THIS ACCOUNT IS ON FULL PAUSE FOR AN UNKNOWN LENGTH OF TIME COULD BE MONTHS COULD BE YEARS.

Hi my name's contritenut6184 but I took of the 6184 because it confuses people this account probably will take a while to upload stuff for a few reasons and ill probably end up constantly changing the chapters because of the way I write things, I just make it up as I go along, and don't tell me I should plan it out first because ill tell you now that Michel Morpurgo doesn't plan and he's my favourite author.

This account will be dedicated to POKÈMON only

THE STORY I AM CURRENTLY WRITING (very VERY VERY slowly)

to ends and back: go read the description yourself.

STORYS I WILL ATTEMPT IN THE FUTURE (maybe)

No name yet: a man lives at the top of mt silver as he has for the past 60 years, but that all changes when Mr goodshow wishes to hold a league at the top, the scout teams he sends up keep disappearing. What is happening?

30 years later or contritum tempus: when two gods fight one falls and time falls apart, all but one man become frozen in time. 30 years of solitude time restarts and some have become corrupt, it is up to this one man to save the world.

LIST OF FAVES:

fave Pokémon: umbreon.

fave Pokémon game: not sure I'm one to answer this because I haven't played a lot of them but I like black 1(not 2) because the storyline gives you resherem my favorite legendary.

fave quote's:"I don't break rules, I just ignore them"-WesternFail.
"-Be optimistic... all the people you hate are eventually going to die!!"-emeralddragon1
"-let us not pray that to be sheltered from dangers, but to be fearless when facing them-"no clue.
"-a firearm is not the weapon, but a tool... they who pulls that trigger, is the weapon-"got this on from a book somewhere

These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On a hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (You can't tell me what to do!)

On a bag of chips: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (The shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (Oh, crap...)

On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (Frozen food for thought)

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down". (NOW you tell me!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating". (You don't say?!)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (I have a schedule to keep, you know)

On Boots Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (Didn't we outlaw child labor?)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (NO... WAY!)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to...what?)

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: Keep out of children. (Que?!)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other uses." (Which would be...?)

On packet of Nobbys' Peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Shit just got real!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: Fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly". (I blame the parents for this one)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals". (Why do we have to address this directly?)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions: "Put on fork and eat." (No! Really? We're supposed to eat it?!)

On Bath Salts Directions: Put in water. (Fffffuuuuuu...!)

On Brownie Mix Directions: Preheat oven, mix brownie mix eggs, water and oil, bake, eat. (What if I don't trust my own cooking?)

Mattress: Do not attempt to swallow. (I don't even know how this is possible)

Railroad Sign: Warning: Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted. (Sentence; the electrical chair)

A sign on a Telephone pole: Do not post signs. (I hate hypocrites)

Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required. (Some assembly required? What, does it need batteries, too?)

On earplugs: These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe. (Oh good, I thought it was just going to be another warning about cancer!)

On Nabisco Easy Cheese: For best results, remove cap. (Nah, I'll take my chances)

On a Life Saving Device: This is not a Life-Saving Device. (Irony at its finest)

On a Shark Vacuum Cleaner: 1. Do not use to pick up gasoline or flammable liquids 2. Do not use to pick up anything that is currently burning. (Like that gasoline...?)

Various Computers: Keyboard not detected. Press F1 to continue. (A hammer might be more effective)

On the Japanese GameCube: Do not attempt to stick head inside deck, which may result in injury. (Well... if you say so...)

On a can of bug spray:“Harmful to bees”. (So... is it the right product??)

On a TV remote control: “Not dish washer safe”. (I'll take 500 for stupidity...)

A Television Owner’s Manual "Do not pour liquids into your television set." (Okay, scratch that. I'll take five hundred on dumb people)

A New Zealand insect spray "Not tested on animals." (Obviously... you tested it on insects, duh!)

A cardboard sun-shield that keeps sun off the dashboard "Do not drive with sun-shield in place." (Can you say "oops" before we crash?)

A cartridge for a laser printer "Do not eat toner." (I have a doctor's note...)

A computer mouse "Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." (So what am I supposed to throw, the monitor?!)

A container of underarm deodorant "Caution: Do not spray in eyes." (A human's ingenuity...)

A dishwasher carries this warning "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher." (Oh... Sorry kids, can't play in there anymore...)

A sharpening stone "Knives are sharp." (You don't say!)

A snow-blower warns "Do not use snow-blower on roof." (And how exactly am I supposed to get a snow-blower on the roof?)

A baby stroller "Remove child before folding." (Don't tell the wife...)

A pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." (How long did it take for them to figure that out?)

An electric router made for carpenters "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." (Hear that, rednecks?)

