREADING!” 47. When a supply teacher is taking the register, say everyone is missing. Then, if they ask who you are, say ‘Your worst Nightmare’ 48. When you know the answer, bounce up and down and go "OOOHH I KNOW THIS!!" 49. When a teacher calls on you say, "I forgot." To every question she asks. 50. If you have to blow your nose in class, blow your nose to the tune of your favourite song. ADDITIONALS 51. When the teacher is not facing you, get the whole class to move their desks forward towards the him/her! 52. Hum throughout the lesson, but make sure you do not get caught! 53. When a teacher asks you a question... Reply "ERM, COMPUTER SAYS NOOO!!" 54. When the teacher makes a statement, stand boldly and shout "I OBJECT!!" 55. REPEAT the last word the teacher says but say it much louder! 56. While the teachers back is turned, everyone swaps seats! 57. If you are sure you haven't passed the test, write your phone number at the end with a heart! 58. When you hear a Police car siren from outside, run around screaming in the classroom shouting "Oh no, they're here. Oh my god. Shit. Shit. Shit. What do I do? Miss/Sir you have to help me! Oh god. They must have found the body! HELP!" 59. When it's your turn to answer a question... Shout "NEXT!" A girl named Diane went to a party and stayed longer than she planned, and had to walk home. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked under the tall elm tree, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a shortcut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing as though he was waiting for her. Diane became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped around her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been killed and raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she'd been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, Diane began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she'd seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told that he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why the man hadn't attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered: Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her. Amazingly, whether you believe it or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 97 of teenagers won't stand up for God? Repost if you truly believe in God. PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what. "If you deny me in front of your friends, I shall deny you in front of my Father." STAND UP FOR HIM! 51 of people won't repost this! :( Be one of the 49 who will If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven. Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile. 96 percent of teens won't stand up for Christ. If you are one of the 4 percent that will, copy and paste this in your profile. Copy & Paste This If you love God and you're not ashamed of Him repost this, and see what he does for you tonight This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't. A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t re-post it? Favourite Quotes/lines/paragraphs from my favourite book series...you guess it! Percy Jackson and the Olympians Before you read on, it contains MAJOR SPOILERS from the whole book series so if you haven't read them go read them NOW! The Lightning Thief You shall go west, and face the god who has turned, You shall find what was stolen, and see it safely returned, You shall be betrayed by one who calls you a friend, And you shall fail to save what matters most, in the end. If you’re a normal kid, reading this because you think it’s fiction, great. Read on. I envy you for being able to believe that none of this ever happened. Like at my fifth-grade school, when we went to the Saratoga battlefield, I had this accident with a Revolutionary War cannon. I wasn’t aiming for the school bus, but of course I got expelled anyway. You should’ve seen him run when it was enchilada day in the cafeteria. Behind me, Nancy Bobofit mumbled to a friend, “Like we’re going to use this in real life. Like it’s going to say on our applications, ‘Please explain why Kronos ate his kids.’” Then, when I thought he was going to give me some deep philosophical comment to make me feel better, he said, “Can I have your apple?” I gave her my deluxe I’ll-kill-you-later stare. I have moments like that a lot, when my brain falls asleep or something, and the next thing I know I’ve missed something, as if a puzzle piece fell out of the universe and left me staring at the black place behind it. The school counselor told me this was part if the ADHD, my brain misinterpreting things. All I could think of was that the teachers must’ve found the illegal stash of candy I’d been selling out of the my dorm room. Or maybe they’d realized I got my essay on Tom Sawyer from the Internet without ever reading the book and now they were going to take away my grade. Or worse, they were going to make me read the book. I called him an old sot. I wasn’t even sure what it meant, but it sound good. Words had started swimming off the page, circling my head, the letters doing one-eighties as if they were riding skateboards. I mean these socks were the size of sweaters, but they were clearly socks. “Yeah. Weird, huh? You think those socks would fit me?” Her two friends balled up the electric-blue socks, leaving me wondering who they could possible be for – Sasquatch or Godzilla. He looked at me mournfully, like he was already picking the kind of flower I’d like best on my coffin. Confession time: I ditched Grover as soon as we got to the bus terminal. The guy reeked like moldy garlic pizza wrapped in gym shorts. Maybe if I kick you in your soft spot, I thought. And make you sing soprano for a week. “It doesn’t matter? From the waist down, my best friend is a donkey—” Grover let out a sharp, throaty “Blaa-ha-ha!” I’d heard him make that sound before, but I’d always assumed it was a nervous laugh. Now I realized it was more of an irritated bleat. “Goat!” he cried. “What?” “I’m a goat from the waist down.” “You just said it doesn’t matter.” “Blaa-ha-ha! There are satyrs who would trample you underhoof for such insult!” “Oh, nobody much,” Grover said, obviously still miffed about the donkey comment. “Just the Lord of the Dead and a few of his blood-thirstiest minions.” “Those were the Fates. Do you know what it means—the fact they appeared in front of you? They only do what when you’re about to…when someone’s about to die.” “Whoa. You said ‘you’.” “No I didn’t. I said ‘someone’.” ‘You meant ‘you’. As in me.” “I meant you, like ‘someone’. Not you, you.” “He’s the one. He must be.” She was probably my age, maybe a couple of inches taller, and a whole lot more athletic looking. With her deep tan and her curl blond hair, she was almost exactly what I thought a stereotypical California girl would look like, except her eyes ruined the image. They were startling gray, like storm clouds; pretty, but intimidating, too, as if she were analyzing the best way to take me down in a fight. She glanced at the Minotaur horn in my hands, then back at me. I imagined she was going to say, You killed a minotaur! or Wow, you're so awesome! or something like that. "You're Dionysus," I said. "The god of wine." I thought about being a teacher for three thousand years. It wouldn’t have made my Top Ten Things to Wish For list. When we reached her, she looked at me over critically, like she was still thinking how much I drooled. “What’s your problem?” I was getting angry now. “All I know is, I kill some bull guy –” “Don’t talk like that!” Annabeth told me. “You know how many kids at this camp wish they’d had you chance?” “To get killed?” “To fight the Minotaur! What do you think we trained for?” "You assume that it has to be a male god who finds a human female attractive? How sexist is that?" "Annabeth, I'm sorry about the toilets." The wood nymph instructors left me in the dust. They told me not to worry about it. They'd had centuries of practice running away from lovesick gods. But still, it was a little humiliating to be slower than a tree. I mean, Olympus