I am a person. At least that's what they want me to believe, but I know them, I know all about their little games and I won't be fooled! They lie, they tell me I exist, but this is also untrue. I am an anomaly, a point of the universe where there is a space of pure nothingness, a perfect vacuum, absolute zero. This particular point of complete nonexistence has a designation, it is know as "that bit where my brain is."

Don't let them fool you, don't let your guard down, and most important of all, never ever let anyone with a theoretical physics doctorate and an enthusiastic manner anywhere near your cranial cavity.

I am crazy. I draw to much. I pretend I can play the piano when really I'm just pressing KEYS!! I am a genius. I am also an idiot. Hahahahahahaha!! onomatopoeia makes me laugh. does onomatopoeia make you laugh also? raise your hand if onomatopoeia makes you lau-PUT YOUR HAND DOWN YOU FUCKING IDIOT YOU'LL GET US ALL KILLED!!!!!!! oh wait, that was me. Dumbass.

I like poetry, I also hate people who go out of their way to tell people that they like poetry because they think it will make them seem sophisticated...

If you ever meet someone who says something mean about me punch them in the face, if enough people start doing this then the negative reinforcement will make people revere me and I'll laugh because that would be the funniest thing that could ever happen. Ever.

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That is not me. All that stuff is just some funny things I wrote. It isn't me and it doesn't describe me. I cannot describe myself, and I won't try. I am an ass sometimes, for which I apologize, but even that isn't me, that is simply something I do. Who I am is a feeling, an impression of character gained from tiny bits of insight as to the workings of my mind. Do not presume to know me through what I create, for these are but glimpses. They are only the flashes of the image seen through gaps in a fence as you speed past the house that is me.

My name is Tacke, and I swear to god I will eat your fucking unicorn.

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