![]() REASONS TO JOIN THE DARK SIDE: 1. We have cookies (and hot chocolate too) 2. We get to meet the recruitment bunny! 3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body! 4. You get a really cool crazy laugh! Practice with me, people: MWA HAHAHAHA cough cough! 5. You get to walk out of shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guys! 6. One word: MINIONS: Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself . . . Now that's the life! 7. Money, money, money: Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys? 8. WORLD DOMINATION! 9. I'm just evil If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. (rah x 2) (ah x 3) (roma romamma) (ga x 2) ( ooh la x 2) = bad romance If the enemy is in range, so are you. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself 'where the heck is my ceiling?' Never take life seriously, it's just a stupid game with no rules. Nobody gets out alive anyway. People are like slinkies; basically useless, but ever so amusing to push down stairs. I'm not insensitive, I just don't care. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. I'm the special one. I'm not so good with advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? I feel so miserable without you, it's almost like having you here. Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them. Never tell your problems to any one. 20% don't care and the other 80% are glad that you have them. A celebrity is someone who works all their life to become famous, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized. Murphy was totally an optimist. Life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, so waste your time and have the time of your life. Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected expected? 1f y0u c4n r34d 7h15, y0u r34lly n33d t0 g47 l41d. (If you can read this, you really need to get laid.) Don't knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run. He hates that. Boys fall for me - because I trip them. Adults are just kids with money. Everyone has the right to their own opinion . . . yours is just wrong. Pandas are the least racist - they're black, white, and Asian. A fly without wings is a walk. Iwounderifanyoneknowswhatthebigstickatthebottomofthekeyboradisfor? Energizer bunny arrested: charged with battery. I hear that unicorns ride on silver moonbeams and shoot rainbows out their arses. If common sense is so common, why do so little people have it? Whomever says "words don't hurt" never got hit with a dictionary. If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then use the profits to buy an assault rifle. See if life makes the same mistake twice. Q's are just O's with fancy tails. Others cry, I cry. Others laugh, I laugh. Others jump of a cliff, I laugh harder. So that no one blames me of prejudice, I just want to say: I have no prejudices in any way shape or form. I hate everyone equally. I think, therefore I get a headache. I smile because I have no idea what's going on. I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. Death is life's way of telling you you're fired. Somewhere, Grammar died. He was buried next to his loving wife, Punctuation. Their evil step-brother's sister's father's other child's grandfather's grandchild, Txtspeech, stood upon their graves and laughed victoriously. Then some heroic Beta shot him. Repeatedly. Your result for The Sorting Hat Test ... SLYTHERIN! You scored 64% Slytherin, 16% Ravenclaw, 32% Gryffindor, and 20% Hufflepuff! Or perhaps in Slytherin You'll make your real friends, These cunning folk use any means To achieve their ends. "The cruelest lies are often told in silence." "The truth shall set you free, but first it shall piss you off." "Everything happens for a reason...except for clowns.I mean, seriously, what the hell?" "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic. DON'T STEREOTYPE! PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE AND BOLD THE ONES YOU ARE! STOP STEREOTYPING! IT'S WRONG AND HURTFUL! THANK YOU! 95 percent of kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're one of the 5 that don't, copy this to your profile. If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile. If you think homophobia is wrong and get into fights about it, copy this to your profile. If you have ever run into a door, copy this to your profile. If you are obsessed with fanfiction, copy this to your profile. Weird is good, strange is bad and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this to your profile. If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile. If you walk into walls because you have your nose in a book, copy this to your profile. If you have ever fallen up a flight of stairs, copy this to your profile. Recent studies show that 92 percent of teenagers have moved on to rap. If you are part of the 8 percent that stayed with rock, put this in your profile. If you correct the grammar of people on TV, copy and paste this to your profile. PLEASE READ WHAT'S UNDER THIS!! I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian. I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman. I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight throuth the painful, tear-filled nights. We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time. I am the man who died alone in the hospital bacause they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room. I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me. I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a come for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again. I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear. We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rest a one-bedroom for two men. I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me. I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman. I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male. I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men. I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that. I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual. I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to always deal with society hating me. I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind. I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love. I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents he loves another male. Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it The Ten Ways to know you're a real writer: 1. You get extremely grumpy and unpleasant if there is more than a 24-hour 2. You sometimes act out your story ideas by yourself. 3. If you don't have your own laptop, you are begging desperately for it. 4. You occasionally speak with adverbs such as 'wistfully' or 'reluctantly'. 5. You get super duper excited every time your fanfic gets a new review. 6. You have a really long profile. 7. You get goosebumps for planning out stories in your head. 9. You bring either your laptop or your notebook EVERYWHERE. FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies. FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!" FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up! When you dial a mental hospital: Ring...Ring... Welcome to Psychiatric World. If you are obsessive-complusive, please press one repeatedly. If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2. If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6. If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the phone so we can trace the call. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and the little voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer. If you are delusional and hallucinate, please be aware that the thing you are holding on the side of your head is alive and about to bite off your ear. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism |
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