had to have liability issues, right? I was about to join the celebration when Annabeth’s voice, right next to me in the creek, said, “Not bad, hero.” I looked, but she wasn’t there. Annabeth shrugged. “I told you. Athena always, always has a plan.” “A plan to get me pulverized.” “Earthshaker, Stormbringer, Father of Horses. Hail, Perseus Jackson, Son of the Sea God.” "If I had my way," Dionysus said, "I would cause your molecules to erupt in flames. We'd sweep up the ashes and be done with a lot of trouble. But Chiron seems to feel this would be against my mission at this cursed camp: to keep you little brats safe from harm." "I've been waiting a long time for a quest, seaweed brain," she said. "Athena is no fan of Poseidon, but if you're going to save the world, I'm the best person to keep you from messing up.” "If you do say so yourself," I said. "I suppose you have a plan, wise girl?" Her cheeks colored. "Do you want your help or not?" The truth was, I did. "Remind me again-why do you hate me so much?" What I did next was so impulsive and dangerous I should've been named ADHD poster child of the year. "Braccas meas vescimini!" I yelled. She loved reading so much, I’d forgotten she was dyslexic, too. Annabeth muttered to me, “Circus caravan?” “Always have a strategy, right?” “Your head is full of kelp.” She studied the sphere critically, “The convexity will cause some distortion. The reflection’s size should be off by a factor of—” “Would you speak English?” “I am!” Annabeth straightened. In a bad imitation of my voice, she said: “It’s just a photo, Annabeth. What’s the harm?” “Forget it,” I said. “You’re impossible.” “You’re insufferable.” “You’re—” “Hey!” Grover interrupted. “You two are giving me a migraine, and satyrs don't even get migraines.” “No. This makes me sad.” He pointed at all the garbage on the ground. “And the sky. You can’t even see the stars. They’ve polluted the sky. This is a terrible time to be s satyr.” "Percy, meet Gladiola. Gladiola, Percy." “How does Gladiola know about the reward?” I asked. “He read the signs,” Grover said. “Duh.” “Of course,” I said “Silly me.” I tried not to drool in my sleep, since Annabeth was sitting right next to me. "Can't we work together a little?" I pleaded. "I mean, didn't Athena and Poseidon ever cooperate?" Annabeth had to think about it. "I guess...the chariot," she said tentatively. "My mom invented it, but Poseidon created horses out of the crests of waves. So they had to work together to make it complete." "Then we can cooperate, too. Right?" We rode into the city, Annabeth watching as the Arch disappeared behind a hotel. "I suppose," she said at last. It wasn’t all that thrilling, but Annabeth kept telling us interesting facts about how the Arch was built, and Grover kept passing me jelly beans, so I was okay. “Be honored, Percy Jackson. Lord Zeus rarely allows me to test a hero with one of my brood. For I am the Mother of Monster, the terrible Echidna!” I stared at her. All I could think to say was: “Isn’t that a kind of anteater?” Great, I thought. We just blowtorched a national monument. I'd love to tell you I had some deep revelation on my way down, that I came to terms with my own mortality, laughed in the face of death, et cetera. She’d also called me brave…unless she was talking to the catfish. Annabeth stood behind him, trying to look angry, but even she seemed relieved to see me. "We can't leave you alone for five minutes! What happened?" “I sort of fell.” “Percy! Six hundred and thirty feet?” Grover muttered something about girls bring harder to understand than the Oracle of Delphi, “Maybe it’s a problem that requires brains,” Annabeth said. “Ares has strength. That’s all he has. Even strength has to bow to wisdom sometimes.” "Are you kidding?" she looked at me as if I'd just dropped from the moon. Her cheeks were bright red. I smiled, a little dreamy, and was about to rub the scarf against my cheek when Annabeth ripped it out of my hand and stuffed it in her pocket. “Oh, no you don’t. Stay away from the love magic.” “On my mark,” I said. “No! On my mark!” “What?” “Simple physics!” she yelled. “Force times the trajectory angle –” “Fine!” I shouted. “On your mark!” "You're pretty smug, Lord Ares, for a guy who runs from Cupid statues." "So if the gods fight," I said, "will things line up the way they did with the Trojan War? Will it be Athena versus Poseidon?" "Why can't you place a blessing like that on us?" I asked. Annabeth cracked up the National Geographic Channel. “All those stations,” I told her, “and you turn on National Geographic. Are you insane?” “It’s interesting.” He said, “Die, human! Die, silly polluting nasty person!” “That,” she said, “depends on the need. But remember: what belongs to the sea will always return to the sea.” “How did you die, then?” I nudged Grover. “Oh,” he said. ‘Um…drowned…in the bathtub.” “All three of you?” Charon asked. We nodded. “Big bathtub.” Annabeth grabbed hold of my hand. Under normal circumstances, this would've embarrassed me, but I understood how she felt. She wanted reassurance that somebody else was alive on this boat. So few people did good in their lives. It was depressing. When he sat forward in his throne, shadowy faces appeared in the folds of his black robes, faces of torment, as if the garment were stitched of trapped souls from the Fields of Punishment, trying to get out. The ADHD part of me wondered, off-task, whether the rest of his clothes were made the same way. What horrible things would you have to do in your life to get woven into Hades's underwear? “I’m a satyr,” Grover said. “We don’t have souls like humans do. He can torture me until I die, but he won’t get me forever. I’ll just be reincarnated as a flower or something. It’s the best way.” She swallowed, “Wear this, at least. For luck.” She took off her necklace, with five years’ worth of camp beads and the ring from the father, and tried it around my neck. “Reconciliation,” she said. “Athena and Poseidon together.” My face felt a little warm, but I managed a smile. “Thanks.” She stared at me. “Fly, like, in an airplane, which were warned never to do lest Zeus strike you out of the sky, and carrying a weapon that has more destructive power than a nuclear bomb?” “Yeah,” I said “Pretty much exactly like that. Come on.” He was reading a huge book with a picture of a wizard on the front. I wasn’t much into fantasy, but the book must’ve been good, because the guard took a while to look up. The sea does not like to be restrained. Annabeth’s shroud was so beautiful—gray silk with embroidered owls—I told her it seemed a shame not to bury her in it. She punched me and told me to shut up. Being the son of Poseidon, I didn’t have any cabin mates, so the Ares cabin had volunteered to make my shroud. They’d taken old bedsheet and painted smiley faces with X’ed-out eyes around the border, and the word LOSER painted really big in the middle. It was fun to burn. The decision should have been easy. I mean, nine months of hero training or nine months of sitting in a classroom—duh. Deadlines just aren't real to me until I'm staring one in the face. Sugar and caffeine. My willpower crumbled. Annabeth sat next to me, holding my nectar glass and dabbing a washcloth on my forehead. “How are you feeling?” he asked. “Like my insides have been frozen, then microwaved.” She pursed her lips. "You won't try anything stupid during the school year, will you? At least...not without sending me an Iris-message?" I managed a smile. "I won't go looking for trouble. I usually don't have to." "When I get back next summer," she said, "we'll hunt down Luke. We'll ask for a quest, but if we don't get approval, we'll sneak off and do it anyway. Agreed?" "Sounds like a plan worthy of Athena." She held out her hand. I shook it. "Take care, Seaweed Brain," Annabeth told me. Keep your eyes open." The Sea of Monsters You shall sail the iron ship with warriors of bones, You shall find what you seek and make it your own, But despair for your life entombed within stone, And fail without friends, to fly home alone. He