A rock garden; "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." (I beg to differ)

Wet-Nap: Tear open packet and use. (And then...?)

A Fruit Roll-Up snack "Remove plastic before eating." (So many details...)

On a bag of Marshmallows: "Flammable" (What? (Holding out marshmallow over a fire))

Children's Aspirin: Warning: Keep Away From Children. (We need to straighten our priorities out)

Candle: Warning: A burning candle is on fire. (Good to know...)

Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking (I'm on a tight schedule!)

McDonald's Coffee: Warning! Drink may be hot! (Oh, really?!)

Arm & Hammer Cat Litter: Safe to use around pets. (OH, REALLY?!?!)

Blanket from Taiwan: Warning: Not To Be Used As Protection From A Tornado. (... um...)

Matches: WARNING: Contents may catch fire. (They oughta...)

Toilet Plunger: Do not use near power lines. (Um... okay?)

Frisbee: Warning: May Contain Small Parts. (Since when?!)

Windex: Do not spray in eyes. (Yeah, that's what bleach is for!)

17 THINGS IM GOING TO DO AT WALMART TESCO (I'm English)

1.Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2.Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice leading to the restroom .

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in a official tone,"code 3' in housewares.

5.Go to service desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6.Move a "CAUTION-WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area .

7.Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8.When a clerk asks if they can help you begin to cry and ask
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9.Look write into the security camera&use it as a mirror and pick your nose.

10.While handling guns in the hunting department ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. (no guns in Tesco (unfortunately))

11.Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission impossible"theme.

12.In the auto department,practice your "Madonna look'', using different size funnels.

13.Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say ''PICK ME!'' ''PICK ME!''

14.When an announcement comes over the speaker,assume the fetal position and scream...
''NO! NO! It's those voices again!''

15.Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly,"There is no toilet paper in here!"

16.Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting"Pikachu, I choose you!"

17. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow. Magic!"

99% of teenagers would cry if they saw Justin Bieber above the skyscraper about to jump; copy and paste this to your profile if you're the 1% who would stand there with popcorn yelling, "Do a backflip!" Whoo hooo!!

HOW CRAZEE??

Crazy is when you have a voice in your head that you named Pedro, even though he clearly isn't spanish and you just do that to annoy him. (It depends on my mood,like it could be GLaDOS if I'm mad.)

Crazy is when you're so obsessed with eating your Jell-O (and you forgot to put a spoon in your lunch box) that you try drinking your Jell-O through a straw and using straw chopsticks because straws were the only untensil-type thing available.

Crazy is when you start dancing in Wal-Mart to its cheesy music.

Crazy is when you laugh uncontrollably at your own jokes.

Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what is so interesting about the eraser.

Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on.

Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself.

Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do.

Crazy is when you laugh when nothing's funny.

Crazy is when you crack up if someone says "Oatmeal!".

Crazy is when you forget what you're saying in the middle of a sentence.

Crazy is when you take the time to write down stuff like this and memorize it.

Crazy is when you are going through this as a checklist.

Crazy is when you quote Charlie the Unicorn at random moments.

Crazy is when you eat twenty pixie sticks in one day.

Crazy is when you're crazy.

Crazy is when you convince your friends you're 'high' because you can't stop laughing even when nothing is funny. And then all of you convince the nearest adult that you're having a breakdown.

Crazy is when you trip up the stairs, and laugh all the way back down them.

Crazy is when it is last day of school you scream and run around in circles.

Crazy is when you can call yourself something else, and completely become that person, forgetting your reason for hating the world,

Crazy is when you laugh at nothing during school and laugh when everyone looks at you like your insane.

Crazy is when you trip over nothing at all, fall, and say "I see the ground...it's pretty".

Crazy is when you are asked to get someone's phone from the other room, and you go and grab it ethically, then crack up and spit out your Oreos halfway through.

Crazy is when you hit your head on an object, then start yelling and swearing revenge.

Crazy is when you mix five boxful of Jello Pudding Mix with Dish Soap and Green food coloring in a jar,pour it on the side-walk,and say it's "alien bloooood".

Crazy is when you make up stupid texts and faces just for pleasure.

Crazy is when your laughing so hard that you inhale a whole packet of fun dip (ohhhhhhh how much it burns)

Crazy is when you want to wear fake furry ears and a tail to an anthro planet just to see how everyone reacts

Crazy is when you make a fool of yourself then call your self a physco

Crazy is when you stay up all night to read fanfiction only to realize you've already read it before

Crazy is when you convince yourself that guy you saw walk past the door, was really nothing.

CRAZY IS WHEN YOU TYPE STUFF LIKE THIS IN CAPS AT 3 IN THE MORNING FOR NO REASON WHILE LISTENING TO MUSIC YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE.

If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!