walks with a strange limp, but unless you happen to catch him without his pants on (which I don't recommend), you'd never know there was anything un-human about him. She's funny that way, celebrating special occasions with blue food. I think it's her way of saying anything is possible. Percy can pass seventh grade. Waffles can be blue. Little miracles like that. As I stepped outside, I glanced at the brownstone building across the street. Just for a second I saw a dark shape in the morning sunlight—a human silhouette against the brick wall, a shadow that belonged to no one. Then it rippled and vanished. In social studies, while we were drawing latitude/longitude maps, I opened my notebook and stared at the photo inside-my friend Annabeth on vacation in Washington D.C. She was wearing jeans and a denim jacket over her orange Camp Half-Blood T-shirt. Her blond hair was pulled back in a bandanna. She was standing in front of the Lincoln Memorial with her arms crossed, looking extremely pleased with herself, like she'd personally designed the place. See, Annabeth wants to be an architect when she grows up, so she's always visiting famous monuments and stuff. She's weird that way. She'd emailed me the picture after spring break, and every once in a while I'd look at it just to remind myself she was real and Camp Half-Blood hadn't just been my imagination. I wished Annabeth were here. She'd know what to make of my dream. I'd never admit it to her, but she was smarter than me, even if she was annoying sometimes. They were new kids who must've been visiting, because they were all wearing those stupid HI! MY NAME IS: tags from the admissions office. They must've had a weird sense of humor, too, because they'd all filled in strange names like: MARROW SUCKER, SKULL EATER, and JOE BOB. No human beings had names like that. I wanted to tell him he was taking the dodgeball game way too seriously, but before I could, he hefted another ball. Matt Sloan, who'd been standing there dumbfounded the whole time, finally came to his senses. He blinked at Annabeth, as ifhe dimly recognized her from my notebook picture. "That's the girl...That's the girl—" Annabeth punched him in the nose and knocked him flat. "And you," she told him, "lay off my friend." "Annabeth," I said, "what are you talking about? Laistry-what?" "Laistrygonians. The monsters in the gym. They're a race of giant cannibals who live in the far north. Odysseus ran into them once, but I've never seen them as far south as New York before." "Laistry—I can't even say that. What would you call them in English?" She thought about it for a moment. "Canadians," she decided. "Now come on, we have to get out of here." What was it? Pick-on-Big-and-Ugly-Kids Day? Ever come home and found your room messed up? Like some helpful person (hi, Mom) has tried to "clean" it, and suddenly you can't find anything? And even if nothing is missing, you get that creepy feeling like somebody's been looking through your private stuff and dusting everything with lemon furniture polish? That's kind of the way I felt seeing Camp Half-Blood again. "Um ..." I said. "Would this be the super-dangerous prophecy that has me in it, but the gods have forbidden you to tell me about?" Nobody answered. "Right," I muttered. "Just checking." Someone had taped a piece of paper to her back that said, YOU MOO, GIRL! First there was Tyson moving into the Poseidon cabin, giggling to himself every fifteen seconds and saying, "Percy is my brother?" like he'd just won the lottery. Suddenly, I wasn't Percy Jackson, the cool guy who'd retrieved Zeus's lightning bolt last summer. Now I was Percy Jackson, the poor schmuck with the ugly monster for a brother. I told Tantalus to go chase a doughnut "I'll give you a hint. What do you get when you skin a ram?" "Messy?" She sighed. A fleece. The coat of a ram is called a fleece. And if that ram happens to have golden wool—" "The Golden Fleece. Are you serious?" “You do know the story of Jason and the Argonauts? "Yeah," I said. "That old movie with the clay skeletons." Annabeth rolled her eyes. "Oh my gods, Percy! You are so hopeless.” "What?" I demanded. "Just listen. The real story of the Fleece: there were these two children of Zeus, Cadmus and Europa, okay? They were about to get offered up as human sacrifices, when they prayed to Zeus to save them. So Zeus sent this magical flying ram with golden wool, which picked them up in Greece and carried them all the way to Colchis in Asia Minor. Well, actually it carried Cadmus. Europa fell off and died along the way, but that's not important." "It was probably important to her." "Where's that?” She stared at me like she thought I was playing dumb. "The Sea of Monsters. The same sea Odysseus sailed through, and Jason, and Aeneas, and all the others." "You mean the Mediterranean?" "No. Well, yes ... but no." "Another straight answer. Thanks." Could Clarisse save Half-Blood Hill? I thought the odds were better of me getting a "Best Camper" award from Tantalus. "So what's the moral?" "The moral?" Hermes asked. "Goodness, you act like it's a fable. It's a true story. Does truth have a moral?" "Um ..." "How about this: stealing is not always bad?" "I don't think my mom would like that moral." Rats are delicious, suggested George. What does that have to do with the story? Martha demanded. Nothing, George said. But I'm hungry. She's touching me, George complained as he and Martha slithered around the pole. "She's always touching you," Hermes said. "You're intertwined. And if you don't stop that, you'll get knotted again! The snakes stopped wrestling. George unhinged his jaw and coughed up a little plastic bottle filled with chewable vitamins. "You're kidding," I said. "Are those Minotaur-shaped?" Hermes picked up the bottle and rattled it. "The lemon ones, yes. The grape ones are Furies, I think. Or are they hydras? At any rate, these are potent. Don't take one unless you really, really need it." Hermes gazed up at the stars. "My dear young cousin, if there's one thing I've learned over the eons, it's that you can't give up on your family, no matter how tempting they make it. It doesn't matter if they hate you, or embarrass you, or simply don't appreciate your genius for inventing the Internet—" "You invented the Internet?" It was my idea, Martha said. Rats are delicious, George said. "It was my idea!" Hermes said. "I mean the Internet, not the rats. But that's not the point. Percy, do you understand what I'm saying about family?" "Percy," Annabeth said, trying to keep her cool, "we're going to Polyphemus's island! Polyphemus is an S-i-k ... a C-y-k . .." She stamped her foot in frustration. As smart as she was, Annabeth was dyslexic, too. We could've been there all night while she tried to spell Cyclops. "You know what I mean!" My mom hoped I would inherit Perseus's luck. Judging by how my life was going so far, I wasn't real optimistic. Annabeth looked at me. "We have to get out of here." "You think I want to be in the girls' restroom?" "I mean the ship, Percy! We have to get off the ship." I grabbed the thermos and hoped I was doing the right thing. "Hang on!" "I am hanging on!" Annabeth yelled. "Tighter!" "A half-blood hideout." I looked at Annabeth in awe. 'You made this place?" "Thalia and I," she said quietly. "And Luke." "Percy!" Annabeth scolded. "You just opened another Monster Donut shop somewhere!" I dodged a spray of acid. "I'm about to die and you're worried about that?How do we kill it?" Grover looked about ready to cry—so close to freedom, but so hopelessly far. I tried to stay mad at her, but itwasn't easy. We'd been through a lot together. She'd saved my life plenty of times. It was stupid of me to resent her. "Then why do the gods even let me live? It would be safer to kill me." "You're right." "Thanks a lot." I tried to scream for help, but all that came out of my mouth was, "Reeet, reeet, reeet!" I almost didn't recognize her. She was wearing a sleeveless silk dress like C.C.'s, only white. Her blond hair was newly washed and combed and braided with gold. Worst of all, she was wearing makeup, which I never thought Annabeth would be caught dead in. I mean, she looked good. Really good. I probably would've been tongue-tied if I could've said anything except reet, reet, reet. But there was also something totally wrong about it. It just wasn't Annabeth. I watched, horror-struck, but nothing happened. Annabeth was still Annabeth, only angrier. She leaped forward and stuck the point of her knife against Circe's neck. "How about turning me into a panther instead? One that has her claws at your throat!" "Thanks ..." I faltered. "I'm really sorry—" Before I could figure out how to apologize for being such an idiot, she tackled me with a hug, then pulled away just as quickly. "I'm glad you're not a guinea pig." "Me, too." I hoped my face wasn't as red as it felt. "They say the Sirens sing the truth about what you desire. They tell you things about yourself you didn't even realize. That's what's so enchanting. If you survive ... you become wiser. I want to hear them. How often will I get that chance?" Coming from most people, this would've made no sense. But Annabeth being who she was—well, if she could struggle through Ancient Greek architecture books and enjoy documentaries on the History Channel, I guessed the Sirens would appeal to her, too. "Don't untie me," she said, "no matter what happens or how much I plead. I'll want to go straight over the edge and drown myself." "Are you trying to tempt me?" "Ha-ha." She started to sob-I mean horrible, heartbroken sobbing. She put her head on my shoulder and I held her. She pulled her blanket around her. "My fatal flaw. That's what the Sirens showed me. My fatal flaw is hubris." I blinked. "That brown stuff they spread on veggie sandwiches?" She rolled her eyes. "No, Seaweed Brain. That's hummus. Hubris is worse." "What could be worse than hummus?" "Hubris means deadly pride, Percy. Thinking you can do things better than anyone else ... even the gods." You might as well put up a billboard that said, SOMETHING EVIL LIVES HERE. A minute later Annabeth hit a slippery patch of moss and her foot slipped. Fortunately, she found something else to put it against. Unfortunately, that something was my face. "Sorry," she murmured. "S'okay," I grunted, though I'd never really wanted to know what Annabeth's sneaker tasted like. "Trickery," Annabeth decided. "We can't beat him by force, so we'll have to use trickery." "Okay," I said. "What trick?' "I haven't figured that part out yet." "Great." "Polyphemus will have to move the rock to let the sheep inside." "At sunset," I said. "Which is when he'll marry Clarisse and have Grover for dinner. I'm not sure which is grosser." "I could get inside," she said, "invisibly." "What about me?" "The sheep," Annabeth mused. She gave me one of those sly looks that always made me wary. "How much do you like sheep?" "Just don't let go!" Annabeth said, standing invisibly somewhere off to my right. That was easy for her to say. She wasn't hanging upside down from the belly of a sheep. I made a silent promise to the gods that if we survived this, I'd tell Annabeth she was a genius. The frightening thing was, I knew the gods would hold me to it. "That's right, you smelly bucket of nose drool!" It didn't sound quite as good as Annabeth's insults, but it was all I could think of. "I'm Nobody and I'm proud of it! Now, put her down and get over here. I want to stab your eye out again." Which reminded me...I still owed the gods a debt. "You're a genius," I told Annabeth quietly. Then I put my head against the Fleece, and before I knew it, I was asleep, too. "Dude!" the centaur groaned, almost buckling under Tyson's weight. "Do the words 'low-carb diet' mean anything to you?" "Advanced planning, my dear. I figured you would wash up near Miami if you made it out of the Sea of Monsters alive. Almost everything strange washes up near Miami." We arrived in Long Island just after Clarisse, thanks to the centaurs' travel powers. I rode on Chiron's back, but we didn't talk much, especially not about Kronos. I knew it had been difficult for Chiron to tell me. I didn't want to push him with more questions. I mean, I've met plenty of embarrassing parents, but Kronos, the evil titan lord who wanted to destroy Western Civilization? Not the kind of dad you invited to school for career day. "You weren't able to talk sense into him?" "Families are messy. Immortal families are eternally messy. Sometimes the best we can do is to remind each other that we're related, for better or worse ... and try to keep the maiming and killing to a minimum." Tyson blushed. The crowd cheered. Annabeth planted a kiss on my cheek. The roaring got a lot louder after that. The worst part was the beginning—the "Percy-Jackson-what-were-you-thinking-do-you-have-any-idea-how-worried-I-was-sneaking-off-to-camp-without-permission-going-on-dangerous-quests-and-scaring-me-half-to-death" part. "The Fleece," he said. "The Fleece did its work too well." The Titan’s Curse Five shall go west to the goddess in chains, One shall be lost in the land without rain, The Bane of Olympus shows the trail, Campers and Hunters combined prevail, The Titan's curse must one withstand, And one shall perish by a parent's hand. Despite the danger we were in, I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing. A teacher named Got Chalk? He had to be kidding. Thalia nodded. She cocked her ear to the music and made a face. “Ugh. Who chose Jesse McCartney?” Grover looked hurt. “I did.” “Oh my gods, Grover. This is so lame. Can’t you play, like, Green Day or something?” “Green who?” “So…” I tried to think of something to say. Act natural, Thalia had told us. When you’re a half-blood on a dangerous mission, what the heck is natural? I looked nervously at Annabeth, then at the groups of girls who were roaming the gym. "Well?" Annabeth said. "Um, who should I ask?" She punched me in the gut. "Me, Seaweed Brain." "Oh. Oh, right." She said this the same way she might say Fields of Punishment or Hades’s gym shorts. Meanwhile, I projected my thoughts like crazy—anything to get Grover’s attention: Grover! Apples! Tin cans! Get your furry goat behind out here and bring some heavily armed friends! “We have to jump off the cliff,” I told her quietly. “Into the sea.” “Oh, super idea. You’re completely nuts, too.” But when this twelve-year-old girl told me she was the goddess Artemis, I said something real intelligent like, “Um…okay.” "Hey, can I see that sword you were using?" “Well, then Thorn was talking about the Great Stir Pot—” “Stirring” Bianca corrected. "Bianca, camp is cool! It's got a pegasus stable and a sword-fighting arena and… I mean, what do you get by joining the Hunters?" I couldn’t believe I’d come this way and suffered so much only to lose Bianca to some eternal girls’ club. "Eternity with Artemis?" He heaved a big sigh. "Wow," Thalia muttered. "Apollo is hot." "Little sister!" Apollo called. If his teeth were any whiter he could've blinded us without the sun car. "What's up? You never call. You never write. I was getting worried!" "I feel a haiku coming on." Zoe ordered the Hunters to start loading. She picked up her camping pack, and Apollo said, "Here, sweetheart. Let me get that." “Orientation film?” Nico asked. “Is it G or PG? ‘Cause Bianca is kinda strict –” “It’s PG-13,” Grover said. I took Annabeth's baseball cap out of my backpack and set it on my nightstand. I'd give it to her when I found her. And I would find her. Tyson thought Annabeth was just about the coolest thing since peanut butter (and he seriously loved peanut butter) Grover blushed. “I was sort of camped outside the Artemis cabin.” “What for?” “Just to be, you know, near them.” “You’re a stalker with hooves.” “I…well, finally Chiron came out in his pajamas and his horse tail in curlers and—” “He wears curlers in his tail?” He gave me the brochure. It was about the Hunters of Artemis. The front read, A WISE CHOICE FOR YOUR FUTURE! Inside were pictures of young maidens doing hunter stuff, chasing monsters, shooting bows. There were captions like: HEALTH BENEFITS: IMMORTALITY AND WHAT IT MEANS FOR YOU! and A BOY-FREE TOMORROW! “Hi,” I said. “Uh, what’s up?” I winced at how stupid that sounded. Not much could be “up” when you’re dead and stuck in the attic. Then I noticed a pink silk scarf with a label attached to it. I picked up the tag and tried to read it: SCARF OF THE GODDESS APHRODITE I stared at the scarf. I'd totally forgotten about it. Two years ago, Annabeth had ripped this scarf out of my hands and said something like, Oh, no. no love magic for you! I'd just assumed she'd thrown it away. And yet here it was. She'd kept it all this time? And why had she stashed it in the attic? "I'll show them 'love is worthless,'" Silena Beauregard grumbled as she strapped on her armor. "I'll pulverize them!" He stared at me, a little disappointed, and realized that I’d sounded like my mother. Whoa. Not a good sign. I had to run to catch up, and tripped over somebody’s shield, so I didn’t look much like a co-captain. More like an idiot. We set our flag at the top of Zeus’s Fist. It’s this cluster of boulders in the middle of the west woods that, if you look at it just the right way, looks like a huge fist sticking out of the ground. If you look at it from any other side, it looks like a pile of enormous deer droppings, but Chiron wouldn’t let us call the place the Poop Pile, especially after it had been named for Zeus, who doesn’t have much of a sense of humor. "Argh!" Thalia pushed me, and a shock went through my body that blew me backward ten feet into the water. Some of the campers gasped. A couple of the Hunters stifled laughs. The least the Oracle could’ve done was walk back to the attic by herself. Instead, Grover and I were elected to carry her. I didn’t figure that was because we were the most popular. Could an Olympian parent turn against his half-blood child? Would it sometimes be easier just to let them die? If there were ever any half-bloods who needed to worry about that, it was Thalia and me. I wondered if maybe I should've sent Poseidon that seashell pattern tie for Father's Day after all. “No!” Zoe said. “The Hunters do not need thy help.” “Your,” Thalia grumbled. “Nobody has said thy in, like, three hundred years, Zoe. Get with the times.” Zoe hesitated, like she was trying to form the word correctly. “Yerrr. We do not need yerrr help.” "I don't have much time," my mom said. "Percy, whatever you decide, I love you. And I know you'll do what's best for Annabeth." Whoa, boss! Its voice spoke in my mind as it clopped away from the sword blade. I don’t wanna be a horse-ke-bob! “It’s cool. No sword. See? No sword. Calm thoughts. Sea grass. Mama cows. Vegetarianism.” I couldn’t help thinking about my dream, with Annabeth crumpled and lifeless in Luke’s arms. Here I was rescuing baby monsters, but I couldn’t save my friend. God alert! Blackjack yelled. It's the wine dude! "We should go straight west. The prophecy said west." In each spot where a tooth had been planted, a creature was struggling out of the dirt. The first of them said: “Mew?” It was a kitten. A orange tabby with stripes like a tiger. Then another appeared, until there were a dozen rolling around and playing in the dirt. Everyone stared at them is disbelief. The General roared, “What is this? Cute cuddly kittens? Where did you find those teeth?” "If it weren't for dreams," he said, "I wouldn't know half the things I know about the future. They're better than Olympus tabloids." He cleared his throat, then held up his hands dramatically: I looked at Thalia. "You're afraid of heights." "That's us," he said. "Those five nuts right there." “Amazing,” Bianca said. “I’ve never actually seen the Milky Walk.” “This is nothing,” Zoe said. “In the old days, there were more. Whole constellations have disappeared because of human light pollution.” “You talk like you’re not human,” I said. Zoe raised an eyebrow. “I am a Hunter. I care what happens to the wild places of the world. Can the same be said for thee?” “For you,” Thalia corrected. “Not thee.” “But you use you for the beginning of a sentence.” “And for the end,” Thalia said. “No thou. No thee. Just you.” Zoe threw up her hands in exasperation. “I hate this language. It changes too often!” When she smiled at me, just for a moment she looked a little like Annabeth. Then like this television actress I used to have a crush on in fifth grade. Then...well, you get the idea. "Hoover Dam," Thalia said. "It's huge." The others nodded. Zoe was still looking at us strangely but I didn’t care. It seemed like cruel fate that we’d come to Hoover Dam, one of Annabeth’s personal favorites, and she wasn’t here to see it. "Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can." "There is always a way out for those clever enough to find it." “Oh my god!” she shouted. “Do you always kill people when they blow their nose?” “Well, it’s either a sword or the biggest toothpick in the world.” I concentrated hard and snapped my fingers. “You don’t see a sword,” I told the girl. “It’s just a ballpoint pen.” She blinked. “Um…no. It’s a sword, weirdo.” "But who are you?" Now, if you have never been hit by a flying burrito, count yourself lucky. In terms of deadly projectiles, it's right up there with grenades and cannonballs. I felt like I should take a picture or something. Greetings from Frisco. Haven’t Died Yet. Wish You Were Here. I grumbled how mice it was to have super-powerful friends. He was fat, with a white bread that had turned yellow, kind of like Santa Claus, if Santa had been rolled out of bed and dragged through a landfill. “That’s a crime!” one of the homeless guys yelled. “Kid rolling an old guy like that!” Nereus spun and expanded, turning into a killer whale, but I grabbed his dorsal fin as he burst out of the water. A voice inside me was screaming Ask about Annabeth! That’s what I cared about most “Bessie?” I looked down at the bull serpent. “But…he’s too cute. He couldn’t destroy the world.” And there, shimmering in the Mist right next to us, was the last person I wanted to see: Mr. D, wearing his leopard-skin jogging suit and rummaging through the refrigerator. He looked up lazily. "Do you mind?" “Mr. D,” I said. He raised his eyebrow. “You called me by my right name,” I said. “You called me Percy Jackson.” “I most certainly did not, Peter Johnson. Now off with you!” “If I’m going to survive,” I said, “it won’t be because I’ve got a lion-skin cloak. I’m not Hercules.” I half expected Mrs. Chase to turn into a raving lunatic at the mention of her stepdaughter, but she just pursed her lips and looked concerned. "All right. Do on up to the study and I’ll bring you some food." She smiled at me. "Nice meeting you, Percy. I've heard a lot about you." "Can't this thing go any faster?" Thalia demanded. The music didn’t sound beautiful to me now—more like the sound track for a funeral. "I don't know," she admitted. "But thank you for rescuing me." "Hey, no big deal. We're friends." "You didn't believe I was dead?" "I gotta say"—Apollo broke the silence—"these kids did okay." He cleared his throat and began to recite: "Heroes win laurels—" "Wait just a minute," Ares growled. He pointed at Thalia and me. "These two are dangerous. It'd be much safer, while we've got them here—" "I will not have them punished," Artemis said. "I will have them rewarded. If we destroy heroes who do us a great favor, then we are no better than the Titans. If this is Olympian justice, I will have none of it." "My faithful companion, Zoe Nightshade, has passed into the stars. I must have a new lieutenant. And I intend to choose one. But first, Father Zeus, I must speak to you privately." "The most dangerous flaws are those which are good in moderation," she said. "Evil is easy to fight. Lack of wisdom… that is very hard indeed." She studied me with concern. She touched the new streak of gray in my hair that matched hers exactly—our painful souvenir from holding Atlas's burden. There was a lot I'd wanted to say to Annabeth, but Athena had taken the confidence out of me. I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. "I'll fill you in later," Chiron said with forced cheerfulness. "The important thing is you have prevailed. And you save Annabeth!" Grover stared at me. “Just three words. He said, ‘I await you.’” The Battle of the Labyrinth You shall delve in the darkness of the endless maze, The dead, the traitor, and the lost one raise, You shall rise or fall by the ghost king's hand, The child of Athena's final stand, Destroy with a hero's final breath, And to lose a love worse than death. "Think positive. Tomorrow you're off to camp! After orientation, you've got your date-" “Welcome to Goode,” the blond girl said. “You are so going to love it.” But as she looked at me up and down, her expression said something more like, Eww, who is this loser? I burst out of the alley onto East 81st and ran straight into Annabeth. Annabeth stared at me for a second. Then she turned and took off. “I need to talk to Clarisse,” Annabeth said. I stared at her as if she’d just said I need to eat a large smelly boot. “Percy!” he bellowed. He dropped his broom and ran at me. If you’ve never been charged by an enthusiastic Cyclops wearing a flowered apron and rubber cleaning gloves, I’m telling you, it’ll wake you up quick. "'You are okay?' he asked 'Not eaten by monsters?' Someone else slid next to me on the bench: Annabeth. Annabeth nodded. Despite how serious she was acting, I was happy she wasn't mad at me anymore. and I kind of liked the fact that she'd broken the rules to come sit next to me. Over at the head table, Quintus cleared his throat. I got the feeling he didn't want to make a scene, but Annabeth was really pushing it, sitting at my table so long. Quintus kept rattling off names until he said, "Percy Jackson with Annabeth Chase." I started forward, but Annabeth stopped me. "Don't take another step," she warned. "We need to find the exit." "I've been studying architecture for years," she said. "I know Daedalus's Labyrinth better than anybody." Annabeth stood in the back of the room, rifling through old scrolls. I tried to fall asleep, but I couldn't. Something about getting chased by a large dragon lady with poison swords made it real hard to relax. I picked up my bedroll and dragged it over to where Annabeth was sitting, keeping watch. I lost hope when I saw the horses’ teeth. “Monkey bars,” Annabeth said. “I’m great at these.” "I'm a child of Athena," she insisted. And this is an insult to my intelligence. I won't answer these questions." Part of me was impressed with her for standing up like that. But part of me thought her pride was going to get us all killed. Hephaestus glowered up at us. “I didn’t make you, did I?” I slashed a wide arc with Riptide and vaporized the entire front row of monsters. "Put your cap back on," I said. "Get out!" “Getting something and having the wits to use it...those are two different things.” Annabeth turned to face the audience. She looked terrible. Her eyes were puffy from crying, but she managed to say, "He was probably the bravest friend I've ever had. He..." Then she saw me. Her face went blood red. "He's right there!" Annabeth glared at me. "You are the single most annoying person I have ever met!" And she stormed out of the room. "So, you wrecked Alcatraz Island, made Mount St. Helens explode, and displaced half a million people, but at least you're safe." “You're a half-blood, too?” “They asked me a lot of questions about you. I played dumb.” You deal with mythological stuff for a few years, you learn that paradises are usually places where you get killed. "Be careful of love. It’ll twist your brain around and leave you thinking up is down and right is wrong.” "Don’t judge someone until you’ve stood at his forge and worked with his hammer, eh?” People are more difficult to work with than machines. And when you break a person, he can't be fixed. Jumping out a window five hundred feet aboveground is not usually my idea of fun. Especially when I'm wearing bronze wings and flapping my arms like a duck. "We'll try, Ms. Jackson," Annabeth said. "Keeping your son safe is a big job, though." She folded her arms and glared out the kitchen window. I picked at my napkin and tried not to say anything. “You hit the Lord of the Titans in the eye with a blue plastic hairbrush.” "Remake the wild, a little at a time, each in your own corner of the world. You cannot wait for anyone else, even a god, to do that for you.” "Poison!" Grover yelped. "Don't let those things touch you or..." Annabeth stood. "The fire's getting low. I'll go look for some more scraps while you guys talk strategy." And she marched off into the shadows. Rachel drew another figure with her stick-an ashy Antaeus dangling from his chains. "Annabeth's not usually like this," I told her. "I don't know what her problem is." Rachel raised her eyebrows. "Are you sure you don't know?" "What do you mean?" "Boys," she muttered. "Totally blind." "Something was wrong with Luke," Annabeth muttered, poking at the fire with her knife. "Did you notice the way he was acting?" I found Annabeth at my side, keeping pace, her sword in her hand. The god of wine looked around at the assembled crowd. “Miss me?” I held out a lead figurine of Hades—the little Mythomagic statue Nico had abandoned when he fled camp last winter. I turned and found Dionysus standing there, still in his black suit. "But remember, boy, that a kind act can sometimes be as powerful as a sword. As a mortal, I was never a great fighter or athlete or poet. I only made wine. The people in my village laughed at me. They said I would never amount to anything. Look at me now. Sometimes small things can become very large indeed.” Annabeth and I pretty much skirted around each other. I was glad to be with her, but it also kind of hurt, and it hurt when I wasn't with her, too. I hoped Annabeth would be riding into Manhattan with me, but she only came to see me off. She said she'd arranged to stay at camp a little longer. She would tend to Chiron until his leg was fully recovered, and keep studying Daedalus's laptop, which had engrossed her for the past two months. Then she would head back to her father's place in San Francisco. "I'm sorry," Annabeth told me. "I-I should get back. I'll keep in touch." "You've had a rough summer," he said. "I'm guessing you lost someone important. And...girl trouble?" I stared at him. "How did you know that? Did my mom-" He held up his hands. 'Your mom hasn't said a thing. And I won't pry. I just know there's something unusual about you, Percy. You've got a lot going on that I can't figure. But I was also fifteen once, and I'm just guessing from your expression...Well, you've had a rough time." Poseidon raised his eyebrows as they shook hands. “Blowfish, did you say?” “I couldn’t miss Percy’s fifteenth birthday,” Poseidon said. “Why, if this were Sparta, Percy would be a man today!” Poseidon put his weathered hand on my shoulder. “Percy, lesser beings do many horrible things in the name of the gods. That does not mean we gods approve. The way our sons and daughters act in our names…well, it usually says more about them than it does about us. And you, Percy, are my favorite son.” "You'd better go," Poseidon said. "But, Percy, one last thing you should know. That incident at Mount St. Helens..." For a second I thought he was talking about Annabeth kissing me, and I blushed, but then I realized he was talking about something a lot bigger. The Last Olympian The Great Prophecy A half-blood of the eldest gods, Shall reach sixteen against all odds, And see the world in endless sleep, The hero's soul, cursed blade shall reap, A single choice shall end his days, Olympus to preserve or raze. The end of the world started when a Pegasus landed on the hood of my car. I felt like one of Apollo's sacred cows- slow, dumb, and bright red. I’m not talking “giant” like 7.99 all-you-can-eat Alaskan king crab. I’m talking giant like bigger than the fountain. Time slowed down. I mean literally slowed down, because Kronos had that power Demigod dreams suck. My brother broke into a toothy grin, “Yay! Your brain works!” Annabeth ran in right behind him, and I'll admit my heart did a little relay race in my chest when I saw her. It's not that she tried to look good. We'd been doing so many combat missions lately, she hardly brushed her curly blond hair anymore, and she didn't care what clothes she was wearing - usually the same old orange camp T-shirt and jeans, and once in a while her bronze armor. Her eyes were stormy gray. Most of the time we couldn't get through a conversation without trying to strangle each other. Still, just seeing her made me feel fuzzy in the head. Last summer, before Luke turned into Kronos and everything went sour, there had been a few times when I thought maybe...well, that we might get past the strangle-each-other phase. We locked eyes. I thought of a different time last summer, under Mount St. Helens, when Annabeth thought I was going to die, and she kissed me. She cleared her throat and looked away. "Prophecy." "Right." I put down the scimitar. "Prophecy." "A half-blood of the eldest dogs…” “Er, Percy?” Annabeth interrupted. “That’s gods. Not dogs.” "It's our loot!" he yelled, standing on his tiptoes so he could get in Clarisse's face. "If you don't like it, you can kiss my quiver!" "It's him," I said. "Typhon." Annabeth blushed. It dawned on me that she knew I'd been hanging out with Rachel, and I felt guilty. Then I felt angry that I felt guilty. I was allowed to have friends outside of camp, right? It wasn't like... I found myself staring at her, which was stupid since I'd seen her a billion times. She and I were about the same height this summer, which was a relief. Still, she seemed so much more mature. It was kind of intimidating. I mean, sure, she'd always been cute, but she was starting to be seriously beautiful. "You know..." She brushed her hair behind her ear, like she does when she's nervous. "This whole thing with Beckendorf and Silena. It kind of makes you think. About...what's important. About losing people who are important." I nodded. My brain started seizing on little random details, like the fact that she was still wearing thos silver owl earrings from her dad, who was this braniac military history professor in San Francisco. "Um, yeah," I stammered. "Like...is everything cool with your family?" Okay, really stupid question, but hey, I was nervous. Annabeth looked disappointed, but she nodded. "My dad wanted to take me to Greece this summer," she said wistfully. "I've always wanted to see-" "The Parthenon," I remembered. She managed a smile. "Yeah." "That's okay. There'll be other summers, right?" "Annabeth." I stopped her by the tetherball court. I knew I was asking for trouble, but I didn't know who else to trust. Plus, I'd always depended on Annabeth for advice. I don't recommend shadow travel if you're scared of: "Not all powers are spectacular." Hestia looked at me. "Sometimes the hardest power to master is the power of yielding." "We need music," Nico said. "How's your singing?" The older lady harrumphed. "I warned you, daughter. This scoundrel Hades is no good. You could've married the god of doctors or the god of lawyers, but noooo. You had to eat the pomegranate." "Husband, we talked about this," Persephone chided. "You can't go around incinerating every hero. Besides, he's brave. I like that." "With great power . . . comes great need to take a nap. Wake me up later." "It will make you powerful. But it will also make you weak. Your prowess in combat will be beyond any mortal's, but your weaknesses, your failings will increase as well." The cord, a familiar voice said. Remember your lifeline, dummy! I love New York. You can pop out of the Underworld in Central Park, hail a taxi, head down Fifth Avenue with a giant hellhound loping behind you, and nobody even looks at you funny. She frowned. "What is it? "What's what?" I asked. "You're looking at me funny." I realized I was thinking of my strange vision of Annabeth pulling me out of the Styx River. "It's, uh, nothing." Different elevator music was playing since my last visit-that old disco song "Stayin' Alive." A terrifying image flashed through my mind of Apollo in bell-bottom pants and a slinky silk shirt. "She said to tell Percy: 'Remember the rivers.' And, um, something about staying away from her daughter. I'm not sure whose face was redder: Annabeth's or mine. "Silena, take the Aphrodite crew to the Queens-Midtown Tunnel." Just for you non-sea-god types out there, don't go swimming in New York Harbor. It may not be as filthy as it was in my mom's day, but that water will still probably make you grow a third eye or have mutant children when you grow up. "Hey, why do pegasi gallop as they fly, anyway?" "Wait here," I told Annabeth. "Percy, you shouldn't go alone." "Well, unless you can breathe underwater..." She sighed. "You are so annoying sometimes." "Like when I'm right? Trust me, I'll be fine. I’ve got the curse of Achilles now. I'm all invincible and stuff." Annabeth didn't look convinced. "Just be careful. I don't want anything to happen to you. I mean, because we need you for the battle." I grinned. "Back in a flash." Before I could lose my courage, I said, "Don't I get a kiss for luck? It's kind of a tradition, right?" In a flash I understood what had happened. He'd been trying to stab me. Judging from the position of his blade, he would've taken me - maybe by sheer luck - in the small of my back, my only weak point. Annabeth had intercepted the knife with her own body. "You're cute when you're worried," she muttered. "Your eyebrows get all scrunched together." "This belonged to my sister-in-law," Prometheus explained. "Pandora." "You Titans are about as bright as my gym socks." "Stop running, you fools!" Kronos yelled. "Stand and ACKK!" "I will deny I ever said this, of course, but the gods need heroes. They always have. Otherwise we would not keep you annoying little brats around." I looked in the direction Annabeth had gone, but she'd disappeared into the crowd. I couldn't believe what she'd just done - saved Rachel's life, landed a helicopter, and walked away like it was no big deal. "You know what would help this boy?" Demeter mused. "Farming." "There's no point in defending camp if you guys die. All our friends are here." "Hope survives best at the hearth." "Percy," Grover said, "the gods really don't appreciate people sitting in their thrones. I mean like turn-you-into-a-pile-of-ashes don't appreciate it." WHO DARES- Nico strode forward. The enemy army fell back before him like he radiated death, which of course he did. Hades smiled coldly. "Hello, Father. You're looking . . . young." I pulled her up and we lay trembling on the pavement. I didn't realize we had our arms around each other until she suddenly tensed. "Um, thanks," She muttered. " I tried to say Don't mention it, but it came out as "Uh duh." "I survive all those battles," she growled, "and I get defeated by a stupid chunk of rock!" Luke hardly paid me any attention. He stepped toward Annabeth, but I put myself between him and her. "Don't touch her," I said. She looked at me, like she was drinking in the fact that I was still here. And I realized I was doing the same thing. The world was collapsing, and the only thing that really mattered to me was that she was alive. Next to me, Annabeth's knees buckled. I caught her, but she cried out in pain, and I realized I'd grabbed her broken arm. "Oh gods," I said. "Annabeth, I'm sorry." "It's all right," she said as she passed out in my arms. "As for my brothers," Zeus said, "we are thankful"-he cleared his throat like the words were hard to get out-"erm, thankful for the aid of Hades." Artemis smiled. "You have done well, my lieutenant. You have made me proud, and all those Hunters who perished in my service will never be forgotten. They will achieve Elysium, I am sure." "Tyson, for your bravery in the war, and for leading the Cyclopes, you are appointed a general in the armies of Olympus. You shall henceforth lead your brethren into war whenever required by the gods. And you shall have a new . . . um . . . what kind of weapon would you like? A sword? An axe?" "Grover Underwood of the satyrs!" Dionysus called. Athena called, "Annabeth Chase, my own daughter." "The Council agrees," Zeus said. "Percy Jackson, you will have one gift from the gods." I glanced back. Annabeth was trying not to meet my eyes. Her face was pale. I flashed back to two years ago, when I'd thought she was going to take the pledge to Artemis and become a Hunter. I'd been on the edge of a panic attack, thinking that I'd lose her. now, she looked pretty much the same way "Kronos couldn't have risen if it hadn't been for a lot of demigods who felt abandoned by their parents," I said. "They felt angry, resentful, and unloved, and they had a good reason." "And the minor gods," I said. "Nemesis, Hecate, Morpheus, Janus, Hebe--they all deserve a general amnesty and a place at Camp Half-Blood. Their children shouldn't be ignored. Calypso and the other peaceful Titan-kind should be pardoned too. And Hades-" Athena stood in the middle of the road with her arms crossed and a look on her face that made me think Uh-oh. She'd changed out of her armor, into jeans and a white blouse, but she didn't look any less warlike. Her gray eyes blazed. "Spare me." Athena stepped close to me, and I could feel her aura of power making my skin itch. "I once warned you, Percy Jackson, that to save a friend you would destroy the world. Perhaps I was mistaken. You seem to have saved both your friends and the world. But think very carefully about how you proceed from here. I have given you the benefit of the doubt. Don't mess up." "Percy," Apollo said, "I wouldn't worry too much. The last Great Prophecy about you took almost seventy years to complete. This one may not even happen in your lifetime." "Chiron, I don't think the attic is the proper place for our new Oracle, do you?" Rachel kissed me on the cheek. “Good-bye, Percy,” she whispered. “And I don’t have to see the future to tell you what to do now, do I?” Her eyes seemed more piecing than before. I blushed. “No.” Everybody was patting Nico on the back, complimenting him on his fighting. Even the Ares kids seemed to think he was pretty cool. Hey, show up with an army of undead warriors to save the day, and suddenly you’re everybody’s best friend. "Hey." Anabeth slid next to me on the bench. "Happy birthday." Camp went late that summer. It lasted two more weeks, right up to the start of a new school year, and I have to admit they were the best two weeks of my life. Of course, Annabeth would kill me if I said anything different, but there was a lot of other great stuff going on too. "You're still my best friend." He grinned. "Except for Annabeth." "That's different." "Yeah," he agreed. "It sure is." “You’ll do great.” Annabeth hugged her. Funny, she seemed to get along fine with Rachel these days. Rachel bit her lip. “I hope you’re right I’m a little worried. What if somebody asks what’s on the next math test and I start spouting a prophecy in the middle of geometry class? The Pythagorean theorem shall be problem two… Gods, that would be embarrassing.” Annabeth laughed, and to my relief, it made Rachel smile. “Well,” she said, “you two be good to each other.” Go figure, but she looked at me like I was some kind of troublemaker. Annabeth, thank goodness, would be staying in New York. She'd gotten permission from her parents to attend a boarding school in the city so she could be close to Olympus and oversee the rebuilding efforts. "And close to me?" I asked. "Well, someone's got a big sense of his own importance." But she laced her fingers through mine. I remembered what she'd told me in New York, about building something permanent, and I thought - just maybe - we were off to a good start. I didn’t blame her, but it was hard to feel too upset on a nice day, with her next to me, knowing that I wasn’t really saying good-bye. We had lots of time. “You are so going to lose.” She took off down Half-Blood Hill and I sprinted after her. For once, I didn’t look back. The Demigod Files Percy Jackson and the Stolen Chariot I was in fifth-period science class when I heard these noises outside. SCRAWK! OW! SCREECH! “HIYA” Like somebody was getting attacked by possessed poultry, and believe me, that’s a situation I’ve been in before. I did the only thing I could. “Mrs. White,” I said, “can I go to the restroom? I feel like I’m going to puke.” You know how teachers tell you the magic word is please? That’s not true. The magic word is puke. It will get you out of your class faster than anything else. “He modeled that after his mom,” I said, looking up at the statue. Clarisse frowned at me. “Who?” “Bartholdi,” I said. “The dude who made the statue the Statue of Liberty. He was a son of Athena, and he designed it to look like his mom. That’s what Annabeth told me, anyway.” Clarisse rolled her eyes. Annabeth was my best friend and a huge nut when it came to architecture and monuments. I guess her egghead facts rubbed off on me sometimes. Now, I’d like to tell you that I did something heroic, like stand up against a raging team of fire-breathing horse with only my sword. The truth is, I ran. I could hear their little minds whispering, Son of the sea god! Son of the sea god! It’s great when you’re a celebrity to squids. “You were one of them,” I promised. “Just don’t tell anybody, okay? Or I’d have to kill you.” Percy Jackson and the Bronze Dragon One dragon can ruin your whole day. Trust me, as a demigod I've had my share of bad experiences. I've been snapped at, clawed at, blowtorched, and poisoned. I've fought single-headed dragons, double-headed, eight-headed, nine-headed, and the kind with so many heads that if you stopped to count them you'd be pretty much dead. But that time with the bronze dragon? I thought for sure my friends and I were going to end up as Kibbles 'n' Dragon Bits. On the blue team were Hephaestus's cabin, Apollo, Hermes, and me—the only demigod in Poseidon's cabin. The bad news was that for once, Athena and Ares—both war god cabins—were against us on the red team, along with Aphrodite, Dionysus, and Demeter. Athena's cabin held the other flag, and my friend Annabeth was their captain. "Surprise," Annabeth said, right next me. She must've had her magic Yankees cap on, because she was totally invisible. I tried to move, but she dug her knife under my chin. Silena appeared out of the woods, her sword drawn. Her Aphrodite armor was pink and red, color-coordinated to match her clothes and makeup. She looked like Guerilla Warfare Barbie. "Nice work," she told Annabeth. An invisible hand confiscated my sword. Annabeth took off her cap and appeared before me, smiling smugly. "Boys are easy to follow. They make more noise than a lovesick Minotaur." "Isn't your mom the goddess of inventors?" I asked. Annabeth glared at me. "Yes, but I'm good with ideas. Not mechanics." I just blurted it out—to give her confidence, I guess—but immediately I realized it sounded pretty stupid. "If somebody twisted my eyeballs, I'd wake up," I agreed. "What if it goes crazy on us?" "Then... we're dead," Annabeth said. "Great," I said. "I'm psyched." This time we did not yell, "For Hephaestus!" We yelled, "Heeeeelp!" Its head creaked as it looked down at me. It seemed more confused than angry, like, Why did you cut off my toe? Annabeth came up to me and squeezed my shoulder. "Hey, seaweed brain, you okay?" "You know," Annabeth said as we struggled along, "it wasn't the bravest thing I've ever seen." "So..." I said. "I guess Silena and Charlie are going to the fireworks together." Percy Jackson and the Sword of Hades Christmas is the Underworld was NOT my idea. “Family spat?” Nico cried. “You turned me into a dandelion!” “Who?” I asked. Then I ran her through with my sword. Note to self: If you vaporize monsters, they can’t answer your questions. “Hello,” he said. “Who am I?” “You’re my friend,” I blurted out. “You’re…Bob.” The Next Great Prophecy Seven half-blood shall answer the call, To storm or fire, the world must fall, An oath to keep with a final breath, And foes bear arms to the Doors of Deaths. YEP THIS IS THE END!!!!!!!! |
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